Stomping clashed with huffing. Cold blades striking against a warm-running face. He did not feel safe yet.

Oliver had stopped running once he reached the city center. His apartment was farther off the center, leaving him to have run quite a while. Oliver was out of breath, and now that his adrenaline has sunk down, he felt his limbs aching. He noticed the stares of pedestrians as he was sitting down on a set of stairs to get back to a normal composure. Oliver didn't care about the other people. In a city like his one, people weren't about to remember that for long anyway.

The late afternoon hours showed effect on the blond as he was shivering from the cold wind brushing against his sweat-covered body. He hadn't cared about his outwear when he was still in the apartment, but now he regretted not to have grabbed a thicker jacket.

Once his breathing got back to normal, Oliver set off to find a place to stay in. He didn't dare to get back home anytime soon and it was only getting darker and colder outside. The blond knew Fukase would be upset once he returned back home. Perhaps he would even be waiting at the door entrance, ready to show Oliver once again who was in control of their relationship.

A cold shudder crawled down Oliver's spine when he imagined Fukase's outbursts. As vulnerable and lost the redhead sometimes appeared, he definitely could show aggressive sides.

Never before Oliver had run away from home like that. He couldn't predict how Fukase was feeling. That scared him. He didn't know how to react appropriately and thus, was terrified to take a wrong step. The nauseous feeling developing inside of him signaled him staying away wasn't the right way either, but Oliver was helpless. He didn't know how to react differently, leave out confronting Fukase directly yet. He needed to get somewhere else first.

Pushing open the doors to a bar nearby, the distinct smell of alcohol was the first thing that clashed against Oliver's face. He had to hold his breath for a few seconds and slowly get used to it before finding a seat at the counter. Despite of it to only be early evening, quite a few people have already gathered in the bar, some of them already filled up. It was a nostalgic sight.

Oliver hadn't been in social gatherings like these for years, yet he remembered well the times when he was a regular visitor. Almost automatically, he sat down, got out of his jacket and checked the people around him. They were mostly focused either on the TV or talking together. Their cheerful behavior entertained Oliver for a while. He rarely got to hear about other people's lives. He ignored his coworker's conversations in order to focus on work, but now he noticed that it was more interesting than he first thought.

Even so, Oliver's attention got drawn to something else soon enough. His eyes fixated on the drinks scattered across the counter and he gulped hard. He hadn't drunken any alcohol in years, but now the temptations were strong. Drinking away his rampant mind suddenly sounded dulcet. He checked his pockets and sighed in disappointment to have found only a twenty-dollar note. He wasn't going to get far with that little money. Even so, Oliver took what he had and ordered a few shots. He concluded that his long time of sobriety would help him get off his thoughts with smaller amounts of liquor as well.

The situation felt alien to him. Holding the small glasses with familiar liquid in his hand reminded him of times when drinking was his only way to escape reality. Oliver was glad he found cheaper ways by now, but a sting of longing travelled across his body nonetheless. Being numbed out just had its advantages sometimes.

The alcohol was burning on his throat as he dunk it in; a small smile crept up his face. Despite the long absence, he suddenly felt like it was just yesterday he settled down somewhere and spent a good night. Oliver took another shot, waited for a while and then let the first schemes of alcohol haze his mind.

Oliver looked to his side and made eye contact with a woman a few seats further. He beamed a smile at her and so did she. She looked like she was alone and Oliver suddenly didn't feel as lonely anymore. Seeing someone in the same situation as him reassured him. Her eyes reflected with sadness, yet, her sluggish smile hid enough of it for any other drunken person not to notice. Instead, a few hours of fun would follow to heal wounds.

Oliver wasn't about to have any fun here though. He found himself too loyal to Fukase than to enjoy himself with a stranger. Even in his most drunken states, he had always noticed the distressing sensation taking over his body whenever an opportunity had shown up. Instead, Oliver dedicated his attention solely to his drinks. He noticed his body and mind feeling lighter. He almost couldn't remember anymore why he was that upset; it even amused him how he could get so upset over an argument. This lightheadness caused him to feel happy. It was a strange feeling for Oliver but it was too relieving than to try pushing it away either.

At the end of his drinking session, Oliver couldn't make out how long he has stayed in the bar, but he decided to leave eventually. He had run out of money long ago and needed fresh air. The delightful feeling has vanished by now and all that was left was a numbing feeling in his body. Oliver felt empty. The night sky was pitch-black and the wind was shakening him up, but Oliver decided to take a walk anyway.

He couldn't go home yet. Despite his hazy mind, he knew Fukase was waiting for him, ready to confront him. He was scared of that. He thought of where he could stay the night instead. With no money and no connections, it was hard to find something. Even in his drunken state, the cold really made it difficult for Oliver to keep moving. Sleeping somewhere in the park would lead to him dying of hypothermia at most; Oliver didn't feel like risking that.

The streets were still lively despite the late hour. People were outside and enjoying themselves. Oliver didn't feel like he belonged into this scenario. He was here because he was lost and unwanted anywhere else. His stoic face didn't show it and he didn't want anyone to find out either.

