Guy in the chair 🦔
« Ned «
» Peter »

Ned

No ❤️

Wait I actually need your help it's really really important

Is it guy in the chair stuff????

No it's more important

Really?

Y e s

Honestly I'm barley holding it together

What?

My life

You better not ne so sleep deprived you forget how to stop sticking to the ceiling.

Because I'm not coming to help again

No it's not that.

Harley and I almost kissed.

WHAT

WHAT

WHAT

WHAT

WHAT

Guy in the chair 🦔 is calling you

📞 Answer

🛑 Decline

I pressed answer and listened as Ned bombarded me with a million questions. Interrupting him, I started quickly telling the story.

"Ok so I realised that Harley hadn't decorated his room yet so I insisted that we go shopping for like furniture and stuff."

"Uh huh"

"And we were like low-key flirting, I put my arms around him to help push the trolly and stuff, then we decided to go onto the top of this massive tree house in the middle of the store and I was like 'its a really nice view' and he was like 'i have a better one' looking right at me. And I was like whaaaaat y'know?"

"Yes"

"And then I got possessed by some kinda smooth pickup line response demon angle and I said 'what are you talking about I have the best view'

"You two are so cute I can't. Wait you said you almost kissed what happened????"

"The guy in the store told us to get out of the tree house because It was 'unsafe' and 'against store guidelines' or something but I think he was just standing in the way of true love for fun"

"Wait when has the L word been in the picture"

"Wait I didn't say I love Harley what are you taking about. Lol"

"Did you just say lol in a verbal conversation??"

"... No?"

"We're no longer friends"

"Noooo I still have loads to tell youuuu"

"Ugh fine only because I'm invested in this story"

"So when we got back it was kinda awkward and he went to the bathroom. Then- remember that Twitter account I made like 3 years ago??"

"Yeah"

"Well I started using it again and I made a friend on there and we talk sometimes. I tweeted about being a disaster bi and we talked about that for a bit. He was a disaster gay and I asked him about his dumbest moment and guess what?"

"I like where this is going"

"He told me the exact same story and what he was currently hiding in the bathroom because it was awkward"

"Wow"

"Wow? I need advice or a plane ticket to Australia not wow"

"Well I mean, it's possible that it's not Harley and the exact same situation is happening at the exact same time to somebody else. But it's probably Harley not gonna lie"

"So what do I do???"

"Tell him that it's your Twitter account, kiss him then get married"

I considered this for a second. "Orrrrr-"

"I do NOT like the sound of this"

"What if I wait a few days, talk to Harley on twitter and find out how big his crush on me is-"

"Peter, no"

"But it's for science Ned"

"You can't lie to him"

"It's not lying it's science"

"Ok then you can't perform secret science experiments on your soon to be boyfriend"

"Not with that attitude you can't"

"Peter-"

"I'm going now because my plan is genius and I don't want to hear any of your negative energy"

"No-"

"Negative vibes are bad for your skin. So byeee"