The Christmas season was joyous, and there were tons of gatherings and drinking, though I did not touch a drop of alcohol for the time being. I did not want to be caught in a compromising situation again and not know how or what happened. I wanted to be fully sober until this entire thing blows over.

As the New Year came closer, my nerves were also getting worse. It may not be the first of January yet, but I was more than sure that there was a surprise waiting, and it would be the death of us if we did not prepare for it.

Jaxx and I spent almost the entirety of the twenty-sixth talking and planning our solution and strategizing our next best options. He was outraged, but he understood what I had done. It was my analysis, and he had no reason to believe I would say something like that for any ulterior motives. We owned the company, and he knew that the company would fall without either one of us.

"Can't believe that son of a bitch did that. That lying little bitch, and that son of a bitch. And that other SOB. All of them are SOBs!" Jaxx shook his head as he stared at the laptop. The anger in his eyes had subsided, and his breathing had steadied. The cloud of fury sitting atop his head had dissipated, though he still clenched his jaw.

"Merry Christmas. Here's to trusting people." I pushed my mug of hot cocoa against the glass of whiskey he was nursing. It had been a long year and an even longer December. But it was not long enough. January was right around the corner, and we weren't ready for it yet. My heart wasn't.

"I have something else to tell you," I said, still undecided.

"I'm all ears, man," he said. There was a long pause. I didn't want him involved in the mess, but he had to know if I would end up dead. Besides, we were going to be dealing with Beau.

"I have a copy of the security footage from the Blitz."

He stared blankly at me like a hanging application. Then, he blinked. "Excuse me?"

"I said, I have a copy—"

"Why do you have a copy? When did you get it? Shit, Ace, how long have you been keeping it?" I raised a hand to stop the questions.

"I got it from Sheryl," I said.

"Who?"

"Last year."

"What?"

"Just before I escaped to Milieu. That's why I left because I saw one of the files, and my mind just went haywire."

That, then Brigs came, and then Jacob happened. Again.

"Ace, you idiot!" he growled. "You haven't answered any of my questions!"

"I believe I answered the 'who' and 'when.'"

"But you haven't answered why and the how long!  Why have you been keeping it all this time?"

I heaved another sigh before telling him the truth about Sheryl's visit and how she deliberately dropped the pen drive. And because I was a curious cat, I watched 'one,' panicked, and left the city.

"I did not want you guys involved; that's why I didn't tell you. And I really did not think I needed to tell anyone. Maybe I could just pretend I didn't have it, you know?"

"Ace, that's evidence to the homicide! If Beau knows you have it, then he's going to kill you! God, for someone so smart, you're being an exceedingly dumb little shit right now," he groaned as he rubbed his face with both hands.

"Gee, I'm so touched with the heartfelt thanks I get for trying to protect my best friend. You're welcome," I deadpanned.

"Do you have a death wish or something? Come on, man!" This time, he threw a throw pillow at me.

"Wait, so if you watched the footage, who is the last guy they were talking about?" he questioned.

"I only watched one of the four camera recordings. I couldn't see the guy's face from the camera angle."

"We have to watch the rest. We have to find out who the last guy is," Jaxx said, determined.

"I knew I shouldn't have told you."

"What? Why? Don't you want to know the entire truth?"

"I already saw it in one footage. It was either Beau or the admiral who shot the mayor. Carlo and the rest are innocent. There was no struggle. I don't have to see 'the truth' from all angles just to be reminded of how the homicide happened. Thank you very much."

"Give me a copy then. I'll watch it for you. We need to find the last guy."

"Why?"

"Because he's also in danger."

"And we need to help him because? Jaxx, we're not their saviors."

"No, but he could be the person who could save Carlo and Greggy. Ace, if the last guy is alive and is willing to testify, then you could save them. Otherwise, their blood is also in your hands. Sheryl gave you a copy, asking for your help. I have no idea why it had to be you, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't random. Especially given your history."

"Exactly. So why would I help them, Jaxx? Tell me. After all that they did – they framed and almost killed me and even had the gall to file a suit to make the entire shit believable – do they deserve even an ounce of sympathy from me?"

"Ace, bro. I understand. It's really too much to ask. But you already saw what's inside. You know the truth, Ace. Doesn't it bother you that you sleep soundly at night while three other innocent people are just waiting for their deaths like sitting ducks?"

"Do I feel bad that I have a copy of the evidence? Yes. Do I feel guilty about not telling anyone about it? No. Do I give a fuck about what will happen to Carlo? No."

"Ace, surely you don't mean that. You're not that kind of guy," he chuckled disbelievingly.

"Maybe I do, and maybe I am that kind of guy, Ben. I'm not the loving, endlessly forgiving, happy-go-lucky, innocent Ace I was before the assault happened. I have to live with the scars. And I can't have a normal life because there are so many things I cannot enjoy anymore because of what they did.

"I cannot watch an MMA bout without puking my guts out because each slap of flesh, every bone-crunching sound, every painful groan reminds me of my own fight for life. You call me delicate, but did you think I enjoy being pathetic?

"You know how I used to like giving out and getting hugs, how physically affectionate I was. But now, I am disgusted by unwarranted physical advances because it reminds me of their hands grabbing and groping and pinning me down, as if it was I who was with her that night.

"Fuck, I can't even stand seeing men only in towels because it still sickens me! Something so mundane, so trivial, and yet it disturbs me. It has been twelve years, Ben. But I cannot live a normal life because they ruined my head.

