That's like the most deep title I've put in this book lmao

John POV

I was at my locker when Francis walked over. I glanced around the halls hoping Alex would come over.

"Hey babe" Francis said. I didn't respond-

Now..I know what you're thinking.

"John didn't Francis get killed?"

The answer is no. It was apparently someone who looked like Francis. I guess I should be happy.

Yay.

"Why don't you be my boyfriend again" Francis asked resting his arm on my shoulder
"Ah-what?"
"I promise I won't hit you" he pouted
"I'm c-confused.." I stuttered
"I want you back. I'm really sorry for everything I did" he continued to pout as he ran his fingers through my hair. I wish I would've put it up today.

"What's going on?" Alex asked as he came over
"I c-cant Francis..I'm sorry" I mumbled
"Can't what?" Alex asked. Francis huffed before walking away.
"He wants me to be his boyfriend again..he said he wouldn't hit me" I explained
"What the hell?! Is he aware you're mine? Because you're mine." Alex said protectively
"Yes he knows" I giggled "but he said-"
"What do you mean but? You weren't thinking about it were you?" Alex cut me off
"Well I was just-"
"Seriously?! John what the fuck!" He snapped
"I'm sorry I-" he kept cutting me off
"Make a decision." He said firmly
"Francis" I said without thinking

Alex walked away.

"Alex no! I wasn't thinking!" I started going after him "I didn't mean that!"
"John you love Francis...you always have, he was just too dangerous. If he's going to treat you better....go for it" Alex smiled sadly
"But-...I love you too" I cried
"Me too but you should be with Francis..." he said.

Alex kissed me softly.
"Go get him" he winked
"I'm sorry.." I mumbled
"Don't be. I'll be fine" Alex said
"Thank you" I smiled. I hugged him before going to look for Francis.

"Francis!" I said happily as I went over to him
"What do you want?" He asked rolling his eyes
"I want to be with you" I smiled
"What's wrong? Alex cheat again?" He taunted
"But....you said.." I mumbled
"Geez John take a joke" he laughed. I was confused.

"Cmon Babe" He said grabbing my hand. I followed him unwillingly.

He lead me to the bathroom where he pinned me to the wall and starting kissing me. I pulled away

"Francis I don't want to do anything right now, I have class" I giggled
"Later?"
"Maybe.." by the way maybe means no.
"Great!" Francis lightly kissed my neck
"You really love me?" I asked still unsure
"Of course I do. You're beautiful"
"You think I'm beautiful?!" I asked smiling
"Of course..do you still like makeup?" He asked
"I haven't wore makeup in a long time but yeah if I had any I'd defiantly wear it" I smiled

The bell rang.
"I have class" I said. He kissed me and I kissed back.

I went to class, sitting beside Alex.
"Everything good?" He asked
"Yeah! Francis is gonna get me makeup" I smiled
"I didn't know you liked makeup" he mumbled
"I used to wear it all the time" I explained
"Oh.."
"I can't wait! There's a pink lipstick I really like...I saw it the other day" I continued to gush. Alex was actually happy for me...I love- Francis. I love Francis.

After school Francis took me to get makeup. I paid for most of my own makeup but Francis insisted on paying for something. We went back to his house afterwards.

After about a month he slowly started turning into his old self...slowly..

I went over and sat beside him. He was sitting on his bed on his phone.

"Am I beautiful?" I asked him
"Could be better" he shrugged

I went to the bathroom and put on some makeup then went back to him

"Am I beautiful?" I asked again
"A little better" he said

I went to the bathroom again and left my hair down. I put on a blue dress.

"Am I beautiful?" I asked Francis yet again
"Better" He said setting his phone aside. I sat on his lap and moved my hips in circles.

Frances pinned me to the bed and took off the dress. Francis liked sex. I didn't mind it....when we had sex he called me beautiful and pretty and told me my freckles were like stars..he told me I was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. I loved being called beautiful so whenever Francis wanted sex...I just let him.

Call me a whore and a slut if you want but I never feel beautiful anymore. I have to wear makeup and a dress and have sex with Francis to be beautiful.

I love when he calls me beautiful and tells me he loves me.

"Jacky, you're so beautiful..." he said kissing my stomach. I smiled.
"I love you so much" he told me as he moved to my jaw and started kissing it

We had sex and he kept calling me beautiful and saying he loved me...

Francis had fallen asleep. I was in the bathroom redoing my makeup and hair so I was beautiful for him. I put on a red dress, my hair flowing past my shoulders.

I eyed myself in the mirror. Studied my makeup, hair, and dress. I couldn't help but wonder if I was beautiful enough.

Francis came in a few seconds later.

"Hey" he smiled
"Am I beautiful?" I asked smiling. Francis studied me before answering.
"Hm...I guess" he shrugged. I smiled. 'He thinks I'm beautiful' I thought

He thinks I'm beautiful....

But I don't feel beautiful

He picked my up. I wrapped my legs around his waist smiling.
"Let's go out" He offered
"Ok let me change" I smiled
"What's wrong with your dress? You look beautiful" he said
"The dress is just for you" I smiled
"Just for me huh~?" He asked sliding his hand up my dress
"Yup" I said and kissed his nose. I changed into a white flannel and jeans. I tried my hair back in a ponytail.

"Am I still beautiful?" I ask starting to worry
"Uh Huh" he mumbled not even looking at me. I smiled brightly.

We went out to eat. To the food court. Francis ordered me a salad. He said if I ate healthy I would be beautiful so I couldn't refuse. Alex happened to be there and heard.

"Am I beautiful?" I asked Francis
"Hey!" Alex smiled when he saw me
"Hi" I smiled "hey Alex-" I started to ask about Ellie
"Sorry John I really gotta go, I'm meeting someone. We can talk later, kay? Thanks!" He said before leaving.

Who's he meeting? Why am I so jealous? It's not fair!

"Am I really beautiful?" I asked Francis
"Jesus Christ John will you stop asking. You're beautiful. Is that what you wanted to hear?" He snapped I got up and ran to the bathroom.

I knew I wasn't beautiful. I knew I- ah!

As I started to close the stall door someone pushed it open and went inside the stall with me before locking the door. I couldn't tell who it was. They pinned me to the stall door and kissed me. My eyes widened...until I realized it was Alex. I melted into the kiss.

"I thought you had to meet someone" I said
"I did" he smirked
"I'm supposed to be on a date..." I trailed off
"A date with a guy who makes you wear makeup and eat salads and won't even call you beautiful" Alex argued back
"He calls me beautiful and says he loves me all the time!" I argued back
"When?" Alex dared to ask
"Whenever we...."
"Oh my god" Alex said rolling his eyes "he's using you!"
"He is not!" I argued back
"John when does he call you beautiful or compliment you and try and make you feel better? And when you're doing that doesn't count." Alex said
"W-well-.....he.." I was at a loss for words
"Exactly."
"Shut up! You told me to be with him! I love him and he loves me, I know it!"
"John you're blind."
"No, you're blind." I said storming out of the bathroom.

I went back to Francis.

"You don't think I'm beautiful, do you?" I asked
"Of course I do" he smiled
"You love me?" I asked
"Very much" He said putting a hand on my cheek

I glanced over and saw Alex.

'You're blind.' I thought glaring at him

Frances loves me..

I know he does......

I think he does