"Aur tum chah bhe nahi saktay,
Agar Allah na chahey."
(And you cannot even desire,
if Allah doesn't desire it.) -- (Holy Quran)

Mina's POV:

"We have to do an ultrasound to rule out an ectopic pregnancy..."

"No, this isn't an ectopic case. Her last checkup confirmed a healthy foetus.."

I slowly come awake in a hospital bed, to find Shehzer and George in deep conversation with my Obstetrician, Dr. Neera Singh.

My hand automatically went to my stomach. Are you okay, Bean? Please be okay! I can't lose you...

"My Bean?..." I croak weakly. Shehzer's immediately by my side, brushing his lips against my forehead. I wince away from his touch.

"Our Bean is okay, love. Alhamdolillah! (Thanks to Allah)" He is hoarse with exhaustion, and worry. "Bleeding isn't uncommon in the first trimester. Your case was worse because you have a blood clotting issue. It's a good thing we came here on time, or else..." He visibly shudders when he tried imagining the horrible alternative.

My intense relief is marred by worry for my husband. He looks awful. I try to squash the despair. He doesn't deserve my sympathy.

"I-I thought I lost h-him." I start bawling hysterically, remembering the blood. So much blood...
Shehzer looks devastated at my tears, his fist keeps clenching, and unclenching with helplessnes.

He seriously needs to work on his comforting technique. I hold out both my arms towards him, "HOLD ME! You jerk!"

He sighs with relief as he obeys me. I cry harder when I realize how much I missed his smell, his arms, his warmth around me.

"I still hate you." I sobbed, burying me face in his neck. He nods, tightening his arms around me.

"I know, baby. I know... I deserve it." he whispers. "But I promise, I'll try to make it up to you."

The doctors made me stay for 48 hours. They wanted to confirm the diagnosis, and keep me under observation. I was given multiple shots, prenatal vitamins big enough to choke hippos, and a laundry list of stuff I was no longer allowed to do.

"Don't bend over too much. Take it easy with the yoga regimen...iron supplements are your new best friend!" Dr. Singh lectured. Shehzer was busy planning my medicine schedules. He was exhausted, yet happy somehow. I was confused at his change of heart, refusing to accept the flowers and truffle boxes he was piling next to my bed.

EMV sneered at the lovely lilac and baby's breath bouquet next to me, "Flowers and chocolates are like a guilt tax...you squeeze him dry sister!"

Rania, and Mariam Auntie kept me.company most of the time. George dropped by with some stolen Doritos that I was suddenly craving. I was rarely alone at all, and Shehzer's attitude made me nervous to be with him. How can I trust anything he says anymore?

I pretended to sleep whenever we were alone, and I didn't speak a word once we were discharged after a final checkup.

"Minnie. Talk to me, please?" He stroked my hair, expertly handling the steering wheel with one hand. I was looking out of the passenger-side window, ignoring the treacherous thrill that I always felt at his nearness.

"Don't call me Minnie. I feel like a kid when you do that." I muttered tonelessly back, still refusing to turn to him, "And we all know how much you hate my immaturity."

His hand dropped away from my hair, "I don't hate anything about you. I was being a weak, scared little idiot when I said those things. I swear, if I could undo any single moment spent with you. It'd be that one..."

I shrug disinterestedly at that.

"...You're not going to be like regular mothers Mina. You'll be special. Different. Because that's who you are. If being adorably kiddish makes you, you. I don't want to change anything about that. Our kid will end up being supercool either way,"

EMV is on alert, 'Did I just notice the ice melting? Stay strong woman! Don't you dare give him what he wants!'

Once we reached home, he was out of the car in a flash, opening doors, helping (read: carrying) me past the lobby stairs. Thank God we had an elevator for our sixth floor condo, because climbing stairs daily was a big no-no in my condition.

"I-uh, I have a suprise for you." Shehzer hesitated before turning the key to our place. He looked so nervous, and adorable, I almost kissed him. He kept messing up his hair, which was uncharacteristically scruffy.

I just narrowed my eyes, and huffed petulantly, instead.

