(EDITED)

(Note to readers: Some parts ahead may not be in line with the new edits.)

[WARNING: READER DISCRETION ADVISED:

This chapter contains sexual content that some readers may find uncomfortable. If so, please refrain from reading further. Thank you.]

June in Los Angeles was a killer and a crook, a thief of summer and spring and a murderer of winter. You can quote me on it.

"Christ alive," I muttered one morning, yawning to high heaven as the smell of something savory wafted through the air. "What're you doing now?"

Kane had just pushed a bowl at me. "Kongnamul guk," he said.

I took a spoonful of it. "You sure Diego's the cook?"

His smile was translucent. "Is it good?"

"Better than anything I can make."

He just hummed. Corvus trickled in one by one, and he laid out the bowls, his smile lingering in my head.

Another morning had sentenced me away from my room long enough to return to a box on my bed. I'd frowned, checked for any suspicious tricks or tags on its surroundings, before popping it open.

A pair of cream-colored slippers stared up at me, with Kitty White waving up at me. I'd stared at them for a long, long moment.

At practice, I said, "Someone got me Hello Kitty slippers."

Kane hadn't looked up from his place on his bike, fiddling with the handlebar's adjustment. "Mm," he said.

"You know who?"

"No."

I told Zahir. Zahir had said, "Oh, in the white box? I saw Kane with that last night."

I had to lie down for a while afterwards.

At another point, I'd stumbled upon it outside my door.

I frowned down at the bag. I peered inside to find tangerines and granola bars. On a sticky note, it said: too many gummy bears.

I'd slept with the bag sitting idle on my nightstand, haunting me with a bright grin.

At a different day, Kane had found me hanging off the edge of a campus table near the science building, a Redbull as my lunch and my eyes seared off in the sun. He'd said, "Are you trying to die?"

I shrugged. "Is it working?"

Kane handed me half a veggie sandwich, set his bag down beside me, and sat down. "Not on my watch," he muttered. "It's too late in the season to find another sub."

My stomach churned, but the sandwich was damn good.

Corvus wasn't really helping my head either.

"You and King hang out a lot," Diego had said when we returned from a grocery run.

"Tracker," I explained.

"Sure," he replied.

Meredith smiled at my shirt, which had mysteriously appeared on my bed while I was in the shower. "Is that Uma Thurman?"

"One of the only good humans," I replied.

"Where'd you get it?"

"Dunno? It was on my bed."

Meredith had sat back in the kitchen chair. "Ah, I see," she murmured, and smiled.

It found me on the balcony more often than ever.

"Have you eaten?" Kane asked, shutting his glass door behind him.

I shrugged. "Tangerines and granola bars, mostly."

He paused, then hummed clumsily. He leaned on the railing beside me. "Are you hungry?"

"Nineteen year old young adult male, when am I not?" I snickered. "A cigarette sounds nice."

Kane turned on his heel. "Come on. I'll make bibimbap. Diego helped me make some banchan yesterday."

And variations of that.

I spat out the toothpaste and washed out my mouth. Kane pushed his fingers through his hair and turned on me. "Have you eaten?"

I paused. "No. Why?"

"Corvus wants Russell's. It's in Old Town. Let's go."

Not that I was any freer, trust me. "Okay. But don't buy—"

"I'll buy."

"Hey, wait!"

He spun on his heel, and headed out with a smile.

It somehow infiltrated my phone, too.

5:05 AM - kane

why are you awake?

5:10 AM - echo (echo)

how do you know i'm awake??

5:11 AM - kane

i knew your phone worked

And:

3:14 AM - kane

i need to go to the mall tomorrow, i promised zahir i'd pick up his watch
come with

3:19 AM - echo (echo)

go to sleep

3:15 AM - kane

come with

3:18 AM - echo (echo)

fine

And:

4:09 PM - echo (echo)

stop. buying. things.

4:33 PM - kane

?

4:39 AM - echo (echo)

[View Attachment]

4:42 PM - kane

i didn't buy that
ur soap has parabens anyway tho so might as well use that one

4:46 PM - echo (echo)

ur kidding me

And:

1:54 AM - echo (echo)

when do u even come in here
what r u doing in this room
where tf did u find a hello kitty bracelet and what kind of person do u think i am that i would wear a charm bracelet

1:59 AM - kane

i didn't buy that
u wore a gummy bear charm bracelet

2:03 AM - echo (echo)

stalker. ur a stalker

2:05 AM - kane

u don't like it

2:07 AM - echo (echo)

i'm not talking to u anymore

And:

12:01 PM - kane

[View Attachment]
u want anything for lunch?

12:09 PM - echo (echo)

it's all right

12:12 PM - kane

i'll get a veggie bowl

And:

5:44 PM - echo (echo)

is more than one moose, meese?

5:48 PM - kane

i'm not answering that bs

5:50 PM - echo (echo)

so u don't know
answer me grammatically

5:53 PM - kane

i'm doing smth
just call

5:54 PM - echo (echo)

call like call?

5:58 PM - kane

no call like birdcall
yes call

[6:02 PM : echo (echo) - Incoming Call : 2 hours 3 minutes]
[9:47 AM : kane - Incoming Call : 1 hour 18 minutes]
[2:22 AM : echo (echo) - Incoming Call : 3 hours 13 minutes]
[3:01 AM : kane - Incoming Call : 1 hour 29 minutes]
[4:19 PM : kane - Incoming Call : 58 minutes]
[9:10 PM : echo (echo) - Incoming Call : 2 hours 59 minutes]

But, I digress.

The days jumped haphazardly between humid cloud storms and breezy heat waves, the sun making appearances without courteous precedence and disappearing just as insouciantly. The air seemed in constant argument against itself, damp and dry, heavy and delicate. People either shivered in linen dresses or fanned themselves in cargo jeans, bought out sections of sun hats or cleared out bins of umbrellas, and kept their hoodies alongside their bermuda shorts in drawers. June's mercurial nature sent LA county into their usual whirlwind of dramatized chaos and confusion in the great kick-off of the long-awaited summer, and minded no one's protests that asked for anything less.

"Are you lying on the floor?" I asked.

Kane, Diego, and Zahir all looked up from their place on the hardwood, nine AM glowing in the stark golden lamplight over their bodies. Diego lolled his head to me and said, "Cobayo, you might have the body fat percentage of a pre-teen pixie—"

"Why am I always the first victim?" I sighed.

