Note: I enjoy writing in Ashton's POV the most but you guys deserve to know how Jane felt during the hug so...
Also, it is hardly edited cause I didn't have time :(((

Jane

Flashbacks are the worst. It is unbelievable how much you can relate to someone's life story.

As Ashton talked about his mom, it reminded me of the time when I was wrapped in my mother's arms. She would make me feel safe even with so much delicacy. I remembered calling her my doll and spending hours combing those long blonde strands, she would put her lips between her teeth which would stop her from making a noise caused by the rough strokes on her hair. It smelled like strawberry vanilla and I missed that scent.

Sad was the fact that I looked at my parents as my protectors but they failed to protect each other, at least my father failed.

The flashbacks crushed me, it seemed almost as if my bones were breaking and trying to pinch out of my skin with their sharp chiselled edges. I was crumbling into pieces and that is when he held me in his arms.

I was wrapped in Ashton's arms.

I was there in his arms.

I was there in his arms, exposed to the possibility of being emotionally attacked.

When he pushed his body against mine, my flashbacks faded and all my focus shifted to the tiny details of our enclosure. Ashton was holding me tightly against his strength as if I was someone who he had closely known and lost; now that I was found again, he didn't want to let me go.

He was moving his hands on my back and rocking me from side to side. What was he doing to me? It was oddly comforting. His chin was resting on my head and I was breathing in his scent, my lips touching the warmth of his neck.

Ashton smelled like the sea, it was a beachy scent which was intoxicatingly fresh. His body odor reminded me of the time we spent at the beach, the time when he mesmerized me completely with his voice. The time when I picked up the sand and let it fall out of my fingers while his hands carefully touched each string of the guitar.

His raspy voice made me fall in love with the song. He sounded a little bit like Bryan Adams. It had that grit and I wondered if he would even know the lyrics to Bryan's songs.

After a few moments spent in his haze, I started feeling uncomfortable. The senses which he had numbed, were going back to normal.

The discomfort was not Ashton's fault, it was happening to me because never before had I let anyone this close to me. When I looked at him, his eyes were closed but he didn't release me. He had such an earthly aura to his personality. His hands started shifting, his fingers moved from my back to my arms and then lower and lower till they reached my waist. The touch caused a tingling reaction in my body because it seemed like I was his guitar and he was playing my strings. I looked at him in surprise.

"What are you doing?" I asked, confused along. But then, a smile started spreading around the corner of my mouth. The smile was not a happy kind of smile but it was the smile which proved that I had accepted Ashton as someone who was a bit similar to me. His life was not straight either, it was hanging on a breakable string and he was going through the phases of loss. However, he looked funny and peaceful. The tension was still obvious near the lines of his eyes but his expressions were soft. My eyes shifted to his lips and quickly returned back to his eyes.

Were we made to entwine or was this all some smoggy bullshit I was falling for?

I was embarrassed for staring at his lips because he caught me looking at them. My cheeks started heating up, my eyes betraying me; I diverted my eyes back to his lips and then to his eyes, all over again and again and again. The green of his eyes had an unusual shine to it. They looked like precious little studs, freshly carved out. It was almost as if hues of green were running wildly in them. Sometimes they would be the darkest shade of green in which he hid his pain and when they turned pale green, it showed that he was at rest. And right now, it was a mixture of both. His eyes showed feelings.

"I will drop you to the hotel," he said, ignoring my question and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. His slight touch on my ear caused me to suck in a breath. The complexity of the color in his eyes became emerald green, and instantly it became the only light I knew besides the moonlight which hovering over us.

Why was I not pushing him away? Had I forgotten how emotions play and wreck you?

I was still not able to meet his gaze so I just nodded without rejecting his sweet gesture like I did previously. I was so used to shutting people out that I didn't even feel guilty for it until I met Ashton.

"Look at me, Hope." He cupped my cheeks with his hands, which caused me to look up at him. I gazed into his eyes in silence.

