1998

I was absolutely furious at my dad.

Let down, betrayed . . . I honestly couldn't believe he'd fucked my mum over like this. And now he'd bought a fucking hotel in the Highlands and pissed off to run it with his mistress. Classy.

I hated cheaters. Always had. I'd only encountered fictional ones in the past though; from shows like "Eastenders" or "Emmerdale" (my mum was a big soap opera fan). My dad was actually the first real-life cheater I'd had the misfortune to come across.

Anyway, we were moving house as a result of the separation. Downsizing to a three bedroom semi- detached a couple of miles away from the oversized fucking mausoleum we'd lived in while he was around and trying to pretend that he wasn't a massive tool. The move itself didn't bother me too much - I didn't have to change school, and I'd never been a particular fan of the old house anyway - it was just the circumstance that had caused the move that was annoying me.

As my mum finished directing the removal guys outside, I surveyed my new bedroom, surrounded by boxes, and wondered where to even start with my unpacking. I was not looking forward to this.

I'd located the box containing my PlayStation (priorities) and started tearing it open, but I found myself distracted by the sound of voices outside. Female voices. Curiously, I walked over to the window.

What the fuck!? Iona Stewart was standing next to my mum.

She lived here? Surely that couldn't be the case? I couldn't be that lucky. Much like the first time I ever spotted her, my heart started pounding hard.

I needed to investigate further, in case I was just hallucinating. I mean, it had never been an issue before but there's a first time for everything. I rushed down the stairs, pausing before I reached the door to calm my breathing down before I stepped outside. I could hear the other woman, presumably Iona's mum, inviting us to a barbecue that night. Oh my god.

"I have another son who's around your age, Iona."

I guess that was my cue.

"Here he is now, actually."

Iona's gaze travelled up my body and finally met my eyes. Shite, I thought as I belatedly remembered I'd not bothered putting my contacts in that morning. Damn it.

"Ryan?" Iona asked in surprise. Her lips twitched upwards.

"You know each other?" My mum asked, clearly delighted. She loved "it's a small world" moments like this.

I nervously nudged my glasses up my nose and walked towards them. 'We're old friends," I managed. I suddenly couldn't stop grinning. It had pretty much always been my default mode around Iona.

Of all the people who could be living across the road from me, fate had chosen Iona Stewart. Consider my mind completely blown!

Somehow I ended up left alone with Iona, and I could barely remember our ensuing conversation. I just know I did not remotely play it cool, while she seemed completely unaffected. I didn't have any other plans that evening anyway but, trust me, if I had, I'd have cancelled them in a heartbeat to potentially spend time with her at that barbecue.

"I'd better head back," she said after putting up with my special brand of awkwardness for a few minutes, nodding in the direction of her house. "But I'll see you later?"

"Count on it," I said, resolving to try and not be such an idiot next time I spoke to her.

I've got to admit I didn't really do that much to prepare for later. I stuck my contacts in, chucked a green and white checked shirt on over what I was already wearing, and ran some product through my hair but apart from that I mainly just fretted.

I unpacked a couple of boxes while listening to my "(What's The Story) Morning Glory?" album, and tried to build up a list of discussion topics in my head. Conversation had always flowed pretty easily between Iona and myself, but it had been a while and I didn't want it to be uncomfortable.

School. Gossip. "Friends". Oh yeah, we'd spoke a lot about the sitcom in class; I could get a good amount of mileage out of that. I'll ask her opinion on "We were on a break"!

By the time we were ready to head across to the Stewarts', I was feeling a lot calmer. I could do this. It was going to be fun. I was going to have a delicious burger, and I was going to speak to a pretty girl without acting like an idiot.

Somehow, I thought to myself, I'm going to make Iona Stewart love me.

Then I laughed at what a fucking sap I was.

I introduced myself to Iona's dad as he plonked a juicy beefburger onto my paper plate. "So you go to school with Iona?" He asked me, looking around the garden. "I don't know where she's bloody gone; she disappeared upstairs hours ago and hasn't been seen since." He shook his head and I laughed, settling myself down on a patch of grass. As I did so I was suddenly very aware of Iona entering the garden through the patio doors but I busied myself with assembling my burger and pretended I hadn't noticed.

A shadow fell over me a minute or two later. "Can I join you?" Her voice was soft.

"Of course!" I'm pretty sure there were love hearts in my eyes as I looked up at her, that's how pathetic I was. She'd straightened her hair since earlier - it was lighter in colour than it used to be back when we were in class together, and lighter than my own now - and changed her top and she looked gorgeous. "You look nice." I found myself blurting out. Iona Stewart had broken my internal filter a long time ago.

