Olivia North

It's been three days since dad got a heart attack. Three days of me trying to let the situation sink in to me. Zac, Nick, and dad forced me to go home and take a rest last night. Nick was actually the one who drove me home while Zac stayed with dad. Now I am on my way to the hospital to visit dad.

The day dad got conscious was when Zac got home from India. When he woke up, he was surprised and mad to see me. At first he was just making an excuse as to why he got admitted in the hospital but when I told him that I knew about his heart problem, he got apeshit mad. He called uncle Eriq, his doctor and friend, to reprimand him and remind him about patient and doctor confidentiality.

He told me that I wasn't supposed to know that he's sick, he tried to throw me outside the room but I stood my ground and told him that I wasn't going to leave him. Then that's when he calmed down.

After that ruckus, I didn't talk to him about his illness but I did asked and convinced him to undergo angioplasty. He just told me that it's up to him if he's going to treat himself or not.

Just like the last years we are in a not talking arrangement but it's his turn to ignore me. I admit, it wasn't easy for me to put up with Dad when he's being this difficult but I wont back down, at the end of the day, I will get to convince him to undergo treatment. And this I promise to myself and mom.

On my way to the hospital, I went to the manor and have Lorna cook chicken noodle soup for dad. Uncle Eriq told her what kinds of food and how much salt has to be in dad's food that's why I asked her to prepare food for dad.

After parking my car, I saw Nick's black Volvo xc90 parked at the parking lot. I didn't know that he's going to visit dad today but I guess he wanted to see dad first before he go to work. I smiled at the car and thought that he really is close to my dad, that he treats my dad as his dad and vice versa and I am grateful for it.

I was going to open dad's room when I heard dad shouted my name angrily.
I opened the door quietly to eavesdrop because I think there's something I needed to know and it's been bugging me ever since I knew that dad got a heart attack.

"What now, Zachary and Niccolo? Olivia now knows about my condition. I told you two to not let her know about this! That's the only thing I asked of you and yet this one simple heart attack she knew! What now, huh? What now!" Dad's voice boomed all around the room. I gasped silently and closed my mouth with my palm.

What? They knew about his condition? Since when? And he doesn't want me to know?

"You Niccolo, you were here when Olivia talked to Eriq, why didn't you do something to prevent her talking to him? And you Zac, you should've called Eriq first and tell him to lie to Olivia. Was it so hard to do? And Lorna, I told him to call any of you when this happen again but she called her instead. Are you all defying me?" Dad asked.

I couldn't believe it, dad wanted to keep it a secret from me and it appears that I was the only one who he kept in the dark. Everyone knew about his heart problem but me.

"Dad, it's time for Livy to know your illness, we cannot kept it a secret for her anymore. She had to know." Zac sighed.

"I do believe so, Tony. Olivia has the right to know and it's hard for me to tell Dr. Stuart to lie to Livy when she's crying not knowing what happened to you. She needs to know Tony, besides it's been a year and a half, you're heart is deteriorating, you need to undergo angioplasty." Nick seconded.

"I've told you before and I will tell it to you again, it's not you and you, or anyone's business if I am going to take treatment or not. Just do what you two are told, take care of Olivia. That's it!" He said with finality. I couldn't take it anymore so I spoke and entered the room.

"I can take care of myself and it's my business to know about your health, dad." I said while walking towards him. Three of them were so shocked to see me, especially me hearing what they talked about. I halted a few meters from them and spoke again.

"It's been a year and a half, no one bothered to tell me. You all kept me in the dark! I get it now, this was the reason why you wanted me to work at the company and marry Niccolo. And also, this was the reason why you stepped down from the chairmanship post all of a sudden. It makes sense to me now." I wiped the tears running down from my eyes.

"I was really an idiot. I am useless! How did I not notice that you're sick. The non-stop coughing, the medicines in your cabinet, the bland tastes of your food, and the shortness of your breathe. I couldn't believe I've already seen all these symptoms and I took it all for granted." I paused to wipe my tears then continued.

"Do you hate me dad? Is this your way of telling me that I don't deserve to know about your illness? That you didn't trust me to take care of you?" I asked.

"No no no no no no, princess. I don't and never hated you. I just---"

"THEN WHY?! WHY DID KEEP IT A SECRET FROM ME?" I shouted and interrupted dad.

"Because I didn't want to hurt you, my Livy. I didn't want to see you hurting just like before." I raised my finger to shush him and he did.

