Harry pulls the white comforter up to his face to shield his phone's light from Sam, who sleeps soundly next to him. His nightly scrolls through Telegraph are a tradition now. Sam usually lays on his chest as they scroll through together, but he fell asleep early. 

Harry scrolls on his phone, smiling as he sees photos of his close friends on his timeline. He only follows a handful of people and only a handful of people follow him back. It's easier this way for Harry to control who finds him. Thankfully, he hasn't had trouble keeping a low profile on the app as most people have forgotten the name Harry Styles and surely won't know Harry Twist. 

A notification appears at the top of his screen and Harry's heart drops. 

Louis Tomlinson ✔️

Louis is typing...

Louis is typing...

Harry's heart stops in his chest and he prays it's a fake account. The verified checkmark stares back at him, proving him wrong but he doesn't want to believe it. He can't. Believing it would mean believing that Louis found him and is trying to talk to him.

Green eyes watch the screen carefully as the pop-up goes away. A white screen stares back at him. His fingers find his way to the keyboard anyway. 

Me

Leave me alone. 

Please I can't take it

He stares at the screen, unable to comprehend that he just pressed send. That he's talking to Louis for the first time in fifteen years. Seeing him was one thing. Watching the once love of life walk and breathe and live in front of him was one thing. Talking to him is another. 

Louis Tomlinson ✔️

I wasn't going to say anything, I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that. I found your old jacket and I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry for bothering you. 

Harry puts his phone down, Louis' words replaying themself in his head over and over. If he focuses, he can hear Louis saying them. He can hear every inflation of his voice. 

Sam rustles next to him. He can't do this. As quietly as possible, Harry moves the comforter to the side and slides out of the bed. Wooden floorboards creak underneath him as he tiptoes out of the room and outside. 

The fresh air, real fresh air, calms him. As soon as Harry steps out on their porch he feels at peace. Grasshoppers chirp and a gentle wind blows, filling the air with quiet music. Stars shine bright in the sky, reliable and dependent. Harry forces in two more deep breaths before he opens his phone again and looks at the message. 

Me

The concert was a mistake. 

I'm sorry for starting it.

Have a good life

If only Harry had the heart to tell Sam he didn't want to go. Maybe then all these old emotions would've stayed buried. 

Louis Tomlinson ✔️

Can we talk? I know you probably don't, but I just want to hear you one last time and I'll say goodbye. I want to apologize too. You deserve that. No pressure. 

The phone number stares up at Harry, almost daring him to press it. Daring him to hear what Louis has to say. He doesn't need to hear Louis apologize, or maybe he does. He doesn't think he needs it, but maybe it's one of those things you don't think you need until you have it. 

His heart hammers as he presses the phone number. Immediately, his stomach sinks as he hears the ringing coming from his phone. Numbly, he brings the phone to his ear and presses it there. It only rings twice before Louis picks up. 

"You picked up."

This is a bad idea. Harry's hands start to shake and his stomach knots into two as he hears Louis' voice for the first time in ages. It's deeper than before and it sounds pained. The three words tell so much. 

He's a little drunk, Harry can tell that much. He's tired too, Harry can tell by the little sigh he added after he finished talking. The worst, Harry can tell that he's been smoking, his voice has a gruffness that it didn't have before Harry left. He recognizes it as a smoker's gruff after being around smokers so often now. 

"Don't make this harder than it needs to be," Harry sighs, barely able to keep himself together. A part of Harry prays that Louis doesn't know him as well as Harry knows Louis. Maybe after all these years, Louis' forgotten. Maybe then he won't know how hard Harry's trying to stay calm. 

Out of nowhere, Harry feels Daisy's soft fur against his hand. Usually, his dog sleeps upstairs next to Sam, but Harry guesses she must have heard Harry come down. Quietly, she grumbles next to Harry, understanding that he's upset about something. 

"Is that a dog?" 

"Yeah," Harry breathes. Daisy crawls into Harry's lap and lays there. Painted nails run through her black fur soothingly. "Her name's Daisy."

"I thought you were always a cat person."

"I am, but Sam likes dogs," Harry explains. He can hear Louis' voice hitch at the sound of Sam's name. 

"Sam, is he good to you," Louis asks quietly. 

Harry thinks of his sleeping fiance upstairs and how he's probably waiting for Harry to come back up and join him. He thinks about how sweet Sam has always been. Ever since the beginning, Sam has been Harry's number one supporter.

"He is," Harry whispers. "Uh... what about you?" Harry feels a tear race down his cheek. Hastily, he wipes it away. 

"Me? Nobody, my heart already belongs to someone."  

There's a beat of silence where neither of them says anything. Silent tears make their way down Harry's cheeks. Deep down, Harry knows that a part of his heart will be with Louis too and that hurts the most. He hates that will never be able to give his whole heart to Sam. Sam deserves it, he deserves all of Harry's heart, but there's a tiny piece that isn't Harry's to give. 

"Look at us," Louis laughs painfully. 

"Look at us," Harry sniffles back as he wipes at his eyes again. 

"Thank you, I- didn't realize how much I missed your voice." Harry has to press his eyes closed to keep from crying more. 

"Louis," Harry whispers, his voice shaking. He doesn't know how much longer he can take this. 

"I like how you say my name. You nearly lost your accent, but when you say my name it sounds like it used to." 

"I should go to bed, it's late," Harry replies because he doesn't know what else to say. 

"Alright, that's alright. I hope you sleep well." 

"Alright," Harry sighs. Harry's about to take the phone from his ear when he hears Louis again.

"Can you say my name again... just one more time. For the road," Louis asks. Harry can hear the pain laced in his voice. 

"Louis... I have to go," Harry whispers. He pulls the phone away from his ear before Louis has the chance to say anything. The call ends quickly and as soon as it does, sobs rake over Harry's body. 

He doesn't know how long he cries outside. It could've been hours or minutes. The moon sits high in the sky and the stars still twinkle. Harry makes himself wait until his hands stop shaking before returning to his bedroom. 

Sam doesn't move as Harry climbs back into bed and pulls the comforter tight around him. Harry doesn't have the energy to plug his phone in either, which he'll surely regret in the morning. 

"Hmm, you've been crying," Sam asks quietly. His arms wrap around Harry's shoulder and he presses a quick kiss to Harry's back. 

Harry sniffs once, "Just a runny nose, go back to bed." 

~_~_~

Hey guys! Another update. I've decided I'm going to update this book once we hit certain vote and comment goals. I got 124 reads on my last chapter but only 10 votes and 5 comments. So, before I update this book again I would like to get at least: 

15 votes

15 comments

This should be easy since there's a lot of people who are reading the chapters. Please try and make the comments engaging and about something. Feel free to leave your thoughts on the chapter or what will happen next! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy! ~B