(This is literal shit, but I enjoyed writing it, so sorry...)

Peter was innocently sleeping on August 10. Today of all days. How can this boy sleep as much as he does? Let alone sleep in on his birthday! Time to wake him up and get this party started.

"Happy birthday Peter, you're the ugliest of all. You are the worst and most perverse to roam Midtown's hallowed halls. Your mother was a hooker and your father was a dick. He poked her in the toaster and the pair produced a pig. Whose brain is awfully tiny and whose ass is awfully big. Happy birthday, bitch! Happy birthday, bitch! Happy birthday, Peter! Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch!" Rachael sang/yelled Ivy's birthday song from Bare, bouncing up and down on top of him. She shook him awake accidentally hitting her elbow on her bed frame.

He had woken up before she'd even decided to wake him up he's just been too lazy to get up. Her song made him laugh before he even got to open his eyes. "Can you not? I was sleeping."

"It's your birthday there's no sleeping on your birthday!" Rachael smiles, sitting back on his lap to make sure he couldn't try to go back to sleep.

"I think that's all you're supposed to do on your birthday." Peter laughs.

"I respectfully disagree." Rachael says with a bit of darkness flashing in her eyes.

"Okay, JD." Peter says playfully rolling his eyes at her obscure Heathers reference. He did almost a sit up to get level with her kissing the tip of her nose before falling back on his side of her bed. "It's nine-thirty in the morning and you've already quoted two musicals. You have a problem."

"Yeah, Yeah." Rachael says mockingly. "That's besides the point."

"What is the point?" Peter chuckles.

"That it's your birthday!" Rachael smiles throwing her arms in the air ready to continue her song. "Happy birthday Peter, you're pretty as a boy can be. You gave the boys gonorrhea, now they burn for you each time they pee"

"Wow, that's such a lovely song to wake up to..." Peter teases. "Thanks."

"You're welcome-" Rachael starts, Peter immediately shushed her by putting his finger over her lips.

"Please no, PG 13 version Heathers songs on my birthday." Peter says, removing his hands.

"You're right Blue was better, they shouldn't have replaced it." Rachael says.

Peter just smiled at her like wait a minute why am I dating this theatre nerd? And when did I start understanding her references and agreeing with her opinions on them.

"Anyway...It's your seventeenth birthday!" Rachael smiles.

"Do not start singing Seventeen." Peter warns.

"Oh fine." Rachael huffs getting off of him and standing up. "Come on."

"Where am I coming?" Peter asks sitting up.

"To see your birthday surprise." Rachael says, pulling on his arm. "Now hurry up."

"Can I at least get dressed first?" Peter asks.

"Ugh, Fine. I guess." Rachael sighs sarcastically. "But be fast!"

"I'll make sure to take my time." Peter says starting to change as Rachael waited for him impatiently by her door. "Okay, lets go."

Rachael smiled clapping her hands as she walked out of her room with him following. "Close your eyes. Let me guide you to your birthday surprise."

"God, I can't even imagine what you're going to show me." Peter says closing his eyes and letting her drag him down the hall to the main room, using his spider-sense to make sure she didn't accidentally run him into anything.

"Okay! We've arrived at our destination." Rachael says after a minute. "Open your eyes!"

Peter did as instructed his gaze being met with a million birthday decorations hanging and plastered around the main room along with pictures of him covering the walls. "Oh my fucking God."

"That's not even the best part. We've got the fridge and pantries stocked with all of your favorite foods so I'll assume those will be gone by twelve, along with your present from me. I know my dad got you something, but I think he's saving that for later." Rachael says bouncing on her heels.

"Holy shit! How long did this take you?" Peter asks.

"All night with Johnny's help. You know I don't sleep often so that was beneficial to this event and Matchstick's sleep schedule is off because they just got back from space." Rachael says.

"This-this is great!" Peter smiles.

"Don't say that yet, the days just started I have so much more planned. Wait! Open your present!" Rachael says excitedly, running over to the main room couch, laying down on the floor and pulling a pink, paper wrapped box out from under it. She got up and handed it to him, happily.

"So you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday, to my birthday party, on my birthday with a birthday gift?" Peter jokes taking the present from her.

"I hate you." Rachael giggles, rolling her eyes.

"No you don't." Peter laughs.

"Shut up and open it before I die!" Rachael says.

"Why's it pink?" Peter whines.

"Don't act like this hurts your manly hood, pink is a boy color bitch I don't care what anyone says." Rachael says rolling her eyes.

"You're right." Peter nods, starting to unwrap it. "No, fucking way! No! No! You didn't!"

"I kinda did." Rachael grins, really excited to finally be able to give this to him

"It's the camera I wanted! But I didn't-how did you?" Peter asks unwrapping it all the way.

"Well I did my research- No, kidding. I asked Ned for the model and then I made Johnny buy it with my Dad's credit card." Rachael says.

"Oh my God! I can't this is too much!" Peter says trying not to sound overly excited, but failing.

"You have too. No returns. No exchanges. Queen's orders." Rachael smiles.

"This is the best present ever! Oh my God! I don't know how to thank you..." Peter smiles brightly looking between her and the camera.

"You don't have to. Though a kiss would not be rejected." Rachael smiled.

"Oh, I'm willing to do more than just kissing to pay you back for this." Peter says.

"Tempting. Maybe later. But for now we still have so much birthday stuff left to do, including cake at May's, presents and a party at the Baxter Building, along with an evening stroll in Central Park." Rachael smiles.

"Sounds perfect." Peter grins.

"It better I've been working my ass off for two weeks to plan this." Rachael says.

"Even if it's not it'll still be amazing, thank you." Peter smiles, kissing her gently.

"Happy birthday, tiger!" Rachael smiles. "Now let's go, we're on a tight schedule!"