Oliver took a way out of the city to more lonesome places. The silence combined with the cold was unbearable but also appropriate. He felt like he was able to breath again. There, he could feel the coldness, his hunger, his tiredness and his last shreds of hope to fade again. Oliver felt miserable. Yet, he thought that he more than deserved it. He caught himself running from his problems once more, and these were the consequences. The blond decided to not look for a place to sleep tonight. He was just going to keep walking until he was ready to go back home again. Regretting his decisions, Oliver saw that as the right punishment for his foolish actions.

Oliver reached the suburban area of the city. The roads appeared more abandoned and nature dominated the landscape. He lost sense of time and conditions; neither the time nor his exhaustion penetrated through his mind.

However, Oliver did jump out of his trail of thoughts as soon as a car passed up to him. He walked down to the grass field and expected it to pass by, however, it lined up with his speed steadily. Oliver decided to ignore it for now, hoping for no one to approach him. In the middle of nowhere, he wasn't up for any chatters with strangers.

Nonetheless, even after some time, the car did not drive off. Oliver got nervous. He glanced over to the car without moving his head. A familiar color perked up in the corner of his eyes. Oliver froze as he realized that this car was his own. His car came to a stop as well, still no reaction from the driver. It was too dark to see who was in it, but the blond didn't have a good feeling about it. Something inside of him told him to run away again, but his body did not listen.

The window drove down and a light inside the car lit up. Fukase was giving Oliver a warm smile. The blond did not react. His stare pierced through his partner who did not falter.

"Get in, Oliver. You must be freezing."

Oliver knew this was more of an order than an option. His stomach turned when thinking about confronting Fukase, but he knew he did have to get in the car. Running away would only lead to more trouble.

There was an awkward silence when he got in the car. Fukase switched off the engine and turned up the heating. Oliver sighed relieved internally when warmth started to wrap around his body. His fingers slowly started to obey again. The blond's eyes fixated the street, avoiding eye contact with his partner. His hazy mind didn't allow him to figure out what was going on inside of Fukase and he was scared to upset the redhead for no reason.

Oliver flinched heavily when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He slowly looked at Fukase who was still smiling weakly. The redhead stroke across Oliver's neck reassuringly and reached to the back of the car. An orange-golden flower appeared in Oliver's sight. He stared at it dumbfounded when Fukase pressed it in his hands.

"I'm sorry I was so harsh on you earlier. Please forgive my unreasonable behavior."

Oliver looked at the flower again. It was a marigold. Fukase always got Oliver that flower when he apologized. The blond didn't quite figure out why that was, but it became a symbol for Fukase's affection nonetheless.

Usually Oliver would be reassured that Fukase seriously apologized, but he didn't feel anything now. Even the symbolic meaning behind it left him untouched. He looked back at Fukase who was still smiling faintly, clearly longing for an answer from Oliver. The blond remained quiet. He didn't know how to react nor did he want to. He wasn't ready to forgive Fukase, yet, he didn't want to turn this into another fight.

Fukase bent down to his bag and pulled out a bottle of water. Oliver's eyes longingly stared at the liquid. After all this alcohol, he now noticed how much he needed something refreshing to drink. Fukase chuckled at the sight of Oliver's expression and handed the bottle of water to him. He watched the blond take a few sips. Fukase hummed in content.

"You know I care about you, right?" Fukase asked and ran his fingers through Oliver's hair. The blond did not react and averted his face, acting as if he was focused on his drink. Something inside of him protested at these words. He couldn't quite figure out himself what that was, but he did feel nauseous from it.

"Do you not believe me?" Fukase's voice sounded harsher and more determined. Oliver gulped and put the bottle away. He wanted to react, but his body did not agree. Every further second felt like torture when Oliver didn't manage to save the situation by saying something. He clenched his fists and noticed his finger nails pressing in his hand palms. It made him even more nervous.

"That's...not-"

"Is this what our relationship is like? You don't trust me?"

Oliver felt tears dwelling up when he noticed the helpless situation he was in. His body would not listen and Fukase was about to burst out any second. The numbed out feeling of his mind weighed him down. A sudden pull on Oliver's hair woke him out of his thoughts. A scream escaped his throat as Fukase tore his head up. His eyes met with the redhead's.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" Fukase yelled and tightened his grip on Oliver's hair. The blond initially tried to escape the painful grip, but stopped eventually. All strength left his body. Instead, tears started dripping down his face. Desperation overcame his mind as he was looking at his upset partner.

"Why?" Oliver sobbed and gulped down hard. "Why have you turned this way? I barely recognize you."

Fukase froze and stared at his partner in disbelief. Oliver bursted out into a fit of crying, leaving the redhead to himself. He couldn't understand what Oliver was saying to him. Something inside of his raged up, making him want to hit his partner for his words. It cost him great energy to prevent that from happening as there was something else inside of him slowly dominating this infuriating sensation. It hurt Fukase and left him frown in pain.

Unsure of where this wave of sadness came from all of a sudden, Fukase felt weak and motionless. He let go of Oliver, who crouched in himself, and stared at the blond. The overwhelming feeling of sadness made him feel empty.

It felt like hours have passed once Fukase found himself composed enough to react again. He locked the doors as he noticed Oliver to be about to get out of the car, and started the engine. Oliver had calmed down with crying and looked up sheepishly. Fukase didn't look at him and instead focused on the streets while driving off.

"Let's go home for now."