Once he opened the door, everything looked the same. My snowglobe collection on the foyer mantle, the mini string art gallery I had arranged for our dining area. My sun-room was the same as I left it, my teacup project half-painted, with half-dried paints lying where I tossed them in my haste to call for help, two days ago.

I shuddered, re-imagining the awful moment when I thought I had lost my Bean. I honestly thought I'd never smile again if that happened.

"It's the second guest room, love." His deep voice murmured in my ear, hesitantly pulling me along.

I gasped when he opened the door. It was a baby room. There was a tiny pink laced-up cradle, surrounded by a blue set of wardrobes, changing tables, and what seemed like the entire contents of a Toys-R-Us aisle. The walls were readied with thick canvas paper.

"I figured you'd wanna paint the walls yourself." He was practically eating away at his lips with nervousness, "I got us some baby-safe paints, and low-rise stools for you, so you don't have to bend down too much. I know I suck at drawing, but I'll help you paint it, if you want..."

"What's with the color scheme?" I gestured towards the mix of pink and blue.

"What? Don't tell me we're raising Bean on sexual stereotypes?" He grinned teasingly at me. I bit my lip to stop the smile threatening to escape.

"It's cute. Except, you're not coming near the artsy wall painting parts. I haven't forgotten the last time you tried helping me with my project," I state as nonchalantly as I can.

"As you wish, love." He looks longingly at me, "Can I kiss you now?"

"Don't push it," I snort back heartlessly. "I'm hungry. I think I'd love some omelette." I stare pointedly at him, until he disappears towards the kitchen.

I yawn tiredly, heading towards our bedroom. I debate sleeping in the guest room, but honestly, our bed is more comfy, and I missed it.

"Mina, wake up. I got you your omelette," Shehzer kisses my temple gently. I sit up in bed, sniffing moodily at the perfect golden egg on a tray. He even cut my bread slice corners for me.

"I don't want to eat it anymore," I blink up at him.
He looks hurt, and kind of annoyed, "But you said you wanted some."

"Yeah, well, times change." I shrug.

"It was ten minutes ago! You said you'd love some!"

"I don't care. I don't want it anymore. You of all people should understand that. One minute we say we love something. The next minute we'd rather not eat it, because I don't know...the omelette was stupid enough to miss a morning-after Pill," I pulled Simba closer to me after delivering this hormone-riddled speech.

He was quiet for a while. Sighing defeatedly, "I guess I deserved that too. I don't mind the omelette, love. Please just eat something. Can I make something else for you? Would you like some watermelon? I got you strawberries, and black currants too. You need to eat iron-rich stuff..."

"I think I want pan-cakes," I glanced wickedly at Shehzer.

He chuckles back, "If this one's another pointed speech theatrics, I might just kiss you for it," his eyes darkened with emotion, "I missed you..."

"Seriously, Shehzer. Get me pancakes. And don't go easy on the maple syrup. I love that stuff," I ordered him. This guilt trip kind of rocks.

After dinner, and a bath I curled up with my kindle, clicking to my Narnia collection. I read out loud to Bean every night. Sometimes I'd read the Arabic version of the Holy Quran out loud (Kulsoom Nani swore that when she did it during her own pregnancy, her kid turned out "taller, smarter, more obedient than the rest of his idiotic midget siblings"-her words, not mine!), and sometimes, I'd read out good literature. No Sweet child O' mine was growing up on Twilight and Divergent.

"Hmm. So where were we Bean? Did we get to Aslan's return yet?" I whispered to him. I could feel him stir sometimes now. Or maybe it was just all the maple syrup I was addicted to....

"Ahem." Shehzer exited the bathroom, shirtless and grinning like an idiot, wearing just his boxer shorts, towelling his wet hair.
"So, Bean likes C.S. Lewis, huh?"

"We'll just ignore him, until he goes away." I muttered under my breath, trying not to eyeball my husband's drool-worthy upper-torso.

"He isn't going anywhere. Not anymore. Not ever," he replied firmly, climbing into bed with me. I angrily swiped a page. "Now, I know you're angry with me, for good reason, and I doubt you're up for a conversation, so I won't bother you. You can go to sleep if you like. Or keep on reading...but I think it's high time Bean and I got acquainted."

