Insecurity...an emotion that from centuries ago has proved it's capability to destroy any amount of happiness...an emotion that has the ability to bring your self worth to nothing more than mere dust... The sense of insecurity can be triggered by anything as small as a small silly incident...but the thoughts and fears gets piled up one above the other making it more and more suffocating by the minute..... Jungkook was in a similar situation now

' One month hyung...' Jungkook exclaimed helplessly 'It's been one month since I started dating Taehyung. Trust me am happy about that..he makes me feel so precious...no doubt about it... but it has also been one month since am jobless!'

' Jungkook..' Namjoon sighed ' I know it's a rough situation but this will get better...I can see that you are holding up-'

' I am holding up now..but I don't know for how long I can do that' Jungkook cut him off

' Kook' Namjoon leaned forward holding his hand 'Jungkook...I might be the elder brother of your boyfriend..but here in this clinic of mine...you are my patient and am your psychologist... You can be open with me...talk to me without any filters..and I assure you it will remain just between us..You need to be open with me so that I can help you'

Jungkook gave a weak smile as he nodded ' It's just.... You know...my life was going well...I was a perfect brother...a perfect employee....had a decent job and was earning well enough to look after my family... Only place where I lacked was in my relationship... Aera had always been an important part of my life...and when Hobi hyung told me how he had always wanted me and Aera to be a thing..and asked for marrying her.. as he would love to see me with her...I agreed...not wanting to disappoint him... Thought that may be someday in future I'll like her back... Even she knew...she told a million times that it's ok to say no..but call me selfish..or idiot...I was scared to see his disappointment... I was so obsessed with the idea of being perfect and so scared of disappointing the people who had always praised me for being perfect that I forgot about my own happiness'

Namjoon nodded encouragingly asking the younger to continue

' Then I met Tae..' A small smile formed on his face for the first time ever since they started today's session 'He literally was like a storm...a storm that turned my world upside down...a storm which I won't mind getting hit by again in any other life even if I was warned... He just came in... showed me how it was fine to be myself...how it feels to love myself...and for the first time in my life..I did something for myself without the fear of disappointments when I chose him over everything else...I knew he'd be beside me...I kne-I was sure that I'll bring him the world if he asked me to but now...now I have nothing'

' I was a stable.. employed man with a pretty decent salary who was the epitome of perfection and now am..I don't know... just a stupid jobless clumsy ass idiot who is messing up everything every second to the level that even his family can't believe that he once used to be so flawless' Jungkook's fiddled with his fingers... anxiety surging through his veins as he thought about everything ' I am messing up a lot hyung...Am insecure now... more than I ever have been and am scared...am scared that one day my Tae would feel ashamed to be with someone like me and leave me... Am scared that my Jin hyung would have to take on multiple jobs again to look after us like he once used to do... Am so scared of everything hyung..I-'

Namjoon stood up from his chair... moving closer to the crying male pulling him into his arms ' Jungkook ah...Am glad that you opened up to me about all these... But I must assure you one thing Kook...Your imperfections are what makes you perfect..more real.. and it's ok to mess up.. it's fine to make mistakes as long as you'd learn from them and better yourself... Loving yourself and making yourself happy is more important than molding your happiness into nothing just so others will like you...you can't ignore your happiness just to satisfy others Kook.. that's not how it works...'

Namjoon softly cupped his cheeks... Jungkook's wide doe eyes now staring at him..tears still littering his cheeks ' Taehyung is not going to leave you even if you ask him to let you go Kook...he will be attached to you like a leach'

Jungkook chuckled softly at that...' I'd gladly live with that leach then...'

