Jane

Warm pleasure took over me when my eyes opened. I could feel our hearts beating together as one in the silent room. My nightmares didn't touch my soul yesterday, but Ashton surely did. When he kissed me all over again, my world stopped moving and my mind became fuzzy with all the frenzy feelings. I knew what it felt like when time stopped and came to bite you in the ass, but this was different. The horror was not there, my past was not lingering around anymore and I was not bleeding in pain either.

Was this temporary?

Strong arms were draped all over me, tucking me into his chiselled chest as it pressed against my back. He was spooning me and I burrowed myself against him so hard, it made me squirm repeatedly. I placed my hand on my mouth so I wouldn't wake him up through my rumbling moans.

I loved it.

I loved every single moment with this handsome man.

His soft mouth was pressed on the curve of my neck. I enjoyed the way he held me so tightly even in his sleep. It was almost as if he was giving me everything that my life lacked. I felt small, crumbling against his hold, and there was no place I would rather be other than staying in bed with Ashton.

He really did make me feel safe. I knew I was putting him on a high pedestal, but I never wanted to forget that he was human too. He could make mistakes. He could let me down. I needed to release my wild heart from the cage it was captured inside for so long. I needed to take this risk once in my life because I swear to God, I had never felt a knot in my heart like this. The suffocation which stopped me from breathing without Ashton's presence nearby was intense enough to kill me.

A soft sound escaped his chest, making me smile as I looked at him in awe; I could hear Ashton breathe right next to me and for some reason, it soothed my nerves.

This felt too right.

Too good.

I was too happy at this particular moment.

Last night, while talking about the incident with the cab driver, Ashton's veins popped out of his neck, and it was the first time I had seen him this furious.

The flaring of his nostrils and the overcoming redness on his face was the most adorable thing I had ever witnessed. He cared a little too much about me and I was getting used to the feeling of being adored. I couldn't watch his knuckles turn white again-he was already gripping the nightstand hard enough for the wood to crack. I didn't know what else to do to make him smile so I pulled him by the collar and just kissed him again in the same way he did before.

"It is okay," I laughed, looking at him hungrily. It was really okay. I didn't care if I brawled out my eyes in the cab and let the ugly tears escape my eyes that made the driver glance at me through the rearview mirror. I didn't care about the fact that the cab driver sprayed something to make me unconscious for his own advantage. I didn't care about anything right now because Ashton's presence was enough to light up the darkness in my light. He was the light I desperately needed to keep close to me.

"You saved me again, Ashton. That's what you do," I murmured in his ear, kissing his perfect jawline. Kissing him was perfect. It made my heart pound against my chest in a painful way but I still loved it. I came all the way down, gazing my lips against his heated skin as my tongue licked his bottom lip first, then I pulled back and stared into his now-relaxed green eyes before pressing small pecks on his lips. I ran my hands on his stubble and cupped his face, he was so beautiful and I wanted to ease his ache. I wanted his pain to erase, I wanted his mother to heal because I knew what it felt like losing your mother. I lost her when I was six and it kills me to this day.

"My adorable little kitten. You have claimed me in ways nobody else ever had," he said in a husky whisper. A smile spread across his face and he pulled me on his lap, tracing the side of my face with his thumb as his lips worked the tender skin on my neck.

He was brave and he made me feel brave.

I played with his long, dark hair which had grown a little longer than I had last seen them. He hadn't shaved either and every time he came closer, he made sure to let the roughness of his chin touch my skin; the pleasure was sweet and intense at the same time, sending jolts up my spine.

I wiggled in his arms, trying not wake him up. I got my phone from the nightstand. It was early in the morning. I turned around again, enclosing our distance as I brought his shirt closer to my nose and got lost in his beachy sent.

"Yeah, Hope. Keep doing that with my hair. I love it when you play with them," he smiled as his sleepy eyes fluttered at me. He looked tired yesterday and I was glad to see the freshness overcoming his face today. He slept while I kept fiddling the perfect curl on his forehead. I didn't go and sleep on the couch outside because I needed Ashton. I had spent a lot of time without him and I wasn't ready to do it right now. Besides, this was my safe haven. It felt like home even though I had lost my home long ago.

We needed this fix.

I kissed the frown on his forehead, studying the attractive man who had drifted back to sleep right next to me. He moved a little and pulled me in closer. I smiled, but then my mouth burst open and my heart rate spiked up as his fingers started tickling the bare skin of my stomach.

"Ashton...stop! Oh, God," I shouted as I jumped away, wiping a tear from my eyes. Nobody had ever tickled me. I didn't even know I could laugh like this even when I was so defensive.

