Chapter 14: Woman from the Fire

My hands were intertwined with Dave's as we walked towards a huge black car. The gentle hand of the man in the gold ring was gently resting on my shoulder. I glanced up at him, but the sun was scorching hot, and his voice was muffled as if everything he said were in slow motion, yet I couldn't understand. I was drenched in sweat. I could feel the slickness of it as it glided down from my temple, my breathing was heavy, and my throat was aching.

It was as if I was in a dream— in a desert looking for an oasis.

Now I could see a man who could lead me the way. His tall frame against the sunlight gleamed as if every side of him had steam— giving me that blurred vision of him.

It was that hot summer day when everything was so bright— when I thought I saw an island in the middle of the ocean, found a lighted candle in a room filled with darkness, and experienced rainfall after a year of drought, but little did I know it was the beginning of my endless nightmare.

As I stepped inside the car, my feet filled with dirt, leaving traces of mud on the black car— it made me realize the suffering I had outside the streets.

I sat silently at the edge of the seat. Dave was hesitant, but when I smiled at him, he climbed up the car, moved closer to me, and took my hand again. Ramdam ko ang lamig ng kamay niya dahilan kung bakit pilit kong ipinakita sa kanya na wala akong nararamdamang kaba.

As the car moved and glanced out the window, the tall buildings were in a blur.

Dinala kami ni Dave ng lalaking may gintong singsing sa isang malaking bahay— or they could call it a mansion.

Pinagbuksan pa kami ng pinto ng sasakyan nang bumaba kami roon. Kapwa nakatingala kami ni Dave habang mabagal na naglalakad patungo sa malaking gate, sa likod niyon ay higit na mataas na malaking masyon na kailanman ay hindi ko aakalain na mabibigyan ako ng pagkakataong matakapakan.

It's even bigger than my grandparents' old museum.

"Let's go, Kids," ani ng lalaki.

As a kid who learned so much about the struggles of life— it was easy for me to realize my fate behind those high gates. Maybe I was born stubborn, adventurous— or maybe foolish.

I gulped.

Mula sa mansyon ay unti-unting nagtungo ang tingin sa lalaking may hawak sa mga balikat namin ni Dave. Dahil kanina ay hindi ko siya nakita, ngayon ay pinilit ko ang sarili kong higit matandaan ang kanyang mukha.

At first, he was purely shadows in front of my eyes. Ganoon ang tingin ko sa mga taong nakasasalamuha ko, maliban kay Dave, sa iisang babae na madalas kong nakikitang may litratong napaskil sa bawat ampunan, at sa magandang imahe ng babaeng lumuluha sa tabi ng kama ko noon.

When my grandparents died, I've lost my ability to recognize faces. All I could see were their shadows and forms. Madalas ay boses na lang ang batayan ko, ang kanilang galaw, kasuotan o kaya'y ang kanilang mga kamay. Even the kids at the shelter, the nuns, the different volunteers, and organizations were all faceless in front of my eyes.

Ngunit habang patuloy kaming naglalakad papalapit sa mataas na gate na iyon ay dahan-dahan nang naglilinaw ang mukha ng lalaki sa harapan ko.

I thought he was already old— but he was surprisingly young for his voice and his aged hands as if his face were all fake and artificial.

Ganoon naman siguro talaga ang nagagawa ng pera— people could hide their age through money.

Nang sandaling unti-unti nang nabuksan ang gate ay sinalubong kami ng mga unipormadong lalaki na kapwa nakayuko, at ang tanging nanatiling nakatayo ng tuwid ay isang babae.

She was wearing a dark blue dress, paired with black high heels. Her hands clasped gently across her stomach, and her nails were painted blue. She bent a little, an indication that she has an adoring interest in little kids like us, but when I looked at her, just like how I filtered the human being in my memory, her face was all blurred— like a shadow in a dream, and when I woke up, I couldn't remember at all.

"How are you, Little kids?"

"How about we feed them first?" sabi ng lalaki.

Tumango ang babaeng may mukha at inalalayan na niya kami ni Dave na pumasok doon sa mansyon.

Nawala na ang kaba sa dibdib ko nang dalhin kami sa kusina at makita ang napakaraming pagkain. Saglit kaming nagkatitigan ni Dave bago kami naupo sa harap ng lamesa at sinimulan na naming kumain.

