man with a plan and co.

"Y-you're Captain America."

Avengers Facility - January 9th, 2016

Aaand the hearing in her left ear was officially gone again.

Christa groaned. She wasn't even that frightened at the blast that had proceeded to shatter the ability in the "hearing enhancer" in her left ear to work. And now, hands pressed against it, her head was ringing like someone had just played into it the first few notes of "Phantom of the Opera" via megaphone. She'd jumped, for sure, but then she'd noticed she could only (faintly) hear in one ear, and then she was annoyed as heck because she had just gotten it back, that little bi--

"What the hell are you doing?!" she shrieked. She was in the room that was supposedly Stark's tech room, and sure some security would be necessary, but this was not what she had been expecting. And she couldn't see a freaking thing. What, had she gone blind, too?

Another blast came by her, this time on her right side but further away than before. So that little hearing device didn't get turned into such a useless hunk of metal.

"Stop! I'm not stealing anything, I swear! You're gonna turn me into barbeque!" Christa exclaimed. She groaned. "This was not how I planned on my winter break going!"

Suddenly, light. It coursed into the room, and Christa had to blink to get her brown eyes adjusted to the sudden blast of light. She took in the view. The room looked as high-tech as the rest of the facility (as much as she had seen, anyway)--no, actually, it was way more so. It looked like an obstacle course--a crazy, super-scary, legitimately life-threatening obstacle course.

And in front of her, a man in a huge metal bird-suit. His hands held were held out threateningly, as though the blasts had come from the metal attached to them. He had on a visor, and the wings--they were huge.

"Why was Big Bird trying to kill me?!" Christa shrieked as she took the man in.

"Why did a kid break into the ATTETP?" the man bellowed as he landed himself on top of what appeared to be a rock wall (except instead of rocks, it appeared to be made of metal--and--was some of it melting? Dripping down like lava? What the heck did these people think they were doing?). He lowered his hands, but Christa could see they were tense, as though ready to attack at a moment's notice.

Christa raised both of her eyebrows. "The what now?"

The man took a deep breath, as though steadying himself to say something he didn't want to--almost like he'd had to say it over and over again, and it was getting old.

"The... token... puppy... eel?"

Oh, why did her hearing have to mess with her right now?

"Excuse me, I can't hear you. What did you just say?" She knew she sounded rude, but... hey, she wasn't in the best mood right now.

The man closed his eyes, as though attempting not to roll them, and said again, more loudly and clearly this time.

"The Avengers Tier Twenty-Eight Traceur Parkour. Now what were you doing?"

Okay, so it still sounded kind of like an alien language, but she would go with it.

"You mean obstacle course. The word you're looking for is obstacle course," Christa quipped, folding her arms. "And would you speak a little louder in general, please? Your blaster-gun-hand-thing made me lose hearing in my left ear--again."

"Well... I'm sorry about your ear!" the man yelled, more loudly this time, for which Christa was grateful. "Now stop avoiding the question, kid! I need to take care of you! And quickly, because this is timed!"

Christa stepped back a few inches, raising her hands up. "That doesn't mean you're going to kill me, does it?"

The man's face turned to one of confusion and almost offense. "No that does not mean I'm going to kill you!"

"Good, because I wasn't planning on dying as soon as I found heaven." What? The place was a technology-obsessed-person's paradise.

The man looked even more confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Why are you trying to kill me?" Christa countered--loudly.

"SAM! What's taking so long?" shouted a strong, potentially familiar male voice from below.

"I've got a bit of a situation up here!" Sam hollered back down.

"Your first time up there and you can't get back down? I thought you could fly, or are you afraid of heights?" called a female voice, a tint of some sort of accent to her words.

"That's not what I mean!" Sam said back. "There's a girl here who, upon closer inspection, was not supposed to be an obstacle to get past! Though, to be honest, she's starting to feel like one!"

Christa scoffed and started turning around. "Don't mind me, I'll just head back now--"

"Oh, no, you won't!" Sam's face zipped back to Christa. "You're gonna explain what you're doing here--now!"

"We're coming up!" the male voice called.

"I've got it under--okay," the man began to now mutter, "okay. The one time I'm in charge of a problem--"

"You're the Falcon, aren't you?" Christa interrupted.

The man's face snapped towards her. "Yes, I am the Falcon."

"Wow." Christa stood there, for a moment, and reflected upon her life. "I should've made a bucket list. I could've checked a hell of a lot of stuff off."

"Who else have you met? And you're here why, exactly?" the man asked, seemingly unphased by her sarcastic comment.

Christa gave a small sigh. Well, it wouldn't hurt to tell him, would it? "Well, for a formerly pretty dang normal teenage girl, quite a few people. Hawkeye, Black Widow, Pepper Potts... oh, yeah, and Tony Stark, who just so happens to be my dad."

Falcon's mouth dropped open in a perfect comical O. He looked like he was trying to say something, but all that came out were half-hearted gasp-like sounds and the beginning of a raised and pointed finger.