' You better' Namjoon smiled ' And about Jin.... You know what you and Yoongi are to him without me telling you...so talk it out with him...your hyung's assurance will be a great help'

Jungkook nodded ' Hyung don't tell Tae about all these'

' It's not my place to tell him anything' Namjoon said 'But I'd advise you to tell him about what's in your mind before those thoughts devour your senses'

Jungkook was in deep thought as he walked towards home when he heard someone calling out to him. He looked around and saw Jimin waving at him from the other side of the road

' Stand there pretty boy.. I'll come that side' Jimin yelled out...the people around them throwing weird glances at the yelling male

Jungkook laughed shaking his head as he stood there for Jimin to cross the road..but his heart stopped all together when he saw a speeding car approaching Jimin who was in the middle of the road... totally frozen in fear looking towards the nearing vehicle

' No no' Jungkook ran in even before his brain could process what was happening... Fear clawed at his chest as he hugged Jimin tightly and yelled loudly with his eyes shut close ' Stop!!'

Jungkook's grip around Jimin tightened as he awaited the pain but nothing came no matter how many seconds he waited... Jimin squirmed under his hold... making him open his eyes and pull back.. looking around only to have his eyes out of his socket...for everything around him stood frozen...

Jungkook opened his mouth...his heart beating wildly in his chest as he looked at time standing literally still...the birds that flew from the trees were now in mid air...the speeding car now still in the middle of the road just some inches away from them... people around them also were no different.. some of them had their hands covering their mouths in shock and some over their eyes not wanting to see the accident happen while some had their hands held out... some frozen in the middle of a yell...

It felt as if even Jungkook breath was stuck in his chest as he gaped at the frozen world until Jimin held his hand dragging him into the sidewalk and the moment they got there everything went back to normal... the birds flying off and the car speeding past them... people getting back to whatever they were doing as if nothing ever happened but Jungkook's mind was still short circuiting

' What just happened!' Jungkook exclaimed... his voice ragged 'Hyung.. what was that...?'

' Thats what I want to ask you?' Jimin asked exasperated 'Why did you run into the middle of the road Kook...I was coming to you right?!'

' I did?' Jungkook blinked

' What do you mean you did?' Jimin looked at him confused ' Jungkook I waved at you and the next moment you started running to me and would have got hit by that car if I hadn't pulled you here'

' Hyung it was you who ran in and I saved yo-' Jungkook stilled.. something clicking in him..he looked at Jimin who genuinely looked confused and concerned

' What's going on with you Jungkook ah?' Jimin asked when he saw Jungkook looking back at the road ' Is everything fine?'

' I don't know...' Jungkook trailed off ' Am tired..I guess'

' Let's call a cab ok?' Jimin asked to which Jungkook slightly nodded

The ride back home was filled with tension... Jungkook was sure as hell that he wasn't imagining things...I saw it all..I saw time stopping... then why was Jimin hyung acting as if nothing ever happened... why was he saying that it was me who ran in towards him?

Jungkook looked at Jimin....the elder's whole demeanor tensed...with a constant frown etched on his forehead... But Jungkook didn't miss his shaking hands and bouncing legs If whatever that he told was the truth..then why is he looking so nervous?

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' You should come in Hyung' Jungkook insisted as they both stood outside Jungkook's home waiting for Yoongi to open the door

' Some other day pretty boy-'

' Jimin' Jin who opened the door smiled wide at the sight of the said boy

' Hey hyung...how are you?' Jimin gave him a small hug

' Am all good...but you guys...none of you even cared to call us once we left' Jin complained ' I thought we all were a family now.... especially Tae'

Jimin gave Jungkook a slight glance ' Tae didn't meet you yet?'

' No...' Jin mumbled ' May be he doesn't like me...'

' No no... hyung that's not the case' Jimin defended ' Yaa Jungkook! He is talking about your boyfriend..tell him what's the reason'

' Umm..hyung...He didn't know if it was appropriate to..you know come here... considering the circumstances under which we started dating' Jungkook mumbled

' But we all were happy for you both' Yoongi walked out ruffling his hair..the action stilling at the sight of Jimin

' I think I should go' Jimin smiled nodding

' Not yet' Jin held on to his hand ' It's already evening...so let's call Tae and Joon for dinner.... let's make everything clear yeah?'

