It was back in December, around Christmas time, that Jordan decided he needed to talk to somebody. Even though he was trying to distract himself doing some wood working, preparing gifts for his siblings and parents for Christmas, it got to a point where he had had enough. He was so confused as to why he felt that way, but at the same time, it was crystal clear, and that scared him the most. He knew of a person who would not only support him, but also understand him 100%.

December 23rd, 2017

Jordun: Hey bro. ✓✓

Joshua: Hey bubba, waddup? ✓✓

Jordun: you coming over tomorrow, right? I kinda need some advice. ✓✓

Joshua: Yeah buddy, are you okay? you want me to call you? ✓✓

Jordun: Nah it's fine, I'd rather it be in person, don't worry. ✓✓

Joshua: I'm already worried bub. ✓✓

Jordun: don't, srsly, i'm fine. ✓✓

Joshua: As fine as you've been these past few months?... ✓✓

Jordun: haha, yeah I guess. ✓✓

Joshua: I'll be there for breakfast. ✓✓

December 24th

Joshua, Jordan's older brother, was there the next day as he had promised. He brought some buttercream cupcakes he bought on his way to Jordan's, since he knew they were his younger brother's favorites.

Joshua sat on a stool at the kitchen while his brother prepared some coffee. Jordan hadn't say much since his big brother had arrived, and it was evident that the boy was nervous, so Joshua decided to talk first.

"hey, so...how are you?" he softly asked.

Jordan took a deep breath before answering. "I think I'm screwed".

Joshua furrowed his eyebrows. "what? why? I thought this was about Aaron".

Jordan raised his eyebrows in surprise "how... yeah, it is, but... how do you know that?".

Joshua snorted "well buddy, I've known you for 23 years, I think I can tell a thing or two about my brother. Plus, you seem to be even worse since he left the other day". he said giving the boy a sympathetic smile.

Jordan then sighed releasing the air he hadn't realized he was holding. "I guess you know what I'm going to say then" he said, looking at his older brother.

"I had a couple theories, yeah. But since you have come to me, instead of going to Ashley for advice, I think I know which one it is". Joshua replied, putting his hand on Jordan's shoulder and giving a gentle squeeze.

Jordan proceeded to sit on the stool next to his brother, setting both coffees on the counter and his head in his hands, intertwining his fingers with his black curls, whilst his brother pressed soothing circles on his back, not pressuring the boy to talk.

They sat in silence for a while, until Jordan's breath hitched and Joshua heard a soft sob coming from the younger Dun. That was enough for Joshua to press his brother to his chest, hugging him tightly and pressing soft kisses on the boy's black curls. Jordan clung to the eldest, hiding his face on his brother's chest and muffling his whimpers on his pink hoodie.

"I-I d-don't know w-what to do Josh, I'm s-so co-confused". The boy kept sobbing. Joshua tightened his embrace as he ran his fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck.

"shhh it's okay bub, just calm down". Seeing his younger brother like this broke Joshua's heart because he knew what it felt like, he had been there in that same position before. But that was a different story.

They stood there for a while until Jordan's phone rang startling the brothers.

"I c-can't do this now" Jordan said looking at Aaron's name on the screen. The phone kept ringing so Joshua decided to answer the call himself putting it on speaker so Jordan could hear.

"finally bud!".

"hello" said the man.

"... who is this?" questioned Aaron, taken aback by the voice on the other side of the line.

"It's Josh, Aaron."

"ohh, hi Josh, I'm sorry dude, I was expecting to hear Jordo, not you."

Joshua chuckled at the nickname. "it's okay, Jordan is taking a shower, want to leave him a message?".

"oh, uhm yeah, well...nah, not really. I just wanted to talk to him to be honest, just wanted to hear his voice, you know"

"oh..." Joshua replied, looking at his blushing brother with a raised eyebrow.

"yeah, I miss him a lot Josh. And I'm kind of worried too, you know?" said Aaron sighing.

"why's that?" the man asked. Jordan furrowed his brows, Joshua's eyes still on him.

"I don't know if you've noticed but he's been weird lately, like, moody. He barely talks when I call and uhm...dang, he hasn't even called me once in like a month, Josh, it's always me, you know? I'm the one who texts first too. Is he mad at me? d'you know anything?" Aaron sighed, waiting for Joshua to give him an explanation.

He did sound worried, almost desperate, which crushed Jordan's heart. He didn't thought his friend actually cared.

"I don't know Aaron, you don't have any idea why this could be?"

"well..." Aaron trailed. "I uhm, I just know that I miss him a lot, maybe he feels the same? But it's been a few months now, and he's getting worse, Josh, I don't know how to make him talk."

Jordan's cheeks were damp with new tears as he silently cried against the kitchen counter, eyes fixed on the phone. Joshua took the boy's hand in his. "yeah, he probably misses you too man. Hey, you know what, I have an idea"

Jordan's eyes darted to his brother in anticipation for what he had to say.

"Debs and I are renting this big house in LA in like a week, it's pretty close to the beach, wanna come with us? Jordan will be there, maybe you could use that time to talk or just hang out? Like the old times." Joshua saw his brother close his eyes and shake his head but he decided to ignore him.

"that would be great Josh, yeah, that's a great idea." he sounded almost relieved as he continued "Thanks mate, this means a lot. I really care about Jordo, you know? I really love him."

Jordan had to muffle his sobs with his hands so that his friend wouldn't hear.

Joshua hugged his brother tightly as he answered. "yeah buddy, I know you do. Thanks for that. I'll text you later alright?" "alright, thanks again, and tell him I called please. Bye Josh" "will do buddy, bye."

The brothers waited for the call to disconnect and as soon as it did, Jordan questioned Joshua "Why did you invite him, Josh? I thought it was going to be Ash, Abby, Debby and you; a family trip". Jordan wasn't exactly upset, he actually wanted to see Aaron, but he did sound defeated.

"Well, it just came to my mind at that moment that it would be nice to have him around, besides, Aaron is family too, bub. And he is really worried about you, you heard him. Maybe you could use those days to actually talk to him? I think it would be good for you two to share some days at the beach". Joshua reassured his brother, whose tears had stopped by now.

"yeah maybe you're right. at least I have a week to think about it." The man placed a reassuring hand on the boys knee before carefully saying "Did you heard that last part? He does love you too". Jordan couldn't help but sadly smile at that.

"Yeah, as you love me Josh, that's it".

"you don't know that bub, what about that one kiss you told me about?" the older brother softly asked.

"you said it yourself, one kiss. One drunk kiss. I don't think he even remembers that".

"you can't be sure of that until you talk to him." Joshua sighed before continuing. "I guess we Dun brothers have a thing for our best friends, don't we?" he said smiling, causing the younger one to sadly smile back.

"at least you do know Ty loves you back just the same".

Joshua shrugged at that before sighing and replying "But love hasn't been enough for us, bub. We can't be together." He paused, thinking for a moment. "Jordan...whatever you decide to do, just don't make the same mistakes I did, yes? Don't wait until he's married to let him know how you feel, I'll never forgive myself for having done that."

The boy sadly nodded looking at his older brother's watery eyes. "yeah I guess you're right... Just please don't pressure me" Jordan begged his brother, knowing him.

"I'm more here to listen that I'm here to talk, don't worry, bub. Look, come spend the night today at my place and tomorrow morning we go to momma's, deal?" "Deal.".