Dedicated to: Mherybeth Acaylar Esatam

Hello, angels, thank you for making it this far! I am a bit emotional writing this chapter. Happy reading! I might post the epilogue on Friday. Medyo mahaba. Huhu. I have recommended music to enjoy reading this chapter. Thank you!

Chapter 75: Night of Waterfalls

I came back.

I might have regained all my strength with Claret's blessing, but my knees buckled the moment I stepped inside the mirror. I collapsed onto my stomach with Astrid's weight behind my back. This time, I buried my face in the dried land of the mirror, shouting and crying out all my frustrations as I continuously hit my fist on it as if that could channel all my emotions.

I thought that was it. I managed to take Astrid outside— I saved her and fulfilled my promise, but in the end, I caused too much pain, not just for Rosh but also for my mate.

Paulit-ulit bumabalik sa alaala ko kung paano magmakaawa sa akin si Rosh, kung paano nagtutulong-tulong ang lahat para pigilan siya, at maging ang paraan ng pagtitig sa akin ni Tobias.

Rosh was begging with his words, but my mate was begging with his eyes. I knew how he longed for me the first time his arms held me when I came out of the mirror—but it was the same arms embracing Rosh, holding his brother with eyes that couldn't fathom to witness his suffering.

I almost lost it when I saw how they forced him to close his eyes . . . just because I had made a terrible mistake.

Unti-unti akong bumangon at hinarap si Astrid. I held her in my arms. I embraced her just like Rosh embraced her. "I am sorry . . ."

My shoulders started to shake as I continuously whispered sorry to her.

As much as I wanted to listen to Rosh and give Astrid to him, I had to do something about my mistake. I didn't know. It was all my fault. I should have known better than to hurt someone who was already suffering. I promised him, but it wasn't my plan to give him this pain— way painful on what he had endured for years.

"I am sorry... buong akala ko ay maaari na kitang ilabas. Buong akala ko ay iyon ang tulong na nais na iparating ng asul na apoy. I got overwhelmed with the fact that for the first time... in my whole life as someone living in the dark, I can help— not just Rosh, but you— the woman in the pictures. You were my only constant in the field of darkness, Astrid, and saving you, bringing you to the place where I could see colors would make my heart light. Gusto kong bumawi sa 'yo— gusto kong tumulong. I wanted you to wake up because you deserve to experience the love waiting for you . . ."

I bit my lower lip, feeling the soreness in my throat as I forced myself to stop my sobs. My tears were wetting Astrid's hair as I buried my face in it.

"B-but I've caused your mate too much pain...I am an idiot! Rosh will hate me, Tobias will hate me, the Le'Vamueivos, Claret will be disappointed, and the princes of the prophecy . . . I failed everyone."

I kept hugging Astrid. I allowed myself to cry and talk to her. Hindi ko alam kung naririnig niya ako o kung nakikita niya ako sa ibang dimensyon, o 'di kaya'y naririnig niya ako sa panaginip, ngunit ang tanging nais ko lang maramdaman niya sa mga oras na ito ay ang mainit na yakap ko.

"Believe me, I don't want to cause anyone trouble. I don't want to cause pain. I just wanted to help."

Iniyak ko nang iniyak ang lahat ng nararamdaman ko hanggang sa makaramdam ako ng pagod. Dahan-dahan kong ibinaba si Astrid sa lupa. Huminga ako nang malalim at ganoon din ang ginawa ko. Ihiniga ko ang sarili ko sa lupa.

When I looked around, the place was the same as I had left it. There were no bright colors, only withered plants and flowers. Everyone was weakly bowing at us, and at any moment one might collapse or turn into dust. There was no wind again, but it was so hot that I felt I was melting.

I shifted to my left side, using my left arm as a pillow, and looked closely at Astrid as I held her hand. Compared to when I first saw her inside this mirror, she looked pale and lifeless, but after her short visit outside and with Rosh's venom inside her body, I saw a glimpse of added colors in her cheeks, lips, and even the shining of her hair.

I wasn't sure about Rosh's way, but I remembered how his nail pricked Astrid's finger as if it directly stung her vein and allowed his venom, or whatever the prince had, to flow through Astrid's veins.

I looked at the finger where Prince Rosh had pricked her, there was a mark on it. Marahan kong hinaplos ang daliri niyang iyon.

"I am sorry . . ." I whispered before I succumbed to sleep.

At the back of my mind, I was hoping that I could get inside her mind. I knew that it was still weak, but us, being connected by fate and prophecy, and with our hands held together before I closed my eyes, wishing for the impossible.