"Your eyes are so green," I whispered shyly as the blood crept up my cheeks. I really wasn't in my senses or I wouldn't have said those things to him. The cold breeze was not enough to cool down my heated skin, I was flushed and I knew he could see it.

"And your eyes are so blue. Do you know which color when mixed with blue makes green?"

"Yellow?" I laughed at his random question.

"Yellow means hope. When the blue of your mixes with hope, you look at my green hues. Now you know why I call you Hope?" he smirked.

Did he just cause me serious breathing issues?

"Hues? Aren't you a bit too poetic for your own good?" I asked, struggling to take a deep breath and keeping my composure.

"Well, my poetry class never came in handy before and I didn't know I could be this poetic until I met you," he said, letting the corner of his mouth lift.

"Off with the cheesy dialogues, Ashton. Can you ever stop?" I teased, still blushing. He was crazy. Crazier than anyone I had ever seen.

"Jane, I hardly have to try. You make me want to say all of these things and I can't even stop myself. The truth is, I never want to stop."

When he said those words, small dimples appeared on the right side of his face. They evoked a sudden urge in me to touch them and that is exactly what I did. I poked a finger on his dimples and quickly turned away, embarrassed by my lack of control.

I kept my hand on my heart and pressed my chest hard enough to suffocate it. What was that feeling? I had no idea how to describe the sensation igniting from me when Ashton's breath was slightly kissing my cheeks as I touched his face.

"Awkward,"I whispered to myself. My voice barely audible.

"Not at all, Hope," he whispered back, shoving my hair away from one side of my neck to another.

As the humiliation started falling over me, I started walking away.

It was the second time I had cried in his embrace and showed him how vulnerable I could be. Was I happy about it?

Well, I don't feel guilty but I am not proud of it either. There was something on the inside, begging me to let go of him as if he knew too much about me but at the same time, a part of me wanted to give our friendship a chance but that dizzy feeling felt like something else. It felt so wrong because of my trust issues. After today's session with Ashton, I felt like I could trust him but I could be wrong too.

His story made me cry. It made me realize that I was not the only one suffering. I cry too much. It is not even normal. I felt like a melodramatic heroine. I have always cried about the past, the haunting memories but not for new people or attachments. I have never felt a thing but Ashton made me feel things I didn't even know I was capable of feeling.

What do you know about friendship, Jane?

Has he trespassed one of my walls? Certainly.

It was the first time that I had let a boy this close to me. Scratch that. I don't even remember having a friend. Ashton made me feel good. I hated it but I needed a friend and after last night's dream slash hallucination, I was too scared to be alone. Maybe it was a temporary fix?

"Where do you think you are going? Why do you keep walking away?" He screamed, terror dawned onto his face.

"I am walking towards your car," I smiled and started pacing my footsteps forward.

***

Someone was shaking me and poking at my arm and grabbing my shoulder too. I felt scared and pressed my already closed eyelids even more. It was going to happen again. No, please God, save me.

"Hey, wake up, sleepy head."

When the familiar voice hit me, I slowly opened my eyes. My vision was blurry as Ashton's figure started developing in front of me. I rubbed my eyes and turned to my left, the car was no longer moving but he was staring at me. His hands were now folded over his chest and his head was thrown back on the seat. I shook the sleep and confusion from my face and straightened my posture.

"When did I fall asleep?" I said, licking my lips.

"Ever since the car started moving," he smiled, scrutinizing my entire face.

I had never slept in a moving vehicle.

"When was the last time you slept? You look exhausted."

I did not respond to his question. Instead, I started grabbing my coat and purse.

"Are you okay?" He shifted in his seat then came closer to me.

"Yeah," I replied shortly.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

There was a soothing kind of silence in the car. Silence has always made me connect with Ashton. I wondered if he ever felt the same way. After a few seconds of staring into each other's eyes, a mischievous smile started lingering on my face.

"Are you okay?" My tone was serious but I was trying hard not to smile.

"I am feeling better," he said softly.

"Are you sure, Ashton?"

