Chapter 43 - Pressure
I pulled back an arrow, releasing an exhausted but hopefully steadying breath as I aimed, lining it up at a Bokoblin's head. Link was taking care of the Blue Bokoblins on the ground, and I was providing cover for him - or at least, I was trying to.
I was doing my best despite my exhaustion. We'd found ourselves the unlucky victims of an ambush, and the group of monsters had already been taken care of once before that damned Blood Moon rose, granting life back to their deceased forms immediately, and stronger than they once were with magically improved weapons.
Ugh. What a pain.
I released the arrow, nailing the monster right in the eye. The arrowhead embedded itself into the creature's brain and in one fell swoop it erupted into a puff of evil smog and black smoke.
Simultaneously, Link sliced through the chest of the Bokoblin he was facing, and it died, too. Another Bokoblin came up right behind him, spear raised, but because Link's own weapon had broken, he heaved the club up from the monster he'd just killed and swung it with all his might as he turned, sending that creature flying.
As Link rounded on that creature and started to fight it head-on, I noticed a Moblin, sneaking about in the shadows. "Shit," I hissed, rising from my crouch and to my feet. I needed to rejoin the fray but it wasn't that easy.
This is why I hated fighting monsters at night.
Link loved it, and said it gave him a thrill. But the sky was incredibly cloudy, blocking out all moonlight that might have illuminated our battlefield. All we had to go off of was the campfire and a few nearby lanterns. And that was all.
And I hadn't somehow noticed the archer atop its perch - not until it started firing at me.
"Holy-!"
The word barely escaped my mouth as I dodged the projectile aimed my way. I hurried to grab another arrow, drawing it back quickly - but again, I hadn't noticed the Moblin had grabbed the monster Link had been fighting, right out of the shadows, and threw it at me.
The monster came hurtling at me, screeching its panicked little head off, and I scrambled to get out of the way, but stumbled. The monster landed on me, crushing me and sending me to my back on the ground. The wind was knocked out of me, and I wheezed even as I rolled over, steadying myself in a crouch. Adrenaline guided me along as I drew my sword, slicing the head of the monster clean off.
By then... Link had killed the Moblin. The camp was clear. And I stood on shaky feet, sheathing my sword only to double over, fatigued. I set my hands on my knees and sucked in great lungfuls of air. Link didn't stop for anything as he ran to me, but I could hardly stand or address him.
Dammit, that scared me.
My head was spinning, my limbs aching. That fight had been difficult... very difficult. And it ended in a way I never expected but... but it was over. At long last, it was over.
Link slid to a stop right before me, nearly stumbling in his attempt to stop so suddenly. He grabbed me by the arms, hunching over so he could look at my face. "(Y/n)," he said, sounding almost desperate. "(Y/n), hey. Look at me. Are you alright?"
He set one hand beneath my chin, guiding me to lift my head. He brushed some of my hair away from my sweat-slicked face, and I met his gaze, feeling horrible about being the reason he looked so worried, so panicked.
"Link," I said quietly.
"Hey, it's alright, you don't need to speak," he said. "You're alright, you're ok. Can you stand?"
It was funny. He sounded more like he was trying to convince himself that I was alright instead of convincing me. He helped me to stand, and I set my hands on my hips as I took a step back, swaying slightly.
"Holy shit," I breathed out. "Did you see that...?"
"I did," Link said, standing at my side and setting his arm around me, his hand coming to rest against my waist as he held me steady. He peered into my eyes, concern etched into his face. "A Bokoblin got thrown at you. Even for monsters, that seems unnecessarily cruel."
"Yeah, just a bit," I agreed. "Oh, man. Oh, holy shit. That was awful."
"I lost track of what day it was," Link admitted. "I didn't realize it was another Blood Moon tonight. I'm sorry, (Y/n). If I'd remembered, we could've made camp in a more secure spot."
"If it's your fault, it's my fault too, because I also forgot," you admitted.
"Blah, blah," he muttered, not really listening as he turned my head this way and that with his hand set beneath my chin.