I wanted to talk to her— to meet her and at least tell her how thankful I was for her dedication when she was in the human world. Kung hindi dahil sa kanya, wala na akong emosyong makikita, hindi ko maiisip na may karapatan at kakayahan pa pala akong makakita ng ngiti sa mga labi.

Without Astrid and her dedication to help all those children shelter in the human world, I might have further succumbed to darkness, at malaki ang posibilidad na ngayon ay isa na ako sa utusan nina Atlas at Veda.

"Please . . . bring me to her in any way possible. Please . . ."

Inaakala ko nang magigisingng ako na hawak ang kamay ni Astrid sa kalawakan ng loob ng salamin. But when I opened my eyes, I found myself kneeling in front of a church, my hands were tightly clasped together, and my head was bowing with fresh tears on my cheeks.

I gasped and looked around, and my eyes widened when I saw an unfamiliar woman, but her presence was so vivid that I could recognize her in an instant.

Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko at mas humagulgol ako sa harapan niya. I wiped my tears with my arms alternately as I waited for her to look at me. Her hands were also clasped together, her forehead leaning on it while her elbows were pressing on the backrest of a long chair.

"Blue fire . . ." a small voice escaped my mouth.

The blue fire, with her peculiar persona, a college girl in a uniform with her bangs. She crept a small smile on her lips. "I've made a terrible mistake. H-hindi ko nakuha ang ibig mong sabihin. Inilabas ko si Astrid, sinaktan ko si Rosh... si Tobias at ang lahat ng nasa Deltora."

Hindi siya nagsalita sa halip ay kinabig niya ako at niyakap ako. "You should have stopped me . . . you should have mentioned the whole details, I am dumb—"

"Shh . . ." the blue fire's forefinger stopped my lips from spouting out more words. "How I wish I could help you further, how I wish I was powerful enough to prepare everything . . . but everything I left were glimpses, fragments that I don't want to leave the other women in the dark."

Hindi ako nakapagsalita sa sinabi niya. Dahil maliwanag na paliwanag na iyon. She couldn't give me everything because she properly divided her remaining powers to give us clues and guidance even if she no longer existed in this world.

Tumungo na ako. "I am sorry . . ."

"Don't be."

Pinunasan niya ang mga luha ko. "Claret made a lot of mistakes in the past, but Nemetio Spiran adored and loved her. They will love you the way they loved Claret. You're a great woman, Kezalli. A tough one."

Hindi na ako nagsalita. Tumayo na mula sa pagkakaluhod si Blue Fire at inilahad niya ang kamay sa akin. When I accepted it, that was when I realized that I opened my eyes inside my young body. And just like the Blue Fire, I was wearing a school uniform with a backpack behind my bag.

"W-where am I?"

She smiled at me. "This is her subconscious. This is her world for now. No one is more powerful than her inside her mind and we're her visitors."

Umawang ang bibig ko habang nakatingala sa kanya. "Astrid's—" she nodded.

"Let's go."

With my hand holding the Blue Fire's hand, we left the church together— like regular siblings in their school uniform.

Habang naglalakad kami patungo sa malaking school, hindi ko maiwasang pagmasdan ang asul na apoy. "How can you enter her mind?"

"I am the Blue Fire, the goddesses of the prophecy's minds are also my realm, but you are always powerful inside, I am just a visitor. I have to go with the flow . . ."

When we entered the gate of a huge university, I saw rows of tents filled with different foods, sweets, cute items, and even some entertainment— a school festival!  Something that I failed to enjoy before because I had to attend to my part-time jobs.

The Blue Fire felt comfortable and confident talking with the humans inside this realm, she bought ice cream, cotton candy, corn, and everything that she could feed me.

Sabi ni Claret, her mother, the blue fire, mastered the process of taking someone else's body and living with the same personality. I wonder who this woman outside her was.

Hanggang sa makapasok na kami roon sa malaking building ng school. Everyone was greeting her; she was friendly to everyone as if she was really part of Astrid's creation.

"You can sit there. Eat your food. I have to go somewhere."

"H-hindi ba bawal ako rito?"

She placed me inside a room filled with busy students preparing for somewhat of a play. "It's fine. You're a cute little elementary girl. They will ignore you."

Hindi na ako nagsalita at lumabas na ang asul na apoy. I sat awkwardly on my seat; my table filled with different foods as I watched every student pass by with different props in their hands.

