BAUCHI STATE, NIGERIA.

"You are so cute when you grin like that." Mahnoor tickled her three months old baby boy Aasim and he giggled some more at the sound of her voice and wide smile.

She left him in the crib to get dressed in simple grey maxi dress with a belt around her waist. Tying her hair in a low bun, she went to the crib to find him sleeping peacefully and she grinned before going to her bed to take his baby monitor button. Her phone rang, it showed Asad's name, a smile promptly spread across her face as she picked the call.

"I'm in your house. I'm looking for a book and it should be in Aman's study." He explained without pleasantries, that is how close they've become for the past many months. He's started detaching himself from her once upon a time but it seems like the pull is dragging him right back to square one just like it is doing to her.

Biting her lower lip, she stared at herself in the vanity mirror before walking out of the room knowing fully well she is not closing her hair. She is just tempted to do something brazen and quench down what is really wrong with her that she doesn't know. She's discussed it with Maha and she said the same loneliness she's felt before falling pregnant is the same thing that is happening but Mahnoor didn't believe her. This is different type of loneliness, she is not craving a man's attention but a companion's and Asad happens to be that one person she needs at the moment.

The other hand that is not holding the device gripped the ribbon holding her hair and she let them fall loosely all over her back, the luscious tresses bounced in curly volume.

"Let me help you look for it." She whispered into the phone as she stood in front of the library she's entered only once or twice in search of romantic books she couldn't find and ceded.

She opened the door and entered. The room is empty except for the walnut two shelves facing one another with a few books arranged alphabetically, a huge carob desk with glass top and dark swivel chairs one at the head and two in front. There is also a tortilla Knole couch by the further end facing the desk. Apart from these pieces of furniture, the room is practically empty then the eye catching paintings —Renaissance— across the walls. Her footsteps were swallowed by the Persian wool wall to wall carpet beneath her feet as she sauntered to the room.

Asad stood before one of the shelves browsing through the book he wants to find but he's felt her presence in the room just didn't turn around to acknowledge her. "Stop walking like a thief in your own home." His voice is light, filled with humor like always.

She smiled, tucked her phone beneath a book on the table and lean her hip against it even with the threat of her height. "I'm not sneaking in. I don't want to disturb your search."

"Hmm." He hmmed, his eyes and hands moving one volume to another but the book he is looking for isn't there from the looks of things so he pivoted to check the other shelf but his eyes landed on her.

He halted at the sight of her hair. He's obviously seen it once or twice when he would walk in while she is not pleasant looking, that happened once, and when he took her to the hospital during her labour. But now that she is all decked up in her maxi dress that tightened around the bosom and waist then flowed to her ankles in waves, it's entirely a different story. He swallowed hard before looking at the shelf above her head, schooling his expression back to that charming one.

"The book should be around this shelf or he's lost it." He murmured, ferrying to the other end of the room completely ignoring the debonair and stellar sight he's seen.

Mahnoor didn't feel any tinge at his nonchalance since she's seen it in his eyes. She doesn't know why she is doing this herself but something within her has snapped and all she could think about is working with the ignorant side of her skull that might lead to her doom. She watched him, her hands crossed underneath her breasts with pointed concentration. Her thoughts are hazy and foggy, she cannot see anything clear except what she's set in mind so she forced her feet to stay beneath the rug under her feet or she regrets her next move.

He stood before the shelf for a few minute before she said. "Should I help you? You are taking forever over there. What's the title of the book?"

Strolling to where he is, she stood beside him, her scent wafting through his nose but he didn't react to that too. He looked down at her with a mocking smile that made her heart flip and stomach to fill up with butterfly. She buried her toes beneath the soft rug, they are curling like a purring cat's. Her stomach quivered with unknown feeling with the way his eyes are sizing her up albeit the look on his face saying different story, his eyes aren't lying. This man here likes her like she does him, they are in danger.

When she thought he wouldn't answer her, he jeered. "No offense to your height but this shelf is twice you height."

She scowled at that then humphed before hurrying to the couch and sit down in pretense that he's offended her when in reality, her knees are buckling like jelly beneath her and any minute she'd genuflect. What on earth is this? Why the sudden wanton nature? Her heart is beating too loud making it hard for her to hear. She didn't hear his footsteps, only the sight of his Italian leather shoes as they stand in front of her before he sat himself opposite her giving a good distance between them.

"Are you mad at me now?" His voice is laced with confusion. He's been through those mood swings during her pregnancy so it's now normal for him to ask whether things are good between them.