"—but if you couldn't tell, it's broiling," he said. "Ninety three degrees and broiling. I'm a few hours away from sticking an apple in my mouth and having Ramos serve me for Christmas dinner."

"We can't stay in here," Zahir wheezed, fanning himself with a magazine. "We'll start hallucinating if it gets any hotter. Who put lycans on the top floor?"

Kane sat up. He looked less melted by the heat and more distressed by it, his brows pinched together and his eyes glazed. He rolled his shoulders back, their surface taped with heat patches.

"Get up," he said. "Let's go."

"Go where?" Zahir asked.

"The silver platter?" Diego mumbled.

"K-Town," Kane replied, rising to his feet at a painfully slow pace. "This type of heat warrants an outing and naengmyeon. More bodies in the unit is only making it worse, too." He nudged them with his foot. "Come on. Before you start melting through the floorboards and the basketball team starts complaining about a leak."

I took some water from the fridge and frowned at him. "Right now? K-Town?"

Kane nodded, dragging his feet towards his bedroom. "You've never been, right?" he called. "Get dressed."

"Captain's orders," Diego added, letting Zahir haul up to his feet. "Anywhere that isn't here, is where I'm going."

So, captain's orders.

Zahir and Kenzo were to drive us through the thick of downtown Los Angeles traffic that persisted in all hours of all seasons. Everyone piled into the cars by ten thirty. Peace was difficult with the heat.

"I'm actually gonna melt. Right here. See this? That's my goddamn liver, melting out of me." Wynter pointed at the sweat on her forehead.

Zahir patted her shoulder. "That's sweat, Wynter. Nothing is melting out of you."

"Give it a minute," she promised.

"I hear talking," Kane said from the front seat, his eyes still closed but brow furrowed. "Why do I hear talking?"

"Who's gonna tell him how the eardrum works?"

"Oh, oh, oh!" Meredith lurched forward and pointed. "Valet parking!"

Kenzo took absolutely no care to signal and swerved the car at a ninety degree angle, ignoring the honks and curses sent his way in the process. Meredith screeched and collapsed onto Zoe, who screeched back.

"Not the body heat!" she pleaded. "Anything but more body heat! Kenzo, is the AC even on?"

"Up here," he replied.

"Asshole," we snapped.

He shrugged. The car rolled down into the parking garage.

"You have to tell me how you're surviving in that long-sleeve," Zoe sighed, fanning herself as she gestured at me.

"Better than you would," I told her. "You reek."

She gasped. "You maggot."

"You're more like a meerkat," Zahir said.

"A cat? Did you just call me a cat?"

"Oh, he did," Wynter said with a nod, wiping her forehead. "Start purring, kitty."

"Don't sabotage me," Zahir said. "A meerkat is not a cat, it's—"

"He just called you it again," Wynter egged.

I clambered out of my seat. "Respectfully, Zahir, come here so I can wring your—"

"Sit down." Kane yanked me by the back of my collar, back into the seat.

Meredith said, "I thought a meerkat was a mongoose."

"Are you calling me a goose?" I said. I lurched for her. Kane pushed me back with a finger to my forehead.

"I'm gonna call you something worse if you don't stay still," he snapped.

Kenzo pulled the car up to valet and rolled the window down, sending everyone reeling towards it for the sake of a breeze. He handed over the cash, then the keys, before gesturing for us to get out of the car.

"Oh, bloody hell, the sweet air!" Zoe cried as she clambered out, throwing her hands up to the sky. "Sweet shade!"

Diego slumped over. "I might just sell my melted liver for some ice water."

"Me first," Wynter groaned.

Kane and Kenzo were the highest frequenters of K-Town and therefore were responsible for the itinerary of our day trip. We had to trade extra hours of night practice with Coach to get out of the whole day, but even she'd encouraged it, saying something about clearing our heads and enjoying youth. That and Rosalie had promised to buy her a certain brand of face masks.

We were to stay around for lunch, snacks, and shopping, running amuck along the packed streets and dirtied corners under the gaze of West 8th Street and Wilshire Center. Power lines cut up the sky above, birds perched to watch the bustle of strangers trample the concrete in favor of rushing into noodle houses or chasing down sweet cafes. Signs boasting thick-line Hangul were stacked one on top of the other in big brick or plaster buildings, beckoning in lines of patrons for cream breads, fresh gook, handmade mandu, iced coffees, overseas skincare, teen popstars, red bean treats, foreign souvenirs, and the full summer-saturated, downtown LA experience of modern mainstream Korean culture out in the open for the devouring of locals and tourists alike.

I'd been through K-Town on many occasions, considering Mercy's jobs had me going in all directions and past all neighborhoods at some point or another. I'd probably covered nearly all of Los Angeles County in my years. But, it was to be noted, that I couldn't say I had actually seen any of the places with the intention to.

Korea had lived and died with my mother, for the most part. I spoke it just fine, I could read it just as well, but any other aspect outside of the language was either foggy or forgotten. Being stuck inside closed perimeters, being fed leftovers with no explanation or name, and only ever seeing my father on occasion or my brother by chance or his workers by force, didn't provide much of an education either. It was a slightly debilitating thing to know I was Korean in blood and memories only, the rest of me its stranger.

A familiar feeling, then.

Zoe bumped my shoulder behind me. "Go, go, before my liver melts, too," she giggled. "I'm damn starved."

I tugged at my sleeves. "Right," I murmured. "I'll follow."

Kenzo headed down the street. Wynter, Zoe, and Meredith were busying themselves with pointing out dozens upon dozens of shops that appeared interesting, pointing at the large billboard signs adorning colossal malls or cramped plazas. Kane and I trailed behind the group.

I glanced to my right. "So, what's the hype over this restaurant?"

Kane said, "It's pretty popular for its naengmyeon. I figure since it's hot, it'd be the best option."

"Naengmyeon," I repeated. "Those're the cold noodles, right?"

"You ever had them?"

"No. Are they good?"

"The best," he said, then added, "You've got a lot of dishes to try, huh?"

I just smiled. "You have no idea."

Eventually, we rounded a corner where Kenzo stopped, MDK Noodles in green above our heads. Even I had to admit, just the sound of something fresh and cold sounded well worth a chunk of my Fang Flower pay.

