Review 22 // Aarav Kumar
Here we have a very detailed and long character description by Utatane_Piko_V2
My comments will be in bold
Since this one is so long, there will be multiple comments in each section for convenience sake.
Basics and grounding
This is a really interesting and well thought out concept, this sounds like something I would genuinely read. All I have to say with something that introduces so many new concepts is to make sure that you don't throw them at the reader all at once. This was just a summery, so I expected it all at once but I was feeling slightly lost at first. So in the actual story, if you are writing a story, make sure not to dump everything on the reader at once.
Character information
We all love some subtle irony in writing, so I approve of the name choice. I like his design and the detail put into it. Links in comments don't ever work for me and I can't copy comments because wattpad won't allow it, so I couldn't access the link in the comment below.
I don't have many critiques for this section since it's very well thought out and most problems come from not enough thought being put into the character. Most characters have positive and negative personality traits to balance themselves out. So maybe add some positive traits to this guy? Unless he has a foil in the story.
Even little hobbies are still hobbies, they make the character seem more realistic. These are pretty realistic hobbies.
Relationships
First of all, yes, I recommend changing the name. Most author try to have characters with very different names since when people skim read over something they don't always take it in, and having very similar names could cause confusion.
Second of all, the relationships themselves are very well thought out and realistic. In a situation like this, it is very ways to make the character's parents horrible and overbearing, so I commend you on doing so thing different.
Backstory
This is clearly a very dark plot, which I'm completely fine with, all I have to say is be careful writing about such sensitive subjects.
Again, make sure you explain everything that happens well in the plot, since there are a lot of new concepts here that might be hard for the reader to wrap their head around at first glance.
Other / stats
Again, with so many concepts and things in this story, be careful, if their us too much for the reader to remember, they will become confused later on, especially if it isn't explained properly.
These stats and fighting style are perfectly fine. It follows what I normally say about stats so there's not much I can say here.
Extra
I normally don't have people giving me extra information about the character, so all I can really do is praise you for being so thorough and detailed in designing this character.
Final thoughts
This is a very well thought out character and plot, so there is very little for me to critique here. All I've really said is to be careful with certain aspects with what's going on in the universe. I think this could be an incredible story and the character could be very interesting. This is definitely something I would read, so good job!
*My critiques are simply at your request and to help improve your character. It is not my intention to cause any offence and you of course do not have to listen to what I've said. This us all just a bit of fun and I apologise if I have done any kind of damage*
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