Chapter 07 - Restlessness
The rest of our dinner passed in a relative sort of quiet, one that was peaceful. Actually, that was the most surprising part, really. That comforting silence was one that was hard to achieve artificially, and hard to notice naturally. If it was forced, it wouldn't feel right, and as soon as it gets noticed, it gets harder to get lost in it.
It was also reserved for people that trusted each other. Occasionally, if Leah and I were working together doing our own things in the same space, we'd creep into that sort of calm quiet, but it never would last long before she'd start to hum or have a question or we'd get interrupted. I often experienced it alone, typically when reading and usually on a calm afternoon - with a bonus sense of calm if it was raining.
So, for Link and me to fall into that calm space was unexpected. Not unwanted, but definitely and totally unexpected.
When we were full, I stood and cleared the dishes away. Though he offered to help, I refused to let him, and instead, he idled by one of my bookshelves, rocking rather awkwardly on his feet. His eyes roved about the room, catching on different details. I didn't bother asking about it. Instead, I kept my attention on my task, and when all the dishes were washed, dried, and put away, I turned and headed towards the linen closet.
"Link," I said, looking over my shoulder at him as I crouched down to reach the fresh bed sheets. "Where were you planning on staying tonight?"
"I was just planning on camping outside the village," he said. "Since the innkeeper left this morning, I have nowhere else to go."
"Well," I said, "I've got an extra bed here."
"Do you run a bed and breakfast or something? That's not normal, right? To have an extra bed?"
I chuckled lightly, gathering up a bundle of fresh bedding. "Right," I said. "It's not normal."
"Oh, good," he said. "I didn't think things had changed all that much since I..." He trailed off and cleared his throat. "Anyway, why the extra bed?"
"It's my brother's, technically. But since he travels around most of the time, it's usually bare," I said, and at that, he seemed to perk up.
"He travels?"
"Traveling merchant," I affirmed with a nod, adding pillowcases to the pile. "Who knows, he might have sold you something before. He tends to travel the coastline first, fishing. Then he travels inward, selling his fresh catches."
"Oh, maybe not then," he said. "I don't usually buy seafood."
"Not a fan?"
"No, nothing like that," he said. "Actually, I really like fish. I just don't know how to, you know... cook it."
"I see," I considered. "It's not too difficult."
He looked at me - still curiously, though intently too now - and I could so distinctly feel the weight of his gaze on my profile. "You seem to know a lot about it."
"Yeah, well," I said, "it's kinda hard not to, living this close to the beach. Even the people here that don't like eating it know how to prepare it, anyway."
"Whoa," he said earnestly. "That's cool."
"Mm," I hummed, thinking it over. "I suppose so."
Truthfully, I always figured it was one of those mundane aspects of Hateno I'd never escape. We had all the time in the world to teach each other everything we knew. Everything the elders knew, they passed on. Everything those of my generation learned, we told the kids. It was just how it was.
Even useless knowledge was passed around until everyone can turn it inside out in their brain and recite it forwards and backwards.
Hylia, it was just... Hateno Village. It's how we were. A community so tight-knit, so codependent, so simple...
"At any rate," I continued, getting the conversation back on track, "you can stay here, if you want."
"What? (Y/n), are you sure?"
I stood from my crouch, the bundle of bedding in my arm and turned to face him squarely. "I'm sure," I affirmed. "No one is using it, it's in the other room so you'll have some privacy, and it's better than waiting it out in the woods, right? I can't imagine you can sleep well out in the wild by yourself."
"You get used to it," he commented rather absently, lifting one hand to scratch his cheek. "I don't know if I can accept this, you know."
"Hm? Why not?"
"You already let me have part of your meal," he muttered embarrassedly. "And all I did was kill a couple of monsters."
I nearly dropped the bedding, all of it. Was he serious?
"You say that like it's nothing, Link," I protested. "The least I could do was thank you with a meal for saving Hateno. I still have to thank you for rescuing me, anyway."
"But, you shared some of your meal with me!"
"That's normal!"
Link shook his head vehemently, stepping closer to me. For a brief moment, I was incredibly grateful for the bundle of bedding between us. "Killing monsters is normal for me!"
"So if that's normal for you, and this is normal for me," I said, "then we're even. But you saved my life, Link. I would've died if not for you. I refuse to let that go unpaid."
Link's eyes softened. "You're sure?"
"Of course I am," I assured him. "It may be commonplace for you to go after and kill monsters, but risking my life isn't an everyday thing for me."
