July 2015

Nicki had no news for me for the rest of that week. The only news I received was that Harry had flown to LA; Sarah saw pictures of him on Twitter arriving at LAX, and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

I wasn't sure why, but I wasn't as broken as I had expected to be. Considering I had found out Harry had cold-heartedly set me up for his own gain I was surprisingly accepting of it all, and had gone into survival mode. I still thought about him a large proportion of the time, and these thoughts still caused me pain, but it wasn't an all-consuming, gut-wrenching pain like it had been in previous times.

(I realise the fact that there were previous times to compare this to in itself spoke volumes, and maybe this was the reason I was able to approach it with a steely resolve, rather than with a trembling lip.)

My subconscious had decided for me that I was not going to let this overwhelm me, and instead was going to show the world I could pick myself up and carry on regardless. And I wholeheartedly agreed with her.

By the time Saturday came around I was almost looking forward to my date with Adam, if only to take my mind off everything and forget my chaotic life for a bit. I had arranged to meet him at Mango Room in Camden which was only a five minute tube ride away from me, so I took my time getting ready, and arrived at bang on eight o'clock. He was standing just outside, and smiled as I approached him.

"Hi," he said, and leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "You look stunning."

"Thanks," I replied, smiling too. "You don't look so bad yourself."

He grinned at this, and gestured towards the door of the restaurant. "Shall we?"

"Sure."

He opened the door for me (ten points for being the gentleman) and I walked inside. We were seated straight away, and ordered a bottle of wine between us. The waitress poured us a glass each and handed us our menus before walking away and leaving us to it.

"Have you been here before?" he asked as I scanned the starters.

"No, I hadn't even heard of it," I said. "I don't think I've ever had Caribbean food before. Not in a restaurant like this, anyway." Harry and I had never ventured over this way, that I could recall.

"Me neither," he said. "But my brother recommended it so I thought we could give it a try."

"You have a brother?" I asked. "Me too. And a sister."

"Really? I also have a sister," he said. "She's younger than me though. My brother's older, so I'm the middle child. Apparently there's a whole syndrome attached to that."

"Me too!" I laughed. "I mean, I'm the middle child too. Older brother, younger sister."

"Is he a protective older brother?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes. He's terrible. He doesn't know where to draw the line."

"Really?" Adam grinned. "I can sort of identify with that, though. I'm the same over my sister."

"I bet you don't intercept her phonecalls and ask what a guy's intentions are towards her though," I remarked, before I realised what I was saying. My stomach twisted painfully at the memory of Harry but I managed to keep my face straight.

"No," he laughed. "I've never done that. That's bad. What else has he done?"

I shook my head. Why was I even going into this? "He threatened to break my ex's legs if he ever hurt me. Threatened to break his face... He didn't though," I added quickly after a look of alarm passed over Adam's face.

"Didn't what? Break anything?"

"No, he didn't break anything. Although I think he may have done if he'd had a proper opportunity. Anyway, moving on. I bet your sister has it hard with two older brothers looking out for her."

"Yeah, she's seventeen and has just got her first proper boyfriend. I haven't met him yet, but she's already given me a lecture on what I'm allowed to say and what I'm not allowed to say to him."

"I tried that with Calvin," I grinned. "He didn't take a blind bit of notice."

"I don't blame him," he smiled. "I'd be protective over someone as beautiful as you."

I blushed at his words and quickly averted my eyes. It felt strange hearing things like this from someone other than Harry. I felt a bit uncomfortable, like I was somehow being unfaithful, before I mentally shook myself. I needed to get a grip.

"So, how do you know Nick Grimshaw?" Adam asked.

Oh, fųck.

I cleared my throat. "Um, only through friends. I only met him for the first time earlier this year."

"Really? He seemed to know you pretty well. I assumed you were good friends or something."

I could feel my palms sweating at the subject getting dangerously close to Harry.

"Not really. He's friends with my ex so I sort of knew him a bit because of that... but we were only together a couple of months so I never really got that close to Nick."

"Who's your ex? Was he there the other night in Covent Garden?"

Fuuuuuuuuuck.

"No, he wasn't. You won't have met him. He works away a lot."

"Ah right," he nodded. "That must be relief. I can imagine it could potentially be awkward if you had to see him all the time, especially if it ended badly."

"Yeah, it wasn't great," I muttered.

"Oh really? Why?"