I was licking my finger with the cheese that I had from French fries when a shadow covered my food, I awkwardly looked up and I saw a familiar face of a woman— a younger version, with long brown hair, a slim body inside the same uniform of the Blue Fire.

Natigil sa ere ang pagnganga ko at ang daliri ko na isusubo nang magtama ang mga mata namin ni Astrid. "Kaninong kapatid ito?!"

Everyone stopped with their work and looked at Astrid, her hands were on her waist as she scanned everyone with her eyes. "Hindi ba bawal magdala ng outsider dito? A kid? Baka matamaan siya ng mga props! She might stain our costume! Sino kapatid mo rito?"

Hindi ako makapagsalita at nakatulala lang ako sa kanya. I couldn't believe that the woman in the pictures, the sleeping woman inside the lotus was in front of me, glaring and asking me. Alive. Vividly.

Umiling ako. "I am sorry . . ."

Her eyes widened, suddenly alarmed when I saw how my tears started to fall. "No . . ."

"Astrid, nasa next room na iyong gaganap na prinsipe. Ikaw na ang sumundo."

Nawala saglit ang atensyon sa akin ni Astrid, ngunit bago niya ako iwan sa posisyon ko ay lumingon ulit siya. "Alright, you can stay. Just use this . . ."

Agad siyang may kinuha sa bulsa niya at inabot niya sa akin ang kanyang panyo.

"Astrid, naroon na daw iyong gaganap na prinsipe!"

"Wait! Ako na nga ang susundo! Wait!" sigaw niya.

Akala ko ay iiwan na ako ni Astrid. But she didn't because as she slowly knelt in front of me, just like how Claret knelt in front of me when I was young— suddenly I saw two gentle beautiful faces in a similar view. Because Astrid did the same, she held my dirty hands, took her white handkerchief, and gently wiped the cheese on my little fingers.

I cried and sobbed in front of her. "I am sorry . . . I took you away from your prince."

She looked confused; she tilted her head as she stared at me. "We will be showing a beautiful play today. You see . . . they say they hired a very handsome prince," she playfully told me as if she were talking to a little kid.

"So don't cry . . . you can eat everything you want here. Just don't play around, okay?"

"I took you away from your prince. I am sorry . . ." ulit ko.

Umiling siya bago tumayo. "No. Later I'll show you my prince. Don't cry, little girl." She patted my head before she stood up straight.

When Astrid waved at me as she exited the huge room filled with busy people, I had an urge to follow her, but I waited.

I thought she was not going to come back, but when the sliding door opened again, the sudden light from outside, enveloping two frames of bodies welcomed my eyes. At first, I saw Astrid's uniform and her long legs, but then I noticed her hand holding someone else's hands . . .

Napatayo na ako at nanlalaki ang mga mata ko nang makilala ang hila ni Astrid. It was Prince Rosh, who looked dazed as if he was in a trance while following and staring at the back of Astrid while she was pulling him.

Astrid winked at me and mouthed, "He is my prince," she said as if she was trying to soothe an innocent heart.

"He is really your prince," I whispered.

Ano ang ginagawa ni Prince Rosh dito?

Sa halip na gumalaw ay bumalik ako sa aking upuan.

I decided to stay in that seat, witnessing the little time Astrid and Prince Rosh had in this little world. The Blue fire sat beside me, watching the scene. "This is one of those repeated dreams, Kezalli. Because Astrid even in her dreams is asking questions about him."

"H-he managed to visit her sleep?"

"This has been playing since a long time ago."

Prince Rosh looked so happy and witnessing them here in this little realm felt like invading their shared memories. Tumalon na ako mula sa aking upuan at lumabas na ako sa room na iyon.

I went outside of the building, looked out of the window, and watched how the human world looked in Astrid's eyes. Nagsimula na akong maglakad sa corridor, masaya na ako na saglit ko siyang nakausap. I knew that even if I tried to talk to her with some of my words from reality, she wouldn't understand me.

This is Astrid's little fantasy.

Hinintay ko na muling magpakita sa akin ang asul na apoy, ngunit hindi ko na siya maramdaman pa.

I sighed and continued looking around.

I enjoyed myself as a little child in Astrid's mind with all of these tents that I failed to see when I was still a human. I bought more food and asked for a burger and iced tea when a familiar scent of perfume lingered under my nose, before I knew it, I looked up again, and it was Astrid again, her hand was extended with a huge furry arm with cash. "I'll pay for you too."

Now she was not wearing her uniform but a cute rabbit costume with tons of kids behind her, holding her tail. She was playing a mascot!