We rushed inside into the sweet welcome of blasting AC, patrons lining the wooden tables to the brim of the glass-windowed restaurant. The scent of fresh soups and spices were pungent beside cleaning agents and cooking oil. Incoming orders or demanding customers filled the air up until the gray ceiling, the hanging lights swinging left and right under powerful gusts of chattering conversation and circulating air. A server with hair more bleach-blond than Kenzo's and scrawny as a lamp post gestured us towards a corner table where Diego and Rosalie were already seated, beckoning us over with no patience.

"Jesus, how did we have prior engagements and yet we got here first?" Rosalie snapped as we sat down in our respective order.

"LA traffic and Kenzo's driving skills," Zahir sighed.

"Or lack thereof," Wynter muttered. "How have you not gotten any tickets?"

"I have."

"How many?"

Kenzo flipped the menu up to his face, raising his hand to ask for napkins.

As Corvus dabbed their faces of their beaded sweat, I scanned over the menu and said, "What's good?"

"Nothing much, you?" Diego said. Rosalie swatted his head with the menu.

Kane took a swig of his ice water. "Bibim naengmyeon. But they give you a lot, so let's share."

"Hey, have some faith in the kid," Diego said. "If he can eat as much as he can talk, I bet he could out-naengmyeon all of us."

I drank my water as Rosalie sneered and said, "True. Make use of that mouth, Yun."

Kane murmured, "Good use."

I choked on my water. Zoe yelped, hurriedly patting my back as I coughed into my sleeve. Corvus gave me quizzical looks.

The waiter re-approached us with an exasperated, "Ready to order?"

I banged my fist on the table and took in a sputtering breath. Kane turned to the waiter and rattled off orders without a blink.

"Bastard," I gasped.

"I don't think that's a dish," Zoe said.

"He means Kane," Wynter deduced.

"Kane isn't a dish."

"But he is delicious," Diego teased, earning a scowl from Kane.

Kenzo turned to me. "Is he?"

I gaped. "What?"

Kenzo turned to the waiter, who was now less exasperated and more confused. "I'll get a mul naengmyeon."

"I'm gonna die before I get these noodles," I wheezed.

"I'm not following," Zahir said.

"Are we still talking about noodles?" Zoe asked.

Meredith smiled at us all, then turned to the waiter. "And one hot stone bibimbap for me, thank you."

The waiter looked among us, then gave a slow nod and collected the menus before hurriedly disappearing out of sight.

I glowered at Kane just as Corvus struck up a brand new conversation to be distracted by. "What have you and Kenzo been gossiping about?"

"Kenzo doesn't ask," he said. "And I didn't say anything."

I slumped against the table. "I can't handle the stress."

"Of what?"

"Frankly, you."

"Sure," he snorted. "Because between the two of us, I'm the more stressful one."

"Well, at least you're self-aware, hwanan sunbae."

Kane elbowed me and I snickered. He set his water down, sliding closer towards me, which nearly made me choke again. He opened the box of metal utensils at the side of the table, handing them out to Corvus set by set. As he did, he said to me, "If you were royalty in Korea, back in the day, you'd eat with metal utensils, because the silver would detect poison in the food." He handed me a spoon and utensils. "But lycans couldn't use silver for obvious reasons. So the rich ones would invest in custom kitchens where they and their guards could watch the chefs from their throne room, and buy jade instead."

"Jade utensils?"

He nodded with an amused ghost of a grin. "They also thought it had healing properties, so if someone in the family was sick, they'd have them eat out of jade dishware, too."

I cocked my head at him. "If I ever get sick, just get me some ibuprofen."

Kane laughed quietly. "My cousin used to buy jade pendants and hang them around my room when I got sick," he went on. "I got mad at her for breaking into my room so she said she'd stop, but I still found one or two lying around if I didn't feel well."

I considered that. "That's nice," I said. "That she did that for you."

Kane pushed the chopsticks to me. His smile looked distant. "It was."

The waiter appeared with a tray of banchan and set out the metal dishes on the table. I took up my chopsticks. Some dishes were familiar, others rather foreign. I pointed at one of brown, gelatinous blocks.

Kane said, "Acorn jelly. It's an acquired taste."

I plucked one up to try it, and grimaced. "Yeah, I can see that."

He snorted. I pointed at one of unrecognizable green veggies. "Seaweed stems," he explained.

I coughed after a mouthful of it. "Salty."

"The spinach is better. And the oi kimchi."

His promise held true. Corvus took note of the dishes' arrivals, picking up their own utensils to dig in. Kane watched them, looking content to let them devour it.

I said, "Was it hard to move to America?"

Kane considered that for a moment. "It was my choice to come," he admitted. "It wasn't the easiest."

"How'd you learn English so well if you didn't speak it at first?"

Kane took a piece of the spicy cucumber from the dish. "I read a lot of books," he explained. "They offered speech at my high school every day after school. A lot of my friends at the time helped me out, made me watch movies and talk to them." He gestured at me. "How'd you learn Korean so well, if you were born here?"

I paused. "I was around a lot of people who only spoke Korean," I said. "They'd only watch Korean shows, too. I worked in the Audrey, and they prefer to speak Korean. It forced me to learn it." I gestured at him. "Are you the oldest back home?"

His laugh was surprised. "No. Youngest, actually."

"You get a break."

"Something like that." Kane's grin was pearl and clouds. "Have you ever wanted siblings?"

I froze. My back burned, the slashes turning red and hot. My brother sat beside me, a second half attached by titanium tissue and ever-flowing blood. I prayed Kane couldn't see the weight of it on my face.

"No," I finally managed. "I've never."

Kane took that gracefully. After a beat, he added, "Would you ever go to Korea if you got the chance?"

I chewed the inside of my cheek, felt the blow of those words like iron knuckles. "I don't know," I admitted. "I've...never gotten that chance."

The waiter appeared bowls on bowls of food, hot and cold alike, and with it, eradicated Kane and I's conversation in favor of returning to solid ground. I stared down at the bowl before me, chock-full of arrowroot noodles, drenched in piping red gochujang and sesame seeds.

"Holy hell," I muttered, staring at the endless mass.

Kane took the scissors placed at our side of the table. "You like spicy, right?"

