Juniors

September 12, 2018; Louis

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I'm not thinking about Harry Styles on the morning of the first day of school, but I'm about to be thanks to one of my overly energetic friends.

"Yo, Lou, did you hear?" Luke bombards me as soon as I walked through the front door.

"One, don't call me that," I say, pushing my sunglasses onto my head and adjusting my red shirt. "Two, nice to see you again too! Three, yes, my summer was great, how was yours? Four, no, whatever you're referring to, I guarantee I did not hear."

"Bro, Harry and Gigi Hadid are dating! Or, at least hooking up," Luke continues, completely ignoring everything I had said.

"Wait, Harry? Like, Harry Ko? Or that freshman Harry that's in our study hall? Or the one in your grade? Luke, there's a lot of Harry's, you really can't expect me to-" I ramble, but Luke 

"Harry fucking Styles, Louis. God damn boy, do you really think Gigi would date any of the other Harry's?"

"Dayum, really? She's hot," Zayn says, sliding onto my right side as we continue our walk down the hall.

"No, they can't be dating. Harry's gay," I say without thinking. But then I do think. Hm. Was Harry ever out? Did I just out him?

"What?"

"No shit."

"I mean... I thought he was. I don't know, there's just something about– No, but what would I know, though, right?" I laugh nervously. Shit. Sorry, Harry.

"Weren't you two, like, super close in your freshman year?" Luke asks.

"I mean, yeah, but he never said that. I'm probably thinking of a different person."

Luke and Zayn nod, accepting my excuse, before heading off towards their first class, leaving me to get to my locker alone. Harry and Gigi? Impossible.

Sure enough, though, I turned the corner into my hallway and see none other than former bestie Mr. Styles himself shoving his tongue down Gigi's throat. And, of course, right next to my locker. I attempt to clear my throat as obnoxiously as I could while opening it, but they don't move.

"Hey, Gigi!" I finally resort to saying obnoxiously. Thankfully, she breaks apart from Harry.

"Lou Lou, hi!" She says happily, hugging me excitedly. "How was your summer?"

"Pretty good. Yours?" I ask her, ignoring the other figure standing next to her and his eyes burning into me as I shuffled through my stuff. How did I manage to avoid him for over a year and suddenly now, on the first day of school, this all happens?

"Oh, it was wonderful! I got caught up on some books I had been meaning to read, went shopping, of course, and-oh! Louis, Harry and I, we're dating. You know Harry, right?" And now I have confirmation from the couple themselves.

Now I'm forced to tear my eyes away from my locker and acknowledge Harry. He grew quite a bit over the summer, in height, muscle, and hair length.

"Vaguely, I suppose," I say at Harry, in answer to Gigi's question. "Listen, G, I gotta run to AP Stats, but we should definitely catch up soon."

"Oh, totally! Wait, wait, Harry's in AP Stats right now, aren't you, Harry?"

Please say no, Harry. Please. I can't deal with your face or your laugh or your anything.

"I am, yeah, but I wanted to actually talk to you for a little while longer, Gigi."

"Oh, okay," Gigi says, giggling. "I'll see you, Lou!" Then she turns back to her boyfriend and back to the kissing.

"Don't call me that," I mumble to her, but she definitely isn't listening to me anymore.

At lunch, I sit with my friends. Obviously. Zayn, Michael, Luke, and Liam, all football players, somehow accepted me into their group even though I don't play. Sadly, that meant that most of their conversations excluded me. It was fine today, though, because I could scout the freshmen.

I did notice that Harry sat with Gigi at her table. That changed up the environment of the cafeteria, though, because now that Harry left the theater club, people were noticing him and his attractiveness for the first time. Especially because mostly everyone knew about him and Gigi.

"Louis? Hello, earth to Louis?" Zayn snaps a few times in my face before I stop staring at Harry.

"Why you staring at the cheerleaders? You jealous of Styles?" Luke jokes.

And in my zoned out headspace, somehow I thought the next thing I said would be completely fine. "Nah, I'm gay."

Immediately, Liam and Michael start laughing, obviously thinking I was joking. But once they noticed that Luke, Zayn, and I both weren't cracking smiles, they stopped quickly.

"You're serious?" Liam asks.

"I mean, Zayn and Luke obviously already know... if you are that's totally fine," Michael adds.

I could only nod.

"Cool..." Michael starts. "So, does that mean you're jealous of Gigi?"

This time, everyone laughs. Even me, tentatively. Not the worst outcome of coming out for me.