I hesitated. I really didn't want to get into this but I wasn't sure how to avoid answering without being rude.

"Oh God, I'm sorry," he said, probably seeing the look on my face. "I speak before I think sometimes. What you see is what you get with me. I didn't mean to be nosey."

I felt instantly at ease, and smiled.

"It's fine. It was a messy breakup, but it was sort of inevitable from the word go, so it all fell apart pretty spectacularly."

"Oh... I'm really sorry... that must have been tough. I'm sorry I asked you."

He looked so uncomfortable I started to laugh. "It's fine," I chuckled. "Really. I just want to put it behind me."

"Sometimes I think I should have my words approved by someone qualified before I let them out of my mouth," he said, and I laughed harder.

"Oh God," I wheezed. "That's usually me. I have a tendency to say what I think, regardless of whether or not it's appropriate."

He grinned. "OK, that makes me feel a bit better."

"Good," I smiled.

"Tell me to shut up if I cross the line again," he said.

"Deal," I nodded, and the waitress arrived to take our food order.

~~~

"So have you always lived in London?" he asked after we'd finished eating.

"No, I only moved here when I finished my degree and got this job," I replied. "My grandparents died when I was really young and left money aside for me, Maddie and Calvin, to pay the deposit for each of us on our first home. Calvin moved out into his own place a couple of years before me, and then I bought my flat in London. Everyone tried to convince me it would be a bad idea to buy a place of my own in the city but I just didn't see the point in throwing money away on rent when I could be paying off a mortgage. So I took the plunge and here I am."

"Wow," he said. "I take it you don't regret it?"

I hesitated. "No, not until recently, but I'm starting to think it would be nice to get away from London and I'm sort of tied now because I can't just up and leave my flat. Whereas if I were just renting it wouldn't be an issue."

"Why would you want to leave?" he asked, twirling the stem of his wine glass between his fingers. It reminded me of when Harry had done the same thing at Project in LA after I had refused to kiss him in the booth in case anyone saw. I wished everything would stop making me think of him.

I hesitated again. "I just fancy a change. You ever feel like you just want to get away from everything you know and start again?"

He cocked his head to the side and looked at me thoughtfully. "Sort of, sometimes, I suppose. I'm guessing this breakup affected you pretty badly huh?"

I snapped my head up and stared at him.

"Oh - shıt - sorry," he said, looking embarrassed. "There I go again. I didn't think. I was jumping to conclusions."

"No, it's fine - am I just an open book or something?" I asked, curiously.

He smiled. "No, but Callie told me your ex treated you pretty badly and I sort of put two and two together. I'm really sorry. I feel like I'm speaking out of turn here. I'm messing this up, aren't I?"

"What else did Callie tell you?" I asked.

"Nothing really. Just that you'd been messed around and she wanted to kick him in the - you know - and she wanted you to move on. I hope I haven't dropped her in it." He looked worried.

"No," I sighed. "I just don't want you taking me out on a pity date because of some obligation or anything."

His eyes widened and he looked at me in surprise.

"Are you kidding me? Even if that was the case - which I assure you it wasn't - I am by no means getting the raw end of the deal here. I get to wine and dine a beautiful, funny, intelligent girl. This is no pity date."

I blushed again. "OK," I said, shyly.

"And I may be jumping the gun massively here, but I'd really like to do this again," he said. "I know that's usually an end-of-the-night discussion but I think you've realised by now I have no control over what comes out of my mouth, so what the hell."

No Contro-o-o-ol.

I grinned. "Yeah, I figured that out. And yes, I'd like to do it again too."

"Great," he said.

We finished off our drinks, and while he told me about his parents' art gallery, his brother's involvement in the family business and how he himself had ended up working in Marketing I stared at him, studying his face and his mannerisms. He was a good looking guy. His hair was darker than Harry's, and short and straight. His eyes were a lovely shade of blue, and they sparkled when he talked. He had no dimples, but he had really nice white teeth. He was a few inches taller than me, even though I was wearing heels, and he was stockier than Harry. His body was broader overall. He wasn't the type to pull off super-skinny jeans. Maybe that was a good thing.

"So would you like to go on for a drink somewhere?" he asked as the waitress brought the bill over.

I pulled my purse out to offer to pay my way, but he waved me away. "This is on me," he said. "I asked you out. I'm paying."

"You don't have to," I argued. "I'm happy to split it."

