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Lights, Camera, Action!

Princess (Me): Hey everyone! I am your host Princess Silent, though I'm not as quiet as you expect me to–

*Weekend Whip starts playing at an abnormally loud decibel*

Princess: Can– can we turn that down a little, please? I'm trying to–

*Weekend Whip continues loudly with no regard for anyone's hearing*

Princess: *takes out gun and starts air firing* SHUT UP!!!

*Weekend Whip shuts up with an off-key trumpet sound*

Princess: *stays silent, daring the song to start again*

*Silence*

Princess: Anyway, we are going to start our Ninjago behind-the-scenes special with – obviously – introducing the main cast of the show. Ladies and gentlemen, put your little cupholder-like hands together for . . . the Ninja!

*Applause*

The Ninja: *walk in while waving their hands dramatically and acting grateful for the attention*

The Ninja: Thank you! Thanks! You all are the best!

Random person: I love you, Kai!

Kai: *never-ending winks and smirks*

Princess: Please, be seated. *gestures at the six folding chairs*

Cole: I thought we were gonna get some cool Chesterfield sofas to sit on.

Nya: Who do you think we are? Joe Biden's children?

Princess: *forced smile* Sit. Down.

Ninja: *finally deposit their behinds on the chairs*

Princess: Well, everyone! Here we have the *cough* talented cast of Ninjago: Masters Of Spinjitzu's Ninja team. Please, start with your names.

Worker: *whispers* But the people already know who they are.

Princess: SHH!! *continues fake smile*

Lloyd: Good morning, everybody. I–

Random person: It's past noon!

Lloyd: Um . . . okay? Good afternoon, everybody. I'm Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon, the Green Ninja and the leader of the team.

Jay: What up, people! My completely awesome name is Jay Edmund Gordon Walker, the Lightning Ninja and the screwdriver of the team.

Random person: *confused whisper* Screwdriver?!

Kai: Yo!

The ladies: *fangirl screaming with no regard for anyone's hearing*

Kai: Yes! Thank you! You're very kind. The name's Kai Rafael Smith, the Fire Ninja and the hot-shot of the team. *winks*

The ladies: *fangirl screaming*

Random girl: *faints*

Nya: Hello everyone! My name is Nya Erika Smith, the Water Ninja and definitely not just the girl of the team. I'm the technical and crafty one.

Jay: And my girlfriend!

Princess: Uh, hate to be the Jaya spoiler but we need to quickly wrap up the introduction. Continue.

Cole: 'Sup, people. My name's Colvin Louis Brookstone, the Earth Ninja and the muscle of the team.

Lloyd: Your name's Colvin?!

Cole: Um . . . yes . . .

Lloyd: 😕

Zane: A good afternoon to all you lovely people who have come to meet us and greet us with your happy smiles and wonderful nature–

Random person: 😴

Zane: –and I hope we all will turn out to be the best of friends. My good name is Zane Anthony Gabriel Harold Johnathan Julien Roberts the III, the Ice Ninja and the brains of the team.

*Crickets chirping*

Kai: Wha . . . .

Princess: *snoozing but snaps awake* Huh? What? Oh! Uh, thank you! Thank you all so much! Just need you to say a few words to the audience before we leave for your studio.

Cole: Always remember! The fatter you are, the harder it is for people to kidnap you. Eat cake, stay safe! Peace!

Kai: If you want to be like me then take care of your hair and be handsome! *Thumbs up*

Zane: Never wait for the perfect moment, my friends. Rather you should take the moment and make it perfect. If opportunity doesn't–

Jay: "Queue" is just "Q" followed by four silent letters.

Zane: I wasn't done with–

Nya: I really loved coming home to find the boys deciding to award ten bucks to the ninja who would find out who Samurai X was while I smiled to myself. So satisfying.

Zane: But I–

Lloyd: Life is not my favourite. Period.

Princess:  . . . . . . Um, well thank you all for those wonderful words that no one actually gained good advice from. Alright, people! That's a wrap!

*Weekend Whip starts again*

Ninja: *stand up and follow Princess*

Jay: *trips*

Audience: Oooooohhhhhhh!

Zane: As I was saying, if opportunity doesn't knock–

Camera man: *shuts down camera*

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