"Thanks, you do too." She flushed as soon as she said it and I could tell she was embarrassed, so I just smiled.

"I was hoping you'd sit with me. We must have so much to catch up on."

And, suddenly, it was like we were back in that computing class in third year. Except without the stoned teacher and the actual - yuck -  schoolwork that often got in the way of our conversation. The chat drifted along with ease, we laughed and joked and . . . possibly even flirted a bit? Maybe not, I wasn't exactly experienced at that kind of shit.

When I noticed her shivering, I couldn't resist giving her my shirt. Anything to get myself closer to her. She looked so good in it. And I couldn't help but notice, as I edged nearer, that she smelled deliciously sweet.

God, I was absolutely smitten with her. My brain was short-circuiting and as we continued chatting I ended up complimenting her eyes without thinking it through first.

"You've got really pretty eyes. I've always thought so."

And, for the briefest of moments, the air seemed to change between us. She stared at me, golden brown eyes wide, and I couldn't look away. I didn't want to.

In that teensiest slip in time, I almost thought that I might not be in this thing alone. "Thanks," she said finally, her voice unbelievably soft.

We were both just staring at each other and it should have felt awkward but somehow . . . It wasn't.

Maybe she did like me too?

Then I spotted my mum walking past; her smile had momentarily slipped and I could see the pain it had been masking. It slightly dulled whatever just happened between me and Iona and, when Iona asked me if I was okay, it all came spilling out. I told her everything, and was rewarded by her lightly stroking my arm.

I hadn't realised how much I'd needed to talk to someone about the mess that was my family situation. But I was glad it was her I'd chosen to share it with.

Everyone started to make a move to leave at that point. I guessed I couldn't just hang around if everyone else was leaving, but I desperately wanted to spend more time with Iona. Now she was back in my life I didn't want to lose her again. Still, at least I knew she was right across the road.

I thanked her for listening and impulsively hugged her. I immediately regretted it, thanks to my body's natural reaction to her soft skin and vanilla scent, and pulled back quickly, hoping she hadn't noticed."I'm so glad we've reconnected. I really missed our friendship," I said in a rush, barely thinking about what I was saying, before I turned and rushed away.

Hopefully no one else noticed my erection either.

Later that night, after I'd "relieved my tension" and could get back to purer thoughts again, I realised Iona still had my shirt. Maybe she'll bring it over, I thought optimistically, before I drifted off to sleep.

So, when the doorbell rang the following afternoon, and my mum called to me that I had a visitor, I was pretty hopeful. "It better not be bloody Danny," I muttered to myself as I heard footsteps on the stairs.

But, no, it was Iona in the doorway, dark blonde hair back to disorganised curly chaos, waving my shirt around with a shy smile on her pretty face.

And all the brain cells I owned dropped clear out of my head again.

I sniffed the shirt and told her it smelled like her. I blushed furiously immediately afterwards. And then I somehow accidentally started talking about my underwear.

In short, I was a fucking trainwreck. Having Iona so close to me, in my bedroom, was somehow a nightmare and my dream-come-true at the same time.

Regardless, I didn't want her to leave anytime soon. So I grasped onto something I was actually good at and invited her to play video games.

I don't know if she'd say differently but for me that was the day our friendship truly began. After that we hung out more and more often, and I hoped that perhaps, just perhaps, she was starting to see me differently. That maybe she was developing feelings for me too.

Of course, technically I didn't even know if she was single as we never spoke about our love lives. But then, considering the amount of time we spent together as it was, I didn't think she'd have time for a boyfriend. I certainly didn't have time for a girlfriend - although, let's face it, the only girl I wanted was her. My crush had been locked-in since day 1 and it hadn't ever really faltered or wavered in another direction. I was loyal that way, essentially a human-sized puppy.

I hadn't actually kissed anyone yet and, hopeless romantic that I apparently was, I was pretty much holding out for Iona to be my first kiss. I'd been at a few nights out where I'd had the opportunity to kiss other girls and always avoided the situation when it occurred. To the point where I think a few girls had started speculating that I wasn't actually interested in girls at all . . . Let them think what they want though, I knew the truth.

But David Richardson's party was coming up, and I was hoping that Iona might come to that. Maybe I'd work up the nerve to tell her how I felt then. And maybe . . . I'd finally get that kiss.

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