C A L E B

Punch. Punch. Punch.

The most satisfying sound I hear all day. Every day. Every day.

Punch. Punch.

I could feel the adrenaline rushing through my body. Its extreme, intense feeling gives me the power and strength to keep pushing.

Punch.

The adrenaline in this moment is unlike anything in film or theatre. It's why it is so addictive. It is wonderful. It covers pain. It covers everything.

Adrenaline sharpens my brain; it sharpens my responses. The actions that take place make me feel alive again. It's scary, but it's part of it. Having that extra boost of adrenaline requires stamina; it requires being in shape mentally and emotionally.

It's a marathon.

But some days, I wish it would all miraculously stop.

My ear bud was suddenly pulled from my ear, whilst someone was yelling my name. It didn't stop me. I kept punching the bag and feeling the sweat roll down my back.

A hand rests on my shoulder.

"Caleb. It's late, kid. You have school tomorrow." Chuck held the punching bag to get my attention. "Son, you're pushing yourself too hard."

"That's what I'm aiming for." I breathed out through ragged breaths, each punch coming out harder with more precision and speed.

"Caleb, that's enough!" Chuck yelled in my face, his tone of authority stopping me in place.

I inhaled slowly and took a step back, my head automatically tilting upwards as I squint my eyes shut. The pain was spreading thoroughly throughout my chest, but its intensity was bearable.

My chest rises and falls rapidly as I tried to regain my breath again, each intake of breath painfully squeezing my muscles together as they contract viciously.

A bottle of water was thrusted towards my chest as I unconsciously grab it, forcing myself to scoff it down. I received a hard slap from Chuck whilst he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

"Don't drink too fast, son. You'll throw up with the amount you're drinking." He throws a towel towards my face as I grab it and wipe the sweat off my face and chest.

"Thanks." I murmured lowly.

He scoffs again. "Stupid boy. What are you doing to yourself?" He grabs my bruised knuckles and inspects them carefully. "Damn, what the hell did you do?"

"Some stupid junior. The little fucker went all up in my face."

Chuck tusks as she shook his head, disapproval written across his face. "Your pain tolerance is insane. You gotta stop this shit. No one's there to bail you out anymore."

"I don't need anyone or their money." I quickly snatch my bag and throw in my things, shoving past Chuck as I exit the gym.

"That's ridiculous. The fact is, you do." Chuck argued. "You can't just go around punching people and expect there to be no consequences."

I stop in my place, not once turning around but keeping my back towards his direction. Slinging my bag, I give him another glare over my shoulder. "Worry about your life, alright? You don't need to worry about mine. No one does."

I had already pushed through the doors and made my way out before I heard his response.

The chilly wind blew across my face as I quickly walked across the pathway to my apartment. I regretted not bringing a jumper with me. Even though it was a warm day, it still ended in a cold night.

The world around me seemed to disappear as I solemnly focused on how alone I actually was.

I've always been like this. It was apart of my life and how I functioned. But I learnt to live with it.

I was alone. I knew that all my life. But sometimes, I wished there was someone there for me, walking by my side. But I knew that would never happen.

~*~