"Why did you choose to fight, (Y/n)? Couldn't you have run?"
"Sure, I could've," I replied. "But if they'd seen me, if they'd chased me... or if I just ran and someone else went to the beach, like one of the children... No. There's no way."
"You were prepared to lay your life down for your people," Link stated simply.
"That's right," I said quietly. There was no dancing around that truth, because it was a fact. "You made sure it didn't have to come to that."
A quiet hum passed through Link's lips, contemplative and soft. "Alright," he finally decided. "I'll stay."
"Good, then," I murmured without really thinking, because my gaze was so intently focused on holding his own.
Those eyes, attentive and soft now as they regarded me, or perhaps my kindness, of that crystalline blue that contrasted just so against his fair skin and his blond hair reminiscent of golden sunshine if only we'd been able to see the sun today, which were so interestingly accented by that blue earring of his.
He is strange, I nearly said aloud. Very strange.
—
I am stupid, I nearly said aloud. Very stupid.
This is like, the way that so many people in the horror stories I read get killed. Letting a stranger into their home, being hospitable, assuming them to be trustworthy... But it was different, right?
This wasn't unjustified. This wasn't built on a basis of nothing. Rather, I felt I had very legitimate, strong reasons as to why I could trust him - or I could at least try to. Link had saved me. He'd seen genuinely apologetic about barging in and scaring me. He'd outright refused my offer at first because he hadn't wanted to be a burden - not in eating part of my meal, and assuredly not in staying in the extra room.
I... This may be dumb to say, but I felt I could trust him. He could've very well not saved me yesterday. No matter how used to fighting monsters he says he is, doing something of that skill and strength has to take such a physical toll on the body. I'd only used a club, which was a weapon that did most of the work for me. But with a sword, he had to guide it and he had to make sure his aim was true and he had to utilize the strength required to kill.
Even if I couldn't trust him, and he was a nefarious stranger who could care less about me, he had saved me, and I had to repay that debt. I had to. Or at least... I had to try.
Goddesses help me, maybe I'm going mad. What else could cause such radical changes in me, and all at once? I must have been losing it. Letting a stranger in, inviting him to stay for dinner, and to spend the night, albeit in a different room but under my roof all the same. Wherever my mother was, she was assuredly upset with me, disappointed in my rather lax perception of the rules and regard for my own safety.
Dammit, all this mental back and forth was awful. At the end of the day, it didn't matter, did it? He was here. I'd already done the thing I was second-guessing. By this time tomorrow... the rain will have surely stopped, Link would have been able to finish his tasks at the lab, and he'll be gone.
And that... was that.
Hyrule was big, and in the way of travelers, aside from family members and visiting friends, people don't usually come back.
Those were my thoughts as I readied myself to climb into bed, and they were reflective of the thoughts I had as I got under the covers. I laid there for a moment, letting my thoughts simmer before putting them away. As the peacefulness of the night settled over me like another blanket, Link called out a simple, "good night!"
With a smile, I returned the kind words, and after blowing out the candle set on my nightstand, I rolled over, got comfortable, and got lost in my thoughts until at long last I fell into an easy, dreamless slumber.
—
That morning, I awoke with the call of the rooster. Actually, I might have been awake before it crowed, but it was a drifting sort of consciousness, one that faded in and out indiscriminately. But the rooster's call effectively woke me up and solidified my unfortunate rise from my slumber. Oh, and what pleasant sleep it had been. It'd been a heavy, peaceful sleep, one dreamless and passing in what felt like only a single moment.
I opened my bleary eyes, and blinked the grogginess away. A yawn passed through my lips before I could do much more, and it was so intense a yawn that my eyes squeezed shut and they watered. When I relaxed, I stretched my limbs, from my fingertips all the way down to my toes. The slight ache that accompanied just waking up faded away when I adjusted slightly, and I let my eyes flutter shut once more.
Goodness, but if I don't get up now, I don't think I ever would today, and so I forced my eyes to open and to sit up. With one more big stretch, with my shoulder popping and making all sorts of satisfying sounds as a contented groan escaped me, I figured it was well past time to get my day started.
So that's exactly what I did.
I bathed and got dressed, set my dirty clothes in my hamper, grabbed an apple and made to head towards my door to put my shoes on and head out to feed my animals, but I was struck by the rogue thought that I was forgetting something.
But was I?
I'd made my bed, showered, washed my hair, and had put on underwear and clean socks and work-clothes... Was I forgetting something?
