(I actually really hated how I left it off so I fixed the last paragraph just in case your wondering why it says publish changes. The next chapter would not make much sense if I did not make these changes.)

Peggy's POV:

I woke up feeling the butterflies from that night were still there, It was like a dream and I felt that spark which I had never thought to experience. But that day has passed and quickly my normal mood began to settle in as the name Monday called my name. I threw on a light pink crop top and my black leggings. I thought I actually looked pretty cute, that opinion quickly changed when I asked Eliza. Her response told me I was pretty decent, it made me feel so uncomfortable at that money so I just changed into my black hoodie. She always looked so pretty, this probably wasn't much to her. Today I trudged behind my sisters on this windy day, listening to the leaves crunch on the ground. The leaves had just started to fall, leaves are a metaphoric way to describe my life. One day it's just gonna fall and you can hope for it to regrow. Eliza wanted to get her walk-in today and I only had my driver's permit it's not up to me to drive. I don't talk to Angelica, making for a tense environment. Our neighborhood was nice, the people were friendly in a way. A lot of them had pretty gardens I always admired the sunflowers or the yellow sunflowers. It was unfortunate knowing that I wouldn't see them again until spring.

 Many people acknowledge my sister's kids would shout hi or people would offer small gifts. A token of their beauty and refinement. That's something make-up, extensions, or any other of the sort would ever do for me. Yet I used them anyways hoping to remove the impurities of my demeanor.  I stayed quiet when they approached hoping not to get, "oh sorry I didn't see you there sweetie.", I don't mind I didn't need them. I keep my friend group small. One of the reasons being that nobody knew I was there or if they did, they only saw me in a narrow image of this misconception that I was the background character of my sister's story, a shadow of their existence. Now I'm happy to say I have two friends who I could keep close the one that is more than a friend and the one who discovered me when I was low. Maria Lewis and John Laurens, and I didn't know why they stood by, because both had the upper hand but I was happy to know I was at least noticed once. 

When we arrived at school I met up with Maria, "we have practice today in case you forgot." She reminded me gently. "Thanks." Little did she know that I'd never forgotten the little things that I looked forward to, aspirations, that word had hope. OOF I felt a sudden slam into someone and I begin to panic remembering the last encounter I had when I bumped into someone. 

"S-sorry please don't hurt me," I say timidly. Maria's hand rested on my shoulder giving me the courage to look up. It was Mrs.Miller. "Your late." Shoot not again. "I advise you to start paying attention when your walking young lady," I could smell the coffee on her breath, she was a little too close for my liking. "What class are you in?" She taps her foot waiting for an answer as if I had not been in her class for a year straight. Maria tries to cover me but it's fine the teacher had eyes check the attendance list or something. It's pretty exhausting explaining this over again.

We parted ways, we did not have this class together but we walk together everywhere now, we're close and that scared me to have someone new come in. It scared me so much because the day she leaves someone else will leave too. Does everybody leave? I sat in the back of the room. I listened to one of my favorite songs from V.Rose "pretty sad" it's actually not a bad great collab with Wande. I listened to all my music on shuffle it's like a surprise you don't know what your gonna get nothing is planned. So as I listened to them singing about materialism and how it won't fill your empty heart I dwelled on my thoughts. It's true though, isn't it? I know but how do I get out to do I say a prayer to make it all go away?  My heart is so sorrowful when will I convince myself. When that day comes I'll be ok. Maybe for one day, just one day, one night. Give me the taste of freedom. If I know what freedom is, but I don't, why do I trap myself in these thoughts these monologues no I don't need any dialogue what I do need is a way to escape.

The bell rang snapping me back to reality. I hated when I did that, I can just be minding my own business and miss the whole world drowning myself in these thoughts that don't go away. "Just be grateful! You have a great life." 

Lunch comes around I sat with Maria at one table, Angelica and Eliza sat with Theodosia, and of course, there are the boys. Everybody had their place and I had mine. "Hey, are you ok?" Maria ask. I smile at her, "I'm just in those moods." We sit in silence for a little. "You wanna talk about it?" I nod my head no. "I'm fine."

Later that day I stopped by John's locker he was talking to one of the girls on the debate team. I didn't say anything because she was beautiful and I was not simple. I didn't care if we were dating it was unofficial and I wouldn't blame him if he left me for her anyways. I knew deep inside that I was just insecure, I knew but acted like I didn't care. If I ignore the problem it will go away. If I ignore the problems I wouldn't feel so... yeah. 

I can't escape this prison. I really regret signing up for volleyball. I thought I could do it but it's starting to suck. At least I might make my dad proud maybe I could be great. I could be good at something.  Maria won't be there she had to leave early, for some reason. She wouldn't tell me why, I hope she's ok. Now I would be alone the majority of the time, great. Hey, now I can sit on the bleachers hoping somebody would notice I was there. Then I could really get in the game but they didn't, of course, I'm noticeable and short. I let everybody leave the gym and I stayed behind hoping I'd be able to get past the crow of kids who also took after school activities. My body started to shiver at the thought then my breathing speed up drastically. No, no not again. I clenched my chest trying not to fall to the ground.