you try to find happiness in addictions
in cigarettes and burning liqour but you see
it never works even though you say it will
because of them happy you will never be

its all pointless no matter what you say
courage and smiles and all the lies you tell
through all the tears you never cried
you will pretend and say you handled it well

happy is just a word and so is sad and pain
and other words like hurt or sadness
repeating them cant end well for you
it can only end with darkness and madness

i want to believe that it helps me cope
i want to believe it will all end well
but way down is to long and bottom is dark
and i am falling , its been a while since i fell