I glared at him as he leaned down towards my baby bump, an adoring smile on his face.

"Assalamualikum, Bean. How are you doing in there? Hope the weather's good! You know you scared us for a bit there buddy. Don't do that again, your Mommy hates needles..." He kept on talking, heedless of the havoc he was playing on my heart.
"...You should know that your Daddy looks very mean, and badass, but the truth is, he gets scared pretty easily. You scared him, Bean. He was so scared of you, he forgot to tell you that he loved you. Don't be like him, kay? Be like your Mom, she's braver than Aslan. Also, she's pretty hot, so you'll have to be beautiful too...no pressure though!"

"You were a surprise for us. A surprise gift! Now, you should know that Mommy loves surprises, no matter how much she complains about them. I don't think either of us have a choice, but to love you," he pauses to stroke the bare skin under my Wolverine T-shirt, "I didn't think it was possible to love someone more than I love your Mom, but you surprised me again. I love the very idea of you, Bean..."
He spoke about mistakes, love, bravery and pretty much everything he had wanted to say since our fight. I quietly listened, unable to stem the happy tears. I didn't say anything, despite his pointed teasing.

"...Hmm, so as much as I love your name, I don't think we can call you after a plant seed. I was thinking, if you're a boy...and if we name you Shahrukh, you can be Shahrukh Khan! Sound good?" He shot me a grin, after placing a soft kiss over Bean.

I burst like a bubble.

"The hell we will!" I yell at him, "You're not naming my baby after Bollywood stars!"

"Oh, yeah? Who'll stop me?" He laughed, "You'll be pumped up on pain meds love, I'll be the one filling out name forms. Also, there are other options; what about Chingez? Or Imran?..."

"Jackass!" I flicked his ear, and he winced. I started giggling uncontrollably as an insane idea hit me, "Oh my God! Shehzer! Jackass, and The BEANstalk! Ha. Ha! We could be a movie!" I doubled over with silent howls.

He groaned at that, "Argh! Mina! You know I can't help it when you crack lame jokes. That's it! You have to kiss me now." I squealed as he hoisted me over to his lap, staring straight into my eyes.

"Please?" He looked so hopeful, so adorably anxious, I knew I didn't stand a chance.
Sorry. I mouthed to EMV,
She sighed, 'Go ahead. his forearms are distracting me...'

"Promise not to hurt me again?" I whispered to him, cupping his cheeks.

"I promise." He leaned to rest his forehead against mine, "And you promise to forgive me, even if I unwittingly do?"

I nodded. I liked that he was keeping it real. We had our whole lives ahead of us, and I know we'll have ups and downs. They're normal, healthy even.

His mouth on mine felt like home to me. After months apart, we were starving for each other.

I broke away from him, causing him to grumble, and move onto my neck instead, "Shehzer? He can't hear us? Can he...?" I asked worriedly.

He started vibrating with laughter at that, gasping, for breath. "Mina. Baby...never change, please!"

"Excuse me for trying not scar the poor kid before birth!"

"Mmhm." He chuckled, swooping down for another peck "Somehow, I think he'll do just fine."

......

Shehzer's POV: (five months later)

"How do fathers bear this pain? It's unimaginable..." I muttered worriedly to George.

She rolls her eyes and hands me a Dr. Pepper, "Drink this. You look ready to swoon"

"Hmmph! And why earth HE wanted to go inside is beyond me. My husband could never imagine setting foot inside the birthing room, the very idea was scandalous in our day!" Kulsoom Nani booms out from her perch on the waiting area. She had been apparently visiting her daughter in New York, and decided to drop by for a week. So far, she hasn't bothered heading for NY, it seems like she had an intuition Mina'd be heading for an early delivery.

I grit my teeth as I can still hear Mina's yells of pain, interspersed with assorted, creative swear words. Most of the curses are directed at me.

I rub my face tiredly, "I'm never touching her again..."

"HE IS NEVER FREAKING TOUCHING ME AGAIN!" she'll wake up the dead at this pitch.