"So tell me, oh brave, all-wise and valiant Benedict Jackson. Why the hell should I lift a finger?" my eyes stung as I heaved.

The words I spat tasted bitter, like the bile rising to my throat. Hatred, abhorrence, rage, and resentment, all of the feelings swirled in my head and settled heavily in my chest. They were like poison living inside me, filling my veins each time my heart pumped.

They broke me. Carlo, Sheryl, and Franco. All these years, I wanted justice. I wanted them to pay dearly for what they have done. Not just for the physical injuries but more for the psychological agony I've suffered.

"After twelve long years later, revenge came knocking at my door. It's practically in my hands. I did not lift a finger. I did not have to do any dirty work for it to land on my lap and beg me to take it.

"What do I have to do to get my sweet revenge? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. So why the hell should I trouble myself doing something if it meant quelling my chance on retribution?" I chuckled humorlessly.

Silence enveloped us. Whatever Carlo got himself into, he deserved. If he was going to jail or be killed, that was none of my business. If the evidence did not get to me, he would end up dead anyway. And surely, if I get involved, I would also end up dead. So why should I go out on a limb to help him? So he'll live, and I will die? 

"I'm really sorry, Ace. I wish I could say I know how you feel, but I don't. If you won't do it because of Carlo, at least do it for Greggy and for the last guy, whoever he is. They're innocent. I don't mean to belittle what you've been through, but at least you got to live," he persuaded.

"If the ROTC officers didn't get there, I might not have gotten out of there alive."

He sighed, conflicted. I knew he wanted to help, but I couldn't.

"I don't think I can do it, Ben. There's still too much anger in me," I admitted. "I don't want to be the one dead because I tried saving the asshole. I don't even want to save him. He deserves at least that."

"Then, let me do it. I know the truth anyway. I just have to see it with my own eyes. Give me a copy of the files," he said resolutely.

"Why? You don't owe any of them anything, Jaxx. Why are you risking your life?"

"Because it's the right thing to do, Ace. And I have a feeling this isn't only about Carlo. I think the Camacho brothers are also asking Sheryl for help to save Greggy. Why else would they record their conversation with Beau and give it to her?"

"I thought their families don't see eye to eye?"

"Alvaro and Greggy's parents don't see eye to eye. Leon and Manolo love Greggy like a brother. Thus, I wouldn't be surprised that they'd want to save him but are afraid to use their resources lest their father finds out and include them in the body count. You heard the guy. He wouldn't hesitate to kill his own son if he got in the way."

"But how do the Camachos know Sheryl? And if they wanted me to hear that, why wouldn't they just send the recording to you?" I was still confused as to how the people and their intentions linked together for this shit to end up on my plate.

"Franco Ferazzini is their connection, through CFG. I don't think they meant for the recording to get to us, but Sheryl thought better. Since she wanted your help, why not give you intel about a business deal with the devil, right? Then maybe you'd help.

"If Leon wanted my help, I think he would have asked me from the start. I don't think he knows that I know," Jaxx said.

"Do they really want me dead? Have they not done enough? Aren't they afraid that I'll actually fuck them over and let them die?" I groaned, frustrated that I still could not find the logic behind Sheryl's actions.

"That's a risk she's willing to take. But that only means that you are involved in this clusterfuck, even though right now, you have no idea how."

"What? I haven't had contact with them since after the court hearings. I don't know who Greggy is, or how Alvaro is working with Beau. And Beau only came to me last December. Sheryl asked for my help as early as June or July, if I remember correctly. How the hell am I connected to them?" I roared and repeatedly pounded on the sofa, exasperated.

"I think we need to find out who the fourth guy is," he replied.

"Noooo..." I covered my face with the throw pillow he threw earlier.

"There's no other connection I can see right now."

"What if it's some random guy I still don't know? What do I do then?"

"What if it's someone you know? Doesn't Harris play poker?"

I shut my eyes. It was a possibility that I didn't see. I was dreading the chance that Jaxx might be right. "God, I hate you so much right now, Jaxx. So much!"

"I'm just throwing it out there. Maybe that's why Sheryl was brazen enough to ask you for help because if you knew that Harris was involved, you would go to the ends of the earth to help him."

"Fuck you and your logic, Benedict," I glared. He merely chuckled and handed me my cocoa.

"God, I can't believe we still celebrated Christmas as if nothing happened. Maybe it's not Harris. He's even holding a party with his friends tonight," I said.

"Do you think he'll tell you that he's in trouble? What if he doesn't want you to know that he's on their death list?"

"Jaxx, will you please shut up?" I clenched my fists. He laughed.

 I would have appreciated his insight any other day. But with the current circumstances, his astuteness was irritating me. 

"Have you talked to Jake?" he asked, breaking the comfortable peace that rested between us.

"Nope. Just texted him a 'Merry Christmas,' and that's it. I didn't pick up his calls. I'm not ready to listen, Jaxx. You know how easily I get swayed," I gave him a piteous glance.

Looking down on my cocoa, most of the marshmallows had disappeared, and there were only two small ones left bobbing. It was a difficult decision, but I knew it was time to accept it. It was time to give Jaxx his answers.

"You easily get swayed only with people you care about deeply, Ace." 

His statement was indirectly direct. Stupid son of a bitch always knew what to say. As if everything he said tonight wasn't enough, he had to hit this one right in the bull's eye.

Therefore, I gave him a vague yet clear answer. Giving tangentially spot-on answers was what we did best.

"Yeah," I just gave a humorless chuckle and continued to stare at my drink. I didn't dare look at him. I could not. "So, sue me."

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