Tommy,Tom or Thomas?
Tom.

(Newt)

"I love you. We do. You'll be safe. Safe from everything,soon. I promise."

Those were the words my father told my mother. I heard him say them on her death bed. Where we had to sit there day after day watching her die and there was nothing I could do about it.
There was nothing I could do about Tommy either. A boy I had to hide my feelings from,he was perfect so he wasn't made for me.

I truly do believe in soul-mates. So we're obviously not meant for one another.

In school I walk along the hall to see Tommy there. His eyes lock on mine and I feel that warm feeling in my chest as I try to hold in my tears. I used to have a friend and she told me she lost the girl she loved. She told me it hurt her more than anything in the entire world and there was nothing she felt like she was strong enough to do;all she could do was watch the girl love someone else. I didn't want to end up like that.

"Newt..." Thomas walks up to me and I smile weakly "Newt. It's okay. I've got the message,I'll cope,"
"You... You will?"
"I guess I'll have to,"

I smile slightly and he smiles back-
"You don't wanna bunk off today do you?" I ask "Go to yours?"
"I'd love that Newt..."

So we walk back to his and of course I know the place off by heart. It feels that way anyway. We sit in his room with each other,hands almost touching but none of us brave enough to make the first move. Not like last night then... 

"Tommy. I think,we should talk anyway,"
"Talk then.." He mumbles.
"I do like you-"
"Newt I'm a grenade," his lips purse together "I don't even know why. But one day I'm going to explode,destroy everything in my wake. And,I don't wanna hurt you,"

I look down and shake my head; he didn't know that I'd consider it to be a privilege to have my heart broken by him.

"Tommy... You can't give up. I won't let you,"
"I hope so..." He whispers and rests his head on my shoulder as I stroke his hair. I'm about to speak to him when my phone rings,it's my grandfather

"Hello?" I say.
"Hi. I just wanted to check up on you..."
"Yeah,yeah. I'm... At school," I lie.
"Good. I want you to know that you can always see me,whenever you want. I'm thinking of you,Newton,"

A smile stretches across my lips "I'm thinking of you too.."

I hang up and turn to Tommy who sits there playing with his hands. I stroke his cheek softly.
"Listen Thomas, I have to get home to get a few things. I'll be back soon. I promise,"
"Okay..." He whispers gently. I smile at him and walk to the door and run home. My dad's not in so I grab a bag and fill it with my stuff. I then write him a note-

I'm sorry it had to be like this. I'm sorry I'm running away like she did,maybe that's what she needed. A break from life,not from living.
I met a boy dad. Yes a boy. I love him and that's why I'm running.

I'm sorry.
From Newt.

I wipe my eyes and look at my old house then the photo of me,dad and mum. I pick it up and kiss it gently-
"I love you," I smile and start to cry "Please come back! Come back to tell me why you left."

I dry my eyes,having to pretend like nothing happened as I make my way back to Thomas',opening up the door as I walk into his room. He sits there like a ragged doll,looking down as I see his room has been completely thrashed. Obviously by him of course. 

"You okay?" I ask but he stays silent. I kneel down "Tommy?" He doesn't respond. But I know he's alive and breathing just fine. "Let's just sort this out..." I begin to clean everything up and I sit him on the bed "Just sleep," I lie him down and stroke his hair softly.

"Don't go Newt..." He whimpers.
"I'll never leave you," I squeeze his hand softly as his eyes close. I wipe my eyes again for the second time today as I look ahed. He was broken... My Tommy was broken. How could I fix this?  The one thing I knew was that I wouldn't let this happen again. Nothing like my mothers case.

~

I lie there for hours waiting for him to wake up. Of course he eventually does.

"Hey," I smile as he smiles a weak one back. Gently getting up but immediately curling back up into my embrace "You're okay Tommy..."
"I am?"
"Of course..."

At that moment I felt like bursting into tears. Screaming and shaking him until he fixed back together... I scream now for everything that has gone wrong. I scream for everything broken in our lives. That's an awful lot.