He stepped up to the grave as he stuck his shaking hands into his pockets.

His hair was gelled, but his quiff was never quite the same.

He looked around, bringing one of those hands up to wipe his mouth and dub his neck.

"Alex?" I called to him.

He didn't answer.

"H-Hey...uh..." His voice was broken as he looked at his hands, that grew even more unsteady.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

He didn't answer.

Was he ignoring me?

"Al-"

" 'S been a while." His voice cracked.

"You're missing out on a lot..." He said.

I waved my hand in front of his face.

Nothing.

Unresponsive.

"I... Uh... Nick n Jane, they uh... Got married..."

I felt a slight panic.

Why wasn't he responding to me?

Its like he couldn't see me.

"Matt's married, too. Jamie and Christine hit a rough patch, but they're... Sometime in the spring... They'll... Its..."

I could hear the struggle in his voice.

"Alex, talk to me!" I screamed.

Nothing.

"Alex!" I continued to scream.

"Fuck..." He let out, tears rushing to his eyes and streaming down his face.

"It doesn't get easier, you know? The therapist told me it would but its not." He cried, falling to his knees.

I continued to scream.

"I miss you. It fucking hurts." He clenched his chest.

"Who the hell are you talking to?!" I screamed.

I looked down in front of him.

The marble headstone glowed.

Rest in peace, Sarah O'Malley.

I grew silent.

"I wish you were here..." He cried, touching the stone.

"Alex, I am! I'm right here!" I screamed, feeling the tears rush to my own eyes.

"I'm right here!" I screamed one final time.

My body jerked and I woke up.

I was sweating and I felt sick.

My breathing was fast and my heart was racing.

Just a dream?

A nightmare?

My eyes darted around the room before settling on the sleeping man next to me.

I tried, in shaking breaths to calm myself.

I reached out and poked his arm.

I could touch him.

I wasn't dead.

I wasn't dead.

I wasn't dead.

After a few moments of breathing and staring at him, I began to think...

What would happen if I were dead?

Would that happen?

Would he be broken, and I'd be helpless?

I didn't want to ready think about it, but it wasn't until I'd snapped back to reality (oHp tHerE gOes gRaviTy) that I felt the tears moving down my face.

I scooted over, closer to Alex.

I felt the heat coming from his body.

I was sitting up slightly next to him.

I took my hand and began stroking his hair softly, willing these leftover tears to stop.

I kept running my fingers through his hair, relishing in every moment I had contact with him.

I worried myself slightly, thinking about the nightmare.

It made me think of the text.

God, I wasn't ready to find out whatever or whoever that was and their motive.

I scooted down more in the bed.

The darkness of the room frightened me slightly.

I took a moment to think about how I got here.

I recalled the first moment I laid eyes on Alex.

The first moment I'd met him, as he defended me from high school bullies.

I thought about the times during tour in which his before show naps would be taken in my lap,my hand entangled in his hair just as it is now.

I doubted he could feel it, but that was okay.

It meant the world to me to be able to do it then, and it means the world to me now.

I let out a deep sigh and spoke softly, my voice quiet as a mouse.

"Alexander David Turner..." I huddled a little closer.

"I'm so grateful that I met you..."

I continued to softly stroke his hair.

"You're amazing, truly. In every way, shape, and form. You're amazing, and I don't know how I was so lucky... Really I should thank my brother but I'd rather thank your parents for creating such a beautiful and unique human being..."

I got close to his head.

"I love you so much..." I whispered, planting a soft kiss on his forehead.

Then, after I'd felt ready to sleep once more, I laid down completely, scooting close to Alex.

In his sleep, as if it were instinct,his arm wrapped around my waist, his face going into the crook of my neck.

I smiled as I wrapped my arm around him.

I closed my eyed and drifted off into a much more peaceful sleep.

~~~

A/N:

So short, my apologies!

I love you all xx