I have been writing this for months and months and I'm so excited to finally be sharing the last chapter of Annalise's story. It's the longest thing I've ever written and I really hope you all enjoy. Let me know what you think. :)

January 1967

Leesha and I were graduating college later on this year, and even though it was a school day, we were both still in our dorms. Leesha and I laid in each other's arms, laying in between the two twin beds that we had pushed together. We were parked in front of our tiny black and white TV, our eyes glued to the screen. They had finally done it. After years and years of being a minority, a hated group, interracial marriages had finally been legalized. I don't think I'd ever seen Leesha so happy, even if she never acted like she was discriminated by.

That guy wouldn't let her buy gas there? Fine. She can't get some food before class at that restaurant before class? She'd say okay, then walk out and find a place that would serve her. Over the past few years it has been happening less, but when it did she'd just smile through the embarrassment and own it.

Leesha was a black, lesbian woman who was in one of the nicest colleges in the area, where most didn't judge her by her skin color, sexuality, or gender so she was happy. How could she not be? The environment we were in allowed her to own and be herself, and that was all she'd ever asked for. She felt that she was luckier than most, and I felt lucky to be laying next to her.

"This is a big day, baby. Not just for me, or for blacks, but for everyone. It's gonna go down in history," she said, smiling. I kissed her, just happy that she was happy.

Watching the TV, I realized something. We had seen MLK Jr. speak to the world, and all odds beat when he won the Nobel Peace Prize, as the youngest man, and only third black man to ever receive it. We watched as the Civil Rights Act of '64 as it passed, but even that didn't even seem as important in comparison. To the rest of the country, it was everything, but to us, it was just a start.

I remember the smile she had on her face as the Civil Rights Act passed. The look when MLK won the Nobel Peace Prize. "I want to be like him. I wanna speak out," she said. That's just what he did. 

"History," I agreed with her, as interracial marriages were passed.

"We're one step closer to us, baby," she said, her eye twinkling as as spoke.

June 12th, 1967

"You ready, love?" Leesha asked me, helping me pull the black gown on my body. I smiled.

"Never been more ready in my life." We both put our caps on, and walked out of our dorms for the last time. Our clothes and belongings were loaded up in the car, ready to go on our next adventure, raising my brothers. We kissed before walking together to the football field for a last hurrah with our classmates. I felt my pocket when we left, to make sure it was still there.

The ceremony took hours, but when they called Leesha's name, I cried. When they called my name, I bawled. I heard my brothers in the stands, cheering me on, huge, proud smiles on their faces. Leesha blew me a kiss. I had never felt better in my life. Wiping the tears from my cheeks, I put a huge smile on my face and walked over to accept my diploma. Thanking them, I walked off towards my girlfriend. I had to talk to her.

"Annalise!" She screamed. I ran over to her, hugging her tightly.

"We did it, baby," she said. I nodded.

"I've got something to ask you, Leesha," I said. She smiled.

"Oh yeah? What's that?" Smiling at her, I got down on one knee, pulling out a ring.

"Leesha Codwell? I would love to propose to you... right here, right now. I want to call you mine forever and ever, but for some stupid ass reason, I can't. I'm not legally allowed to, and honestly, I'm pissed. Completely outraged about it. So I want to ask you to wear a ring. A symbol of you and I, our love. I guess you can call it a promise ring. A promise that as soon as gay marriage is legalized... We'll get married?" I said. My heart beat quickly in my chest, and I wondered if I was having a heart attack. I had practiced it hundreds of times in front of the mirror, making sure it was perfect. Now I wasn't so sure, as I looked up at Leesha. She was in tears, making my eyes well up too.

"Ana, I..." she started. I felt like I was going to throw up.

"I would love to!" I shakily put the ring on her finger, and she jumped into my arms. We both threw our graduation caps off.

April 4th, 1968

Our eyes were glued to the TV for the second time as everything was happening around us, and nothing could be done. Martin Luther King Jr. had been shot.

"It's over," Leesha said, tears cascading down her cheeks faster than I could catch them. I held her.

"It's over," she whispered. Even if I told her that it wasn't, that we could keep going, with or without him, do this on our own, I knew she wouldn't believe me. I didn't know how to comfort her. And in all honesty, she didn't want to be comforted.