"Go back inside Shehzer, she calms down when you're near." Mina's Mom urges me. She looks exhausted by her travel, and sleepless night we have had so far. She arrived here after Mina's admittance. I had to reluctantly send George to pick her up from the airport. My wife seemed to relax a bit when she saw her mother. She didn't know that Adiba had traveled for this too, we had decided to surprise her with the information after the baby's arrival.

"Yeah, only because she can yell at me at closer distance when I'm inside." I groan inwardly, moving back inside.

She looks terrible. Beautiful, but terrible. She growls at me when I approach her, "YOU! You did this to me! HOLY CRUDGBALLS ON MACARONI! END THIS ALREADY!"

I hold her hand, murmuring encouragement, "Just a little bit more love, you're almost there."

"LIAR! FILTHY LIAR!" She sobs, "YOU SAID THAT HOURS AGO! YOU LIZARD POOP!"

"Hey, hey...just think about Bean, okay? He or She is just so excited about this! Imagine it sliding down a-well, a slip-n-slide?" I cringed at my reference.

Thinking about Bean helped her situation. Her Mom popped in now and then, to recite prayers for her. I just helplessly allowed her to fracture my fingers with the hand holding.

When Bean finally arrived, we were in for a shock.

"It's-she's a beanie?" Mina slurred with pain and exhaustion. I could only stare in wonder at the screaming, bloody bundle in my arms. "Don't hog her, you jerk! I want to see!"

I hurriedly placed her against Mina's chest. I kissed both of them gently, they looked heartbreakingly gorgeous in that moment. Mina started weeping when our little girl quieted down as soon as she was in her Mom's arms. "She's so beautiful, Shehzer!"

I didn't even realize I was crying until my vision blurred. I quickly swiped away at the tears; couldn't bear not to see my family even for a moment. It was like my entire existence so far had paled in comparison to this. I think my heart just expanded, solely to allow me to love her as she deserved. It just felt right somehow, and it felt like I could conquer the world, for this tiny person.

She opened her tiny eyes right then, staring wonderingly at me. My eyes. Mine. I'm not sure, but I think she smiled at me. My heart just melted. I knew I was in deep trouble. I'll be wrapped around her tiny fingers now.

"Mina. You always said I kept saving you...I think you saved me this time." I kissed her again with gratitude, "Thank you for her. Thank you."

"I love you two so much. It feels weird. What sort of happy pills did they give me?" Mina stroked the baby's mop of brown hair. "She's uh...she's okay, right?" Mina gave me a worried glance.

She knows how the idea of a DNS baby had haunted me. When I first told her about my fears months ago, Mina was so strong about the whole thing, I started believing we'd be all right.

"If Allah sees fit to give us someone like Rania, how on earth can I love him/her any less?" She had stroked my face, "I refuse to let a chromosome decide how much I love my baby. Are you with me on this?"

"As long as I am breathing, love. I'm with you." I had fallen a little bit more for her in that moment. It happened quite a lot, you see.

I reassure her now, as our baby was whisked away to be cleaned and swathed in blankets, "She's perfect Minnie. Just like you."

I thought about the first time I saw Mina all those years ago. The second I saw her; I just knew that she was special. She was mine.

Now holding our daughter for the first time, I thank Allah for all those times I almost lost her mother, because they just served to bring us closer. I thank Him for this incredible person He gifted us with.

As I whispered the first Azaan (prayer call) in her ears, she peeked at me from those barely open brown eyes, I stroked her tiny hand, grinning when she grabbed onto the finger. My pinkie was as big as half of her arm.

"Minnie. I think I know just what to call her..."

.......................THE END.......................

A/N:

Omg! It's done! Finito! :')
This is so hard, saying goodbye to my.characters. Hope you guys are satisfied with the outcome! I was genuinely scared by some of the death threats I received for the last cliffhanger!

I still have an epilogue, and a surprise thingie left to upload, so watch out for those! It'll be fun. I promise!

Cover credits in description go to the lovely silent_ninja_tfios! Thank you so friggin much! I adore it!!! you're one of my absolute favorite readers. (Still trying to figure out how to dedicate this!)

I'll hold off the big thank yous for my epilogue. ;)

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