March 13th, 2018.

Warm. Jordan felt so warm and content. He hadn't had a good night of sleep in months. He was still in a daze, not wanting to open his eyes just yet. Basking in the fresh morning air and just how relaxed he felt. It must have been pretty early yet since there wasn't much noise coming from the streets.

He was thankful for a dreamless night. All his dreams lately contained his best friend making him feel good in a way or another. So he was glad for not waking up with a raging boner right next to the man who had caused it.

He had apparently turned to lie on his back during the night, so with his eyes still closed, he went to turn to his side but was stopped by a foreign weight on his tummy. He gasped then, his eyes shooting open to find his sleeping friend's arm thrown across his middle. He looked at Aaron's face then, who was peacefully sleeping next to him. Did this count as cuddling?

He was frozen in place, and he didn't realize his breathing was becoming irregular until Aaron's arm was bringing him close to his chest. "Issokay" He babbled in his sleep. Jordan didn't know if he should feel comforted by it but he was freaking out for real now. He sat up in bed and pushed himself as far away as he could from his friend, waking Aaron up. He was struggling to breathe now, everything becoming a blur around him. He couldn't stop the sob that had built on his throat from being released.

Aaron immediately sat up in front of him, like he had many times before whenever Jordan would have an anxiety attack.

"Buddy, look at me" He softly told Jordan, taking both of the boy's hands on his when he noticed his friend was scratching his arms to ground himself. Jordan's eyes were closed with so much force he was seeing red. He was trying to focus on Aaron's voice who was softly guiding him to follow his breathing pattern. But it was hard for Jordan to focus in Aaron helping him when Aaron himself was the root of his attack.

The older boy took both of Jordan's hands in one of his own and with his now free hand he reached for his friend's cheek. He gently caressed the boy's face while he kept softly guiding him. Aaron could feel Jordan's breath starting to regulate, so he gently pulled the boy to his lap, hiding the boy's head under his chin, kissing the top of the curls.

Being able to finally breathe, Jordan was full on crying now. He felt guilty. He felt so guilty for being in love with his best friend. His oblivious best friend who was now doing exactly what he wanted him to: taking care of him. And that made the guilt duplicate because he felt he was taking advantage of Aaron's good intentions.

"I-I'm s-so s-sorry." He whispered.

"Shhh, it's okay buddy. You're okay, just breathe. You're safe now." Aaron softly calmed him.

And oh, did he felt safe. They remained like this for like five minutes, until Jordan became aware of where he was sitting and what they were wearing.

He tensed, and it seemed like his friend understood because almost as in cue, Aaron gently laid him down on the bed without breaking the hug. If they hadn't been cuddling before, they were definitely cuddling now.

"Go back to sleep buddy, you're okay, I'm not going anywhere." Aaron told him as he started to brush his fingers through the boy's hair.

As guilty as he felt, his anxiety attack had drained him, and before he realized, he was fast asleep again.