This man was an inspiration to not just her, and she knew it. He was taken away from all of us, and for what reason? At what cost? Was she right, was everything over? Everything we'd all been working for? I shook my head.

"It's not over, baby. This is just the beginning." God, was I right.

June 17th, 1969

"I watched the whole thing. I couldn't believe it," Leesha said, speaking to an entire crowd. "It was the worst thing I've ever experienced, really. But that's why I'm up here right now, I guess. A few years ago I told my girlfriend I wanted to be like him. I said I wanted to do my part. I want to fight for what's right and make sure it happens. This is how I'm gonna do it," she told the entire world. She was finally living her dream. I sat in the front row, hooting, hollering, clapping, wiping tears from my eyes. I was so proud of her.

Leesha stopped, breathing in the applause. She smiled, wider and brighter than I'd ever seen. She kept going on with her speech, telling everyone what she thought we should do, how the world could be helped, what we needed to do. People were eating her words, loving everything she had to say.

Leesha came off the stage a while later jumping up and down in excitement. It was the first speech she had read in front of real people, not just me or our bathroom mirror. She ran into my arms, and I engulfed her in a hug.

"Leesh, you were amazing!" I exclaimed. She smiled and I kissed her cheek.

"Ana, that was so much fun," she told me.

"I'm so proud of you, baby."

December 30th, 1969

"You know, Ana... Ponyboy's graduation from High School soon," Leesha said, smiling. I nodded.

"I know, I'm so proud of him." He's  to a senior this year, almost ready to go off to college.

"Baby, you know what that means, right?" I nodded, tears forming in my eyes.

"My baby brother's going off to college," I said, thanking God for student loans and Leesha's great job. God knew that with Darry in school now, we could never completely pay for Ponyboy too.

"Not just that... baby, we're gonna have an empty house, just you and I!" She exclaimed. I smiled, but it was a sad one.

"I never thought about that," I said, softly. She nodded.

"I've been thinking... what if we try for a baby, Ana?" She suggested. I gasped, completely surprised. We had never even talked about kids before, so it was a total shock.

"H-how?" I asked. She smiled.

"Annalise, I want to carry a baby," she told me. Looking into her eyes, I knew this was right. I knew we were ready. Hugging her tightly, I nodded.

July 22nd, 1969

Leesha and I decided to wait until after Ponyboy was graduated to tell everyone. It had been a month since then, Darry came down to see it, Soda, Leesha and I were all there, crying the whole time. Dally and Johnny were there, smiling proudly, with Two-Bit, who had graduated two years prior, alongside them. We were so proud of our brother, and we didn't want to take the focus off of him with our news.

We'd been looking into this process for a few months now, and had tried three times. After the first two times, we had started to get worried, but this time worked. Leesha was three months pregnant. We had called the entire gang, my three brothers, Two-Bit, Dally, Johnny and Steve all over to tell them the news.

"Guys, I have something to tell you guys... We do, I mean," I said. Everyone looked up at us.

"Are you dying, Ana?" I laughed. That was the same thing he had said to me so long ago... It was almost five years now, and it felt like a lifetime.

"No, Two-Bit, I'm not dying." I looked at Leesha. "Get up here, baby. This is your news." She got up and took my hand, moving it to her stomach, which had just started rounding. I smiled.

"What's going on?" Ponyboy asked, but I was sure he knew.

"I'm pregnant!" Leesha exclaimed. I looked at her, smiling, with the most proud look I had ever given, at her. Darry and Soda cheered. Ponyboy was laughing. I knew he was excited to be an uncle. Darry came up and hugged both of us.

"I'm so happy for you guys," he said.

"Thanks, Uncle Darry," Leesh said, patting her stomach.

"I thought you were just fat," Two-Bit spoke. We all laughed.

"When are you due, Leesha?" Sodapop asked. She smiled at my little brother, and I felt pride in my wife.

"January 14th," she told him, beaming. We spent the day sitting around, talking and laughing, catching up. There was always a hand on Leesha's stomach, whether it was someone trying to feel the baby kick or me, just letting my hand linger there, feeling the baby. Our baby.

