<"Tears are words that need to be written." ~ Paulo Coelho>

|Jadesola|

Sunday, July 4, 2021

WHO FALLS in love with another man in less than a month?! Well, Jadesola, owner of the bankrupt casino, Pepper Dem, takes the lead. It seems like she has gotten over her thieving fiance and is now in a whirlwind romance with multi-billionaire Kian. We wonder why though. It could be his money, his madly dashing looks or his manhood. . .

Chloe: Jade, shit just hit the fan! You're on the news and for the bad kind. Since when did you start dating Kian? Girl, this is bad, very very bad. Also, your mom is threatening to blow off my phone with calls and I cannot hold her off any longer. Pick my calls girl, I'm worried.

As unbelievable as it sounded, this was the text message I'd woken up to, groggy as fuck. She'd called, eight missed calls and when no one picked, unsurprisingly, she'd forwarded the news to me. Needless to say, all the sleep had cleared off, my mouth hanging open once I read what the Chicago Tribune had posted. My impeccable reputation was in tatters, thanks to my boss.

The infuriating thought hit me like a sledgehammer and an ache began pounding in my temple. Hard and furious.

"Fucking hangover," I moaned, clutching my forehead. The gnawing pain threatened to push me back onto the bed, but I clenched my teeth and rolled off. My eyes spun, tummy heaving and I leaned forward, blindly searching for something to hold onto.

"These are the reasons why you shouldn't drink Jadesola," I muttered to myself, promising to never drink freely but I knew I would break that vow. Desperate times called for desperate measures. Just like yesterday.

Still in a daze, I staggered to the bathroom, images of my terrible ordeal at his hands flashing through my mind's eyes.

My unanswered pleas. The unholy gleam in his eyes as he took my mouth. The terrible words. Whore. Black slut.

Disgust ran amok in me. Unable to contain the rolling motions of my stomach, I vomited and everything came splashing back out. Bits and pieces of undigested food littered the toilet seat. An eyesore.

Trails of his cum that clung to my lips, seeping onto the bed. His searching fingers penetrating my vagina. A twisting pain.

Spine arched, I retched again, the sour taste of acidic food bits leaving a bitter aftertaste. This time there was nothing welling forth from my guts. Just dry, heavy gasps of air.

My breakdown. The mantra of sorry's. Falling asleep in his arms. Him changing my clothes.

A dark surge of resentment zapped through me, as I tried to step away from the mess decorating the toilet bowl. How dare he touch me after all he'd done? Shivering fingers formed claws and I began stripping, anger and revulsion churning within my stomach. I didn't want to be clad in anything he'd touched.

As the nightwear pooled on the floor, lights overhead, casting bright rays on her skin, the woman's reflection stared at me. Her dull eyes were sunken, breasts jutting out, with nipples that weren't too sore any longer and the hickey that bloomed purple by the side of her neck. I knew the physical bruises would fade- the aching muscles in her privates, but I wasn't sure of the internal wounds. Not when a splitting headache and a deep emptiness resonated within her soul.

Sliding my eyes across the woman's body again, I didn't recognize her. She was unknown, a mere mockery of the brave person I once stood for. And I hated it. I hated her. The woman in the mirror was alien and she had let that bastard do all that to her.

Fed up staring at that powerless image, I slid to the tiled floor.

Vacant was my gaze but the thoughts ricocheting within me, the opposite. No one could calculate the amount of animosity I possessed towards Kian, motherfucking Fields. For everything he'd done to me, he deserved it tenfold. I yearned to kill him, bring him down with every breath I took.

A bleed for a bleed. A cry for a cry.

"Fuck you Kian," I gritted between clenched teeth, tears forming in my eyes, agonizing. Same as the pain lodged deep in my belly.

The phone buzzed out loud, jarring me. It was either Mom or Chloe and while I appreciated their concern, I possessed no strength to stand up. But I'd already missed their calls, and my mother must be very anxious. With that in mind, I crawled out of the bathroom, past my shattered mirror and next to the bed. Reaching out, I tapped the screen.

Perverted Asswipe is calling.

He was calling and expecting me to pick up? A frown marred my brows, a war waging within my mind. To throw my phone away or watch it ring? I chose the latter, unwilling to vent my anger out on the poor device. Done assaulting my ears with its ringtone, silence reigned.

Until it rang again. Fuck. I bit my lips and gazed heavenwards. Why the fuck was he blowing this phone off?

Vexed to the core, I rocked on my knees, tamping down the insistent urge to smash it against the wall. The urge won. Quick, my fingers curled around its edges, aimed to throw—

1, 2, 3. . .

The call ceased. Finally.

Struck with relief, I was about to lower my hand to the bed when another ping went off. A message.

What now? Couldn't a girl hate on herself in peace?

I swiped.

Iya mi: You've grown wings, bah? No longer answering calls, shey? Omo rada rada. I didn't want to believe what Olayinka said, that you might be sleeping with your boss for money but after seeing the news, I don't know who my well-brought up daughter is anymore. Bring your boyfriend to my house tonight. He has to answer to me and until I am sure about you guys, I will not endorse your relationship. I don't care whether you're 24 or not. What I say goes and I mean this. My daughter can never bear the name, ashawo. Mbanu! Emi ke? Rara o! What will our family and friends think, ni?!