But he shook his head firmly. "I'm sure you are, and I appreciate the offer, but no."

"Will you let me buy you a drink if we go on somewhere after this?" I asked.

"I'd rather you let me be the gentleman," he smiled.

"And what if I insist?" I pressed, and he gave me a lopsided smile that was rather cute.

"Well then I would let you buy me one, but then I would buy the rest."

"OK, well, we can argue about that later," I said breezily. "But the next one is on me."

He gave me a mock-exasperated look. "I can see you're going to be handful."

I laughed. "Yes, you got that right. Come on. I owe you a drink."

Adam paid the bill and we stepped outside into the balmy evening air. "I know a place called The Abbey Tavern - it's got a lovely roof terrace," he suggested.

"Sounds good to me," I agreed, and he put his hand lightly on my back to guide me down the road. It reminded me of Harry, of course, doing this same thing at the house party and at LAX. I pushed this thought away impatiently. This poor guy had treated me perfectly all evening, and all I could do was think of Harry, and compare him to Harry. Harry wasn't even worth giving the time of day. Why couldn't I just forget about him and move on?

We arrived at the bar and I stuck to my guns and bought the drinks. The roof terrace was busy but we managed to find a table, and sat down in a corner looking down onto Kentish Town Road.

"I would miss this," I confessed, "if I moved out of London. I'm sure everywhere has nice bars, bustling streets and summer evenings, but there's just something about London that stands above the rest. There's a sort of excitement to it. The air is electric. I don't think you get that in the same way anywhere else."

He was looking at me thoughtfully again. "You have a way with words, you know."

I blinked. "Do I?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "You can be quite poetic without realising. And I can sound really stupid without realising." He rolled his eyes and I laughed.

"You don't sound stupid," I said. "You're paying me a compliment. It's flattering, thank you."

"Flattering and lame," he said.

"No, flattering and sweet," I insisted.

"Sweet. That's not quite what I was going for. Sweet isn't manly."

I laughed again. "Sweet works for me."

"Really?" he teased, and I nodded. "Well then I'm happy," he nodded too.

"Shall I get some more drinks?" he asked as I finished my glass of wine, but I glanced at my watch and shook my head.

"I'll have to get going," I said. "The tube shuts at midnight."

"We could get a taxi," he suggested. "I'd make sure you got home safely."

I shook my head again. "That's really sweet, but I'll be fine on the tube," I said.

"At least let me see you safely on the train then," he persisted.

"OK," I agreed, and we stood up and made our way back through the bar, out onto Kentish Town Road and towards the tube station.

We reached the steps and stopped. "I'll be fine from here," I said.

"If you're sure," he said uncertainly. "I don't like the idea of you getting the train on your own."

"It's only two stops," I said. "And my flat isn't far from the station. I'll be fine."

"OK," he agreed, but I could tell he wasn't completely happy with it, and I found it nice that he was bothered. "Jess, I've had a really great evening," he said, and I fought a smirk as I recognised the end-of-the-night, leading-up-to-a-kiss speech.

"Me too," I smiled.

"I meant what I said - I'd really like to do this again," he said, taking a step closer to me.

"Yeah, I'd like that too," I said, looking up at him. "I just want to take this slow, though. If that's OK with you."

He nodded. "Of course. We can take it as slow as you want."

I smiled. "Thank you. For being understanding."

"No problem."

He smiled.

I smiled.

Had I put him off making a move? I wasn't sure. Would it bother me if he made a move? I wasn't sure about that, either.

"So, I know I just said we would take it slow, but I'd also really like to kiss you, if that would be OK?" he said in a rush, and I laughed at his nervousness.

"OK, you're laughing at me, should I take that as a good thing or a bad thing?" he asked in confusion.

I laughed again. "It would be OK to kiss me," I smiled.

"OK, great," he said, grinning. "So, should I do it now, or...?"

I laughed again, and he laughed too.

"You can do it now," I grinned.

"OK," he chuckled. "Wow. See, now there's all this pressure..."

I laughed and pushed his chest gently and he looked down at me, still grinning.

And then he leaned forward and gently kissed me, and I kissed him back.

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Thank you for 107 votes on the last chapter!! That is just incredible and I am so so happy! Please keep voting for my chapters if you are enjoying them, it helps get the story noticed and I appreciate it so much! Next update will be Saturday.

And if anyone is at the Belfast concert tonight please blow a kiss at Liam from me... I hope he's ok xx