This is the second part of today's double update! If you haven't read Chapter 28 - One Step Closer please do! (And don't forget to vote for both!!)

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"I'm getting to it," he sighed. "I have to tell you everything in the order it happened, so you understand it all."

I stared at him and swallowed hard, wiping my palms on my trousers.

"There were paps outside the hotel when I got into the car. I knew then that Sara would have been papped too, and it would only be a matter of time before the story broke. I wanted to call you, but I was so fuckıng scared, Jess. You were the one person I needed right then, and you were the one person I couldn't call. I knew you'd be devastated. I can't even begin to explain how I was feeling. I've never, ever been unfaithful to anyone in my life. I had no intentions of ever being unfaithful to you. I honestly couldn't believe I'd done it."

He paused and took a deep breath, and I watched him, wondering why he was so upset by all of this when by his own admission he'd never been in love with me.

"I called Karen from the car, and told her everything. She couldn't believe it either. She literally yelled at me for five minutes solid. Not just about the drugs, but about being unfaithful to you. She asked me why I'd done it, but I didn't have an answer. By the time I came off the phone I was about to have a breakdown. I was sitting in the back of the car crying like a fųcking child. We got to the airport but my flight wasn't for several hours - we were really early because I'd just wanted to get out of the hotel. I sat in the private lounge literally in a daze. Karen called me back and said the photos would be on the Daily Mail any moment, along with the story, and she couldn't do anything about it because all they'd done was print the pictures of us hugging goodbye, and the pictures of us leaving the hotel. I knew I had to ring you before you saw the article, but I put it off - I knew once I made the call that would be it, you would be out of my life forever and I couldn't bear that thought. I couldn't even call Mum or Gemma because I couldn't face their disappointment, so I called Louis instead and told him everything. He was speechless, for about five seconds. Then he yelled at me for being a dıckhead, and yelled at me again when I said I had to confess everything to you. He said I could get away with it and say the paps made a story out of nothing, but I couldn't lie to you again, not about that. I had to face up to it, even though I knew you'd hate me and our relationship would be over."

I couldn't move, or speak, or think. I was transfixed by Harry and his story, and by the way he was talking about me; about us.

"Eventually I had to bite the bullet and call you," he continued. "You broke my heart Jess. I was expecting you to scream at me. But you didn't. You said -" He faltered, and blinked hard. "You said, 'I trust you, Harry.'"

His voice broke on the last word, and he put his head down and covered his eyes with one hand. I stayed frozen to the spot, staring at him, my heart pounding.

"You trusted me," he choked. "After everything I did, you'd seen the pictures and you trusted me anyway. That broke me."

"Yeah, well, I was wrong, wasn't I?" I said, finally finding my voice. "I was wrong to trust you."

"Yes," he nodded, his voice loaded with emotion. "You were. I should never have put myself in that situation. It was my fault, all of it. I brought it on myself."

"What are you talking about?" I snapped, suddenly becoming weary of these cryptic statements.

"It was a long chain of events," he sighed. "I'm getting there, just bear with me."

"Maybe I'm fed up of bearing with you!" I shouted, getting to my feet again and backing away from him. "You can't just turn up here and expect me to sit here and listen to all these cryptic clues, trying to make sense of all this! You do this every time, Harry!"

"I know - I'm trying to be honest with you," he said softly. "There is so much to it Jess, and it's all important, I promise."

"Well maybe I'm bored of listening to it," I sniped. "Maybe I'm bored of this whole dramatic episode in my life. Maybe I'm just trying to move on, but you keep appearing, uninvited, trying to drag me back down again." (I cringed at the reference I'd accidentally made, and thought I saw the vaguest twitch of Harry's lips.)

"You need to hear this," he said, and I saw red.

"Why are you so convinced you know what I need?!" I shouted. "Has it ever crossed your self-obsessed mind that maybe I don't need any more of your shįt? Did it ever occur to you, even for one second, that maybe I don't need to know why you felt the need to ride the cockhorse to Banbury Cross on your little jaunt to New York, and that maybe, just maybe, I didn't want to see you today?"

He opened his mouth to speak, but I cut across him.