He passed me a smirk which came along like an icing over those gorgeous dimples. Then he rubbed his beautiful eyes before shoving his hand forward so I could grab it. His messed up hair was perfect and I kept drinking the sight of him.

"Damn. If I knew you would jump away from my arms, I would have never tickled you. I want to keep you close to me, baby, " he mumbled in a thick voice as he flexed his muscles and my body fevered, reminding me I was ruined. Ashton's presence was going to ruin me. My eyes were stuck on his toned stomach which could be easily seen now. His shirt was pulling up and I had a sudden urge to rip it off and run my fingers on each rippling ab.

I took his inviting hand and threaded our fingers together. I shuddered against him due to the contact, causing him to smirk and sit on his elbow.

He was now sitting on the edge of the bed and peeking at me with a boyish Chesire cat smile that I was so obsessed with. Placing his arms around my waist, he suddenly enclosed our distance and buried his head on my stomach. He took a deep sniff, rubbing his nose on my belly.

Was he inhaling my smell?

My breathing shot from slow to fast within seconds.

What was he doing?

His expressive behaviour caused a few tears to spark up but I shoved them back. This is what being cared about felt like; something I had never known before.

"You are trembling and biting those plump lips...I love that. Guess I will start loving every single thing about you soon enough," he croaked out, pulling my hand in one swift move. I gasped sharply as I landed on his chest. I blushed, looking away from him. Keeping my cool was just not an option anymore.

"No, I want your eyes on me. Do you have any idea how crazy it drives me when you look at me with those deep blue eyes as if you want each part of me?" He said, looking at me with a need and certainty. He knew I was ogling him like he was my only treat. My heart squeezed at his words.

"I love these silky strands," I swallowed hard as my words caught up in my throat. I couldn't form words right now and he knew it. He chuckled at my reaction by throwing his head back against the pillow, making the vibration from his chest inject into me.

"You want me to go back to sleep?"

"Maybe..." my voice trailed off as I felt his hand resting on my lower back, just above my hips. I stilled and he glanced at me with an unknown want, making sure I wouldn't throw him away. This was new and a sensation of making his hand drop lower came crashing into me.

"Oh, Hope. You are so responsive. Wish I knew that before," he grinned and started kissing my neck possessively as his hands went straight inside my shirt and caressed my back. He didn't do much, but all he wanted was to feel me. I froze again, but then I relaxed against his sacred touch. "I love my guitar," he smiled, laughing out loud as the corners of his lips quirked up. I laughed back, patting his arm. He could be random sometimes.

"I know," I said against his lips.

"When I touch you, it seems as if I am playing my guitar. The delicacy is there, but the only difference is... you are so soft, Hope. So damn soft and sweet and I can hold you. I can taste so much."

This was Ashton. This was the man who controlled my breathing, I couldn't push him away.

"I am at a loss for words. Nobody has said those things to me. My heart squeezes when you are so near me. This feels different and good. Your words are always perfect, but they scare me sometimes...I feel like one day I would be too much for you," I spoke breathlessly. He was quiet for a while and closed his eyes tightly as he took a long, deep breath. A few seconds later, his grip on my body became tighter as he searched for my eyes.

"You have no idea how many times I woke up in the middle of the night just to assure myself you were here with me. Then you made those purring noises again and I knew I was home. You make me feel like home," he said, pressing a kiss on my chin.

"Mmm, I.." I couldn't talk anymore, he was licking the sensitive skin on my neck and biting just around my collar bone. I threw my head back and let him pleasure me with his flickering tongue. This was my weakness. His lips were my weakness.

"You are here, Hope and I don't want you drifting away. I don't think I can handle losing you," his voice cracked and he pulled my bottom lip into his mouth and kissed me gently.

"I am not going anywhere. I have changed my mind," I said, absently inspecting my fingernails.

"What do you mean you have changed your mind? You were leaving?" He panicked, gazing back into my eyes as his green hoods widened. There was an ache followed by a storm inside those green hues.

"I had my reasons to leave, but I am not. Not anymore. I was going to resign because I had some things to sort out back at home, but then I realised this is here where I wanted to be," I smiled, caressing his chest where his heart rested. He nodded, moving his hands all over my bare back. There was a pacifying emotion under his touch and every time his fingers moved, I felt him shudder underneath me.

I laid my head on his chest and held him tightly, knowing each bone in my body trusted and wanted him in an immense manner. We stayed stuck to one another in silence. I closed my eyes, preparing myself for the emotional battle I had to face soon enough. I was planning on telling Ashton everything because he was slowly peeling me away and getting under my skin.

Was I in love with him?

***

Note: Took long. Haha. Will try to be as quick with updates as I can. Love you all. Thanks for being here.

Oh? Current rank is : #286 in ROMANCE!!

*SCREAMS* 😍

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