The room was slowing around me in a spinning blur.

His lips were warm against mine, and to say that it wasn't nice would be a lie, but in this moment, my lungs were closing.

My head was pounding.

He backed up and he had a worried look on his face, staring at me.

I looked to where Alex was, and he had disappeared again.

He'd seen.

He saw Van and I kiss.

This...

Van...

He stole it.

He stole my first kiss.

All this time, I'd hoped that one day my first kiss might be given to Alexander David Turner, but it was gone now.

I could never get it back.

I wasn't even dating Alex and I felt like I'd cheated on him.

I felt tears begin to brim at my eyes.

"Sarah?" He asked. I began to shake my head, then I turned to run.

"Sarah, wait!" I heard.

I kept running and I was looking for the bathroom.

I found myself on the other end of the bar, and I felt insanely dizzy.

"Hey, little girl." I felt my bum get grabbed. I yelped and ran before I could even look, pushing past people.

"Hey, bitch! Watch where you're going!" I heard someone shout.

I felt like my lungs were closing in on themselves.

Tears spilt down my cheeks.
I ran across the bar, but I was yanked and a man pulled me to him.

"Stop squirming!" He shouted, pulling my waist.

I yanked myself away from him, the old bruises aching from the recent contact.

What the hell was happening?

I spotted the front door and ran for it.

Once I reached the outside, I slammed against the way, sliding down to the floor as I let sobs exit my mouth.

It was cold, dark, and damp out here but my body felt like jelly.

My insides were turning and flipping.

Images of that man in the first bar flashed through my mind.

Him pulling my waist band, looking down my trousers.

The bruises he gave me.

The smack he planted across my face.

I heard crashes from the alley next to me.

I didn't want to go back inside. I didn't want to face whatever it was in the alley , that seemed to quiet and movie closer.

I sobbed and curled up into a ball.

I was scared.

I felt like I was going to die.

A silhouette appeared and I wrapped my arms around myself.

I wanted to go to the hotel room.

I wanted not to feel this way.

I wanted Nick.

As much as it shocked me, I wanted Van.

I wanted Matt.

I wanted Jamie.

I wanted-

"Sarah?!" Alex's voice rang out.

I blinked quickly to let more tears fall down my cheeks, so that they wouldn't blur my vision, and I looked up.

Alex crouched in front of me, sweat across his brow as he looked at me with concern.

"What happened?" He said in an exasperated tone.

"I'm sorry!" I shouted without thinking.

I began to cry and shake again and he launched forward. Taking me in his arms.

"Hey, hey, shh, Sarah, please, calm down." He murmured.

I continued to cry.

Alex backed up,.quickly slipping off his leather jacket and putting it around me.

I looked at his breath heaving appearance and looked at his hands as they secured the jacket.

His knuckles were bloody.

"Your hands!" I whispered.

"Dont worry about it, come here..." He said, sitting down and pulling me into his lap as he rocked me back and forth, kissing my head.

We stayed like that for a while.

I'd finally calmed down for the most part, and Alex was still holding me tightly.

My head was by his neck.

Soon, frantic footsteps found their way out the front door, and Van came out, looking around and spotting us.

"Sarah! Alex! Thank god you're okay!" He sighed, stepping towards us.

I sniffed.

"What the fuck did you do to her?" Alex's tone came out sharp and angry.

"I didn't do anything!" He said.

"I kissed her! That's it!"

I felt Alex's grip tightening around me.

"Dont fight." ,I choked out.

Listening to them fight was the last thing that I needed right now.

Van and Alex stared at one another for a moment and then Van nodded.

He got down on his knees, looking into my eyes.

Alex was holding me still, almost defensively.

His grip loosened a little bit and I turned to fAce Van.

"I'm sorry, princess." He said, reaching out for one of my hands.

I let him take one.

"Its fine." I murmured.

"What happened there, though?" He asked.

"Sarah was almost raped the last time she went in a bar." Alex said.

Van's eyes widened and he looked back to me.

"Sarah, I'm so sorry." He said.

My head felt a mess. I felt warm.

"I'm fine." I cried out.

Nick appeared from the door and looked over.

"What happened?" He said.

He looked between the three of us and Alex let me go.

I got up and quickly ran into his arms.

Nick rubbed my back as he held my tightly. He placed a light kiss on my forehead.

"You're okay, pip. You've had a long day. Let's get you back to the hotel."

I nodded and Nick pulled out his phone.

He called Jane and told her to tell all the boys that he was taking us back to the hotel, since I got a little scared at the bar.

He told them to keep having a good time, and that he would come back to get them.

"Here," Nick handed Van the keys and we walked to the car, unlocking it and climbing inside.

After minute or two of silence, Van spoke up.

"Are you mad at me?"

I sniffed.

"No." I finally said.

"I'm sorry. It was a in the moment thing and I-"

"We're fine." I said.

He looked at me and then scooted forward.

I went into his arms and hugged him tightly.

"I'm not mad at you. I just, I freaked out and I,"

"You love him, don't you?"

I stayed silent for a minute in shock.

He parted from me.

"You love him."

I stared into Van's eyes for a moment.

I bit my lip and nodded.

Van looked at me for a minute.

"I figured." He sighed.

"I did like you, just to clear the air. But I suppose, I can be another brother. You and him seem to fit anyways." He smiled.

I blushed and he laughed.

"Come here then." He said, pulling me into him again.

We stayed like that until Nick returned.

Alex was lagging behind him.

He had a cig and bandages were wrapped around his knuckles on both hands.

We'll never be normal, will we?

~~~
A/N;

I'm so sorry if these chapters are bad.

I sort of out myself in a hole, and it could be better.

Hopefully it's not too bad, and you still like it.

Also please remember that Sarah consumed some strong alcohol as well as Van and All that.

Also no, she wasn't drugged.

Leave some predictions, it might be fun !