"Fifty bucks I finish this bowl before Yun and King finish theirs," Diego called.

"I'll take that bet," Rosalie said with a nod.

I raised a brow. "Do you?"

"Rare occasion." He smiled as he sliced up the noodles with one chop after the other.

"How's it feel...to be so wrong?" I gasped.

"Someone get Ramos out here," Rosalie drawled, looking me up and down as I downed my tenth cup of water. "Yun's about to pass out."

"Oh, the lycanism," I sputtered. "My tongue is about to melt out of my mandible."

Diego frowned. "What's a mandible?"

"Shut up, you lost," Rosalie said.

I slumped my head on the table. "Dear God." I lifted my eyes to Kane. "How are you the way that you are?"

"I should be asking you that," he said, sipping his water, far too calm for my liking or respect. "You look like an overripe tomato. The hell is wrong with you? You said you liked spicy."

"Just because you like it, doesn't mean it likes you." I chugged the last of my water. "Fuck this, does anyone have milk? Or a freaking cow? I'll milk the damn thing myself."

"That's a visual I never needed," Wynter muttered.

Kane grabbed a napkin. "Stop drooling, for Christ's sake, where's your dignity?" He pulled my chin to him and wiped my mouth with far too much force to be anything but snide. "You ate that like you'd never get another meal—put that phone down, Meredith."

Meredith put her phone down, but not without a smile.

I waved Kane off of me and whirled on Diego. "Where's my fifty bucks?"

"For those efforts, cobayo, it's all yours."

"If I knew bribing was the main way to get Yun to do shit, I would've pulled out a lot more stops way earlier," Rosalie murmured.

"We're out of water," Zahir said with a sympathetic look my way.

I slumped against my chair. "Just bury me here."

"In five." Kane flagged down the waiter to hand him a credit card.

"I'll pay you back," I gasped.

"I think the stomach lining you've just burned away is payment enough," he said with a grimace.

"I'll pay you back. I just made fifty bucks."

"And lost five years off your life." He shook his head, pushing his water cup to me. I snagged it for dear life. "What are we doing after this?"

"Shopping," Corvus chorused.

"Or a dairy farm," Zoe murmured, frowning at me as I fanned at my mouth. I'd rather take the damn bullet to the stomach.

Kane gave me one aggressive thump on the back before saying, "Shop where?"

"MaDang," Kenzo said. "Daiso."

"You're filthy rich and drive around in a car like that and you still insist on shopping in Daiso," Diego scoffed.

Zahir said, "That's why he's rich."

I said, "Does Daiso have milk?"

"For you? No."

"Wring my neck, Kenzo."

Kenzo looked intrigued. I turned on Kane. "Do something."

Kane closed his eyes as if that would make the whole thing disappear altogether. Meredith clasped her hands as she looked up from her phone.

"I tagged you all," she said. "You, too, Echo."

I stopped. "Wait, you what."

"For your first K-Town outing!" she said with a smile, then leaned in. "I finished up that Instagram of yours."

Corvus startled and lurched forward. "Yun has Instagram?"

I let my forehead fall on the tabletop. "God save me," I groaned.

The waiter set Kane's card before him, and said, "Thank you. Now please leave."

"You need to stop getting me kicked out of places," Kane told me.

"No promises." I took the fifty from Diego. "What do I owe you?"

Kane got up from his seat and headed for the door, cueing the rest of the team to follow suit. As he went, he said over his shoulder, "A fun day." He tilted his head to the exit. "Come on. Let's go."

The heat had become a little much, even I had to admit.

The clouds had come to stay, although the embers in the air were beginning to stoke to higher measures. Everything weighed twice as much on the skin, humid and saturated with moisture. It wasn't a very long walk to this MaDang place, but don't tell that to the lycans.

"You don't look too hot, Rosie," Diego said.

Rosalie wiped her forehead and flipped him off. Zahir fanned himself with a sigh. "This is why we ought to vacation earlier in the season."

"It's eighty six degrees," I said, unimpressed.

"That's eight degrees too hot," Wynter snapped behind me.

Meredith sidled up next to me to show me her phone. "You didn't bring your phone, did you?" she said. I shook my head, and expected Kane to chew me out for it, but surprisingly, I heard no reprimand. Meredith shrugged. "Well, if you want to take a look."

I blinked. "Why?" I asked.

She frowned. "Why what?"

"Why make me a profile?"

She tilted her head, then let a small grin spread on her face. "Friends should keep in touch."

We stopped at a crosswalk. I scrolled through Corvus's profiles, flashing through moments from months to years past. There wasn't anything too surprising, their posts ranging from Corvus to bikes to school to family to coffee runs to study nights. Old friends and old schools, places I'd never been and places I'd never go, the heat momentarily forgotten for some frivolous young bliss.

I returned her phone to her. "Thank you," I told her.

She squeezed my arm. "Don't thank me."

I shoved my hands into the pockets of my shorts. I turned to Kane to see if he'd eavesdropped on the exchange, but he didn't look to be engaged in any conversation of theirs or mine. His eyes were focused on something up ahead as he rubbed at his temples, jaw tight and collar open. If anything, he looked rather uncomfortable.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

Kane took a moment. "What? Oh. I'm all right," he said. "I'm not good in the heat."

I hummed. "So, what's this MaDang place?"

"Plaza," he explained. "Shopping mall of sorts."

"Shop 'til we drop of sorts," Diego corrected. "You just wait, cobayo."

MaDang Courtyard was a K-Town favorite constructed of brick, iron, and stone that married the looming giants of modern city skylines with traditional shadows of Korean architecture. Great big green plants were situated in brutalist pots next to kiosks or stands selling bungeoppang or takoyaki. People devoured corn dogs and bingsu, cream puffs and glutinous donuts, arms full of shopping bags and lengthy receipts. The courtyard was a concrete forest, housing the concrete beast of the modern southern Californian patron.

Like us.

We entered a music store, where the AC was as strong as young girls' perfume and the outstanding colors of teen Korean popstars. Zoe pointed at a pink album encased in plastic. "Hey, hey, Kenzo, these are your dad's girls, yeah?"

Kenzo glanced over his shoulder and nodded. "Sphinxes," he muttered with some disdain.

We circled around to the posters, Kane and Zahir at my back. I passed one of an apparent pixie boy, freckled and hair bluer than was legal. "Kenzo doesn't talk much about his family," I said.