That was when I realized that Astrid is really fond of kids. "You were that kid yesterday!"

Namigay siya ng burgers sa lahat ng mga batang nakasunod sa kanya at maging sa akin. "Have you seen my prince yesterday? He is not my prince, he has a girlfriend! That prick! How dare he flirted with me!" tumawa siya sa sinabi niya.

"Let's go!" sabi niya sa mga mata. "Are you going to join us? Nasaan ang kapatid mo?"

I shook my head. Astrid's mind is so pure and genuine. I didn't want to interrupt her little paradise.

"Okay! See you around!"

Nang nagsimula na siyang maglakad, nakasunod na sa kanya ang mga bata at hinabol ko lang siya ng tanaw. Sinabi ko sa sarili ko na manunuod na lang ako nang mapansin ko ang sarili kong tumatakbo hanggang sa maabot ko siya.

I held her free mascot hand and I looked at her. "If I grow up and we meet again, will you smile at me again? Will you forgive me?"

She laughed. "Why do I have this feeling that your brother or sister is terrible? Or have you mistaken me for someone?"

Kahit hirap na hirap si Astrid sa suot niya ay naupo siya sa harapan ko sa kabila. She cupped my little face with her enormous mascot hand.

"Of course!" she smiled. "I can always give you a smile."

"Thank you . . ."

Because you were . . . you gave me those smiles Astrid, and it saved me.

Hindi na ako sumama ulit sa kanya at sa mga bata. Kumaway sa akin si Astrid kasabay ng mga batang nakasunod sa kanya.

I sighed, smiled, and looked at the blue sky. "Should I go now, Blue Fire? Thank you for sharing a glimpse of Astrid's dreams."

***

I woke up, still with my hand tightly holding Astrid's hands with fresh tears on my cheeks.

Pinunasan ko na ang pisngi ko at tinanaw ang kabuuan ng mundong ngayon ay misyon ko. "I should get going then."

It was a mystery how I managed to summon a lotus. Sa Deltora ay tanging si Reyna Raeliana lang ang may kakayahan niyon, si Astrid na hanggang ngayon ay narito sa loob ng salamin at ngayon ay ako. My abilities had been a question for me, many had their theories, from the pixies and even the princes of the prophecy but coming from someone who had been alive earlier than us that confirmed that I had the blood of an ancient fairy.

Atlas and his cunning ways to get involved in every unexpected event— a villain I once refused to accept.

Lumuhod muna ako malapit sa itaas ng ulo ni Astrid, sa kabila ng magkabaliktad naming posisyon ay marahan kong hinagap ang pisngi niya bago ko inilapat ang noo ko sa kanya.

"I'll start now. Wait for me."

Tumayo na ako, tumalikod kay Astrid at hinarap ang kalawakan ng salamin.

I always had doubts about using my green light on my body, I always thought that the best way was to channel it with my weapon and use it for attacks, but as someone who had the blood of an ancient fairy, I knew that there's a part of me— and my power that was more than just infusing it to weapon.

This time, with my head held high, as a woman from the prophecy, with confidence, I allowed my green light to creep inside me, crawling into my veins— showing its glimpse of traces and illuminating it into green lights on my skin.

The blue fire summoned me because she knew that I had the blood that could revive this realm.

"I am a descendant of Mohid Godeo, one of the seven high thrones."

I summoned my wand, threw it like a baton, and allowed it to circulate as it created a slope of curve from my position to the farthest direction of this realm. Before I knew it, my feet were running to the tallest bridge— a path created by my wand as I climbed further— upward— I felt the sudden lightweight of my body as I started to jump in every two to three steps with the wave of my hands, swirl of my fingers, and movement of legs like a ballerina.

With my every movement, the flowers and plants gently welcomed me as they bowed their heads on the floor of the bridge, allowing my feet to touch them— giving them colors, spreading life, and accepting silver dust like how every pixie graced a garden.

When I jumped again in the air, reaching the middle of the slope— like a swan, a ballerina with her straight legs and arms wide open, I felt the sudden burst coming from my chest, it was a sudden surge as if it had been there and waiting for me to call it— accept it.

The green roots crawled near my eyes to my temple, my ears grew like how they should be— like a real faery, and my tears fell when I saw a pair of silverish wings behind my back.  

Before my feet touched the bridge again, I caught a sudden glimpse of memory—A tall, dark, enormous man, half of his body covered in brown fur, with strong hooves as his feet—a satyr. I could see his back as he played a beautiful piece with a harmonica as the wind blew against him.

