It was a dark night, darker than any before, sombre and quiet like a graveyard, the Malfoy Manor being packed with Death Eaters awaiting their master to arrive for the meeting.
The long table had many chairs for the most important members, yet two of them were empty - The Lord's and his Right Hand's - That would be me.

How did I get here? Why did I end up walking around in a long Black dress like Morticia's, my arm hooked to the Dark Lord's, Lady Vashj and Nagini slithering next to us, as we made our way to the grant living room, waiting to pass judgement to our victim - Charity Burbage, Hogwarts' Muggle Studies professor.
Or that is what she was before getting kidnapped and suspended upside down above our meeting table, pleading for her life to Severus and Draco.

Voldy: A lovely night, isn't it?
Me: The perfect night to pass judgement.
Voldy: Indeed, my dear, and not only. Today we will discuss the fate of this lady. Severus, I am sure you remember your own colleague, correct?
Severus: Yes.
Voldy: For everyone who doesn't know, this woman is a former Professor of Hogwarts. Do you know what her subject was? Muggle Studies!

A boom of loud laughter echoed around the room from the brainwashed death eaters, much like my own curly haired aunt.

Bella: Ha! Muggle studies! Spare me, as if anyone could even THINK those stupid muggles could be any interesting or better than us! What a joke!
Voldy: You are right, Bellatrix, and today we will show her what we do to the muggle lovers, those filthy nobodies who dare taint out pure lineage!
Bella: Allow me, my Lord! Please, allow me to show my devotion to you and our cause!
Voldy: Your enthusiasm is appreciated, but today is the time for our dear Raven to shine and be an example for all of you. Such a young soul, yet so ambitious, intelligent and ready to do anything for her goals. Such spirit is rarely seen in people nowadays...And unfortunately, it lacks in most of you as well. So let today be an example of much needed ruthlessness, mixed with mercy.

Saying that, he carresed my face, then told me in parseltongue what shall be done, but I already knew what was to be done.
I called out Lady Vashj and she hissed at me lovingly as she climbed up my leg then latched onto my extended arm as I pointed the next victim.
She went to slither on the table and as she approached the professor, she raised a bit and stopped, waiting for the signal, which I provided.

"DEATH"

And with that, she opened her mouth, showing off her deadly fangs and started biting off from the victim, allowing no time for pleadings, only screams of agony and splurs of blooding splattering left and right.
I could only look at the scene unfolding, my heart in pain, but not for the person I just executed, but for the fact that I ended up looking at something so gruesome and monstruous without flinching, feeling disgusted or afraid.

I was slowly realising what a monster I had become over the past weeks...Months...Years...
From the innocent girl who I was back in Year 2, who would've thought I would become a criminal.

A murderer.

And for what...?

"For the greater good" he said.

But is that really the truth of it all?
Is this agony ever going to end?
Is my sacrifice going to mean anything?

I glanced right to see Severus' eyes, blank, devoid of any expression, until he looked me in the eyes, and a hidden resentment and worry only I could see glinted, which made me avert my gaze to the opposite direction, to the owners of the Manor.
Lucius looked afraid, trembling internally out of worry.
Narcissa was barely even blinking, trying to somehow hold the hands of her husband's and son, to somehow calm them down and toughen then up.

And Draco...

My poor Draco...

He was blinking so rapidly, trying to wipe away the tears, not even able to look anywhere but down, fear so evident on his face.

I had to take him out of there somehow...
Get him out of there, save him, hold him tight and reassure him, telling him not to worry, that everything is going to be okay.
The only thing I wanted to do was to run to him and get away from this place, to a safe haven where there could be only us and no evil.

But I couldn't...