' But hyung...I don't think it's a good idea..I-'

' Stay' Yoongi's voice was heard causing everyone to turn towards him ' Cherry...Stay'

Jimin took in a shaky breath before nodding ' Ok'

' Great then...' Jin clasped his hands ' Kook tell Tae and Namjoon to come over... I'll start preparing the food'

' I'll help you' Jimin said as they all walked in

' No need... just sit here and talk to me' Jin smiled

' Hyung' Jungkook looked at Yoongi whose longing gaze was on a now laughing Jimin

' I missed that smile so much Kook' Yoongi's voice was filled with longing ' I missed him so much'

' Talk it out hyung' Jungkook gave a supportive smile 'Its worth everything'

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'If you are done day dreaming then come help me' Jin smacked Jungkook's head making the younger groan before following him in making Jimin laugh

Yoongi sighed... mustering up whatever courage is left in him as he looked at Jimin

' Jimin ah'

' Yeah?' Jimin asked... trying his best to give a proper smile

' About that day-'

'I know..' Jimin stopped him ' I over reacted that day...and kind of was selfish by just thinking about myself...I should have tried to understand you too... it's fine though...am glad you don't hate me for the way I behaved...' Jimin stood up turning to leave

' I can't hate you' Yoongi breathed out making Jimin look at him' And you were not selfish...if anything it was me who was selfish...I just... Everything has always been a mess from day one for me....and with the way I live I could already picture you leaving me for good Jimin ah..I-' Yoongi took a step closer.. cupping Jimin's cheeks ' One chance...one chance is all I ask for.... I'll prove myself to you...I-'

The loud ringing of the door bell followed by a squealing Jungkook running towards the door made Yoongi step back from Jimin... flashing him a small..weak smile before walking away

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The door flung opened with Jungkook pulling Taehyung into a bone crushing hug seeing which Namjoon broke out into a fit of laughter

' Taehyungie hyungiee' Jungkook pressed his lips over Taehyung's cheek squishing him

' What's happening Koo' Taehyung giggled

' Nothing I just missed you' Jungkook pulled back grinning ' Hi Joonie hyung'

' Finally you noticed me' Namjoon snickered causing Jungkook to just roll his eyes

' Joon... Taehyung' Yoongi walked out ' How are you both? It's been long'

' Yoongs' Namjoon went ahead hugging him ' Am good...tell me about you'

Jungkook and Taehyung watched as Joon and Yoongi left.. talking among themselves about god knows what

' Let's go in?' Taehyung asked

' Wait' Jungkook took hold of Taehyung's shoulder... eyeing him from head to toe 'Something is missing'

' Wha-' Taehyung blinked when Jungkook suddenly kissed him

' This was missing..now it's perfect' Jungkook grinned

' Dork' Taehyung snorted holding on to his hands walking in

' Taeh-'

' Taehyung' Jin came out of the kitchen walking past Jimin as he hugged Taehyung ' How have you been'

Taehyung closed his eyes taking a moment.. leaning more into Jin's arms ' Am fine hyung..how about you'

' Am good... thought you won't come'

' Why?' Taehyung frowned looking at him

' I have been an asshole-'

' It's in the past..you were just being protective of this idiot...so it's fine...I don't hate you or something ok?' Taehyung said with a soft smile ' Also I love that bear you gave me...I even named him!'

' You did??' Jin asked excited 'What?'

' Coco' Jungkook deadpanned with an eye roll 'Who even names a teddy like that?'

' Ofcourse Taehyungie can name his teddy like that...what else will you call a chocolate colored doll!' Jin scoffed

' I-' Jungkook looked flabbergasted ' You know what? I shouldn't have even brought him here!'

' He is such a baby' Jin commented seeing the way Jungkook stomped and left

' You really remember' Taehyung mumbled

' About?' Jin looked at him ' Oh... about Coco?'

Taehyung nodded ' He used to love it'

' I remember Tae...'

