Saying I Hate You
The lash struck him, and Elrohir struggled against Elrond's grasp as the pain spread across his behind. His teeth bit into Elrond's hand and, as his father yelped and released him, Elrohir stumbled back.
"I hate you!" Elrohir screamed. "You are a cruel liar! You do not love us!"
Elrond's eyes flashed, and he grabbed for Elrohir but Elrohir snarled. "Stay away from me, you monster!"
"Elrohir, you behave yourself," Elrond warned. "Watch your tone and your anger. Now come here."
"No! I am tired of walking to your beatings!"
"You deserve this, Elrohir!" Elrond cried, lunging for his son. "It is not a beating; it is a punishment to teach you to obey me!"
"Lies!" Elrohir cried, fleeing toward the door. As he passed under the archway, Elrond's hand fastened over his arm and dragged him back.
"No!" Elrohir howled.
"Elrohir, if you do not watch it, I will tan your hide off you," Elrond said through gritted teeth as he dragged Elrohir back to the center of the room.
Elrohir choked on his sobs. "You are nothing but a filthy liar and a cursed child abuser! I hate you! You are no father of mine! And I wish Arwen had never been born! You will treat her with the same wickedness, and drive the beauty out of her! I hate you! And naneth!"
Elrond's slap landed on his face, spreading pain. "If you talk about the ones you have loved you, given you food, and a roof over your head, like that again, I will thrash you so hard, you will never cross me again! Do you understand?"
"Let him go, ada," Elladan said, his voice holding steady.
Elrond turned to face him. "You will receive your punishment after I am done with your insolent brother!"
"No, ada," Elladan said. "Let him go. I betrayed Elrohir when said I believed your way of discipline right, the night before you forced him through an exorcism. I will not lie again. I do not believe it is right. I think it is cruel and wrong, and—and I cannot understand how you claim to love us while you dole out this kind of brutal punishment! If you do love us, we stopped feeling it long ago. There are many other ways of discipline, and they do not involve violence."
"I begin to think another exorcism will help you both!" Elrond said, raising the strap as he struggled to hold Elrohir, gripping him tightly around the waist.
Elrohir's eyes went wild. "NO!"
"If you listened to me, you would not put yourself in situation where I have to punish you," Elrond said. "It brings me no joy to have to do this to you for I love you both so much. I hate having to hit you, but I have to, for your own good, so you may grow into good people."
Elrohir's struggling body went limp, and he sobbed, realizing agreement was futile. Elrond believed the great lie, and would continue to do so until death claimed him. His tears dripped to the floor and splashed onto the carpet as Elrond applied the fiery strokes of the strap to his buttocks.
Elladan's hands curled into fists, and he wished he were bigger—stronger—more powerful. His heart tied itself into knots as he watched through blurry eyes his father punish his twin. Elrond turned to him next and left him as sore as Elrohir before he stalked from the room.
Elrohir lay on the floor, his face pressed to the carpet, and sobbed. He choked on his breath as Elrond said from the doorway, "Stop acting like a spoilt baby, Elrohir. You will miss your archery lessons altogether if you lie there much longer."
Elrohir dragged himself to his feet and wiped his nose. He swallowed over the lump in his throat. "Yes, ada. We—we will leave now."
Elladan picked himself up and took Elrohir's hand. He felt Elrohir shaking the entire long walk back to their room. As soon as the door closed, Elrohir tore his hand away from Elladan's and crossed to his chest of drawers. He grabbed handfuls of clothing and stuffed them into a leather bag, shoving his sketchpads and pencils into it.
"What are you doing?" Elladan asked, his voice frightened.
Elrohir turned to look at him. "I am leaving. I-I am going to Mirkwood. I-I cannot go to Lothlorien. Galadriel and Celeborn would send us right back; they are like ada and naneth, and they have spanked us before. I-I will not stay here another day. After what ada did to me, I cannot lie here, and I am done trying."
Tears slid down his cheeks, his heart as broken as his shaking voice. "I-I do not care what ada does to me if he catches me. He can beat me as much as he likes. But if he does catch me, I would plunge a knife into my heart and leave the torture of this life behind then live with him a second longer."
Elladan met Elrohir's eyes. "Well, you will not run away alone. I will not stay here without you. It is hard for me to, Elrohir. After today, I am ready to leave. I do not care where we go as long as it is somewhere safe from ada and naneth."
"Thank you," Elrohir said, tears filling his eyes as he came to bury his face in Elladan's chest.
Elladan packed his bag, digging up the warm, fur lined winter clothes in the bottom draw. He collected his pencils and sketchpad, and sat down to wrap himself in his winter cloak and fur-lined boots, tying up his hair.
"We will sneak down to the stables and take two horses," he said. "We can leave the valley unnoticed in the snowstorm coming." He looked at the grey clouds gathering in the sky.
"I have a map," Elrohir said.
"Why?" Elladan asked, looking up.
"I-I have been thinking about this for a while," Elrohir admitted. "But today's events sealed my decision. I-I keep hoping ada will change and stop hurting us, but he keeps plowing on. We cannot run to Lothlorien, but we can beg Thranduil to help us. I-I do not know how he disciplines, but at least we do not know if he spanks or not. I know naneth's parents do. Thranduil is our only hope, and I miss him."
Elladan picked up his bag and peeked out the door into the empty hallway. "Come on. We have little time. We will wait for the snow to thicken before we leave. We should take some provisions from the larder."
"I am scared," Elrohir whimpered.
Elladan turned to embrace him. "I am to. I am terrified. But . . . I will be here to protect you. It will be easier to shoot a wolf with my bow then it is to drag ada away from you when he has the strap out."
He reached up, and took his bow and quiver off the wall, handing Elrohir his. The twins looked into each other's eyes, firm with resolve, and nodded before they stepped out into the hall, and took the first steps toward freedom.
We are about to embark on the great arc of the story. Elladan and Elrohir have made a final decision and decided to take matters into their own hands. Will they survive their journey to Mirkwood and, if they do, will Thranduil help them?
Thank you for being patient; I know this update came a day late! I love hearing from you.
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