"Stop it! I don't want to learn it. I just want to hide myself. I am the weakest. I just want to make a realm where I can be alone. I don't want to make friends."

The Satyr stopped playing and he looked over his shoulder. He smiled and slowly walked towards the familiar voice. He patted her head. "You are a talented goddess, Little One."

Tinabig ng maliit na diyosa ang kamay nito. "A fire? A blue fire for cooking? Is that even a talent?"

"Soon! I will learn to create a realm where I can live alone."

The Satyr laughed. "Then allow me to make your realm beautiful because I am your friend."

"You are not my friend. Naaawa ka lang sa akin o tamang sabihin na sinusuhulan mo ako. Goddess Neena—"

The Satyr covered her little mouth. "Just accept my little gift, alright?"

"What if you die? My realm will crumble with your weak power."

He laughed again. "I always have descendants in every generation. Find them and ask for help. Your realm will forever live, Cyanara."

I bit my lower lip when I saw that short conversation between them. I had been destined to be one of the goddesses from the prophecy, not just because I had been chosen but because I was a descendant of one of the seven high thrones. The blood flowing in my veins had a deep connection from the past.

Kahit wala si Mohid sa harapan ko o maging ang asul na apoy, tumango ako sa harapan ko.

"I'll revive this realm— like a real descendant of a Satyr, a woman from the prophecy, a friend, and someone who promised to live again."

I left the bridge and jumped again, my hands weaving their dances, my feet moving with the air, and the shimmers of my wings brought colors as I touched every plant coming— not to attack but waiting to be blessed.

Sa bawat galaw ko, bumabalik ang lahat ng pinagdaanan ko simula sa mundo ng mga tao, sa lolo't lola ko, sa mga panahong nag-iisa ako, nang una kong makita si Freya, at maging ang sunod-sunod na realisasyon.

There was no Dave or even the man living with Eyah, every one of them was nightmares created inside my mind— Freya's way of making my mind weak. I had been living with a witch with a conflicted mind, trying to manipulate me with emotions I thought I had with non-existent individuals.

Naglinaw ang mga alaala ko. How the nurses and doctors were shaking their heads, with that awful look at me as I constantly looked at an empty room and empty bed while touching a glass window. How I heard murmurs and whispers as I cried in front of that transparent window with an empty human body. How the mansion was so dark as I talked to non-existent Dave on an empty seat, imaginary bodyguards around us standing near the closed wooden doors, a faceless man with a golden sitting on the empty seat of the head of the table, and Eyah— Freyah's familiar voice and her filthy face— the only real thing inside that mansion.

It was like I had been living in a haunted doll house, and Freya had been playing me as her doll.

Hinayaan ko ang sarili kong sumayaw habang patuloy akong lumuuha, at sa bawat lapat ng mga paa ko, ikot ng katawan ko at hampas ng mga braso ko, patuloy na sumasabog ang kulay sa paligid.

And then I saw her face again, it was the moment when we were about to kill her. It was when I finally dug my own hands on her as I summoned my green weapon, giving her lethal damage that caused her death.

My tears fell again, remembering how I suffered so much because of her, and I ended it with my own hands.

With all those memories inside my mind, I didn't notice how I reached the end of the bridge, and as I looked over my shoulder, a small smile crept on my lips, as the bridge was now filled with shades of greenest plants and gigantic flowers, with the familiar sound of flowing water. Because right now, I was no longer inside a swamp or a dried land where all I could see was death, but a paradise— a garden with the heart of a Waterfall. Now there was a moonlight— a time where fairies and satyrs played with their music and dances.

And then I saw a familiar red lotus, slowly closing as the waterfalls embraced it and hid it behind.

A fairy, a descendant of a Satyr, one of the seven high thrones, who was known to betray Goddess Eda together with the other high thrones . . . dedicated a dance to a daughter— a daughter of a goddess destined to rule the world.

I flew and brought my knees on the floating leaf near the falling water in front of me, hiding the sleeping body of a goddess. I bowed my head, pressed my palms together, and uttered a silent prayer to all fairies, satyrs, pixies, and ancestors— to Mohid Godeo.

Because I am ending this— the crime, regret, loneliness, and betrayal I knew they wished they never did.

That night of waterfalls . . . all the fairies and satyrs redeemed themselves from the manipulation as their descendant, I, Kezalli Lanoire vowed to serve with my blood the daughter of the Ancient Goddess.