"No. You just don't want me to interfere. You knew that when I knew about your condition, I will convince you for treatment and you didn't want that. You wanted to follow mom that's why you've searched for someone like Niccolo to marry me and asked Zac to groom me for our company so that I can take his position after he became chairman. Now don't tell me I was wrong. You planned everything ahead so that when you die, I am not a shame to the family anymore. Right?!" I shouted once again.

"No, Olivia. That's not it. I--" I interrupted him again.

"Save it. I'm leaving." I turned around and exited his room. I heard Nick and Zac calling me but I ignored it and walked quickly. I don't think I can face them knowing that they're apart of Dad's sham.

But I was quickly turned around by my arm and collided to someone's chest. I looked up and saw Nick, I pushed him and told him to leave me alone. I walked towards the lift but he took my arm again. I slapped him on his face and pointed my index finger at him.

"No. Stop! I don't want to talk to you. So leave me alone!" I pushed him harder and fortunately the lift opened and I quickly entered and closed it.

I ran towards the parking lot and sat on my car. I cried and cried until I ran out of tears to cry. Then I started my car knowing where I should go to.

I threaded the familiar mosses and went inside the beautiful mausoleum where mom was buried.

I remember the day mom was buried here. I cried a lot just like I did in the past three days. It was like another the wound on my heart was reopened again and the feeling of abandonment was coming back to me.

I took a sit on the tiled bench by the empty space beside mom. This is the spot where dad wants to rest, beside mommy.

I am sorry dad but this time, I will make sure you won't have your way. It's enough for me to agree to work and marry Nick because of your illness, now it's me whom you should listen to. It's not yet your time to follow mom, you will live and enjoy life once more.

I stayed at the mausoleum for almost half of the day. I talked to mom and devised a plan to make dad agree to undergo treatment. Then my phone rang, I looked at the caller ID and saw Zac's name, I ignored it because I was mad at him and Nick for keeping it a secret from me.

For the nth time, my phone rang again and I saw Erin's name. I was going to pick it up but I did otherwise because I knew that Zac had already told her what happened and asked her to call me. By now they know that I wasn't in the office nor in my apartment and I don't give a damn. I just wanted to be alone and think so I turned off my phone.

At around 6 in the evening, I finally convinced myself to go home and have something to eat. However, my hand has its own brain and before I knew it, I was driving towards the direction of the hospital.

For the second time, I was standing outside dad's room. Now I wasn't eavesdropping but I was mustering my courage and strength to talk to dad. I just hope that both Nick and Zac wasn't inside.

I took a deep breathe and knocked, the door was opened by Lorna and she smiled at me. I smiled back and asked if dad's still awake, she nodded and told me that she'll be outside if ever I needed her. I nodded and gave her a brief hug.

As I entered the room, I saw dad quietly reading a book. He looked so peaceful and content, it's like he's diagnosed with a terminal ill heart problem. I didn't want to admit it but he really looked like he's accepted his fate and was ready to follow mom. My eyes got watery but I blinked back the tears because I know if I showed dad that I am broken, it will just worsen the situation. So I blew out a breathe and repeated the mantra 'I can do this' quietly.

"Uncle Eriq said that you needed rest. You should be lying down not reading." I said and took an apple from the basket and started slicing them. Thank God for Mrs. Knights lessons, I now know how to slice fruits properly.

"I am fine, my Livy. You don't have to listen to everything that Eriq's saying. I am okay." Dad chuckled and put aside the book he was reading. I was still silent and slicing the apple for him.

"Where were you today? Zac and Nick were trying to call you but they turned off your phone." Dad asked me, I took the mobile table and placed  a plate with apples atop it for him to eat and gave him a fruit picker cutlery.

"I was at mom's." He was about to eat a piece of apple but he placed it again on the plate when he heard me.

"I tried picturing you being buried in that empty space beside her. But I really can't. Why dad? Why did you want to die? To what? To be with mom? That's bullshit, dad. Bullshit." I stated calmly and took a sit beside his bed.

"Don't you wanna spend time with me? Do you really not love me? After mom died you distanced yourself from me, you worked 24 hours a day for seven days. You barely went home, you didn't attend any of my contests and high school and college graduation. All you did was to make sure that I was well taken cared of by all the people you hired as well as Zac. You even let Zac to have the responsibility to take care of me." I chuckled.

"You know what's one of the reasons why I took a master's degree, dad?" I looked at him and he was just looking at me sadly. He shook his head and I scoffed.