I blinked. Reread the message. Then blinked again. My own mother thought I was an ashawo? Two-cent prostitutes who stood on the road of Lagos at night? A scream of bitter disbelief tore through my throat and I flung the phone at last— giving into the desire.

As I did, I had a flashback.

"Do you love him?" my cousin asked, after Kian had escorted me to tell her goodbyes. In her beautiful wedding gown and dazzling smile, she resembled an angel.

"Me?" I giggled, drunk as heck. "Yes of course."

Her brows knitted. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, cousin dearest. I really really love him, with all my heart." To prove my point, I placed a hand on my chest, mimicking a heart, still in the throes of the alcoholic drink.

"You have to be careful. He is the very devil. I don't know the exact reason you're with him but whatever you do, guard your heart. Kian is not fit to be loved."

"Whatever you say, Mami." I snickered, enraptured by the glittering stones on the bosom of her white gown.

I must have staggered because Olayinka held me tight to steady my posture. She looked me straight in the eye, concern shining in hers. "Drinking is so unlike you. Something happened. Tell me, Jadesola. What happened to you when you and Kian left an hour ago?"

I giggled again and patted her cheeks gently. "How did you know? Before Mom shouted at me, that was the juicy gist I wanted to spill about him and I. But if Mom didn't want me to say, I'm not sure I should tell you either."

Her brows rose in suspicion and she placed both hands on my shoulders. "Tell me, Jadesola. Am I not your cousin? Tell me."

"Okay." I grinned. "He did things to me and —"

Just as I was about to say more, Kian stormed to us, glowering at Olayinka. He extracted her from my hold and snaked an arm around my waist and in a grumpy voice, said, "I will be taking Jadesola home now."

Olayinka's lips thinned but she didn't say a word. I had a feeling she suspected there was much more to the story than I was telling but I'd already bid her goodbye, Kian stealing me away into his car.

Olayinka had betrayed me. How could she tell my mother that? Without evidence?! And mom? For what reason would she believe that I would actually sleep with that lowlife?

"Why's my life so fucked up?!" I yelled, sobs escaping my trembling lips. "Everyone thinks I'm a whore, including my own mother!"

Fury and anguish rolled off me in waves, digging vicious stabs in my chest. Yes, I knew she was still mad after my misbehavior at the wedding party but was it only her reputation that she cared about? What of mine? Did she not know my fake boyfriend was a monster?

You never told her, Jadesola. You never told anybody.

I sank to the floor, the anger gone with only the bitter remnants of sadness. My mom was stubborn and I knew she wouldn't stop bugging me until she was satisfied. One way or another, I had to convince her that I was truly in love with that disgusting bastard.

I had zero clue as to how but I did know that the bastard was going to do it my way or he was facing charges. Even if I went down along with him because either way, we were going down together.

With renewed vigor and determination, I straightened up and brushed my teeth to remove the sour taste of alcohol coupled with something else I didn't want to recall. Then I bathed, scrubbing fiercely to rid myself of his touch and dressed up in the most decent clothes I could find.

Thumping a mug on the dresser after gulping down two tablets of aspirin, I headed to the door, phone in hand. Fury didn't allow me to rethink my decision even as a series of negative thoughts assaulted me.

You're heading to the monster's den without an ounce of protection? Girl, how are you to face him again? After all he's done?

No idea. I was already shivering just from the thought of having to see his shadow next to me.

I'll deal with it when I cross that line, I assured myself.

About to step out, I yanked the room's door open and was met with a face—Kian's.

My mouth fell open in shock as I gawked at him. His right hand was fisted mid-air- as if he had been on the verge of knocking. In his left hand was a rose bouquet and tucked between his elbow, was a box of Cadbury and a black case.

Without warning, the dark memories came flooding back causing me to lower my lashes, unable to meet his eyes. My entire body was in severe paralysis, frozen. What was he even doing here?

"These are for you," he started, displaying the chocolates, flowers and that unknown box. "I hope—"

Swift, I banged the door in his face, placing my back against it. Pure disbelief ran rife through my veins, a part of me unable to accept the fact that he was here. My abuser was here.

A/N: I have part two written, it just needs intense editing actually because I cannot post something unedited. BUT FINALLY, I AM BACK! Yay!!!!! Thoughts on the chapter btw? (Been a while I wrote so my writing style might have deviated a bit.😞💔 Trust me to stop taking long breaks from books. Le sigh.) Btw, thank you for 32.7k reads! I'm so happy!🤩✨

Btw, there's a drawing I had someone make of Kian and Jadesola. While I know it's not really an appropriate time to post it considering the emotional turmoil these two are going through, I'm still going to show you all.

Heads up, I don't really like the drawing.💀💔 But I paid for it so I might as well post it.

What dyu think?? Is it giving? Me, nah not really.🫠💔

Love, Nita.