Mahnoor set her mouth in a moue and frowned like a cute bratty child then look at him through those captivating eyes that made his breath caught and his stomach to harden. "I'm not mad but when people talk about my height like this especially from a close friend —"

He locked her mouth with his before she could finish her sentence and her eyes widened in astonishment for a few seconds before she closed her dainty eyes and relish the pressure of his lips against hers. Asad was distracted by the sight of her mouth... the luscious, silky, pink lips made for sin that seemed to promise unspeakable aspartame. The scent of her invaded his nose repeatedly, in luxurious drifts that roused a fresh wave of fantastically lurid urges within his body.

Mahnoor realized that she wanted him with a desperation that frightened her. The pressure of his lips floated lightly over hers, straying briefly to her chin, her cheek, leaving trails of soft fire wherever they ventured, before he returned to her mouth with more explicit pressure that weakened her knees and made her toes curl so hard she heard the sound of her cartilage tweaking in a clavichord tone. Her head swarm with multitude and plethora of butterflies making her dizzy with desire for more of what he is giving her.

His hands are moving around her whole back, she raised her hand to place them against his neck when they heard powerful footsteps coming their way. They pushed each other away, Asad stood up and made it to the other end of the room where a shelf is located just in time for the door to be pushed open by no one other than his younger brother and her husband. Their hearts are beating too fast for them to think clearly so none of them paid much attention to him. Mahnoor is trying to get her breath back in place before she checks on whoever it is that interrupted them.

God, they would've made a grave mistake had this interruption not occur. What have I done? She muttered beneath her breath, clearing the haziness clouding her senses.

What would they have done? Make love there on the couch while her housemaids are moving around the house like bunch of ferrets? Her son sleeping idly in his crib while his mother fornicates? Oh, she wouldn't have been able to face anyone again in her entire life. She sighed deeply in gratefulness then rose her head to see who's got such powerful footsteps to stop them from their rendezvous. Her eyes widened slightly in galvanization at the sight of her husband, Aman.

The man she's just cheated on with his older brother in his own home!

Shame enveloped her rawly. Her cheeks burn in embarrassment even though she is sure he hasn't seen them but still knowing what she's done to him is enough to make her chest and cheeks burn. She managed to school her expression into that of utter blankness, he cannot see a thing in her eyes, not even the guilt and shame slowly eating up her intestines.

Asad cleared his throat from the other end. "Bro, you didn't tell me you were coming back few hours sooner than the time you've said."

Aman transferred his eyes to Asad and away from Mahnoor with a gentle smile that showed no sign of suspicion which means he trusts his brother enough to see him alone with his wife and not suspect a thing. She almost scoffed at the irony. He wouldn't care anyway. He told her to do that exact same thing she is doing that earned him a slap. She is being a hypocrite, she realized with a blanched expression.

She is just the woman he was forced to get married to and nowhere near the woman he would've chosen for himself had he been given the chance. Who knows whether he has another wife there in Portland? Because how could a man leave his family and go to another country for a whole year without a call back? She is suspecting something about her husband.

Oh, that's the guilt talking. Now she wants to put the blame on him for whatever he's done but she cannot help it. He gave her a taste and left her thirsty for many months, she needs to result to something. The bloody man had to propose that weird suggestion to her months ago. She would've gone through with it with his brother had it not being for his presence, fortunately. She would've stooped to his level and there won't be any difference between them.

How she loathes this man now with every pore and fiber in her body!

Aman moved forward and gave his brother a brotherly hug. "Maybe I didn't tell you the time correctly. I was supposed to land here few minutes ago but had to stop to give something to Fadwa."

Asad pulled away with knitted brows. "Hope there is nothing wrong with her? She's been complaining for the past few days about everything and nothing. I just hope she is not pregnant again."

With a shrug, Aman gave him a knowing glance that he should know by now their sisters are baby producing machines. Asad groaned, shaking his head with a chortle. He refused to let his eyes fall on Mahnoor who stood awkwardly at the end of the room. When it's confirmed that Aman won't talk to her, she quietly left the room without as much as a glance back at her husband.

Asad frowned, how could he have done that to his brother? But above all else, why is Aman not talking to his wife now? "Why didn't you talk to her? She's been lonely for how many months now and you can't even acknowledge her?"

Aman raised a mocking brow with a huff. "Why didn't she acknowledge me as her husband? It's not my duty to greet her after coming back from another country. I'm the one who's travelled, not her."

"You're a hopeless cause. This adolescence and mentality of yours is beyond me." Asad rolled his eyes and continue searching this business book his brother had hidden somewhere around.

