I looked into the mirror and saw a few purple marks. Shit. Why didn't Francis say anything? He's definitely the jealous type. I went to Francis to ask.

"Do you see anything on my neck?"
"No. Why?" He asked confused
"Uh...I was doing my makeup and thought I got lipstick on my neck" I lied
"I don't see anything" he shrugged

I looked in the mirror again. They're definitely there...Am I going crazy?

I must be going crazy. I could've have seen Alex last night...or done..that.

I laid beside Francis.
"I thought you were gonna do your makeup" he said
"I decided not to" I shrugged. He wrapped his arm around me. I miss when Alex did that.
"I want Alex back" I said
"I know you do.." he sighed. He's probably tired of me talking about it.
"Am I annoying?" I asked
"Not at all"
"Are you sure? I don't talk about Alex too much do I?" I kept questioning
"John you're not annoying. Stop worrying so much" he assured me
"Thanks.." I mumbled. He kissed my cheek.

I don't care if I'm married to Francis. I need Alex. He's all that matters.

I slowly drifted off to sleep. I had the weirdest dream...

I was in this auction and the only other thing was a pile of millions of diamonds but everyone wanted me. And then it changed to right before the car was going to hit me. Then it changed again to me sleeping beside Alex's tombstone. It kept changing and it was like a weird timeline of Alex's death and then I saw two guys.

One had curly orange hair and freckles that only covered his nose and cheeks and the other guy was taller than the red head and he had blonde hair. Then everything went black.

I woke up screaming. Francis woke up from my screaming.

"John what's wrong?!" He asked. I hugged him and started sobbing.
"What happened?" He asked hugging me tightly
"I h-had a bad d-dream" I said wiping away tears
"Was it about Alex again?" He asked. I reluctantly nodded.
"Wanna go see him?"
"But it's 3AM..."
"I mean in the morning"
"Please" I said burying my face in his shoulder
"Ok I'll take you. Try and go back to sleep" he said laying back down

I wrapped my arm around his waist and buried my face in his side. He wrapped an arm around me.

I felt bad. It should be Alex wrapping an arm around me.

I couldn't go back to sleep that night no matter how hard I tried.

The next day Francis took me to see Alex. I sat beside his tombstone and talked to him for an hour.

"I got promoted at work the other week." I told him about everything "Eleanor did a project at school and put you as her hero. I was really proud of her. Francis is really nice but I really miss being with you. I hope you're not mad about me being with him."

"John can we go? You've been here an hour" Francis asked
"No! I don't want to leave yet!" I said crossing my arms. I can be a brat when I want to be.
"Ok.."

"I was telling Alex about you"
"Really?" He mused
"Yeah..and about Ellie" I went on
"That's good" he smiled

I would tell him about my dream but I have a feeling he did it. Alex would do something meaningful and extra like that. I got up, ready to go.

"Bye Lexi" I said waving
"Cmon" Francis kissed my cheek

We went back to the apartment. I fed my turtles and let them roam around on the table.

"Dad are you ok? You've had a lot of episodes lately" Eleanor said nervously
"Yeah I'm fine. Why?" I asked
"You woke me up last night screaming.."
"Oh..sorry" I mumbled watching Theodosia try and get to Philip on the other side of the table. I love turtles.

I also love Alex. But he's gone.

Never leave me turtles. Please. Don't be an Alex.

Eh...a turtle can't push me out of the way of an on coming vehicle.