"Yes, Hope. I don't lie," he whispered in the raspy voice which I loved.

"Are you really really sure?"

When those words left my mouth, his eyes widened in surprise and he finally understood what I was doing. From the way his eyebrows raised up high, it showed that he was altogether amused.

"Damn, you are good." He kept stroking those brown strands off his face and the dents on his mouth started appearing.

Oh, those dimples again.

"Now you see how it feels when someone keeps asking you how you feel?" The way those words came out of my mouth, proved that I was irritated but on the inside, I liked the fact that he cared enough to ask.

"So I was irritating you?" He frowned.

"I can't believe that you still have doubts about that," I teased, my tone was playful.

He chuckled and shifted his wild eyes on the road.

"So you said you don't lie.You actually did."

"I did not?" He said, almost questioning.

"You know you aren't perfect, right? I mocked. "Everyone lies even the ones who are the closest to you. The world is blurry, you can't see anything clearly. It is all mushy, everything is a lie. Everyone is a lie."

"Jane, are you still talking to me?" His hands were grabbing my shoulders tightly.

"What kind of an absurd question is that?" I scoffed.

"The way you talked about the world being dark seemed as if-"

"It didn't seem like anything..just ignore it. Will you?"

"Cant."

"Well, then I will ignore you," I winked.

"Not anymore," he winked back. The playful wink made me feel like I was found again; I no longer felt lost but my feelings were still insecure.

Ashton came closer to me and pressed a kiss on my cheek while smiling gently on my skin. I closed my eyes and leaned into him and then pulled away suddenly.

"Bye, Ashton." My eyes were no longer able to meet his.

When I turned open the lock of the car, he shifted his weight and pulled my hand from the handle.

"What?" I questioned.

"What?" He questioned back, his voice was affecting me more than anything.

He moved to his side and opened the door, got out of the car and walked towards my side to open mine.

I drew a slow breath as confusion overcame me all over again.

This boy seriously confuses the shit out of me.

"Why did you get out?" I looked up at him as he grabbed both of my hands between his and pulled me out.

"To drop you off,"

"Haven't you already done that?" I questioned while standing in front of him, his hands were still holding mine just like his gaze.

His lips parted but when I saw no sign of him saying anything, I let go off his hands.

"I can walk on my own you don't have to do that,"

"I won't always listen to you," he smirked and I shoved his shoulder playfully.

***

When we reached the outside of my room, I started panicking because I felt like I had lost my key for the tenth time.

"Deja Vu?" Ashton said while smoothly sliding the key inside the lock and holding the door open for me.

I smiled at the reminder of our first meeting, it was the vivid memory of how mean I was with him.

"Hey, Hope?" I nodded almost as if my name was really Hope and not Jane. Maybe I should consider changing my name. After all, my monster like father named me Jane.

"You made me feel a lot better today, it is like I can finally breathe."

"I wish could say the same." I loved teasing him when he was this serious.

"Can I get your number since we are friends now?" Ignoring my comment, he forced a smile

"Never," I said while staring at him with a concentrated expression fading on my face. With that, I slammed the door in front of him.

After just a few seconds only, I opened the door and peeked outside, hoping he would still be there. To my surprise, he was standing there with his hands in his pant's pocket-like the first time. When he saw me, his frown shifted and turned into a smile.

"Deja Vu?" I repeated in his heavenly accent.

***

NOTE:

1. Oh, my God guys. The exams are sucking the life out of me. URGH!I have lost all my ideas and creativity cause of the worst kind of writer's block. HATE HATE HATE IT.

2.I HOPE YOU LIKED THE CHAPTER THO. Don't forget to VOTE and COMMENT!

3. Btw NUMB has reached the hotlist again and it will stay if you guys keep voting. Please support me (:

4. What time is it where you guys are?

5. There is another book I have started. It is a short story kinda stuff. Actually, it is a prompt book, you guys can send me words or phrases and I will write a one-shot story out of it. I have just done two right now. Check it out :)