Everyone was so happy, they just didn't know that pregnancy wasn't always such a beautiful thing. They said Leesha was glowing, but she wasn't when she was throwing up. Her morning sickness was bad. She wasn't glowing when she got horrible pains in her stomach, ones that she could never tell were normal or not. She always said she was okay, but I wasn't sure. It was exactly why I would never want to carry a baby myself. Leesha had always wanted to, wo as long as she was happy doing it, I was happy with her. I just never realized it could all be for nothing.

August 16th, 1969

Leesha and I laid in bed this morning, trying to sleep. It was early and still dark out, probably around 4 AM when she started moaning and groaning. When I looked at the clock, I immediately knew something was wrong. Her morning sickness didn't usually start until later, and it had been pretty constant up until now.

"You okay, baby?" I asked her, turning over. Tears were steaming down her face, and she was hugging her baby bump tight. She was pale and her face was scrunched up, and just looked like she was in pain. She could barely get a word out as well.

"Hurts," she mumbled. That was all.

"What hurts, love?" I asked her. I wasn't totally sure what to do in this situation, but I can tell you I was completely terrified, and it only got worse when she pointed to her stomach. 

"Should I call an ambulance?" She burst out sobbing, barely getting her nod in. I grabbed the phone and held my girlfriend tight.

"It's gonna be okay, Leesha. Don't worry," I told her. Man, was I wrong.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Leesha went through tons of tests that day, some that I'd never even heard of. From Ultrasounds and CT scans, to blood work and things I couldn't pronounce if I tried. I called Darry at about 7 AM and asked him to come wait with me and he was there in less than an hour.

Finally, at around 9 AM, a nurse came to get me.

"Annalise Curtis?" The nurse asked. I stood up immediately.

"Leesha's asking for you. We have some news that we'd like you to hear together," she told me. I looked to Darry, who said he'd stay out there, but I could come get him if I needed him.

"What's the news?" I asked as soon as I was in her room. Looking in her eyes, I knew she didn't know either. And she was terrified.

"You may want to sit down for this, Annalise," the nurse said. Leesha patted a spot on the bed next to her, and I sat down. She laid her head on my shoulder and we held hands, looking at the nurse, who was holding a clipboard.

"Unfortunately... Leesha has lost the baby. She had a miscarriage," we were told solemnly. I took a deep breath, not knowing what to do now. This had to be a mistake. It couldn't be real. As soon as I looked at Leesha, she started bawling. And that's when it hit me that we had just lost our child. Burying my face in her arms, I silently cried too.

May 18th, 1970

It took us almost a year to get over the loss of the first baby, and in time we tried twice more. The first time she didn't even get pregnant. The second barely lasted two months. We couldn't figure out why they just couldn't seem to survive. We didn't dare tell the gang we were trying again, not yet anyways. We were still m distraught over the last one, and we didn't even know for certain if this would work out. We didn't want to get anyone's hope up yet.

I stayed in home, writing. Invested in my stories. Stories of Leesha and I, stories of our lives and future child, our wedding, doing things that had never been heard of in this world. Beating the odds and the rules that other people had put up for us to follow.

We had had Darry give everyone the news that the first baby didn't make it. Soda and Pony had cried. It was hard losing someone that meant so much to you before you had even met them. My brothers had lost their first niece or nephew before they were even born, and none of us could imagine something more heartbreaking.

Leesha cried to me. "I just want a baby," she would say. I would rub her back and tell her that I knew, and I did too. But nothing we could do could get us one. Neither of us wanted to adopt, and I never had interest in carrying my own. We both knew that Leesha needed to do it herself, or there was no baby for us.

Finally, after Leesha had had few days off from work, think to think, we decided to see what was really wrong. We made a doctors appointment for them to run more tests on her. And we found out everything. I couldn't help but cry when they first told us, but I don't think she fully processed what was happening.

When they told Leesha that she was fighting a deadly disease, one that caused her to be basically infertile, she just stared at the doctor, not saying a word.

They told us they didn't know much about this disease. They knew so little in fact, that only a few people suffered from it, and it wasn't even named yet. They told us it was why she couldn't keep the baby, because she was almost infertile. That her body couldn't safely house the baby. If one was born, it would have serious birth defects. And that even though we wanted one, we should stop trying, because the consequences could be dire. She could die anyways, they told me in private, and there was no treatment or cure for this. I was devastated, and scared. I could lose everything, after already losing a child.