' You remember?' Both Taehyung and Jin turned around to see Namjoon looking at them in disbelief

' Joon-'

' Y-you remember?' Namjoon gulped...his voice wavering ' Please tell me you remember me my Izel'

' Mī Kian' Jin's voice broke..his eyes brimming with tears as Namjoon rushed into his embrace....a sob leaving him

' You really remember...Jinnie..I love you....I have been a coward...I always have been...I shouldn't have let you go...' Namjoon sobbed ' Am sorry... about everything... everything that happened to you...Tae-'

' You must hate me for killing him Joon' Jin pulled back ' For killing our Kook'

Taehyung averted his gaze when Namjoon's head snapped towards him...the silent action enough to let Namjoon understand the depth of the situation

' It never was your fault' Namjoon held onto Jin's hand ' You shouldn't blame yourself'

' But I-'

' Listen to me....someone' Jimin who had been silently watching the scene unfold finally spoke up 'I have something to tell you'

But even before Jimin could continue the door bell rang again

' I'll open it' Jin mumbled walking towards the door.. opening only to see someone he least expected

' Aera?'

Taehyung turned at that...a big smile on his face as they both had started becoming very good friends over the months

' Hey?' Jungkook and Yoongi who also came out looked a bit shocked but Jungkook was quick to walk towards her bringing her into a hug

' How are you Jungkookie?'

Taehyung heard her sweet voice...something about Aera's arrival setting his peace on fire

' Let her come in first...Even Tae Jimin and Joon are here...'Yoongi's voice seemed to stop the slowly swirling up thoughts in his head

' Taehyungie is here?' Aera quickly came in ' Tae...how are you?'

' Am...fine' Taehyung gave a tight-lipped smile...
Why am I feeling as if something is about to go wrong?

' It's actually good that you are also here' Aera exclaimed happily ' I wanted to tell you all something-'

'You?'

Jungkook's surprised voice made them all look towards the door.

Taehyung frowned being not able to see whoever it was but he definitely didn't miss the way Namjoon's face fell

' Come on in ' Aera smiled pulling the man inside... seeing whom Taehyung felt his world stop...

' Everyone' Aera began ' Meet my boyfriend...Choi Soobin'

' Hello' Soobin bowed respectfully before looking at everyone present there ' I have heard a lot about all of you from Aera... it's finally nice to meet you all'

Taehyung felt a shudder run down him at the way Soobin's piercing gaze fell on him...his hands shaking in fear as their eyes locked...the deadly glint in his eyes enough to make Taehyung loose his mind

Jimin's hands curling over his wrist had managed to pull Taehyung back to the reality only to have his heart drop seeing the way Soobin and Jungkook hugged...a genuine smile on Jungkook's face as he talked to Soobin about god knows what...but Taehyung was in no state to think rationally

' How do you know him' The coldness in Taehyung's voice made the rest of them frown

' Tae... remember the man whom I bumped into that day...it was him' Jungkook tried his best to smile but the evident fear on Taehyung's face was not helping 'What's wrong baby?'

Taehyung gulped.. his eyes wandering back towards Soobin who still had his gaze fixed on him...' Nothing'

' I think Taehyung shi here didn't like me coming unannounced' Soobin said timidly

' It's nothing like that Soobin shi' Jungkook spoke up as he walked towards Taehyung... wrapping an arm around him ' He is just tired you know..had been a long day for him at work... don't take him wrong'

' Yes Soobinie... Taehyungie is a very fun person to be around' Aera smiled softly...' I just came here to introduce you all to him.... sorry for interrupting'

' Aera.. it's fine...' Jin said ' You are family... and since you came... let's all spend some time together yeah? Also am sure Tae would love to have his new best friend over '

Taehyung saw the way Aera was looking at him..his nerves calming seeing her peaceful face...as a small smile took over his features...over the time he and Aera had developed a beautiful bond..and he was not ready to mess that up just because of this unwelcomed guest

' Ofcourse Aera...I would love to spend time with you.. unless you have some plans with your dear boyfriend' Taehyung teased ' Should I be offended by the fact that you never told me about him?'

