Leo

I thought I was disoriented when Aria suddenly broke things off with me, leaving me staring after her, takeout boxes in hand, and wondering what the hell just happened.  I thought I was disoriented the next day when I was having dinner with Mom, Aunty Tenille, and Kit. But as it turns out, the third day post-breakup, when the wedding is going on and I'm standing adjacent to the altar, is the day I'm most disoriented. I've been mulling over the breakup for the past couple of days now, wondering what the hell made Aria cut things off so quickly. I thought I had gotten my message across to her. Yes, the attention is nearly unbearable, but I'm finding ways to cope. Even more so now that she's not responding to my texts or calls. I know that, somewhere deep inside me, I have the ability to overcome this.

I just don't understand why she left. Why she won't talk to me. It's actually depressing, not being able to have contact with her. I've talked to Benn and Scarlett, met up with them for dinner last night, but Aria won't talk to them, either. She won't talk to anyone, apparently. Benn said all she's been doing is moping around the house. Scarlett said she's still showing up to practice, but her game has been off. And that instead of sticking around and bantering back and forth with the team, she heads straight home. It was all I could get out of them. 

I'm not sure whether or not I should go to the house and demand to talk to her. I'm stuck balancing on a thin line here; I don't want to seem like that controlling boyfriend, but I also want some answers about what happened the other day. 

This is the issue that continues to run through my head while I sit here, at one of the tables in the corner, and listen to the celebration surrounding me. I've done my best to appear happy for my family. I smiled walking down the aisle, clapped when Aunty Tenille and Uncle Kit sealed their marriage with a kiss, and I even joked around during the speech. But when all that was over, when I lost any sense of purpose to being here, I dwindled off into the shadows. I'm sure I look like a disaster: my tie is loose and hanging around my neck, my hair is dishevelled, and my posture is slack. I don't want to be a downer. I want to be celebrating this infinite moment of happiness with everyone, but it's hard for me to do. It's hard because Aria and I had been so excited to attend the wedding together. We'd even correlated our freaking outfits. 

I sigh, resting my chin on my fist as I stare at my drink, watching the carbonated bubbles rise to the top and disappear. The fact that I'm drinking ginger ale makes me feel even more foolish than I already do. I don't know why I'm still here. It's not like I'm adding anything to the atmosphere. If anything, I'm deducting energy from it. 

Pushing my drink back, I get to my feet and decide I'm going to leave. As much as I want to celebrate, my mood isn't suitable for it at the moment. It's selfish of me to do, but I'm not the kind of person that can ignore my emotions. Besides, no one is going to notice if I sneak off. 

I wind my way through the crowd, avoiding swirling dresses and stumbling left-footed people as they sway to the twang of the country music that's causing the walls to tremble. I'm envious of these people, the ones who can laugh and have fun as if they have nothing to worry about in this messed-up world. 

I'm halfway down the hallway to the back doors I'm planning on sneaking out of when I run into Mom. She's just stepping out the kitchen, carrying a bottle of ginger ale and a carton of orange juice to top off the punch bowl at the kids' table. Both of us startle so badly that I jump in response, whacking my head on the corner of a picture frame hanging on the wall, and she drops the carton of orange juice. Luckily, it doesn't explode and make a mess all over the floor.

"Leo," she says, pressing a hand to her chest. "You scared me."

I'm in a mood, one that makes me want to retort something about her stating the obvious, but I bite my tongue. Mom isn't the reason why I'm in this mood. I have no right to snap at her. "Sorry, Mom," I sigh, leaning down to pick up the carton. "I've got a lot on my mind."

She gives me an empathetic look. "Still no word from Aria?"

I shake my head, taking the bottle of ginger ale from her. If I'm not going to participate in the events and act happy, I might as well do something to help so my mom can party with her best friends and have a good time. I begin to turn around, ready to complete the job and then maybe find something else to do, like sweep up some of the hay that's been scattered across the floor, when I feel Mom's hand wrap around my arm.

"Leo, honey," she says softly. "What are you doing?"

I turn around and shrug. "Completing the tasks you've been handling all night so you can party with Aunty Tenille and Uncle Kit."

Mom takes the carton and bottle away from me and walks back into the kitchen for a moment. Instead of coming out with them, she returns to the hallway with a plate of leftover wedding cake and tells me to follow her outside.

"What about the punch?" I ask.

Mom waves me off. "The kids' punch can wait. You and I need to talk."

I know there's no point in arguing with her, so I follow her out into the warm summer evening air. We're greeted by the smell of freshly cut grass and the sound of crickets chirping and frogs croaking. I'm suspecting that Mom and I are just going to sit on the back porch and have our little chat, but she keeps walking. We go down the steps and across the yard, only stopping when we come to the barn wood fence. At the fence, Mom hands me the plate of cake and climbs atop, patting the empty space next to her. I follow suit. 

Once we're situated, Mom removes the plastic wrap from the cake and withdraws two forks from the pocket of her dress. She hands one to me and we both dig into the cake. If there's one thing I absolutely know I inherited from my dad, it's my love of cake. I especially love to mash it together with the icing, sort of like a cake-pop, and eat it until I feel sick to my stomach. Which is probably something I'm going to end up doing due to the current situation I'm stuck in.

"So," Mom finally says after a couple of bites. "You want to tell me what exactly happened between you and Aria?"