Voldy: Very good, very good, Raven! You have proved your worth, dedication and spirit for our cause and I believe by now everyone in this room was deeply moved by all the sacrifices you have made thus far in these past years. There should no doubt of your loyalty to me...I have deep faith in all of you, my loyal followers and yet, between each other exists such an abyssal grudge and hate...Such envy, just as our dear Bellatrix. in her limitless passion, has been nurturing intense jealousy over Severus' dearest student, one of the people I trust the most in this room...So I ask of you to bring me answers.
Sev: My Lord, if I may speak, it has been known since the very beginning that Lestrange has shown nothing but hatred towards me, so I believe it only natural that she should show the same mistrusy towards miss Black here, her own relative. Perhaps she feels...Replaced?
Me: I'm sorry for being far more beautiful and talented than you, auntie, but I was born perfect and I came here to serve the Lord, driven by the same desire to prove myself and walk over the bastards who thought me inferior to them.
Bella: Silence! That is clearly not true! Those two are simply not to be trusted! They are the same - sneaky, slimy, sly...Liars who wish success and benefit from leeching my Lord!
Me: Sounds like what a jealous person would say. Excuses!
Voldy: It seems like Severus and Raven have quite a strong bond of trust -Unbreakable, if I dare say...But I wonder, young one, if you are aware of the lie Severus has been feeding you since the very beginning.
Me: Lie...? My Lord, whatever are you saying? I...I don't understand.
Voldy: Oh, sweet Summer child. You, who has suffered your whole childhood in a filthy muggle orphanage, all alone, devoid of anyone caring for you, no parent or sibling...You, an innocent and adorable child, shy and reserved by nature, yet your with and ambition obvious, you clinged on the first person who showed you any sort of sympathy, the first person who so happened to be Severus Snape, your House's headteacher, the one who fought for you, against any injustice you suffered, and Merlin knows they weren't few.
Me: Well, yes, but that has never been a secret, so why is my life story being brought up now?
Voldy: You and I are not very different, young one. My father too was alive, but away, not even wanting to know I existed, and yet, there is something different...
Sev: My Lord, please, she shouldn't know.
Me: Sirius Black is a stranger to me and I care naught of what happens to him anymore. And my mother is dead, hence why I have this neat skull mark on my neck, just like Potter.
Voldy: *chuckles* That is where the truth ends and lies start to build up your reality - The reality that the wretched Dumbledore created and Severus made sure it happened...Yami Black, your mother, is alive and well, resting.
Me: ...I...What? Come again, I think I misheard or something...
Voldy: There is no use trying to run away from the truth or deny it...But Severus, why don't you explain everything to your dear pupil? You are one of the onlypeople who know the secret, after all...Right, Lucius? Narcissa?
Lucius: We don't know anything about Yami Black, my Lord.
Narcissa: My Lord, is it true that Raven's mother is alive? She's been like a daughter to me all these years, but if Yami is alive, I believe she has the right to meet her for the first time.
Lucius: Narcissa, don't interfere! It's the Lord's decision!
Voldy: Why, Lucius, but Narcissa is entirely right. My gift for Raven, for doing such an impeccable job killing Dumbledore, is to erase the lies and bring her to her mother.
Me: Why...? Why....did nobody tell me...Why...? Sev...You knew...? Is that true, Sev...?
Sev: Raven, I....
Voldy: Go ahead, Severus, she deserves to know.
Me: Sevy...Please...I want to know...

By now, my whole was trembling lightly, one hand over my chest, clutching my heart, while the other was on the side of my neck, unconsciously scratching at my scar.
My eyes, switching shades between the grey, green and blue from the shock, were nervously glancing up and down, from the ground, to Severus and occasionally to Voldemort, confused and hurt, betrayed, all whilst my hair, instead of having its usual ebony black colour, it began to lighten, a dark blue shade taking over, slowly turning to a lighter shade, no longer being able to control my emotions, sorrow evident in my body movements.

Sev: Yami never died. Apart from our Lord and myself, only Bellatrix and Dumbledore knew the truth.
Me: Why them?? Why did she have to hide?
Sev: She wasn't exactly hidden...But it was a mercy for everyone to think she was dead, rather than...
Bella: Crazy! Insane! I knew because I Crucio'ed her into insanity! Oh, dear Sevy was SO angry, he'd have done the same to me, but the Dark Lord saved me~!
Sev: *nods* She is well now, resting in Saint Mungo's.
Me: ...Huh?
Sev: Dumbledore wanted it to be a secret from you as well, for your own good. "To keep you safe" as he said.
Me: Severus....Are you...*screams* ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID, SEVERUS SNAPE?! YOU STUPID MAN, HOW DARE YOU KEEP SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT FROM ME?! HOW DARE YOU LET THAT OLD GEEZER TELL YOU WHAT TO DO, AND MORE, LIE TO ME LIKE THAT, SO SHAMELESSLY?!
Sev: It had to be -
Me: FUCK THAT! Screw you and SCREW DUMBLEDORE! All you two did was to fuck my life over again and again and....AND FOR WHAT?! Only to life a lie?!
Sev: I am sorry, but-
Me: You know what a smart man once said? Everything before "but" is horseshit and he was right! But there's more! What about the scar?! My memories?! The prophecy?!
Sev: All made by him. He implanted fake memories in your head, made that scar and invented a prophecy so you'd help him.
Me: I have no words left for you. You helped him. You stupid, brainless puppet...You complete retard! Never talk to me again, do you hear me?! I wish to see you dead soon! You deserve NOTHING!
Sev: Don't say that-
Me: You have NO right to speak! You're worse than Bellatrix!
Voldy: Now, now, dear, do you wish to finally be reunited with your mother?