"No, because you never stop to think about what I want, do you?!" I screamed. "You're so used to everybody bowing down before you, and obeying your every whim, that it doesn't even enter your head to ask me whether I want my life turned upside down by your whirlwind again! You asked me, repeatedly, to meet up with you. I told you, repeatedly, that I didn't want to. But did that stop you? NO! You went against my wishes and just turned up here to see me, because the great Harry Styles knows best! No one ever says no to you, do they? So when someone, i.e. me, does say no, it doesn't even register with you! You just charge in anyway, destroying everything in your wake and expect me just to accept it! Oh, so Harry thinks I need to know the truth? Well I'll have to know it then, won't I, if he says so!"

My chest was heaving with emotion as I screamed these words at him and he just sat there on the bed in a stunned silence, his eyes wide and his mouth half open.

"It's always been the same, Harry!" I ranted, furiously. "You flit in and out of my life whenever it suits you, and just expect me to go along with it. You turn up at my parents' house when I ignore your calls. You turn up at my flat after I tell you to leave me alone. You turn up at my office in London when I tell you I don't want to stay friends, and not content with that, you drive all the way to bloody Cardiff to force me to see you! You can't have your own way all the time! You need to learn that is not how relationships work!"

"Jess," he protested weakly. "Jess, I'm so sorry... I didn't think..."

"That's the whole problem!" I bellowed. "You never do! You just do what you want and everyone else has to fall in with it!"

"Now hang on, that's not fair," he began. "I'm not like that - you know I'm not."

"You're exactly like that!" I argued. "You don't even realise you're doing it! Well I am sick of it, Harry. I'm sick of being your little puppet that you think you can control! I should never have agreed to talk to you, and I am telling you now I want you to leave!"

"Where is all this coming from?" he asked, his tone hardening. "I've never treated you that way. I know I messed everything up in New York, but you're bringing up the past and twisting it to use against me, and that isn't fair."

"No, I'll tell you what isn't fair!" I screamed. "When your boyfriend makes you fall in love with him and then the first chance he gets he fųcks a rake behind your back and then makes you relive every detail when you're trying to get over him!"

"I'm trying to explain what happened!" he shouted back. "It wasn't your fault! It was all down to me, because I put my trust in the wrong people, and I let you down! If you'd just stop screaming at me for five minutes and let me finish, you'll understand!"

"I don't want to understand!" I hurled at him. "I'm quite happy in blissful ignorance, thank you! You should understand that term - the model you traded me in for is probably on that same intellectual level."

"Why are you being like this?" he yelled. "I'm trying to do the right thing and all you're doing is throwing it back in my face! This isn't the Jess I fell in love with!"

"Yes and ask yourself why!" I screamed. "You ruined me, Harry! You ruined me with your lies and your runaway dïck! You did this. You broke my trust and you can't fix it."

"Your trust was never there to start with," he spat. "You always thought the worst of me, every single time. Maybe I finally got fed up and gave you a real reason!"

There was a stunned silence.

"Did you?" I asked, horrified. "Is that why you did it?"

"No - of course not, I never should have said that," he said, the colour draining from his cheeks. "I'm sorry."

"Is it any wonder I don't trust you when you throw things like that in my face?" I ranted. "I will never trust you. I would always be wondering what you're doing when you're away from me, and that's not healthy. I couldn't live like that."

"You did trust me though," he said, suddenly calm again, and sad. "Once. The one time I let you down was the one time you had faith in me."

I laughed derisively. "More fool me."

"Don't say that," he begged, his eyes staring miserably into mine.

"It's the truth!" I screeched. "I am so sick of you ruining my life, Harry! Your shagging around, your cryptic instagram pictures, your let's-be-friends text messages and this whole fuckıng mystery surrounding New York! I don't want to listen to it anymore! I want out, OK? I want out!"

I collapsed on the bed in tears again, and he moved closer to me to put his arms around my shoulders.

"Don't, Harry," I cried softly, but he tightened his grip around me and I rested my forehead against his collarbone as I sobbed. "See what I mean?" I said, when I could finally speak again. I pulled away from him and wiped my eyes. "I tell you not to, and you do it anyway."

He looked at me with the saddest expression on his face. "Did it ever cross your mind that sometimes you don't know what you need until it's standing in front of you?"