Zahir nodded. "He doesn't talk to his family much," he explained. "His family operates more like mutual business partners more than anything. But I think they prefer it like that. He said it keeps everything simple and clean." He plucked a keychain off the hook and showed it to me to display a young man smiling brightly. "I think his dad helped these guys out with a few songs, right? What's the name? Something with an S."

I slid out of the aisle and back to the group. Kane was leaned against a keycard stand, rubbing his eyes. I said, "Where's Kenzo?"

"Daiso," Kenzo called.

Kane sighed. "Leaving, it seems." He pushed himself upright. "Come on."

We went.

"What're you looking at?"

Meredith appeared at the head of the aisle, smiling down at my hands, which held a pack of Sanrio stickers and sticky notes. I cleared my throat, dropping it. "Er, nothing."

She hummed. "You really do love HELLO KITTY. I thought you hated cats."

I shook my head. "Kitty White is an honorary wolf, and everyone knows that. She's too cool to be a cat."

"You know, not all cats are frivolous."

"But they're sure as hell annoying," I replied. "Except Kitty White. What a girl."

Meredith let out a bright laugh at that. My lip twitched in a grin. We walked further down the aisle, plucking up various stationary and cheap decor. Kane had been whisked away by Zahir and Rosalie for breaking ties on sock and snack shopping. Meredith and Diego were buying out unusual drinks alongside Zoe and Wynter's unmatched, voracious curiosity for strange, useless things. It left me subject to Kenzo's company, which was something to be both grateful and terrified by.

I survived by the skin of my teeth until the candy aisle.

I lifted a bag of marshmallows. I said, "I'm guessing you don't have much of a sweet tooth." He shook his head. "Can I ask you something?" Kenzo didn't answer, which I took as an okay. "Do you keep in touch with your family?"

Kenzo paused. He cocked his head at me. "Do you?" he asked.

I hesitated. "No. Do you?"

"No," he said. "You do."

I went still. "I don't."

Kenzo blinked. He snagged the marshmallows. "You ask a lot of questions that you would never answer. And you lie when you're asked," he said. "What makes you think I'll answer you?"

I stared. It was a hole in my chest, gaping wide and aching from the frays. I shook my head. "What's your problem?"

"What's yours?" His black eyes narrowed, the blond bangs over his brows shrouding the furrow in them. "If I asked, would you tell me?"

"Asked me what?"

"Who's your family?" he said, and my heart stuttered.

Then Rosalie appeared on the other end of the aisle with a, "Hey. We're heading for shaved ice. Is that candy? Yun, you get one more bag of candy, I'll sign you up for a sponsorship from Sensodyne."

I took a step back from Kenzo. "Sorry, we're just talking," I said. "Bingsu?"

"Upstairs. Come on."

I shoved my hands into my pockets. Kenzo turned his back to me.

"For your sake," he said as he went, "don't talk much."

We fled upstairs, his words a haunting beast over my every step.

I found Kane standing with Corvus in a too-lengthy line for bingsu inside a pale cafe, saturated in sugar and fresh coffee. The tables were filled to the brim, and it was a true miracle Wynter had managed to snag one in the back corner at all. Although the mall provided plenty shade, and the store itself was heavily air-conditioned, Kane had small beads of sweat still on his forehead and neck. He looked paler than usual.

"You weren't kidding about the heat," I said, handing him an ice water from the market below.

Kane took it and shrugged half-heartedly. He pushed himself up off the wall. After a beat, he told me, "They have a goguma latte."

"What?"

"Goguma," he repeated. "You liked those snacks I got, the sweet potato ones last week."

I blinked several times over. Then hurriedly tried to ratify with, "Oh. I guess. Sure."

Kane just hummed. He turned to the cashier and fired off the order. Rosalie swatted at his arm. "Stop paying." She paused. "You're not getting anything?"

"Not hungry," he murmured.

We sat down amongst Corvus, who were chattering away and showing off their hauls of the day. Kenzo cocked his head at Kane. "I told you it was too hot. We should've just came here," he said in calm Japanese. Which was a bit strange, considering although it was admittedly warm, it hadn't even crested the high eighties enough to elicit serious heatstroke, even for a lycan.

"Are you a keeper?" Kane muttered.

Even sitting down in the pleasant AC, Kane hadn't gotten any better beside me. Once everyone had finished off their food, he remained rather silent, the sweat on his forehead never leaving on and the ill-color in his skin sticking like glue. He blinked and rubbed his eyes like he was trying to take them out.

Still, when Diego said, "Hey, good chance to pick up dinner here. It's almost four. Let's grab it from that restaurant down the block, yeah?"

Corvus nodded. We got to our feet, and headed back out. The sun rested lightly on us from the clouds, the breeze most welcomed and full of blue chill. I pushed my hands into my pockets, breathing in the city smog and aromas of restaurant kitchens. We headed for the crosswalk. Diego chattered on about the restaurant and its dishes, listing off names or flavors to those that would listen.

I slowed my walk as their conversation drowned out of my ears and sidled up beside Kane. "Thanks, for taking us out."

Kane glanced down at me. His smile was faint, but there nonetheless. "Thanks for coming," he said.

I shrugged. "I'm at the pamphlet's will."

"So you came for the pamphlet's sake?"

"That's admitting there's a pamphlet at all."

"You could admit you enjoy our company."

"You could admit you enjoy mine."

Kane pushed my hair over my eyes. His smile remained, a starry thing in the midst of summer day. "I could," he confessed. "But I won't."

My chest eased. "No," I agreed. "You won't."

__________________

A summer storm struck in the heat of new June only one day after the scorching heat, the night before we were due to compete against the Cal Poly SLO Mustangs in our final Yellow Diamond match. It rendered the entire lower half of California damp and sticky, as gray as fresh steel, blue to a fault. Rain poured down like it'd been holding its breath for months on end, and finally got to exhale in one big tropical flood. The air was heavy with characteristic warmth, bogged down to a swamp by uncharacteristic rainfall.

San Luis Obispo was a sort of paradise of beach, peace, and pastures that was not as horrific as Bakersfield but was not as eminent as Santa Barbara. It was a sort of semi-halfway point between Northern and Southern California, a local-centric town that relied heavily on its collegian population and proximity to Pismo Beach. If you were fine to trade the LA cuisine for the coastal weather, big city diversity for small town whiteness, low-price deals for high-price average, and hustling streets for breezy boredom, then San Luis Obispo was the place for you.