' Tae' Aera gasped ' I wanted to surprise you... Come on I'll tell you everything... come with me..you too Jiminie'

' You also come in Soobin shi' Yoongi smiled

' Yeah.. thankyou...' Soobin replied smiling

' Sooo tell me how did you find him??' Taehyung asked trying his best to hide his ugly nagging feeling

' You know I used to go to these yoga classes right... One day on my way back I almost had an accident and Soobin helped me..he took me to the hospital and as a thankyou I took him out for a coffee...and then we started to talk? And he asked me out...so I thought why not try it out...' Aera had a soft smile ' But he is a real good person Tae..Jiminie...I.. really do like him'

' Look at you blushing' Jimin snickered making Aera hide her face behind her hands

' Shut up oppa!!'

Taehyung smiled seeing them both bickering...his mind unknowingly wandering back to those painful memories which he so badly wanted to forget

' I still can't believe that we met again...' Jungkook said amused...all of them now seated around the dinner table' That too like this'

' But look at fate's play Jungkook...we meet again..'

Taehyung's hand stopped midway...his head snapping towards Soobin who had a genuine smile as he looked at Jungkook...May be am just thinking too much- Taehyung's breath hitched when Soobin suddenly averted his gaze towards him...the smile changing into a sinister smirk

' Tae are you fine?' Yoongi's voice made everyone turn towards the said male ' You seem so... lost?'

' Am fine hyung' Taehyung gave a tight lipped smile 'Am just a bit tired...'

' Shall I drop you home?' Jungkook asked

' It's fine Kook' Namjoon answered ' We will be leaving after dinner...I have an appointment early morning..and Tae also has to complete an order before noon...'

' Ah...I see' Jungkook nodded

' Where do you work Taehyung shi?' Soobin asked

' Taehyungie and Jiminie runs a bakery near Hoseokie oppa's company..' Aera replied ' You should try their pastries Soobin.... they are soo yummy!!'

' Look at you increasing our market value' Jimin chirped up ' But we are not giving you anything for free Aera'

' Meanie!!' Aera scoffed making the rest of them laugh

' I didn't know about it' Soobin again started ' I have a soft corner for pastries you see...so Taehyung shi...look forward to seeing me often'

Taehyung didn't like the tone in which Soobin just said that..but the excited smile on Aera's face made him turn a blind eye towards his building up thoughts

' Sure Soobin shi' It was Jimin ' We both will be looking forward for our new customer'

Jungkook couldn't help but become more concerned seeing how pale Taehyung was looking....he hadn't even ate anything properly but before he could voice out his thoughts Taehyung stood up

' The food was very tasty hyung' Taehyung looked at Jin ' But am full'

'You didn't eat anything though' Jin trailed off ' Come with me I'll give you some dessert'

Taehyung nodded following him in while the rest of them fell into some other conversation

' What's wrong Tae?' Jin asked as soon as they stepped into the kitchen ' You look so scared'

'Hyung..Soobin he-'

' That's not who you this he is Tae'

Taehyung turned around to see Namjoon coming in

' But hyung.. he looks like him' Taehyung breathed out

' Yeah..but his name... it's different..he even sound different..the way he speaks..I have been observing him Tae..Soobin is nothing like him' Namjoon explained

' What's kept in a name hyung' Taehyung felt like crying ' None of them remember their surname... somehow they just ended up getting the same name as in their past like..but having a different name doesn't make him different.. hyung am telling you...this is him!'

' Who are you guys talking about?' Jin's puzzled voice grabbed their attention

' Jin hyung...' Taehyung sighed ' You have got only half your memories back....'

' What-'

' Tae we need to talk' Jimin rushed in ' I need to tell this before anyone comes in...And since Jin hyung too remembers everything-'

' He doesn't' Taehyung stopped him ' And I don't want anyone to remember anything anymore ... but I swear on every god I know' He turned towards Namjoon
' If something happens to my Kook this time again because of your ignorance...I won't hesitate to rip you apart!'

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Heyyyy Loveliesssss

How was the chapter... It might be bit of a mess..but brace yourselves for we are starting the journey of Tae and his smeraldo with in the next two chapters

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Take care
Love
Luna