"Link...?"
"Are you alright? Any cuts, bruises, anything?"
"It's been about two minutes, so I don't know," I said. "I haven't checked yet."
"Here, let me-"
His hands were on my tunic, intending to lift it to check my abdomen but I stepped away, smoothing it down. "I feel fine, and the worst that'll happen is that I'll bruise," I told him. "I'll check later. For now, can we... can we just... get going?"
"Yeah," he said right away, nodding quickly. "Yeah. Of course, firefly. Let's get going. Lets get... far from here, find someplace safe to rest. Ok?"
"That sounds great," I said, pressing a hand to my stomach. God damn, it hurts.
As we walked to Epona, I looked over at him. "What about you, Link? Did you get hurt at all? I'm sorry, I didn't get much of a chance to watch you, there were so many of them."
"...If I say yes, I did get hurt, would you kiss it and make it feel better?"
I snorted a little with laughter. "Did you actually get hurt?"
"If I say yes again, would you do it?"
I rolled my eyes. "In your dreams," I said to him.
And... perhaps my own.
—
Leaving the waters of Strock Lake far behind us, we continued southwest along the road. We traveled between Nero Hill and Piper Ridge, with the Rayne Highlands and Ancient Columns across the way - which we soon traversed, for something seemed to call Link there.
And that something was another memory.
And I waited patiently for him to emerge from it, like all the others.
—
Zelda was going to continue her research on the shrines, Link knew that.
Zelda most definitely did not want him to follow her, Link knew that.
King Rhoam made it clear that he was most definitely to follow her, Link knew that.
He knew all of that.
So, he went. He trailed her, not expecting her to have hidden her trail so effectively, but she had. By the time he caught up to her, guiding his mare to a stop quickly (making her protest vocally, to which Link assured himself he'd remember to make it up to her with some treats later), Zelda was staring up at the shrine, more likely than not with a racing mind full of ideas and theories and tests she could run.
When she heard his horse, she turned and... well, he hadn't exactly expected her to smile at him, of course, but that was quite a cold reception. Still, duty called - so he leapt off his horse and began jogging to her, his pace quick.
For a moment, Link thought she might come willingly with him back to the castle.
Only, given her nature, that was a stupid thing to expect.
And more than that, she proved him wrong right away.
"I thought I made it clear that I am not in need of an escort," she said, stalking towards him, her eyes narrowed and full of fury. She came to a stop just a few feet before him, and if he wasn't so well-trained to hide his emotions, he'd have looked surprised.
"It seems I'm the only one with a mind of my own," the princess said, looking away from him and setting her hands on her hips. "I, the person in question, am fine, regardless of the king's orders." She looked back at him, her green eyes piercing through him. "Return to the castle," she ordered, walking past him. "And tell that to my father, please."
When she was past him, he waited a moment, stunned - then remembered his training and his orders and began to follow after her.
She was coming back to the castle? That was great!
...after only a few paces, she stopped, huffed, then turned to face him.
"And stop following me!
Well, that kinda went against everything he was trained to do.
—
That memory he seemed to find pretty humorous.
"She was so upset with me," he said in explanation with a chuckle. "I don't know, it was kinda funny. She was pouting and stomping her feet. It was like she wasn't a princess. I don't know. She was human - er, is human. Sometimes I forget that."
"You're human, too," I reminded him. "Come on, let's find a spot to sit and eat. You don't need to go down into that shrine just yet, you must be exhausted."
He smiled and followed after me and soon, we returned to our travels. The road actually shifted, heading east to cross the Tabantha Great Bridge that stretched over the Tanagar Canyon. We soon reached the Tabantha Stable, stayed there for a couple of days to rest, then continued on. Following the road, to our left we saw Mount Rhoam and we progressed through the Hyrule Ridge, heading east.
Later, we found the Seres Scablands, of which I hated the name, the Illumeni Plateau which was named slightly better, and then Washa's Bluff.
"Who named these places," I'd muttered, to which Link laughed.