April 12th, 1973

We got tired of our empty nest after a while. With Darry finishing his last year old college and Pony and Soda in their own places, we were all alone. I was writing, putting my everything into a story I didn't know if it were possible to get published. Leesha did her thing, but started to stay home a little more as she started getting more sick. She got thinner, she ate less. She still couldn't carry a baby, not that we tried, and I still didn't want to.  But I wanted a baby, and I knew she did too, so that was the day I suggested adoption.

February 23rd, 1974

We were more than a few months into the adoption process, almost a year, when I finally realized something was wrong. Leesha spent less and less time at home, having me fill out the paperwork and documents while she was at work, only taking days off when I needed her. I missed her, but I figured she was just trying to save up as much money as possible for the baby.

It all started when I gave her the next appointment date.

"I can't do that one," she said immediately. I asked her why. She shrugged.

"I, uh... Think I have a conference that day," she told me. I sighed.

"This is a really important date, Leesh, the last one," I explained to her, hoping we wouldn't have to reschedule. We might have had to wait months before another spot opened.

"I can't do it," she said, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly before standing up.

"Leesha?" I asked her. "What's wrong, baby?" Something seemed off, I just didn't know what.

"Hmm?" She responded, absentmindedly. "Oh, nothing, babe." I gave her a funny look.

"Are you sure?" I guided her to the couch. She nodded.

"Are you looking forward to the new baby?" I asked her, hoping for an honest answer. She nodded, not saying a word.

"Tell me what you're thinking, Leesha," I begged. I didn't want to pry, but I knew I had to.

"I don't want to sound selfish," she admitted. I put my arm around her.

"You won't. Just tell me." She took a deep, nervous breath.

"I... I told you a while back I wanted a baby of my own... but then I was so desperate for a little one to take care of..." Her voice trailed off as she started crying. I held her in my arms.

"I wanted one so bad, I decided we should adopt, that I'd be okay with it. But Ana, the more I think about it, the more I don't think it's the best idea," she said. She tried to catch her breath as she apologized over and over.

"I'm sorry, Ana. I'm so sorry, baby. I'm sorry.  I hope you're not mad. I love you so much, Annalise. I'm so sorry, I hope you understand where I'm coming from... I'm sorry, baby. I love you. Please don't hate me." It went on for a little while and I tried to quietly shush her while I rubbed her back, but it wouldn't work.

"It's okay, baby. I understand. You wanted your own. I get it." She wouldn't respond.

"I'm not mad at you. And I agree. I want a baby, but I want it to be ours," I told her.

"You don't think I'm selfish?" She asked. I shook my head, kissing her.

"Not at all, love." And I gave up the process, because it was what she wanted.

October 12, 1977

Ponyboy got married to a beautiful girl on this day. Her name was Emily, and they met when Two-Bit took the whole gang to Disneyland a year before. Ponyboy, curious about things the rest of us weren't, had gone off on his own to look around, when he met the beautiful girl. She had short blonde hair and beautiful eyes, and he was head over heels the second he met the girl. They made the perfect couple, and ended up having two children a year apart. Brianna Mae Curtis, who looked exactly like her mother, and Donna Anne Curtis, who looked a lot like her father. They were the first Curtis children of our generation, my first nieces. When Pony moved back to Tulsa after they were born, wanting them to grow up in the school system he was in, Sodapop did too. He had moved into the city shortly after Ponyboy had graduated, working in an office. We were proud, but he was bored. He loved the girls like his own, and moved back the first chance he got, watching them every day while their parents were at work.

July 5th, 1980

This was the day Darry got married. He had met a sweet girl whom he met at his college, Serena, with short with brown hair and green eyes, who became my sister-in-law. They had a few classes together, and studied together often. Their ceremony was short, sweet and beautiful, and they went on a weeklong honeymoon. A year after the wedding, they had triplets: a boy named Tyler James, and two girls: Teresa Marie and Eleanor Lee.

