****

"The feeling that I'm losing her forever
And without really entering her world"

- ABBA

****

      Lloyd isn't sure why he kept the de-aging potion.

      He'd confiscated it from a criminal after interrupting an illegal trade. He was supposed to report it, drop it off at the police station, and never think about it again. Yet there he was, failing to do all three of those things. It was silly really, the fact that he'd brought it back with him, placed it on his desk, and wouldn't stop staring at it. It wasn't like Lloyd wanted to reverse his previous dabble in aging magic. He'd lived too much of his life to ever go back, and so much of it he loved. But every now and then, Lloyd is reminded of how much he'd lost. He thinks of the years that had been snatched from him; the innocence and the childhood. Then, for only a moment, the famed green ninja, hero of the realm, resents the pressure that had been placed onto his young, naive self. He rages against the danger that follows him into his dreams and mourns for the peaceful life he could've lived if he'd just... stayed small.

      Maybe the weight on his shoulders wouldn't be so heavy.
      Maybe the loss wouldn't have been so great.
      Maybe his life could have been more... normal.

      The bottle continued to sit there (as inanimate objects tend to do). Lloyd sat there too, eyes boring into the ironically plain looking substance contemplating... well, what could he possibly be contemplating?

      Lloyd shook his head and groaned, slamming his head with a thud against his desk.

      "What are you thinking?" Lloyd muttered to himself, a sting of guilt creeping through his chest. He couldn't just abandon his responsibilities!He couldn't leave all his problems for the rest of his team to clean up. Wanted or not, the title of The Green Ninja is his to bear. No matter how unfair it was for Lloyd to have to live up to that legacy, it would be just as unfair for him to leave it for others to handle. Lloyd wasn't like his father, or his mother, or even Wu. He wasn't going to do that to anyone.

     With a sigh, Lloyd sat up again, rubbing at his all-too-tired eyes and glared back down at the potion. "You should be ashamed of yourself." He scolded.

      (Whether he was speaking to the potion or himself, Lloyd wasn't sure)

      Just as he was beginning to wonder if talking to a bottle was a sign of early onset crazy, a loud crash signalled the arrival of his teammates and his inevitable interruption. Hurriedly, Lloyd scrambled to hide the potion. Something cold and shameful twisted in his gut and he shoved the bottle into his desk drawer. In the young man's haste, he failed to notice how the glass cracked from his aggressive movements. Neither was he aware of the liquid starting to leak out onto his hand.

      "LLOYDDDD! We're back!" Jay's voice crowed. With a laugh, Lloyd got to his feet and stepped out of his room to greet his teammates.

      As the night went on, the ninja enjoyed each other's company. The day had been long for all of them, each member having to deal with their own missions. They spent the night watching a Starfarer movie, with Jay and Lloyd nerding out while Kai threw popcorn at the television and critiqued its "unrealistic premise" and "over exaggerated acting" (Ironic considering the fire ninja was an avid lover of trashy romantic dramas). Slowly, one by one, the group began to calm down. Eyes started to droop and words fell away. Zane got up to gently pry popcorn bowls from their hands and shut the television off, tucking them snuggly warm in thick blankets. Lloyd couldn't help but relax as he leaned against the couch, looking up fondly at the pile of teammates before him. The nindroid stopped at him, smiling sweetly while handing the blonde another blanket.

      "Do you not want to join them?" Zane asked.

      "Nah, I'm feeling a bit overheated and Kai burns like a furnace." Lloyd whispered, keeping his voice soft so he wouldn't rouse anyone. "Thank you, though."

      "Alright," Zane replied easily, fluffing up the thick, fuzzy blanket around his younger teammate, before joining his girlfriend on the other side of the room.

      Lloyd tucked in deeper in his blanket cocoon, smiling as snores began to rise from Cole. Kai grouchily kicked the earth ninja, muttering unpleasant words under his breath.

     "Goodnight!" Lloyd sang over to him, just to annoy the fire ninja. Rising to the bait, Kai lifted his head from Nya's shoulder to give him the stink-eye.

      "Go to sleep, you baby." He huffed.

      Lloyd huffed right back, scowling into the soft fabric of his blanket. "I'm not a baby."

      "Yes you are." Kai yawned. "A big, stupid baby."

      "Whatever." Lloyd felt his eyes start to droop. "At least I'm not... as stupid as you."

      He suddenly felt very tired with a deep pull in his limbs and mind starting to drag him under. It was like a cloak of darkness creeping around the edges of his consciousness, like a wave starting to drag him back to sea. A strange tingle seemed to ripple through his body but the green ninja was too exhausted to pay any mind. As dark spots began to dot his vision, Lloyd drifted to sleep, unbeknownst to the blanket slowly curling more and more around him...

NOTE*****

I lost someone special in my life and it's been hard to do much of anything.

But writing things just for me has helped me. :)

I hope you like this story!

LuckyBugBooks 🐞