The storm had extended our drive by an hour, leaving us, and above all, Edwards, bone tired the moment we stepped out of the van. The rain had refused to let up as well, pouring down in heavy, humid waterfalls over us as we raced for cover in the night. Since SLO was so small, we were relegated to motels, wherein even the biggest room could only hold two average people and one very, very small pet at best. It left us with two to a room, down the entire line of the first floor, to the owners' delights, and the housekeeping's dread.

Luckily, the Mustangs were at best a respectable team, and one that Corvus had faced a few times in their past, and one they'd always beat in their past, so the most anyone was truly worried about was getting through the day itself. It left everyone eager to return to their rooms for a good night's rest, albeit at the price of picking roommates. In the pouring rain. Against each other.

"Pull straws, rock paper scissors, fight to the death, I don't care, just pick your roommate and get yourselves to bed," Coach said with a yawn. She shoved the key cards into Kane's hand and waved us all off.

Everyone had immediately whirled on Kane. "Not Diego," they all chorused.

"Really?" Coach sighed. "It's pouring! Who cares?"

"I'd rather stand out here and soak through my Moncler before I room with that one," Rosalie said, pointing at Diego.

Diego gasped. "I'm a lovely roommate."

"He talks in his sleep," Rosalie urged as she wrung out the ends of her blonde hair, careful to let the water miss her leather boots. "He has press conferences. With woodland creatures. In his sleep."

"They're very insightful conferences," he tried.

"I'll room with you," Meredith offered through wet red curls.

Diego lit up. "Really?"

"He screams, too," Kenzo said, earning an elbow.

Meredith pursed her lips. "Well, then."

"Meredith. You can't believe him over me."

"Believe me," Kenzo said.

"Well, the joke is on all of you, because I'm rooming with my loyal Zahir," he said, and grinned brightly over at Zahir, who was busy trying to hide his phone from the rain.

"You do scream. In between conferences," Zahir said. "So, I'll take someone else."

Wynter looped her arm with Zoe's. "Anyone but us."

"You can't exempt yourself from the Diego lottery," Rosalie argued, shaking her head. "Everyone is subject to the roulette."

"I think there's a sea in my shoes, guys," I said, and wiped the rainwater from my face. "Like, a rising sea."

"Define 'scream'," Meredith said. "Bloody murder? Original Scream? TikTok audio?"

Kane didn't bother with any of us. He shuffled up the key cards in his hands, then handed them out one by one to each of us. "There, those are your rooms. Now get to bed, we're up by nine tomorrow for conditioning."

Everyone looked down, then shook their heads. They discussed and traded or defended their cards accordingly until Zoe was with Rosalie, Wynter was with Meredith, Diego was with Zahir, and Kenzo got the single room because he paid Zahir fifty bucks just to trade.

By the unrighteous hand of God, Kane and I ended up with a room.

I looked down at my sea-filled shoes. "Maybe I'll stay out here," I murmured. "They say rain is good for sleep."

Kane cocked a brow. "Be my guest."

Meredith looked between us, humming. "How...coincidental," she said.

Kenzo looked between us. "Very."

Zoe frowned. "What's very?"

Kane spun on his heel. "Go to bed, for fuck's sake."

"Love you!" they called.

We held our key cards, and dispersed in the storm.

Kane flicked the light on, letting the aged golden bulb illuminate the room. There was a small bathroom at the other end, a bed in the center, two bed stands available for storage and one dresser hosting a tiny TV equipped with nothing but nine channels and static. The hardwood floor was slippery with our dripping hair and clothes. The paint was peeling in the corners, blue plaster a poor mirror of SLO's seaside.

We glanced at the bed. I said, "Nice bed."

Kane said, "Small bed."

I said, "Okay bed."

Kane yanked off his Timberlands and pushed them against the wall. He placed his duffel on one of the bed stands and pried off his leather jacket. "Hang up your clothes, let them dry," he told me.

I didn't know how much my hoodie could dry considering it looked straight out of the washer, but I obeyed anyway. I shucked off my soaked sneakers and headed for the bathroom.

I turned on the stark white light and tore my hoodie off to drape it over the shower bar. I faced myself in the mirror to wash the rainwater and dirt from my hands. My shirt hadn't been saved though, the collar and sleeves clinging to my skin, droplets settling on my eyelashes and lips. My hood had made no effort to save my hair, leaving most of it soaked up until the roots.

I sighed, frowning at the hoodie. I got all of a moment to mourn it, before a towel landed on top of my head.

"Are you trying to catch a cold?" Kane said, and a second later, hands were rubbing the towel roughly back and forth on my wet hair. "Who the hell wears a cotton hoodie in the pouring rain? I know you own a raincoat. Kenzo bought you one at the mall."

"I have an ongoing moral protest against Kenzo and that includes not wearing anything he gave me," I snapped from under the towel. "Besides, it pisses you off, so I count it as a win."

Kane pushed the towel up to give me a look. "You're a pain," he murmured.

I scoffed. "You're not bone-dry yourself," I muttered, gesturing up at his dripping locks.

"Just get on the counter, you're tracking water everywhere. Wet hair and you'll catch a cold."

I shrugged, but got atop the counter. Kane grabbed another towel to wrap around his own neck as he finished drying my hair. I tried not to think too hard about his hands sponging up the water as if I was a child, years ago, my mother leaning over the tub and laughing at the way my hair went every which way when she pulled the towel off. I traced the black lines on Kane's skin, the curve of them around his throat.

"Does it get worse in the heat?" I asked. "The silver."

Kane paused. He frowned at me. "It can," he admitted. "Why?"

"You didn't seem that good in K-Town."

"I was tired."

"But the heat doesn't help."

"Does it ever with lycans?"

"Is it getting worse?"

Kane purposely placed the towel over my eyes. He said, "Let's talk about something else, Echo."

I took that without questioning. I suppose there was little space to think about such a thing when Green Diamond was right around the corner. I said, "Do you like traveling?"

Kane pulled the towel back up. He let it fall around my neck, and leaned his hands on either side of my legs. I watched the mole by his brow move as he considered the question.