"I like them," he'd replied, and I'd rolled my eyes.
"Of course you do."
When the road followed the Tamlo River, so did we. When faced with crossroads, we elected to go south. Across the West Hyrule Plains we went, and then the Jeddo Bridge, reaching Nima Plain.
After days of travel more, to our west stood the proud Satori Mountain, and soon... we reached a picturesque, quaint little park, one I thought would be perfect to pause for a day or two in and rest. But Link had a better idea, which included the addition of a memory.
And so you sat, waiting in that pretty little park, Sanidin Park, as I would later learn, as he relived whatever it was that had occurred at this park in his past life.
—
Mount Lanayru stood tall in the distance and here, in her shadow, Link and the princess rode along in a rather companionable silence.
Things had gotten better between them recently.
They were friendly, almost.
"'Be sure to take the time to soothe your mount. That's the only way it will know how you truly feel,'" Zelda recited, patting her stallion's neck. Then she sat up straight, looking at home on that prideful young horse with a coat as white as snow. Zelda looked at him and... and she smiled.
"Your advice was quite helpful," she said. "Thank you. This little one and I are getting along quite well now. At first, I wasn't sure if I should outfit him with all of the royal gear. I thought maybe he should have to earn it first. But it works! He wears it like a true natural."
Zelda looked over at him again.
"I'm trying to be a bit more empathetic," she told him. "Benefit of the doubt, you know?"
As the sun set, they neared Sanidin Park. It was a pretty little place, with a statue of a horse and well-kept grass and flowers, lined with stone. They dismounted there, looking out towards Mount Lanayru.
"See that mountain?" Zelda asked, standing by the scenic railing. "That's Mount Lanayru. It takes its name from the Goddess of Wisdom. Lanayru's decree is very specific," she said. "It says: 'No one is allowed, under the age of seventeen, for only the wise are permitted a place on the mountain.'"
That was funny, almost.
No one under that age was wise? It made sense. It did. Teenagers were stupid.
"I've prayed at the Spring of Courage and at the Spring of Power," Zelda said in reminder, "yet neither awoke anything inside me. But maybe up there... Perhaps the Spring of Wisdom, the final of the three, will be the one."
She paused.
"To be honest, I have no real reason to think that will be the case." She sounded so defeated, so sad. So... resigned. "But there's always the chance that the next moment will change everything. Tomorrow... is my seventeenth birthday." She turned to face him, then, and the look in her eyes was a hard one to place. But she looked so pretty here, silhouetted by the sunset. "So then I shall go and make my way up the mountain."
He nodded surely.
That moment would be the one to change everything.
It would be.
He was sure of it.
—
As I waited, I figured the best way to pass the time would be to apologize to Epona. I knew it couldn't have particularly thrilled her to have two riders atop her back, strong though she was.
"Hello, pretty girl," I said, smiling as I approached her where she grazed. She lifted her head and nickered to me in greeting, and I reached out to her. She pressed her muzzle into my palm, and I used the other hand to stroke her neck lightly. "I'm so sorry I've had to ride you. Seems my horse has gotten stolen." I smiled, scratching her forehead. "Do you miss her, Epona? I miss her. But she's chosen to go somewhere else."
Epona, the sweetheart that she was, nudged me with her nose and I laughed lightly, as though to let me know that it was alright, that she didn't mind.
"As soon as I find a horse even half as good as you, I'll tame and register it, sweet girl," I assured her and she bobbed her head, liking the idea. I reached into one of my packs, taking out one of her favorite treats. I handed it to her, and she ate it gratefully.
After that, I let her go back to grazing, and then I walked to a quieter part of the scenic park. I lowered myself to sit in the grass and I watched as Link still stood in a gaze nearby. I sighed, losing myself soon to a daydream, at least until Link gasped and came back to himself. I let him have a moment to himself and he set his hands on his knees, heaving in breaths of air.
"Dammit," I could hear him say when at last he had the breath, and at long last he stood up straight, cleared his brow with sweat, then turned. As soon as he saw me, he came over, plopping down in the grass beside me. There was something hesitant in his approach, something exhausted and clearly frustrated.