I stare at the cake on my fork, inspecting the strawberries and vanilla buttercream before shoving it in my mouth. At this point, I'm not even enjoying the cake. I'm just eating it because it gives me something to do. "Not really," I mumble through a mouthful of cake. 

I can feel Mom's gaze burning a hole in the side of my head but I refuse to give in. This isn't her problem to deal with and I'm not going to make it her problem. Especially not on a night like tonight. 

"Am I wrong?" Mom asks, brushing a strand of hair from my forehead. "Is this about something more than you and Aria? Because if it's about me and James talking to each other, we've already had this conversation, Leo. James and I are never going to happen, so there's nothing to worry about. "

I sigh, staring at the wildflowers beneath my feet. No matter what, I know I'm going to have to talk. Mom has an affinity for getting the truth out of people. "I know, Mom," I reply. "It's not about you and James. It's about me and Aria. I just don't know what to do. I want to go to her house and force a conversation, but I also don't want to represent a possessive jerk. I also feel like this is partially my fault. Maybe I shouldn't have voiced my anxiety and made her worry about me. That being said, though, I did tell her I was willing to try. What I don't understand is why she would ghost me after everything."

Mom remains silent for several seconds, gazing up at the billions of stars above us. It's a beautiful night, complete with a clear sky, a warm summer breeze, and the crickets chirping. "When Leon first came back to Whistler, I was angry and confused about his decisions. For the first couple of weeks, I couldn't figure out why, after uprooting himself from my life for seven years, he would come back to me. Even when he told me the reasoning, I still couldn't entirely understand it. He could have texted me, contacted me over Facebook, or even called me within that seven-year timeframe. But he didn't. I know he went through a lot when he lost his mom, but to this day, his decision still puzzles me to some degree."

When Mom pauses, I take that as my opportunity to butt in. "I don't mean to sound entitled, but how does that relate to my problem in any way?"

Mom glances at me, an amused smile on her lips. "I'm getting there. Patience."

"Sorry," I say. 

She bumps her shoulder against mine. "What I'm trying to say, Leo, is that people make crazy decisions when they're in love with someone. When your father got the wedding invitation, he knew he had to do something; he knew that we shared a connection that would never fully subside." She glances up at me. "Aria knows that you two have a connection. And that's why my story relates to your situation. While Leon felt our relationship was threatened by the wedding invitation, Aria probably feels as though your relationship is being threatened by the pressure of the media. Both of them, although their decisions can be viewed as reckless and selfish, are simply trying to protect the person they love, to preserve that relationship. Leon wanted me to know he still loved me, despite the fact that his timing was awful. And Aria is only trying to protect you. Tell me if I'm wrong, but she said something about stealing your life from you, didn't she?"

I nearly drop my fork. "How the hell do you do that?" I ask in disbelief. "How do you figure out stuff without me telling you?"

A smile splits Mom's face. "First of all, I've been talking to Rosa. She's quite the lovely lady to drink wine with if you ask me. Secondly, I saw the video. And, if you watch closely, you can see that Aria is focused on you the whole time, suffocating from guilt." She reaches out and wipes away a speck of icing from the corner of my mouth. "Finally, you're my son. I can read you like a magazine, Leo."

I roll my eyes. "Of course you can." I pull my bottom lip between my teeth and rub the back of my neck. "Has Rosa, uh, said anything about Aria? Is she okay?"

"That," Mom says. "Is something you should ask her, Leo."

I blink, staring at her. "Are you suggesting that I hop in the truck, drive down there, and knock on the door?"

Mom taps her bottom lip. "You said it. Not me."

Godammit. 

Again, I roll my eyes. "You scare me sometimes."

"It's my job," Mom laughs. "You would have gotten away with so much shit had I not scared you sometimes. Stop rolling your eyes at me, young man. You've been doing that for years. If you haven't found your brain by now, then you clearly don't have one." 

"Wouldn't surprise me," I mutter, running a hand through my hair. "I haven't been thinking clearly lately."

She pats me on the back. "That's fine. Love is anything but platonic, Leo. It will mess you up in the best possible way. It will put you through pain and sorrow. It will build character and give you experiences you'll never be able to forget. Love is chaotic. But in the end, it's worth it. The good times and the bad times, it's worth it. So go, Leo. Go to Aria's house and talk to her. I know the two of you can work this out. Do you know why?"

I shake my head.

"Because," Mom smiles, "you have a stubborn heart just like your father did. And he would be so proud to know that. Your last name may be Sangster, but you carry Saint-Laurent blood in your veins, too. Go to Aria."

It's hard to stop myself from smiling at my mom, and I'm already exhausted from tonight's celebration and my mood, so I don't bother attempting to. Without thinking twice, I pull Mom into a hug. "Thank you," I whisper. 

She tightens the hug, balancing the plate of cake on her lap. "I'll do anything for you, Leo. Don't ever forget that."

It's hard to believe it, but within the next ten minutes, I'm on the road and heading for Aria's house. My anxiety is slowly creeping towards the surface, but I shove it down, allowing Mom's words to replay in my mind. I have a stubborn heart just like my dad did. Whatever happens tonight, Aria and I are going to make this work. Somehow, I'm going to convince her I can find a way to push past this media drama. I have to. 

I have to because what we have is just too good to give up.