"Of course you don't. It's because I wanted you to attend my graduation. I wanted to know how it feels to graduate when your there. That's why when Zac told me that you'd come, I was so ecstatic and excited. I kept thanking mom that night, you know. I also said to myself that I was also important to you. That you didn't completely forgot about me." I smiled at him and he was just staring at me with sadness in his eyes.

"Now that we've became close again, I learned about your illness, about you not wanting it to be treated, and about you keeping it a secret from me. I am mad at you. So mad that I wanted to inject you an anesthesia and tell uncle Eriq to proceed with the surgery but I won't do that." I paused and took a deep breathe.

"Now that I knew about your secret, I started to think that you really didn't change, dad. You still get some people to look out and take care of me, and that is Niccolo. Dad do you think I am hard to be taken cared of that you can't do it by yourself? Do you think I am burden to you that's why you kept looking for people to do the job for you? It hurts you know, to feel this way. To feel that I am just a burden to my own dad. ---"

"You are not a burden to me, sweetheart. You are not. You're my most treasured jewel, Olivia, please don't think of yourself like that." He took my hand in his.

"Then why are you making me feel this way, dad? For a second I thought that we are now getting close again but we're actually not. You just looked at it as your way of spending time with me before you die. Did you even want to spend time with me or were you just forced to do so?" A lone tear came out of my eye.

"No, sweetheart. Spending some time with you was my favorite. Please don't ever ever think that I don't love you, Olivia. I'm sorry if you felt that way. I'm sorry if you felt that I abandoned you, my Livy. It's just that I didn't think that I was capable to take care of you especially when I saw how hurt you were when Emilia died. I thought that you will think that I am trying to replace or erase your mom when I tried to take care of you by myself. Also, I gave you everything because I wanted you to forget how hurt you were. I am so sorry Olivia, I let you felt that way." I cried and removed my hand from dad's hold and put my face on my palms.

He caressed my hair while repeatedly apologizing to me. I cried so hard the nth time today. I didn't know that's how he felt. All these years I thought he neglected me because he didn't want to associate himself to me anymore or I was a burden to him.

After I composed myself, I looked at him and spoke.

"If you're really sorry dad, you will make it up to me by agreeing to the surgery. That's the only way I can forgive you." I held both of his hands and pleaded with my eyes.

I saw hesitation in them and a long silence enveloped the room.

"Dad, please. I still need you. I want you to walk me down the aisle, to be there when I give birth, to my child's first birthday party, to see Zac getting married and having his own family. Dad please, I want you to live a happy life from now on. I want you to enjoy life with us. I know you misses mom, i miss her too, but we still have each other, we can go to her and spend time with her, daddy. Just please don't give up just yet. Please I still need you. We still need you." I said while hugging him.

He stayed silent until uncle Eriq and a nurse entered his room for his medicine and brief check up. They gave dad a pill that is also can him drowsy for him to take a rest. Right after he sleeps, I went home to my apartment to freshen up and get some clothes because I planned to stay with dad tonight.

When I opened my apartment, I saw Niccolo pacing to and from in my living room. I furrowed my brows and closed the door. He halted and looked at my way, when he saw me, he immediately went to me and hugged me tightly.

"Olivia, thank God you're here. I thought something happened to you. Why did you turn off your phone, we were looking for you all over. Thank God nothing happened to you." He looked at me and checked my body if I was hurt or something and when he was certain that I wasn't hurt, he hugged me again. Oh Niccolo, it's hard not to get mad at you.

But no. I have to be at least irritated by him. He's part of dad's plan to kept his illness a secret from me.

When he realized that I didn't return his hug and he's not getting any reaction from me, he released me from his hug and held my shoulders.

"I know you're mad at me, Olivia. And there's no explanation that can justify what we did to you, but please let me apologize for keeping it a secret from you. I'm so sorry, Livy, I really do." I looked at him and bursted into tears. I hugged him and cried on his shoulder.

"I don't want to lose him, Niccolo. I still need him. I don't want to lose someone again." I cried harder and I felt him hugged me tighter and he whispered a lot of comforting words to me until i ran out of tears to cry.

"You will not lose your dad, Livy. He will live." He whispered and carried me to my room in bridal style. He laid me on my bed and wiped my face. He took a sit on my bed and caressed my face. My body was fighting the fatigue but when he said to me to rest, my body gave up and succumbed to sleep.

I closed my eyes after I told him to not leave me. When I felt his embrace I hugged him too.

"Nick, I am still mad at you." I said.

"I know. Now take a rest and sleep now." He said and I succumbed to darkness.

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