"Sorry, what were you trying to say? I'm, like, eighty percent deaf right now. Literally," said Christa sarcastically.

As it turned out, however, the guy had no need to speak, because moments later, a door that looked like a wall opened up to Christa's right, and out stepped two oddly familiar figures.

The man--tall, heavily muscled, shoulder-waist ratio of a Dorito, dirty-blond hair on his head and in a handsome, patriotic swoop at the front, bright blue eyes practically gleaming like the sun in the bright light of the room, hands at his belt, body in a position of authority and "where's the danger at" that Christa felt her heart stop at.

This guy was the epitome of hot.

For once in her lifetime, Christa was lost for words. She had been in utter awe of this particular Avenger since she was a child, always begging her mother to go to the museum if only to see pictures of his beautiful face (and... learn about history... she guessed...), and the only action figure she'd ever purchased or received was one of him, and she'd tried to replicate his shield more times than one--and though that schoolgirl crush had been long gone--

That man before her was absolutely beautiful.

The man didn't appear to notice her staring, or maybe he just pretended not to (he was probably used to it at this point, body like that). Instead, he turned to look at the Falcon guy standing nearby.

"Who is this?" he asked.

Before the man in the winged suit could respond, however, Christa stuttered, "Y-you're Captain America."

The man gave a small smile. "That I am. And you're a teenager in the Avengers Facility. I thought they weren't doing tours until after winter break?"

Wow, the man with a plan could be witty. "Th-they aren't. I'm--"

But Christa didn't finish her sentence very quickly, so Falcon did it for her.

"She's Tony Stark's daughter, apparently," he put in. He seemed to be trying to become less shocked, or showing himself that way at least, but failing slightly.

Christa cleared her throat, cleared her head a little, stood up a little straighter. "Unfortunately, I am."

The Captain tilted his head slightly. "And what do they call you?"

"Lord, or queen, depending on what mood I'm in." Finally, a clever comeback. Instead of all that stuttering. Gosh, that stuttering was horribly embarrassing, now she thought back to it. But she didn't show it, of course.

"I see you got your father's sense of humor."

Really? Perhaps it was true.

"I guess I had to get something from him, because it sure as hell wasn't my pretty face."

Surprisingly enough, Steve Rogers gave a small chuckle. Christa couldn't help but give a little grin to herself.

"All right, everyone, I want to get back to training, so let's hurry this up." The words came from the woman a few steps behind Steve, the voice with a lilting accent Christa could now determine as Sokovian. Her auburn hair glinted in the light as she walked forward. Turning to Christa, she asked, "What is your actual name?"

Christa looked at her. Who was she? She didn't pay much attention to most of the superheros, especially as of late. But something told her she recognized her from somewhere (likely the internet, because despite the fact that she didn't actually go looking for news on the Avengers, it often popped up). "What's yours?"

"Wanda Maximoff," the woman (or was she a woman? She looked almost like a teenager, though definitely older than Christa herself) said. Her voice sounded slightly wary, as though she wasn't quite sure she trusted the girl.

"I'm Christa Amory," Christa finally obliged to tell them. "And you can all trust me, I promise. Well, on second thought, probably not all the time, but it's not like I'm a member of HYDRA. I'm just here for a paternity test with dear old daddy-o."

"And you landed in the obstacle course," said Wanda, her voice mistrustfully scoffing.

Christa raised her hands in a shrug. "What? I didn't mean to end up in here. I was looking for Stark's office!"

"That's on the floor above," said Steve. (Awe, that voice. It was like the perfect mix between manly and chocolate.) "And this room is supposed to be highly protected. No one except those with the highest clearance know the pass codes, especially not for an opening into the middle of the ATTETP. How did you get in here?"

Must've looked at the map wrong, Christa thought, a little frustrated with herself for getting it so incorrect. Ah, well, that thing was confusing. And she got to meet three Avengers. More than most teenagers could say, she was absolutely positive. In response to Steve's words, she quipped, "I'm just so good with technology, it's like the technology is under my control." Ha, wouldn't that be a fun power to have?

Steve looked at her for a moment, obviously thinking hard. Perhaps debating as to what to do with her.

After a moment, he straightened his back, cleared his throat, and said, "Why don't we escort you back to your father?"

"I don't think he feels like seeing me, Cap," Christa replied.

"Why? Did you barge in on him while he was just doing what he was ordered to?" Falcon asked.

Christa looked him right in the eye. "That is exactly correct, Birdie. Barging in on people's lives is one of my many talents, as you can see."

Buzz. Buzz. Buzzzzzzz.

Christa pulled her phone out of her pocket to see the name Sir Arrows and the call symbol on it. She answered and put the phone to her right (and currently only usable) ear and said, "Avengers residence. Got any problems with aliens, robots, or birds? We can solve it."

"Christa, where are you?"

"Hanging out with your buddies. And man, did you know--" Christa said sarcastically.

"Christa, they got the results from the blood test back." The tone to his voice was almost serious. Huh. Weird.

"That fast? Wow, what year is it, 2085?"

"Christa."

"Yeah?"

"The test results were negative."