December 8th, 1983

The next wedding was Sodapop. He married Samantha, and they moved in together, buying a small apartment. Soda had gotten his job back at the gas station a while back, and was now a manager. Sam and Soda had five children, Ashton John, the oldest, the twins: Gina Marie, Nancy Shea, their little boy: Michael Pete, and their youngest, Jackie Bea, who they called Bean.

June 15th, 1987

Our 20 year College reunion was on this day, and it was great. I had no idea it had been this long, it didn't seem like it. So much had happened in the past few years, it was hard to believe it had been so much time since my girlfriend and I had first met.  Leesha and I were getting older, and it was scary to think about.

With everything going on the past few years from planning weddings, helping babysitting the kids, our 10 nieces and nephews, Leesha's medical appointments and working, we hadn't had much time to think about adoption or kids of our own anymore.

Everyone complimented Leesha on her job and how successful she'd become, and I was so proud. I was so glad to be there with her. Not many people knew we were together, and we told everyone. We kissed in front of our whole class, and we were proud. We talked to everyone, listened to talk about husbands and wives, best friends from school who they still saw, and children.

It was more than a bit upsetting to hear about, my jealously getting the best of me. Some had kids already grown up and in college themselves, some had little tykes just learning to walk.

I saw Ella, she was married to a man a few years younger than us named Brad. She told me she was happy for Leesha and I, and I gave her a hug. She told me it was nice to seem me after all this time, and she was sorry for what she was like in her youth. We exchanged phone numbers and promised to keep in touch.

I stuck by Leesha's side the whole time. I didn't have many friends back then, but it was nice to see everyone again. She made a point of saying hi to everyone, and everyone seemed thrilled to see her. She had every guy and even some girls head over heels over her in high school, and as I held her hand, I realized how thrilled I was to be there with her.

May 17th, 2004

Leesha and I laid in bed one morning, watching the news like we did every day when we woke up . We were getting older, and we wondered if we would ever get the chance we promised each other we would. The chance to get married.

Leesha's health had been slowly declining, more and more every day. We hadn't tried for another baby, she was too old at this point, anyways, and she still didn't want to adopt. We didn't regret as much as we probably should have. I told her every day how much I loved her, fearing the worst could happen at any day. That's why I was so thrilled today.

When we first saw the announcement, we both sat there, stunned. Leesha pulled me into her frail arms and we cried the happiest tears we'd ever had. Massachusetts had legalized Gay Marriage. She looked at me.

"What does it mean?" She asked me. I smiled at her.

"It means we start planning the wedding."

June 12th, 2005

We planned the wedding for this day, the exact date I proposed to her, years and years ago. We all flew to Massachusetts, and had the most beautiful day of my whole life, with a gorgeous ceremony. I wore a white dress and so did Leesha. Darry gave me away and the rest of the gang was there, most of them in the ceremony. It had been years since we were all together, and it felt wonderful. All of my nieces and nephews were there.

Leesha and I said our vows, holding each other's hands as tears streamed down our cheeks. And when they finally told us, "You may kiss the bride," we had the most passionate kiss of our lives.

Our first dance lasted forever, or at least, it could have and I would have been happy. We danced to our favorite song, with my head on her shoulder, both of us smiling, not a care in the world.

"I love you, Leesha," I told her.

"I love you too, Annalise."

August 27th, 2006

The day Leesha passed away, the worst of my life. We'd been expecting it for a while, even her, but I of course never wanted it to come. It happened in her sleep, and she went peacefully, her hand in mine. I cried for a little while before calling 911 and then my brothers. The love of my life was gone. My brothers planned the funeral, and I don't remember a minute of it. I cried through the whole thing. I miss her like crazy every single day.

I couldn't describe exactly what I was feeling throughout that time. It was lost, it was sad and scared, and for the first time in forever, completely and totally alone. Like a part of me was missing.

June 26th, 2015

This was the day Gay Marriage was legalized all over the USA. It was the thing we'd been waiting for forever and ever. Since Leesha and I were children, basically. I went to her grave that day, a beautiful headstone, in the shade by a tree overlooking a little lake. It was perfect. I sat there for a while talking to her, telling her that it had finally happened, and I was so proud. I just wished she was there to see it. I told her that I had finally finished my novel, after all these years. I had finally figured out how to end it. And it was just like this. I just wished she could have been there to read it...