"I guess it's nice," he admitted. "I've only been a few places for fun."

"Like what?"

Kane eyed me. "Sometimes I think you're trying to write my biography," he said, his lip twitching. He shrugged. "Korea. I've been to Tokyo once."

"That's it?"

"Racing season being year-round doesn't leave much break time," he admitted. "What about you? You've never even been outside California."

"I'm pretty sure California is the only state that will take me," I said.

"We go outside of it during Green and Red."

"Well, God help the USA."

Kane laughed, the dimple at the side of his mouth threatening to break one of my ribs. "God help," he agreed. His hands brushed against mine.

"You're supposed to disagree, tell me they'd be lucky to have me," I argued.

"I'm not that good of a liar," he said. I could hear the sound of my rib cracking in time with the lightning outside. His hand grazed my wrist, the water dripping from his hair sliding down his throat.

"Well," I murmured, leaning forward. "Good thing I am."

He tasted like rainwater and nighttime, the smoke of a cigarette still on his teeth. His hands found my waist and pressed me against the mirror, the cool glass pressing against each vertebrae of my spine. I tore fingers into his hair and kissed him until it bruised. Kane dragged his fingers from my hands to my neck, pushing them into the pulse, tracing its blood flow into my chest, my hip, along my thigh. His thumb ran along the seams of my jeans just as his tongue ran down a tendon in my neck.

"Drying my hair," I muttered. "You were just trying to trap me."

"Give me some credit," he said, and his breath was hot where the rain had cooled my skin. "Maybe I really cared."

I scoffed. "Shut up."

"Echo Yun, telling someone to shut up," he said. He laughed, cruelly, a low and soft thing against my skin that gathered all the lightning in the sky to run between every vertebral disc in my spine. "Jaemisseo."

I didn't even have the mind to retort.

Our hips pushed against each other, and I nearly fell right off the counter altogether at the feeling of him against me. I tugged him into a kiss, heat blooming like a menace in my stomach. Kane wrapped my legs around his waist. A sample shampoo went flying courtesy of my knee and clattered on the tile. I hissed out a curse. Kane laughed.

He pushed his thumbs into the space above my pelvis, a precarious position situated right above the brand on my hip. I pulled my hands from his neck and under the hem of his damp shirt instead to still his hands before they got curious. He let me hike up his shirt to feel the indents of his spine and shoulders, until he pulled away just enough for me to yank it off completely.

Mercy wouldn't kill me if she saw me. She'd probably cut me up into a thousand and four little pieces, then burn the pieces, then burn the ashes of. I looked Kane up from the brand on his hip to his head of wet hair, the water running over black ink and bare skin. His shoulders were soaked, his body warm and real under my hands, his heartbeat a thumping rabbit under my palm. It seemed illicit just to feel it.

I drew my hand down from his heart to his stomach, the front of his pants. He jolted, teeth sinking into my shoulder.

I yelped. My other hand sunk their nails into his back and scratched. Kane cursed, yanking his mouth off me. "You trying to draw blood?" he snapped.

I hurried, "I feel no remorse. Amugeosdo."

"Who's hwanan now?"

"Why don't you take your jokes and shove 'em?"

"Where?"

"Who are you?"

Kane pushed his damp hair back, the light illuminating his face in full.

"I have serious brain damage," I murmured. Kane opened his mouth, but I said, "Stop. I'll scratch you again."

He hummed. "All right."

I gaped. He shrugged. I shook my head. "I'm having a fucking seizure, in the form of a six foot lycan."

"Considering how many four eleven lycan seizures I've suffered," he said, "I think you'll live."

"I'm four eleven and a half."

"Says who?"

I gawked. Kane laughed again, deep in his chest and rough at its edges. The sound infested my lungs, and  I kissed Kane to swallow it down, my tongue running over the line of his bottom teeth. I pressed the base of my palm against his diaphragm, felt the shape of his ribs, pushed my hips against his, felt the shape of him. He moved his hand along my stomach.

I pushed myself off the counter. He stumbled back. "What's wr—"

"How come everyone has to listen to you when you say 'stop talking' but you get to chat it up when I say it?" I murmured.

I pressed him against the wall beside the shower. The heat beneath my skin burned off the water from my body, made my fingers shake and my heart scream for air. Kane's ears were red, the flush dotting his cheekbones, all the way to his pitch black eyes. Oy vey for me.

Well, I supposed if I was going to be an idiot, I might as well run with it well.

I undid the buttons of his jeans. His fingers curled around the back of my neck, nearly bruising the skin there. I tried with futile effort to keep my hands fucking still.

Kane murmured, "You don't have to." He held my wrist still. "You've never."

I considered that, then shrugged. "I'm good at thinking on the fly." I sank to my knees.

I had half a temptation to linger on the brand and mark on his hip, right near the jutting shape of bone and skin. I settled for tugging away at the last layers of clothing, my heartbeat in my temples, until I could reach him. June was a spider up my spine, slinking down my fingertips. Kane's fingers had moved from my neck to my hair, which I partially wished he wouldn't do considering the sensation wasn't helping the ripping in my chest.

I leaned out of their reach, and took him into my mouth.

I figured there was a right way, perhaps a strategic way, to do it, but I'd have to figure it out later. I pressed my tongue against his skin, letting my jaw fall open as I waned forward. Kane's fingers tugged on my hair, droplets of rain trailing down my chin and throat, cold as ice when they cooled. I wondered if he could feel the magma building up in my stomach and crawling up my esophagus. I steadied myself with my hands against his stomach and thighs. I could feel him at the edge of my tongue, in the back of my throat, crawling under every nerve in my skin.

Kane pressed his hand gently against the back of my head and groaned. It felt like the storm had traveled into the vicinity of my lower gut, swirling around with a thunderous ruckus. I moved my jaw around him, my lips wet with the effort. I had a moment of foolishness to look up, just to catch Kane's violet gaze looking down at me. Forget a storm. There was a Category 5 hurricane in my stomach.

We moved rather languid for all the rushing in the rest of my body, maybe for seconds or maybe for hours. Long enough at least that my jaw felt ready to break off and my lips felt permanently swollen. Kane's sharp breaths and groans, although rather quiet, were like cacophonies in my ears. I twisted my tongue, opened my lips wider. Kane's grip faltered and he said something or other that got drowned out as he tried to pull me off. I figured it was an encouragement, and I sunk as far as I could open my throat for, my nose hitting his stomach.

