9

Soran

Emma isn't in school. Again. I need to know where she is so I can make sure she isn't leaving me. She doesn't understand how much I need her. I have a burning desire to be with her and hold her, but she keeps pushing me away. The desire swells each time I look at her, and it gets to the point to where it's about to burst, and since I don't have her, I end up latching on to the closest female to me.

I know it's wrong, but I can't help it. Everything would be so much simpler if she would just accept me and stop trying to reject me every second she gets.

I stalked over to Gaven's table as calmly as I could manage. "Where's Emma?"

He barely spared me a glance. "The Alpha is talking to her. She won't be in today. Besides, I thought you were told to leave her alone?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. "How do you know about that?"

"I'm going to be Alpha soon," He finally looked at me. "I have to know everything."

I let out a low growl then stormed away from their table. I hate him. I hate him and his attitude towards me.

But most of all, I hate how his entire pack is against Emma and I being together. Why can't they see that her and I are meant to be together?! We're mates, for fuck's sake. No one is allowed to mess with the Mate Connection! They will regret it.

I just can't wait to see her again so I can explain everything to her and let her know my side of the story. Hopefully she'll be a little more willing to accept me.

Damn it, I hope she accepts me. I can't keep going on like this much longer.

"Hey, Soran," I turned to see a girl slowly sauntering over to me. "Are we still up for tonight?"

I smirked. "Yes, we are. I'll pick you up from the park nearby after school."

"I'm looking forward to it." She winked then left.

What was just said between us started to sink it. Damn it, I did it again!

I need to speak to Emma now before this gets too much farther out of hand.

-------------

Emma

"Emma," I looked up from my mug to Alpha Nyl. "I'm certain I have your full attention now?"

I slowly nodded and rested the empty coffee mug on his desk. "Yes, Alpha. You do."

"Good." He leaned back in his chair a bit. "This almost reminds me of how I helped your father understand what he was feeling for your mother..."

"In any case," He sat forward once more and folded his hands on his desk. "You've told me that Soran has been ignoring the Connection between you two. He's been off with several women and seems to have no interest in you."

"Sort of." I cut in, making him raise an eyebrow at me. "Well, yes, he is ignoring the Connection and going off with other women, but he's been trying to get me to go with him at the same time. What I see is that he wants us to be mates, yet at the same time, he still wants to go off with other women while the two of us are mates. This is what I'm afraid of, and I don't want to get hurt."

Nyl nodded slowly. "I see where you're coming from. I can't say I know what you're going through, but let me assure you that even though he may be off doing his own thing, from what I saw, he is trying to change his ways to be with you. Sure, it may have nearly cost my Beta, and third's son their lives, but I can see it."

I was shaking my head before he had even finished speaking. "Alpha, please. Try to see this from my perspective. I had my Wolf talk to him. You know what he said? He said that he would take me and only allow me to come back if he allowed it. He also said that until I agree to go back with him he will be loyal to me, but until then, he said he would 'try' to contain himself. He doesn't plan on staying loyal. I don't want to get hurt, Nyl!"

He sighed softly and ran a hand down the side of his face. "Emma-"

"He doesn't love me." My voice shook a bit. "He doesn't want me. He may act like it, but he doesn't. I can't... be with him. I can't- It hurts too much. It pains me to know that he doesn't want to be with me. My heart literally shatters when I see that he's gone off with another woman. It don't want it to, but it does. I don't want to go through heart break after heart break with him. I just... can't..."

"Do you love him?" The question caught me off guard. Do I love him? No, it's impossible for me to love someone like him. He's not someone I need in my life. He'll only hurt me. He doesn't want me. He only wants to satisfy his urges. I'll only be one of his flings.

"Maybe... I don't know..." Why the hell did I say that?! "I mean, I shouldn't love him because of what he does, but I feel jealous when he's with other girls. I feel anger when he talks about them. I feel like my heart is breaking when I hear that he was with another girl. It just... I don't know. I'm so confused and conflicted."

"You want to be with him, yet you don't."

"Exactly..." I admitted softly.

"There is a way to test if he does want to be with you or not." Nyl began shuffling through some papers. "Next month, I will be giving Gaven the title of Alpha. I could maybe turn a blind eye and allow some others into the ceremony. Soran might come. If he sees you with other males around you, you can see if he reacts or not. If he does, you will understand that he does want to be with you and is trying to change. If not, I will kick him off my land and talk to his father about keeping him away from you."