Barely able to choke down a sob,I bite my lip real hard, enough to almost draw blood, and looking down, I grasp Voldemort's hand in both my own, wiping away a tear and speaking in a weirdly gentle voice, barely audible.

"Your wish shall be granted" he chuckled as he apparated us in a St. Mungo's patient chamber and staying all alone, I see a brunette woman in a white nightgown, staring blankly at the wall in front of her, humming a soft tone - One that weirdly enough, I recognised and started humming along, approaching her bed slowly.

Me: Mum...?

I barely said above a whisper, but she paid me no mind or flinch.

Me: Why isn't she doing anything?
Voldy: Are you aware of the fate of the Longbottoms?
Me: No way...! You mean to say that...
Voldy: Quite so.
Me: But...But why...? Why would Bellatrix do something like this for no reason?!
Voldy: She always hated your father, and this was a way for revenge.
Me: Ah....Hahaha...No way...
Voldy: It is the truth, unfortunately.

Slowly, I go to sit down next to her, making her look at me, tilting her head tot he side, like a confused puppy, and yet, holding the same serene smile and look on her face.

Mum: Hello.
Me: Hello. How are you feeling?
Mum: I'm okay...Are you a nurse? Never seen you before.
Me: I'm a visitor. I wish to become a Healer, though.
Mum: *nods* Lovely and noble career. If I had a daughter, I'd be so proud to know she made it so far.
Me: Ah...Haha...W-Well, that's very sweet of you.
Mum: Who are you?
Me: My name is Raven. I'm a witch at Hogwarts, just like were a few years ago.
Mum: Hm...? Witch? Hogwarts? What are those?
Me: Wh-What do you mean? You don't remember?
Mum: *chuckles* Silly, there is no such thing as magic!
Me: Ah...M-My Lord...?
Mum: Is that your father? It's really nice to see new people around.
Voldy: As you can see, she exhibits extreme memory loss and as the charts say, there is no way of recovery. She will remain handicapped and unaware her whole life. She is not your mother anymore, Raven. She hasn't been since that incident.
Mum: Ah...Hello! New visitors, who are you?
Me: Uh...Huh? I just introduced myself.
Mum: Are you sure? I don't remember.
Me: Oh my God...
Voldy: Is this what you wanted, Raven? To watch your mother suffer eternally?
Me: No...I...
Mum: Are you the new nurse?
Me: No...I'm a visitor...
Mum: Oh...Okay...I wish my daughter would become a Healer...If I ever have one.
Me: L-Lovely...
Voldy: Don't you want to end her suffering? She's hurting so much...And will never be normal again...
Me: I can't...I...I couldn't....Possibly...K-Kill...Her...
Voldy: It would only be mercy. And if it's from you, it will show how much you love her. Enough to sacrifice yourself to do it, instead of letting others do it.
Me: Ah....No...No way....
Mum: Have I seen you before?
Me: Ahhhh!!!! No...Goodness....No....Why....?! WHy me?! WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME?!
Mum: Are you okay, dear?
Me: No, I'm not!
Mum: I see...Hello.
Me: Hello...?
Mum: Are you the new nurse?
Me: GODAMN IT!
Voldy: You know how to put a stop to this madness...
Me: Yes...That's right...I know...I can do it...
Mum: Do I know you?
Me: Yes...You do...
Mum: Oh really? I don't remember.
Me: I'm your Healer. And I'm here to entertain you for the day.
Mum: Hm...?What does that mean?
Me: May I know your favourite colour?
Mum: My favourite colour...What could it be...
Me: Do you remember?
Mum: Yes...Green. I've always loved green...
Me: Ah...How...How lovely...
Mum: What do you want to do?
Me: Let me make you laugh for a bit.
Mum: Okay...