The man and the faceless woman sat across us as they willingly watched us. Naisip ko na baka may lason ang mga pagkain na iyon, ngunit hindi ko rin napigilan ang sarili kong kumain nang marami. Hindi lang pagkain ang ibinigay sa amin ng araw na iyon, maraming damit, magandang tulugan at lahat na kailangan ng mga batang katulad namin.

The man and the faceless woman took care of us without even giving us an explanation. They even gave us private tutors, and they were both surprised and delighted that Dave and I were smart kids.

"How about we enroll Kezalli and Dave in school?"

I might have an idea of this place— but as a kid who felt the comfort of life again, I couldn't help but brush away the thoughts that we might have entered a dungeon and not a castle.

Nakikita kong masaya na si Dave sa pananatili namin sa mansyong iyon, at ako na siyang naging nakatatanda niyang kapatid ay masaya nang makita siyang ganoon.

Nabulag ako sa pansamantalang kaligayahan, hanggang sa umabot ako ng labing-dalawang taong gulang at higit na mamulat sa katotohanan. Dave and I entered a syndicate, and the couple who sheltered us are trying to raise us as one of their trusted pets.

"Dave, we have to leave this place."

Nang sabihin ko iyon, kumunot lang ang noo niya sa akin at tumawa.

"This is not a good place for us, Dave. You have to come with me. I can make a good plan for us to leave this place."

Hahawakan ko na sana siya nang umiwas siya sa akin at kunot na kunot na ang noo niya. "We're already good in this place, Kezalli. Nagagawa natin ang lahat ng gusto natin. Ibinibigay nila ang kailangan natin, nakakakain tayo nang tama, may maganda tayong higaan. Buhay tayo. Hindi ba't ikaw ang nagsama sa akin dito?"

Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya.

"I know! And it was my fault. I was desperate— we needed food, and I felt unsafe in the presence of that policeman that's why I took Vito's offer. Pero hindi puwede ito. Hindi tayo maaaring lumaki sa mundong ito, Dave."

Pinagsisihan ko ang pagtakas ko sa bahay ampunan. It might be lonely there. The nuns were strict, some organizations were not genuine, and everything was about cameras and social media, but it was not this bad and inhumane.

Siguro'y wala pang naririnig si Dave sa usapan nina Vito at Eyah pero malinaw na sa akin ang kanilang transaksyon.

Umiling si Dave. "Hindi ako sasama, Kezalli. You have to stop talking about this. Vito might hear you."

Huminga ako nang malalim. "Kung hindi ka sasama ay iiwan kita rito, Dave."

Hindi siya sumagot sa akin at hinayaan niya akong iwan siya sa kanyang kuwarto.

It was that night as well when I heard Vito and Eyah in their room, the door was slightly open as they both made those familiar sounds. Hindi lang sa kanilang silid madalas kong naririnig ang ingay na iyon sa loob ng mansyon, minsan sa kusina, sala at kung saan-saan na inaakala yata ng dalawa na wala kami ni Dave.

As much as I didn't want to hear those, some information was spilling in their mouth— as if the pleasure of that activity made them weak, leaving them unguarded.

It was when I discovered that they had been hosting an event where human lives were at stake. It's an underground fight with underground organizations taking a bet. Narinig kong malaki na ang kinikita nila roon dahil sa dami ng malalaking sindikato na sumasali.

I even heard my name and Dave's with their idea to train us. Eyah proposed that we could be their next big thing, but Vito insisted that he'd be using more of our talents for his organization's intelligence and communication.

Hindi ko na pinakinggan pa ang sunod nilang pag-uusapan. Buo na ang loob kong lumayas sa mansyong iyon.

***

I tried to convince Dave again, but he refused. Kahit ilang beses ko siyang pilitin ay higit lang siyang nagalit sa akin.

Nagsisi akong ang mga kamay ko mismo ang nagdala sa kanya sa mundong ito at ngayon ay iiwan ko siya.

