I .... Have really gone crazy.
All the days that I can't see him, I kept thinking about him.
I looked for him at school, waited for him at canteen, library... we never run into each other during that 3 weeks.

I tried to sleep with girls.. with different body structures.
I can't.... I can't reach the climax.... I can't cum.

I tried to find a girl with short hair... quite flat chest...
I still.... can't stop thinking about him

Am I turning gay or?
It's just for sex?

Because I even jerked off while imagining him.

Now look at him sleeping in my arms fearlessly.
Not knowing I can do anything to him.
He is more  honest while he is sleeping huh?
Or is this a habit of him to hug someone while sleeping?

Does he do this to that Jun guy?
Or to that new face guy?

What's with this unpleasant feeling?
Don't tell me I'm actually... jealous?
Haha...hahah....
Impossible.

I want to try kissing him... and .... And.....
Ugh... I must be really horny lately....
Just looking at his lips and smooth skin and being touched by him....
It's making me hard down there.

"Mmmm..." he groans as he starting to wake up

"Awake?"

"Ahhh!" He quickly gets up "ah... sorry.. sunbae... I thought... I mean.. I forgot it was you.."

What do you mean it was me?
So it is true that you do sleep hugging others huh?

"It's okay.." I say and stretch... he slept on my arm and it feels numb now

"I.. I'm sorry. I will wash up first ..." he says and rushes into bathroom

He sure is more honest while drunk and sleeping
I can't probably ask him will he try to sleep with me or.. suddenly pull him into a kiss because he will just hate me more and think I'm insulting him

Do I need to get close to him first?
For real? Park Chanyeol?
Just for another guy?
I think something broke inside me. I'm going insane.
I want to sleep with him?

Byun Baekhyun avoids eyes contact.
He barely smiles at me.
He doesn't talk to me first anymore.

How to get close to him?
I need to try to kiss him and have sex with him...
Or I'm exploding with my sexual desires

———————Baekhyun's POV———————

Today we go around Jeju and enjoy our tour.

And.... Urghhhhhh
Why did I fall asleep like that?????
Hugging him?
Byun Baekhyun... you are never allowed to drink alcohol again!
Not even a sip!

Ahhhhhh.... But... why did he sleep on my bed?
Moreover... hugging me? a gay?
May be he is being sorry because of what happened ...

And.... He keeps sitting beside me, stands beside me, follows me nowwwww

Why is he doing that?!!

"Here" Sunbae gives out his hand since I'm trying to get into the small cruise for tour.

"Ah.... Thank you" I say and grab onto his hand

"It will be cold so, wear this" he says and takes out his coat for me

"No... it's okay sunbae... I have my hoodie on"

"Just wear it. You are weak to cold" He says and put it on me

Just why are you being like that...

The cruise starts moving  and fuck... it is really windy
Or I'm just weak to cold for real.

"No no .. I should go buy coffee" I mumble and go find coffee vending machine
.
.
.

Ah, there ....
Wait... I should buy one for him right?

*thinking about him offering a hand to me and giving a coat*

"Well, it's just for the coat anyway..." I say to myself

I hold two cups of coffee and head back to where he and other group members are

But, I see him talking and ... smiling with senior noona
I can't help but let out a stupid chuckle

Right... h...haha...
What was I thinking?

"Ah, colddddd" our club president says

"Aww.. here hyung" I give him an extra cup of coffee

"Aigooo... our Baekhyunee is the best" he says

"What are you two talking about?" Chanyeol sunbae walks to us

"Here sunbae" I give him back his coat and quickly walks away

That's who he is Byun Baekhyun..
You said you would stay away from him
Do as you told.

"Photo time guyssss!! Gather please!" One of the group members calls us and we all gather in getting ready for photo

"Ready !!! 1 !!!! .... 2!!!!!!"

"Gotcha" Sunbae wraps around his coat around me as he hugs me from behind

"3!!!"

He scared me... and now what?
What will be in that photo?

"Just wear this" he whispers into my ear and walks away m

What.... What was that?! *Blush*

No.... I... I didn't get a skip of heartbeat...
No Byun Baekhyun... you know what kind of person he is.

Stop being fooled.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Last dinner at Jeju huh?
Just a small BBQ again?
Yesterday too... urgh. I don't even want to smell the bbq smell.

"Baekhyunee" one of the members says

"Nae"

"Have you seen Senior Chanyeol?"

"Ah, no..."

I thought he is also here but... where is he?

"He said he will be in the room for awhile. Can you go and check Baekhyunee? He looks sick" club president says

Why me?
Nooooo

"Nae. I will"

Yeah... we are sharing a room so.
What the...he looks sick?
Or may be he is sick to socialise huh?
He not even that type to come to a trip like this.

*Phone Ringing*

B - Kris!

K - hey, are you having fun?

B - yeah kinda.. but I miss you all. Next time, let's travel together

K - of course. Jun couple and you and me. We four can go.

B - hehe... yeah. So, are you at hotel?

K - i just finished signing a contract. I bought the house. That last penthouse we went and looked.

B - ahh, that one. It's really great one right? Even tho it's quite far from our college

K - it's quite far from your house too

B - haha yeah

K - so, I'm on my way to car showroom.

B - wow!!!! You are buying car too?!

K - imm, because it's more convenient

B - rich people

K - haha. So that I can come to you and meet easily

B - ehhh.. Kris!

K - haha

I go into the hotel room and look around.. he's not on bed .

K - so are you now at hotel?

B - imm, we were having dinner

K - aww I see

Bathroom door opens and Sunbae comes out
He sees me and... yeah.. he looks sick.
Seasick?

K - Baek, tomorrow, I will come and pick you up at the airport

B - eh? At airport? It's okay I can just come back

K - let's go eat lunch together

Sunbae walks towards me and.... Anddd
He taps his forehead softly onto my forehead as he bends down a little

He's... burning upppp
He caught cold because it was cold on cruise?!

But... he's... so... close...
His breaths are even very warm...

K - Baek?

B - aww kris... okay then. Let's go.

K - imm, text me the flight info.

B - I will. I gotta go kris. See you

I quickly end the call and

"Sunbae... you are sick..." I say and check his temperature on his forehead with my palm

"Now you are looking at me in my eyes... you never made an eye contact till now... you know?"

I quickly look away and "Stop saying things like that sunbae"

Stop shaking me up....
I.... I can't stop my heartbeats now.
It's loud enough that ... I'm afraid he might hear them.
My face is red.... And it's getting hotter in this room

His body is so close to mine and.... His face....
He looks gentle... soft and ....
No.... No Baekhyun... you can't.

I won't like him again..

"Baekhyun ya"

"...Nae?"

"When we get back to Seoul... Please .... go watch movie with me?"

————————————————————
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