Hot lead dripped into my stomach,

taught me to understand Ophelia

with her songs and her flowers,

made me feel what she had:

rose scented sadness carving caves into my heart.

The sun should have reclaimed its light, hand over hand

like a length of rope

leaving my world to darkness

and to grief.

Sickness rubbed up my lungs till I choked.

I needed to climb backward

into yesterday,

back to when 'once upon a time'

was tattooed on the inside of my skull

in glowing certainty,

back to when I could breath free

of this thickening air.

I hoped the world would stop,

cease to turn and swallow

itself back into the space between stars.

But the earth kept spinning

just as Newton said it would;

a planet around the sun,

an apple to the ground,

and I to a memory.