"Link," I said, "are you alright?"
"No, not really," he admitted, and at that, I looked over at him worriedly.
"What do you mean? Bad memory?"
"No," he said, picking at his fingertips. "It was fine. It was kinda cute, actually."
I nodded, then shook my head. "Then what's wrong, Link? You're not still in pain, are you?"
"No, not at all," he said. "It's not an injury." He looked up from his hands, glaring down at the horizon before directing his eyes - though not his anger - at you. His gaze softened, strangely, but he still looked conflicted, even a bit confused. His eyes flickered away unsurely.
I wanted to ask what was wrong, but I didn't want to press. I didn't want to push if he didn't want me to-
"I just hate this whole situation," he finally admitted, his voice quiet but slicing through my thoughts immediately. He bent his knees, leaning forward to wrap his arms around his knees. He dropped his chin right down atop them, huffing a little and making his bangs lift upwards slightly. It was terribly cute, if not for how horribly upset he seemed.
"The situation," I repeated. "You mean... everything."
"Everything," he affirmed with a nod. "Losing the first time, the century-long break, being back and knowing that everyone I've ever known and loved is gone..." He paused, his eyes growing watery. "Worse still is the fact that I'm practically living two separate lives."
He paused for another moment, and it seemed like he wouldn't talk further. But Link was an explainer; he was the type of person who valued talking things through. If he did in fact not want to talk about it at all, I wouldn't press the issue - of course I wouldn't. There are some topics that people can't always talk about. But a gentle prod just might be the push he needed to speak, so I asked: "What do you mean?"
Link took a long, contemplative moment to think. I was beginning to think that he wasn't going to answer at all, and I was about to suggest we have a snack, maybe take a nap - when he answered.
"I live a completely different life than I once did," he said. "Yes, a century has passed. Yes, people change over time anyway. But in my case, I didn't have the gradual change through experience, I woke up not knowing even what my name was. I have no idea who I was before... before it all happened. All I know, and all I can ever learn is through these damn memories." He punched the ground in a frustrated display, fiery tears in his eyes. "I hate this whole thing," he said, his voice a low hiss.
I wanted to reach out. I wanted to take his hand, ease it from the tight fist he balled it into. I wanted to reassure him.
But he still had more to say.
"It's so hard," he continued, "knowing that I had a completely different set of friends back then," he said. "The princess, the other champions, my fellow knights, any regular friends I might have had... And that's not to mention my family. I don't even know my family name to... to look for them, if any of them are still alive. I could meet descendants of my relatives, if I did. But I can't."
I wish I knew what to say. I had words I could say, but I didn't know what would be better for him right now: hearing what he wanted to hear, or hearing what he needed to hear.
Honestly, I had no idea if I even knew either of those options.
"They're all dead," he said quietly, his eyes trained on the horizon. "They're all dead, and I'm alive. I just wish I knew... I don't know."
"I think it's a double-edged sword," I said, considering my words very carefully before speaking them. "Back then, you were a trained knight. You still are, technically, but you were catapulted right through the ranks to become Princess Zelda's private guardsman, right? That's what you told me."
"Yeah," he said, "but what does that matter?"
"You went from a knight to a knight of the highest order with the most precious charge," I explained. "You were never granted time to just... be. I don't know your childhood circumstances but you went from being a child, to training, to training harder, to being the swordsman meant to protect the princess. You didn't exactly have time to figure out who you were without being a knight, without having a title, without having the weight of the kingdom on your shoulders. And I think that was probably really, really difficult."
I paused, taking in a deep breath.
"For the record, I think you did have a loving family and wonderful friends outside of the champions, and I'm sure your personality peeked through. It certainly did when we first met. You were serious and stoic, but you were aloof and a bit goofy, too."
"I... I wasn't goofy," he protested weakly.