It took another moment for me to realize it was, in fact, a warning.

I grunted, then choked altogether, my vision blurring blue and white. I pulled my mouth off and wiped my lips, thumping on my chest as I coughed into the hazy air.

"Christ," Kane muttered. He grabbed the towel from his neck and pulled my chin towards him. He bent down and wiped my mouth. "Are you out of your mind? You're out of your mind."

I steadied myself and gave a clumsy shrug. "It's not bad." I figured it was likely I'd swallowed far worse things.

Kane shook his head. "Don't say that," he muttered. "I'll think I'm out of my mind."

He bundled up the towel and threw it in the nearby wicker hamper. I looked at his face turned away from me, the water still dripping down his temples, the harsh fluorescent light on his skin, on the mole by his brow. The flush had flooded his face, ear to cheek to nose. My jaw burned something fierce, and my throat was in borderline agony, but I still had the insanity to laugh.

"What's funny?" he said.

"I think," I murmured, "I've lost a lot of blood."

"What?"

"Nothing. Help me up."

Kane helped me up. He'd tucked himself back in, although his jeans were still undone, which really wasn't helping my theory. He reached for me, but I shook my head.

""Don't worry about it." He looked affronted at that. I added, "I...don't wanna take my shirt off."

He raised a brow. "You don't have to."

I frowned. "No?"

Kane pushed me back up against the counter until I hoisted myself back up, albeit clumsily considering my muscles were weaker than parchment and I was still dizzy. He seemed to see something in my frown, because he added, "I won't look."

"What?"

"I don't care what I see, but I won't look."

He'd definitely fucking care if he saw the obvious not-Beta mark on my hip, but my head was so far gone that I said, "Good for you. Don't look."

Kane's grin was a heart attack. His kiss was downright cardiac arrest.

I had half the mind to tell him it was rather unhygienic to kiss me, but the words died on my tongue when he popped open the buttons on my jeans. My hands gripped his jaw, his teeth knocking against mine, as his hand slipped down. I held his face like I held a gun, the bullets half as loud but my nerves twice as shaken.

He seemed to have more of a mind of what to do, his fingers unhesitant and his grip tight. I groaned into his mouth. I said something, either a curse or his name or something of a combination. His hand moved and my knees dug into his sides, lightning in my gut. There was too much skin, too much heat, the air heady and unbearable.

I sank my teeth into his shoulder. The nerves of my spine went up in flames. I gasped against his throat, pulled my hips up into his hand, and groaned.

Kane took my towel from my neck. As promised, he turned his back to me, never glancing down, and cleaned his hand off before offering it to me. It took me a few moments to remember just what was going on and still my hands long enough to clean what I could.

I handed him the towel and he tossed it in the hamper. I re-buttoned my jeans, but knew I'd be fucking myself over if I tried to get off the counter, so I settled for slumping against the mirror instead.

It took me a minute to realize he was standing in front of me, waiting. I tugged at my shirt's collar. I said, "I think I've got a fever."

Kane softened at that, then let out a laugh. I shook my head. "Stop laughing."

"I'm not laughing at you." He settled between my legs.

I sat up and closed my eyes as I laughed into my hands. "I think you're breaking me," I muttered. "What kind of captain are you?"

I opened my eyes, just to see Kane peering at me with an amused look. "Fair one," he said. "We're even."

I blinked. I stared, sighed. "You'll kill me," I muttered. "Mar me where I stand."

"You've got Green Diamond soon," he said. "Don't die yet." Kane turned away to head back towards the bed, the silver and black scars on his skin shimmering under the light. "Get to bed, we have to get up early." He paused. "Make sure to brush your teeth."

"That's just low."

His laugh was crisp in the air, reverberating in my chest.

I pushed my palm against my heart, and tried to remember how to breathe.

___________________

"Maybe I ought to bench you more often, Yun," Coach scoffed as I snagged an orange from Ramos during halftime the next day. "You seem pretty relaxed for this match."

I shrugged from my place on the bench. "Brain damage. Helps my depth perception."

Corvus stared at me. Ramos shook her head. "He's joking."

I said, "Sure."

Kane handed the third-to-last water bottle out to Zoe, finishing his round with one for himself and one for me. He said, "He's not."

"How do you know?"

"You didn't even pay attention to us the first half, you were too busy talking to Ramos. Coach is just being nice."

"Nice. You should try that some time."

"You're like a cat that got wet."

"Did you just call me a cat? Did he just call me a cat? You fucker, say that to my face."

Coach sighed. "But I see you've still got a mouth on you."

I took a swig of my water. Kane shrugged. "Quite a mouth," he murmured.

I choked on my water at that. Zoe thumped me hard on the back as Corvus sent curious looks my way.

"You okay, Yun?" she asked.

I gasped for air. "Peachy," I wheezed.

Kane smiled around his water.

Coach said, "Don't wanna know. Now, who's ready to win this thing and get the hell back home?"

Now that was a unanimous yes.

When Corvus drove out of San Luis Obispo, 160 to 120 Corvus's favor, Yellow Diamond cleared and Green Diamond on the road ahead, it almost felt like I could celebrate alongside them with nothing but that in mind. Excited chatter filled the van on how to celebrate when we returned to Avaldi, the storm long cleared to leave the night crisp and clear for the taking. I leaned against the window, exhaustion of the past few weeks settling deep into my bones.

A tap on my hand made me glance to my right.

Kane stared straight ahead, but his hand shifted between us, his fingertips brushing against mine in the shadows of the van. I swallowed. But against all rational odds, didn't move my hand away.

Kane said, "Hey."

I found my voice. "Hey," I murmured, "is for horses."

Kane curled his fingers under mine, and nearly sent me into shock. "You're back on the track soon," he said.

"You miss me that much?" I scoffed.

Kane tilted his head back and closed his eyes. "You said it."

We rode the rest of the way to the Talon to the sound of Corvus's cheer and our hands in the shadows between us. Victory trailed behind, with a new one up ahead, bright as diamonds, and sweeter than aspartame.

Corvus rode for it at full speed.

(ty for reading, the little star and i are ever so grateful for your presence :)) have you ever tried bingsu?)