Getting up I sigh, closing my eyes, then perform a Patronus charm, making my wolf jump around playfully, nudging my mother's hand and cheek, before completely vanishing, making her laugh and clap in glee.

Mum: Oh, that was wonderful! Can you do more?
Me: Yes...I can.

I started doing more random spells to entertain her, until she said she was pretty tired, which was barely 10 minutes later.
She smiled softly, laying down on her bed.

Me: Hey...I remembered I know a green spell. Do you want to see it? It's very pretty.
Mum: Yes, show me!
Me: Very well...*whispers* I love you, mum...

Just as I did the Killing curse, I heard a faint "Thank you, Raven" making me fall to my knees, slapping my hands over my mouth, my scream muffled by them, tears falling down endlessly.

She was moving no more.

Voldy: You did well, Raven. You gave her a blessing. She's no longer suffering or in pain now. She thanked you.
Me: Yes...You're right...But it hurts...So much...
Voldy: Let us return to the Mansion, you deserve to rest now.
Me: *nods* O-Okay...

He apparated us back to the Mansion, where he kept praising my deed, before dismissing everyone...But I couldn't hear...
I could see nothing...Feel nothing...

I already killed two people...One of my teachers...And my own mother.
I...
I did her a mercy...
Right...?

I didn't even realise there were only 4 other people in the room, or that I slumped to my knees, looking blankly ahead, until I felt a firm hand on my shoulder, which made me jolt up and slap the person as hard as I could, shrieking at him.

It was Severus.

Me: You...! You did this! You made me into what I am! A MURDERER! I became what I dreaded the most and it's ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT! Never touch me again! Never come anywhere close to me! Never talk to me! STAY AWAY FROM ME! F O R E V E R !
Sev: Raven, calm down-
Me: Do NOT tell me what to do! Disappear! Go away! I swear, if I see you again...I...I don't know what I'll do! Take it as a warning...!
Sev: I-
Me: GO AWAY, DAMN IT!!!

He only nodded and left the room, letting me look up at the ceiling, tears not stopping to fall down endlessly.

Draco: Raven...
Me: ...
Draco: Let's go to our room.
Me: Everyone around me is dying...And I'm the cause of it.
Draco: No, you're not! It's his fault. His and Snape's and Dumbledore's! We can trust no one but ourselves. Just us...Family.
Me: However...I am not your family. I am merely your classmate.
Draco: What...? How can you even say something like that?
Me: Your father got in Azkaban because of me. You got stuck in this mess because of me...I shouldn't stay around you any longer...I'm only bringing misfortune to everyone. I should leave...
Draco: Will you shut up already?!
Me: Huh...?
Draco: Stop saying all these stupid words! You are part of our family and that's how it's been since Year 1! You never brought us misfortune, but on the contrary, you saved the day over and over and...And stop belittling yourself, it's pissing me off!
Me: Draco...?
Draco: I won't have you speaking ill of yourself anymore, get it? It's always been us against the world...Against everyone. I can't lose you. So...I won't let you lose yourself, get it?
Me: Draco...What are you trying to say...?
Draco: You've saved me all these years, but now, let me be the one to save you.
Me: I couldn't possibly let you carry this burden. You can't carry my cross, it will crush you.
Draco: I'm done hearing that you have to sacrifice yourself to save us! Just for once, let me help you. Weren't you the one always claiming that I'm not alone? Well then, neither are you.
Me: I...I...Well...

Not letting me saying anything further, he put both his hands on my face, raising it up so I could look him in the eyes, mine leaking with many tears, pink and puffy and in pain, while his full of sorrow and love.

He kissed my head before he put his forehead to mine, whispering the 3 words I never imagined I would ever hear, especially not from him.

"I love you."

Hearing those words, I started outright sobbing, throwing myself in his arms, clutching desperately at the back of his shirt, not wanting to ever let go.

My heart hurt so much that I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe anymore.

I just wanted to stay like this, in his embrace, never to let go again.

I just wanted to take him away and disappear from this world, from this cruel madness that engulfed us and didn't want to let us go from its shackles, burning us eternally.

"I love you so much, Draco...Never let me go...Please..."

"I never will."