Nakahanda na akong tumakas ng gabing iyon, ilang araw matapos kong kausapin si Dave at marinig ang usapan nina Vito at Eyah. Dahil pamilyar na ako sa pagdating at pag-alis ng mga tauhan nina Vito at Eyah, hindi naging mahirap sa akin na salisihan ang mga iyon at magawang makatakas. Malakas ang kaba sa dibdib ko sa bawat sasakyang dumadaan sa kalsada habang naglalakad ako. Mas inangat ko ang jacket ko para takpan ang mukha ko at ang inakala kong gabing agad akong mahuhuli ay umabot ng dalawang linggo.

Magsisimula na sana akong maghanap ng trabaho at magsinungaling sa edad ko, nang makapanuod ako ng isang balita sa palengke. Ayon sa balita nagkaroon ng aksidente sa harap ng kilalang eskwelahan at may ilang mga estudyante ang nabangga. Hindi ko na sana papansinin iyon nang marinig ko ang pangalan ni Dave.

"H-hindi . . ."

Hindi na ako nag-aksaya ng oras at agad akong nagtungo sa hospital na sinabi ng balita.

"Saan po ang room ni Dave Villaruel?"

Nang sabihin sa akin ng babae sa information desk ang room number ay nagmadali na ako roon, hindi na ako nakapasok pa dahil tanging bubog lang ang sumalubong sa akin. Dave was already in the hospital bed surrounded by life support equipment.

Tuluyan nang tumulo ang mga luha ko.

"Hello, Kezalli, long time no see." Malambing na bati sa akin ni Eyah na hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko makita ang mukha.

Tumabi rin sa akin si Vito na nakatanaw kay Dave.

"K-kayo ang may kagagawan nito! Akala ninyo ba ay hindi ako magsusumbong sa pulis?"

"You? Sino ang maniniwala sa kilalang bata ng lansangan na patapon at salot ang tingin ng lahat? Not even one of your shelters can back you up. Walang maniniwala sa 'yo. Ibinigay ko na sa 'yo ang lahat. Ikaw pa ang walang utang na loob."

"Honey, I don't think we can still pay for this kid's hospital assistance. Let's allow him to die, he's not yet starting to be profitable— yet he had the guts to enter an accident."

Vito sighed. "What else we can do? Unless a certain someone—"

Humugot ako nang marahas na paghinga. Sabay kong pinunasan ng mga braso ko ang mga luha ko. Ako ang dapat sisihin sa nangyayaring ito. Dapat ay hindi ko isinama si Dave, sana'y hindi na lang ako umalis sa ampunan— o sana'y mas pinilit ko pa siyang tumakas.

He'd not turn like this if it was not my fault.

"S-support him. Gagawin ko ang lahat ng gusto ninyo."

Sabay ngumisi sina Vito at Eyah sa sinabi ko. "You'll have to pay all his bills. I'll do everything you want, but I will not stay with you. You can message me."

"You silly girl. We can make everything easy for you. Shelter, food, education, money . . ."

Umiling ako. "Just pay for his hospital bills."

Matapos ng usapang iyon, hindi na ako nagulat sa mundong iniharap nila sa akin. Vito and Eyah introduced me to the underworld— a place where all humans have no heart and soul.

"This little girl is a natural fighter," ani ni Vito.

My body was thrown on the mat, my mouth could taste blood, and my visions spun, but that didn't stop me, I stood up, took all my strength, and threw a punch at my opponent who was trying to get up. I sat on his chest, arms pinned to his neck, and I couldn't help but whisper. "Please, don't fight back."

"Kill him, Kezalli."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. "No."

"Kill him."

Hindi ko sinunod ang sinabi ni Vito, ngunit nang biglang may ihagis na baril sa Eyah sa lalaking kalaban ko, mabilis akong gumalaw at hinawakan ang kamay niya para pigilan ko.

He was trying to point it at my face. "N-no, please . . ."

Nagmamakaawa ako sa lalaki na huwag niya akong pilitin. I've been trained for years. I had the strength to alter this situation, but the look in his eyes was determined to kill me.

I had to save myself.

As I pulled the trigger, tears fell from my eyes the blood splattered to my face. Eyah and Vito laughed— and for the first time, I saw the face of the woman, she was a beauty, a shadow— and laughter between the fire.

I'd get stronger and I'd kill you with my own hands.