After forcing my shoes onto my feet, I turned, looking over my house. Everything was where it should be. The house was clean, not even a trace of last night's dinner fragrant in the air...
Wait. Dinner. Hadn't I had a guest?
Crossing the space quickly, I opened the door to Pan's room after knocking and waiting for an answer, only to get none. "Link," I called as the door swung open. "Are you... Oh. Guess you left already, huh?"
I took a look around the room. Honestly, if I didn't know any better, if I wasn't of a sound mind, I'd have thought that I imagined Link staying here. Nothing of his had been left behind, the bed was made and loose linens folded neatly by the foot of the bed, and he was gone.
All at once, I was wide awake, and a pang of nervousness struck my heart. He was a traveler who could take care of himself, but I hadn't overslept, right? And judging by the light creeping into the house of early dawn, I hadn't taken too long to get ready.
I suppose he was just an extremely early riser.
Or maybe he hadn't wanted to bump into me this morning?
Oh, I don't know. It could be anything. He was, after all, only a stranger.
Only a stranger...
Hylia. Stop that. As I made to turn and leave the room, I caught sight of something pasted to my wall. It was a piece of paper, but what confused me was not the paper itself, but what pinned the paper to the wall.
"Oh, gross," I said. "What is that...?"
I approached it slowly, as though it might attack, and honestly, it just might do that. I'd never seen one in person before, well alive anyway, but I had certainly seen Chuchu jelly sold in the general store. Sometimes, peddlers would bring their wares from the farthest reaches of Hyrule, and occasionally it would include Chuchus of different colors. The one here was blue, and while I was thankful it didn't seem to be alive, I wasn't thankful that Link had smeared a dead monster glob across my wall to stick a note there.
Oh, well. I suppose there was no way for me not to see it this way. I didn't bother taking the note off the wall. I'd only just gotten clean, I didn't want to risk getting Chuchu jelly all over me. I stepped closer to the note to see it better, then read it.
(Y/n),
Good morning! I'm sorry I left so early, it's just habit from being on my own to wake up before dawn and though this bed is really comfortable, I just couldn't get back to sleep. I wasn't sure where you wanted the bedding, so I folded what I could and left it on the bed. I'm sorry, I just didn't want to wake you!
Oh, and thank you for your hospitality! The meal was great, and being able to sleep inside for a night was really nice. Consider your debts repaid!
I'm not sure if I'll get to see you before I leave, but since it's a nice day out, I can get what Purah wants done and be on my way. I want to thank you in person, but there's a lot of pressure on my shoulders to get started on certain things as soon as possible, so I might not have time to.
If so, I'm sorry! If not, I'll see you then. Hopefully.
Thank you again, (Y/n)!
-Link
Huh. Well, at least he left a note. I sighed and left it be for now.
As I went ahead and got started on my chores, I did what I could to actually leave it be as I wanted, but it was difficult. I couldn't help but feel disappointed, honestly. For as brief and undoubtedly weird as it was, I had enjoyed his company. He'd been someone new to talk to, with different experiences and different views and different everything. It was refreshing to talk with someone like that and-
I sighed. I had other things to focus on.
I tossed feed to my chickens, tended to my garden, and looked out at the water-logged hills of Hateno. This early, it didn't matter that the dew still clung to the blades of grass stubbornly because they were indiscriminate from the rainwater that still hung on dearly, muddying the paths and giving the world a strange sort of glow as the sun started to rise. Pink streaks in the sky chased away the stark gray sky of dawn, and soon, the sun would peek up over the hills, but not now, not yet.
I continued my chores, then headed inside to make myself some breakfast. After breakfast, I cleaned up inside. I dusted the windowsills and all surfaces, cleaned the windows, swept the floor, then settled into the comfortable seat set by one of the windows to sit in a sunbeam and read.
I had half a mind to reread one of my favorite stories, I did. It was an old one, older seemingly than Hyrule itself but because it took place here, I knew that wasn't true. It was of one of the ancient tales of Hyrule's hero - specifically, he who was dubbed the Hero of Time.
According to the story, the hero had the ability to travel through time with the help of a fairy and a special ocarina. All the magic aside, I loved it because the hero had such humble beginnings, yet rose up to forge himself into a hero. He'd had a normal life among the Kokiri children, but learned thta he was destined for greatness. He left the safety of his home and saved all of Hyrule.
Oh, anyway. Because I knew the story like the back of my hand, I decided to try a new one.