"Yes, you were," I countered easily. "At any rate, I know it's difficult, though I know damn well that I'll never know exactly how hard you've had it. But I think..." I take another deep breath in, hoping he wouldn't take these words the wrong way. "I think that if you remembered everything, you'd be a different guy. You'd be Link, but you'd have none of the... joy. Because that's what you are, Link. You're just... this bubbly guy full of joy. I think if you woke up and got bombarded with the memories of your entire life, you wouldn't take the time to look around, to take things slow." I looked at him seriously. "Link, I really believe that if you remembered everything about your past life, you'd have charged right to Ganon's doorstep, prepared or otherwise."
"Would that have really been a bad thing?" He asked, and immediately, he saw the way my face changed and he began to backpedal. "I don't mean... I..." He trailed off, looking down. "I just mean that if I went to Ganon right away, maybe I'd have succeeded. Maybe this could all be over."
"Maybe," I said quietly, still caught in his words.
Would it have been a bad thing for him to go to Ganon right away?
Selfishly, I wanted to say yes. Because him coming to Hateno meant us meeting.
But more than that...
"Ill-prepared, I think Ganon would have killed you," I admitted. "For good."
Link fell silent, then. So did I.
"In all my memories," he said, "I never speak. I think for my first few days out of the Shrine, it was what I reverted to. But it didn't feel natural. And then..." He looked my way, reaching out and gently, so gently, taking my hand in his own. "Then I met you, and something about you kinda brought back that... what'd you say? That I'm a bubbly guy?"
"Something like that," I said, smiling at him, heat rising to my cheeks and ears. "You know, it seems hard to believe that you weren't a talker back then, because you're a talker now."
"Yeah, well, believe it," he said, a smile finally gracing his lips. "I don't ever say anything in my memories."
"Might be worth it for you to do it more often," I say teasingly, making him laugh. "Some of the stuff you prattle on about..."
"If I go back to being a strong but silent hero, how will you ever hear my amazing ideas?"
"Amazing ideas," I echo incredulously, giggling. "Which ones? The ones that usually end up with you getting hurt?"
"...yeah?"
"You're ridiculous, Link," I said with a laugh. "Absolutely ridiculous." I shook my head, gazing over at him fondly. Then I gesture towards Epona with a slight movement of my head. "We should get going soon, no?"
"Mm, what's your rush?" He asked, making a show of lazing back against the grass. He looked so at peace here, and incredibly at home with the picturesque backdrop of the rest of the park behind him. "It's a really nice morning. I think we shouldn't waste it by working. We should actually-"
"-Take a nap," the two of us said together.
"Yeah," I said, conceding right away as Link bit his cheek to hide the extent of his smile. I glanced over at Epona, who was herself lazing about, preparing for a nap. I smiled fondly, shaking my head affectionately at her, then looked to Link. "I figured you two would want a nap right about now."
"And what about you?" Link asked pointedly, and with a smile, and with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "Do you want to take a nap, firefly?"
"It beats just sitting around waiting for you to wake up, so yes," I answer, laying back beside him. "Besides, there's no harm in it. And on such a warm day, too, it'd be a shame to-"
"Stop rationalizing it already," Link said with a delighted laugh. "Just lay down and close your eyes!" His words are a playful sort of authoritative and my smile is an unabashed sort of sheepish and I stretch out in the grass beside him.
"You and your words," Link tutted when his own eyes were closed, a lazy smile on his lips. "Don't you ever get tired of all that thinking?"
"My, aren't you funny," I say quietly, a smile on my own lips as I close my eyes.
I wouldn't realize it because I fell asleep first, but Link stayed up a bit, and when I was quietly snoring away, he remained propped up on his elbow, watching me doze off with a smile. And then he too fell asleep, but only after scooting just a bit, and I mean just a bit, closer.
–
I may have fallen asleep first by accident, but I sure as Hylia woke up first - and totally on purpose.
But something had changed within Link. He'd been in a tumultuous state for the whole nap - and I wouldn't know it happened to even begin to regret not staying awake to help him ease out of it until he awoke too, the evidence of my negligence making itself known.
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