Once again I wish to express my gratitude towards a few people for their help in describing the Bengali wedding traditions. Thank you dear aakashi_s, iam_abose, princesswidlov and ShreyaSandhir for making the time to give me your valuable inputs. Once again, thank you dear aakashi_s and NILA2763 for being my perpetual inspiration! 

"Vidushi, you are not just a sister to me, you are also my friend, well-wisher and confidante. I did not beat you to the wedding altar intentionally, I hope you understand that. As you already know this shaadi was Dadu's idea, he had been anxious about Mom trying to hook me up with girls of her choice and he did not want Sanyukta to be left high and dry. I give you my word that you will have a magnificent wedding unlike mine, with all our family and friends present!" Randhir gave his sister a warm brotherly hug as he promised her a dream wedding. Vidushi was moved by his earnestness. "As long as we are close to each other I don't care about flamboyance, just never distance yourself from me. You are not just a brother but also my guardian and mentor in life." Vidushi's voice cracked and both Randhir and Sanyukta embraced her spontaneously. A wedding often brings on a flood of emotions and this one was no exception.

The bridal couple, Parth and Vidushi soon reached the banqueting venue where they were met with by Nobin da, Shaila ji and Aman. When they congratulated the senior couple expressing their best wishes for their upcoming wedding the sense of relief on the the latter's faces was evident, they had been worried about the youngster's reaction. "We are sorry for having kept all of you in the dark about the civil marriage. You children have always been very supportive, but the circumstances under which the marriage is taking place were awkward. We were not sure how to present the facts to you so we waited until now." Shaila ji explained her stance to them. "After tomorrow you will be as much a part of our family as Sanyukta, welcome aboard!" Randhir told her cheerfully, dispelling any dark clouds.

Just then the caterer announced the commencement of the wedding feast. All arrangements were ready at the venue. Long tables had been joined end to end and people were seated with the assistance of the NGO volunteers. Water tumblers and plates had already been placed. Kancha lanka/green chillis, Gondhoraj Lebu/Bengali lime and a pinch of salt was served in the plate in a trademark Bengali tradition. The menu was generous, considering Nobin da had decided to ensure that the guests, who rarely had the opportunity to partake of a  sumptuous feast could enjoy the experience to their heart's content. Organising a dinner for the NGO guests was Shaila ji's suggestion that Nobin da found agreeable as a traditional wedding must be followed by a banquet and between them they were only eight people, including Shaila ji's maid.

Certain modifications had been advised by the caterer in order to suit local tastes. A wider choice of vegetarian options were included unlike at a typical biye . Hilsa, the most prized fish served at affluent weddings was absent from the menu as most diners were unfamiliar with the extensively bony fish, in fact most meat and fish preparations were boneless to make them easier to deal with and to avoid any mishap. Some dishes were milder considering the young children and older people present in large numbers. As soon as the caterer's staff began serving the various courses of the meal the family took turns to serve a range of sweets to the diners. Discovering dishes they had never tried before, many asked for second helpings to satisfy their taste buds.

The family waited patiently until all the guests and the volunteers had their dinner. The volunteers then organised the meeting line where the guests greeted the bridal couple one by one, receiving in return boxed gifts of clothes, depending on their gender and age. Some elderly guests blessed the bridal couple with the sprinkling of dhaan-durba (grain and trefoil) on their heads, in a token Aashirwad ceremony. Only after the formalities were observed and the guests boarded their buses and were seen off the venue that the family sit down to their own dinner. By then everyone was ravenously hungry and Aman insisted on sitting between Randhir and Sanyukta so she could help him with his food.  The elaborate feast was served to the family who requested for smaller helpings so they could relish the various vegetarian, fish and meat dishes, rounding it off with a bite-size selection of sweets. 

Shaila,  Vidushi, Parth and the maid left the venue before the bridal couple to prepare to welcome the bride.  Meanwhile the caterer's bill was settled by Nobin da, who added a generous tip for the staff in appreciation for their effort. The event had been a great success and went off glitch-free. Soon Nobin da, Aman and the bridal couple were on their way home. No tears had been shed by the bride who could not have been happier at her bidaai. She did miss her loved ones but being part of Randhir's life was more important to her now. When they reached home Randhir and Sanyukta were welcomed with aarti and as per the Bou baran custom the bride was made to step into a mixture of aalta (a red lac based dye) and milk placed in a plate and then imprint the floor with her stained feet. Although it was custom to spend the night in jesting and playing games everyone decided to call it a day because of more rituals to be performed early next morning. Also that was the day for another wedding and the time to bring another bride to the same home. 

** The wedding feast menu and a brief description of the dishes is given below for those who appreciate the traditional Bengali wedding feast. 

Biye barir menu/ Menu for the wedding of Sanyukta and Randhir

Aam pora shorbot- Green mango cooler

Beler pana- Wood apple cooler

Fried vegetables and fritters

Begun bhaja (Fried brinjal)

Aloo jhuri bhaja (Fried straw potatoes)

Phoolkopir bhaja (Fried cauliflower florets)

Mochar chop (Banana blossom croquettes)

Kumro phooler aar Bok phooler bora (Pumpkin flower and Agastya flower fritters)

Non-vegetarian snacks, served with kashundi and mint chutney

Dimer devil (Egg croquettes)

Chingri (shrimp) cutlet

Chitol macher chop (Chitol fish and potato croquettes)

Dhakai chicken kebab

Vegetarian selection

Narkol diye cholar dal- Tempered chickpea lentils topped with fried coconut chips

Enchorer aam kashundi paturi- Tender jackfruit steamed in banana leaf with hot mustard mango relish

Aloo poshto - Potatoes with ground poppy seeds

Kancha kolar kofta- Plantain kofta in rich gravy

Niramish potoler dolma- Pointed gourd stuffed with khoya and nuts, finished in a korma

Chennar dalna- Diced paneer and peas stewed in ghee, gorom moshla and onion gravy

Chine badam diye shaak bhaja—Green amaranth stir-fried with peanuts

Non-vegetarian selection

Bhetki aar Topshe Fry- Crumb fried bekti fillet and batter fried mangofish

Kakra galda chingri paturi-Mustard soaked crabmeat and Indian scampi steamed in banana leaf

Bagda chingri malai kari- Tiger prawns in a mildly spiced coconut milk curry

Biye barir katla machher kalia- Rich katla fish gravy with whole gorom moshla, wedding special

Chitol machher muitha- East Bengal speciality of chitol fish mince and potato dumplings in gravy

Gondhoraj murgi- Chicken in green chillies, Gondhoraj lime and curd gravy

Kosha mangsho- Mutton on the bone cooked with onions, tomatoes and spices

Served along with

Luchi- Deep-fried plain flour bread

Radha bollobhi- Poori stuffed with urad dal

Kulcha

Gobindobhoger bhaat- Steamed Govind Bhog rice

Basanti pulao- Saffron pulao with a hint of sweetness

Tossed salad

Aloo kabli chaat- Tangy potato and chickpea salad

Kacha aamer chaatni- Green mango chutney

Papor bhaja- Fried Papad

Dessert Selection

Chaler attaar payesh- Creamy rice pudding with custard apple

Patishapta - Crepes with coconut jaggery filling

Chenna poda- Baked caramelly paneer from Odisha

Mishti doi- Reduced milk yoghurt sweetened with nolen gur or date palm molasses

Roshogolla- Chittaranjan, Shyam Bazar, Kolkata

Bhim Nag's Monohara Sandesh and Ledi keni- milk based delicacies from the famous Bow Bazaar, Kolkota confectioner

Mishti Paan-Paan or betel leaf filled with condiments and and rose jam