The next few days passed in a blur. She continued to live her life like Aman is not back home but refuse to see Asad even after countless of calls. She could easily sneak out and meet with him somewhere in the manor but she doesn't want to. She is afraid of what she might find out from him. Maybe he doesn't like her or he likes her but there is nothing they can do about it. Either way, she is not ready to hear neither the good or the bad news, she'd rather stay neutral and hold onto that loving kiss they'd shared that flew with sparks.

She curled herself in a ball as the feeling of fear made her shiver again. She's been feeling that sort of way since the arrival of Aman back in the house. There is something that is definitely going to turn out wrong with his presence in the house but she is not sure what that is. The air is thick with tension, something she's never felt her entire life and thought people are exaggerating it when they talk about it but she felt it too now.

Her baby lie beside her watching her with keen wide eyes. She smiled at him, sending more energy in the atmosphere but she didn't dive deep into it. Instead of wallowing inside her room, she picked up her phone and called Fadwa to tell her she is coming to her home now so they can talk about something and she agreed.

Changing into an A-line tangerine gown featuring bishop sleeves and scoop neckline, she dressed Aasim into something better too before asking Nana to talk to the driver about her sudden departure. Brushing her child's hair, she tied her veil right around her head with pins so it won't fall off with the breeze outside that is unforgiving. Her son is tucked in many towels and sweaters so as to not feel the chill outside and end up with cold, she cannot deal with that now.

She left her room and met Aman sitting at the dining room scrolling through his phone, she didn't say a thing to him and left the house. Like always. He's never asked to see their son or even take him from Nana or Ummi when they are playing outside. She will always swallow hard at the thought and feel like murdering him in cold blood. How could a father be this cruel? She is really close to telling her father all she is going through and if Asad wants to replace his brother, she will be more than glad.

There is nothing in this world that will bring the love she's had for Aman back into her heart. He's yanked it away and trampled on it with his own feet and barehands. Not calling her after finding out she is pregnant didn't hurt as much but ignoring their child is the last straw. That is the last pain she will endure from Aman. She will make sure this knot is untied through thick or thin, she is done with him.

Her phone pinged in her hand with a message from Asad.

"We need to talk and you know it. Stop avoiding me please. It's killing me. I need to see you and talk to you."

Mahnoor shook her head, she won't be lured. She wants things to stay the way they are and everyone should find his way around life before they settle on what to do. For now, she needs to confide her problems with another person and see if she is the only crazy one or not. Whether are emotions and feelings are natural or unnatural. She is on the brink of going cuckoo and the type that won't take it easy on her. She will be taken to psychiatry and her son will pay the hugest price of all.

Arriving at Fadwa's two story building, her eyes stared at the eggshell shades before the driver opened the door for her thinking she was waiting for him. With an apologetic smile, she took her large tote bag that's filled with Aasim's baby stuff and dismounted the car. She sauntered to the house with the help fo the driver holding the bag for her when he realized that she is holding way too many things and the baby's health shouldn't be risked by her chivalrousness.

"You really look disturbed and disheveled. What could be the problem?" Fadwa commented, ferrying out from her kitchen with a large tray ladened with plates. Samosa, spring rolls and donuts filled it up with chilled sprite.

Mahnoor sighed, adjusted Aasim on the couch then surrounded him with throw pillows so he won't fall off. "There are so many things wrong with me and I've never told anyone about it, not even my mother."

Now Fadwa is more than curious about what is wrong with this young mother. It's totally okay for a new young mother to go through all those postpartum disasters and catastrophes which includes more emotions than any other thing. She's been through that too but Mahnoor's story looks different and a bit more complicated.

With a sigh again, Mahnoor sat down on the carpeted floor close to her son to watch over him, not trusting the pillows to do the job her eyes and hand can.

"We all don't know the reason behind my marriage with Aman right?" Thinking she was going to tell her about the mystery behind the sudden marriage, Fadwa nodded hastily. "Well, I don't know either. I just agreed to the marriage knowing whatever my parents do is for the best for me because they love me more than their own lives and I trust all their decisions blindly. I waited for a whole year to see my husband. No phone call, any source of communication. Heck, I didn't even know his face the whole time. I would've been married to an old man and I wouldn't have known.

"Then Aman came back. I thought things were going to fall into place but no, reality hit me hard. Life is not all roses and red, it's also filled with thorns. Aman didn't show no sign of affection whatsoever. He regarded me as an annoying housemate he wants to get rid of but cannot because he is broke to pay the whole house rent." She shrugged her shoulders at Fadwa's frown.

"We live like housemates for the first few days before I approached him with the matter of... you know, what married couple do." She flushed uneasily but Fadwa only encouraged her to go on and she continued, telling her all about her horrid experiences with her younger brother.