"Deal." We shook on it. I just hope this actually works.

~~~~

"So, what did my father talk to you about?" Gaven asked the next day as we entered the school building.

I shrugged. "I can't exactly say. It's between the two of us. But how are you? Are you excited about next month?"

A huge grin spread across his cheeks. "Definitely! My dad makes me Alpha of the pack and all of you get your ranks as well! A whole new, fresh generation of ranks get to show the world how worthy they are! I can't wait!"

"Have you told Emily about this?" We sat at our table.

He slowly looked down at the table. "No, I haven't... She... actually doesn't know about me yet. Soran had let something slip, but I was able to blow it off and play it as nothing. She still doesn't know."

I shook my head. "You gotta tell her, Gav. This is important. She's going to be the Luna of this pack; she needs to know."

"Speaking of which," We focused on Linda. "Where is she?"

Gaven poked at his food. "She's staying home today. She fell down the stairs last night and the doctor wanted her to keep her ankle propped up. She sprained it pretty badly."

"Why aren't you with her?" Kester nudged him with his elbow.

"She forced me to go to school..." He pushed his tray away. "But once school gets out, I'm heading over there."

"Aw, how sickeningly sweet." I teased as I ruffled his hair. He whined in complaint and tried to fix his hair, to which I messed it up again.

"Emma, quit!" He tried to swat my hands away.

"Make me!" I very childishly stuck my tongue out at him. This went on for a few more seconds before Kester and Linda broke up our mini fight.

Only, it wasn't because we were getting too rough.

No.

Linda had managed to catch a glance at Soran across the cafeteria. He looked pissed and ready to murder someone. Not that I cared, but we're in the presence of humans. Suddenly shifting to stop him would not be good...

So we sat in silence the rest of the breakfast hour. Which sucked...

We were all thankful when breakfast ended and we could go our separate ways to class. I made my way to first hour, a light skip in my step. That's odd... I never skip. This is school! I should be slightly depressed because I'm not at home sleeping!

Why am I acting this way?

It might have to do with what I talked with Nyl about yesterday. I seriously hope this plan works... If it doesn't, I don't know what to do.

Class soon started. "Alright, everyone. We're doing projects." Ah, yes... Another reason I hate school... "We will be pairing up for this, so choose wisely."

"Emma!" I turned to face Linda to claim her as my partner, but my desk was suddenly moved, nearly throwing me off balance.

"You're my partner." Oh, joy...

"Good, everyone has a partner." Crap... Can't change now... "Choose a topic that is related to this class, or relates to it in some way. You need a five minute PowerPoint, plus at least three sources each. This is due in three weeks and then we begin presentations. I will be passing around a rubric so you all know how I want it done." God damn it... I don't wanna be with Soran...

So, to keep personal talk a minimum between us, I went all business. "Since we are partners, I will not be picking up your slack. You will do your work and get it turned in to me on time. There will be no slow-play and I will make it to where if you screw up, your grade will suffer, not mine."

"Understood."

"Good." I pulled out a pencil and paper. "Since this is history class, we shall make sure that what we do has something to do with history. First, what time era do we want to do?"

"Why not the Witch trials?" I raised an eyebrow at that. "Well, think about it. Not only were Witches burned, so were other beings."

I gave a half shrug. "I guess. But we can't really talk about our kind being in the trials. Kinda against the law..."

"And?" I glared at him. "It's not like we'll actually tell them who we are. God, you're such a goody two-shoes. Grow a pair and man up."

"Excuse me?!" I growled at him. "No, I'm done. Mr. Manning, I have to leave." I grabbed my things and stormed out of the classroom, ignoring anyone who tried to stop me. I seriously hope I can make it to the ceremony for Gaven before I kill Soran. If I have to go through this any more than I have to and stay with him for extended periods of time, I'll either murder him, or kill myself. He has no regard for me, or anyone else.

Before I knew it, I was back home. I hope no one sees me... I carefully and quietly snuck in to the house. I know about this time of day mom is usually at the pack house talking with Shelbie, but you never know. She could have decided to not go, which she has done a few times.

After checking the house, I gave a small sigh of relief when I found out I was alone. I set my stuff down and flopped onto my bed. My eye caught something. I reached out for it and grabbed the small picture frame. My heart grew heavy.

I still haven't spoken to Vicca since that day. Seeing this picture reminded me of that. It was my seventh birthday and dad had managed to capture Vicca and I smashing cake in each others faces. It got every where. I gave a soft smile as I remembered the fun times with her.

But then that all ended. Someone texted me.

Gaven: Soran is losing his shit. Where r u?

Me: Like i really care. Tell him to go back with one of his side chicks.

There was a pause before he answered again.

Gaven: Emma, seriously. Where are you?

Me: Dont tell him, but im at home. I had to get away from him before shit hit the fan.

"Emma Shay, what the hell are you doing home?!" Shit... There was a short, hard knock on my door before it flew open to reveal a very pissed off dad.

"Hi, dad..." I smiled sheepishly.

"Well?" He crossed his arms.

I sighed. "If I didn't leave, I would have killed Soran and/or anyone would might have been around me."

His eyes narrowed. "I thought he was told to leave you alone?"

"We have a couple classes together." I explained as I sat up. "We have a project to work on in our first hour class and he claimed me as his partner."

"And?" He prompted.

I rolled my eyes. "And words were said and I left. Simple as that."

He sighed and sat on my bed. "Emma, you gotta stop running from your problems. Yes, they may seem tough at the time, but you need to face them head-on. You gotta take the Rogue by the throat and claim dominance as you take him down."

I gave a light chuckle. "Yeah, great analogy. He's an Alpha, so I can't exactly do that. I just have to handle this to the best of my ability and hope for the best. Thanks for the talk, dad."

He grinned. "Anytime. Now, about your punishment for leaving school..."

Damn it...