A few hours passed in that way, with a blanket stretched across my lap and a book in my hands. I got lost in the story, in the fantastic characters and unbelievable settings woven between the pages and before I knew it, the sun reached its peak in the sky and then began its gradual descent downwards, but before it could get too far, I made myself lunch.
All the while, I couldn't shake this feeling of restlessness, persistent and strong, unyielding and unforgiving. All I made was a sandwich, which didn't take all that long, not by any means - and yet I felt as though it had taken too long. I looked out the window over the sink as I started to eat.
Dammit, I thought. Why do I feel this way...?
As if on cue, my door swung open. I nearly leapt out of my skin, but I somehow managed to keep myself together enough to turn and glare towards the door. Two heart-attacks in less than twenty-four hours was definitely not good for my health.
I had half a mind to chuck the sandwich at the intruder, but I didn't. Instead, I shook my head with disbelief but smiled all the way. "Link," I said, maintaining a faux tone of disappointment. "Do you only visit people when they're eating or making food? Or do you just have excellent timing?"
Link laughed openly, the sound seemingly more foreign to him than it was to me. I was taken aback by that, as his cheeks flushed right away at the sound of his own laughter. He looked confused for a moment, but only for a moment, before clearing his throat.
How odd. He must not laugh often. It sounded weird, as though untrained or out of practice. But everyone laughs, right?
"I just happen to have a really good sense of smell," Link said in response to my teasing.
"Right," I said, playing along. I didn't even have it in me at the moment to comment on the fact that he hadn't knocked on my door once again. Though, it was possible that this time, he did so for the sake of his amusement. "So, why are you here this time, really?"
"Oh," he said, as though he really had needed to be reminded of why he came here. "I finished up what I needed to at the lab, so I'll be leaving now."
I nearly choked on my food. I forced the bite of the sandwich down and then outright balked at him. "What?"
"Hm? Is something the matter?"
"No," I said right away, composing myself. Why had I reacted in such a way? He was an adventurer through and through; Hateno was never his final destination. He was... always meant to leave. He was here for one task, and he'd done it, and now he - like everyone else - was going to leave.
"(Y/n)?"
"No," I repeated. "Everything's fine. I just didn't hear you."
He didn't catch onto my lie, it seemed. "Oh, sorry. I'll be leaving soon. Did you see my note?"
"I did," I answered.
"Oh, good! Well, I'm here to thank you in person!"
Well, with a brilliant smile, he did just that. And then, before I knew it... he turned on his heel, called a goodbye over his shoulder, then left. I watched him go from the doorway of my home as he mounted that stunning steed from before. With a nicker the horse greeted him, and without hardly a moment to waste, he kicked into the horse's sides and then they were off at a trot.
I watched them go.
No, wait.
This doesn't feel right.
Though my brain kept in mind my chores, my duties and my responsibilities... my heart screamed at me to go after him, to chase after the brief adventure he provided.
That man had saved me - and now he was leaving. And I'd thanked him with, what? A meal? No, this was wrong. It wasn't enough. I can't... I can't...
They were out of sight before I knew it, and that was what spurred me into action. "Hylia, you better not have sent me the wrong sign," I muttered as I dashed through my house, gathering the tunic and all belts and pouches that I'd been gifted.
I must have been given that for a reason. Senna noting my restlessness was no coincidence. Leah noticing was no coincidence, either. If she who knew me better than I knew myself, I would leave... then so be it. I would take it upon myself to do so.
It would be dangerous, yes. And I didn't know what I was about to do, nor how I would do it...
But this world - Hyrule herself - was meant to be seen. I'd never left this village, but I didn't want to take this life I'd been given for granted. Staying here would do just that.
Here alone, I got to experience beautiful sunsets, and at the beach they were so grand. But to imagine that same sunset over a snowy tundra, or not at the top of a hill but at the top of a mountain, or over the desert, finally bringing about the cool reprieve of night?
All I could do was imagine it.
I'd spent my whole life imagining it.
But I didn't want to do that anymore. I wanted... I wanted to see it.
Oh, yes. Something inside me stirred as I forced my feet into leather boots. I readjusted the ties about my chest, and though I expected my fingers to falter as I realized the inherent danger of what I was about to embark on, they remained true; and perhaps it was because I realized the far graver fate waiting for me here: living a boring life until the day I die, without having ever left the village in which I was born.
I can no longer sit idly by as my life moves on without me.
I refuse, just as I refuse to let Link think our debts were clear.
My conviction was set. Satisfied in that, I scribbled out a quick note for Leah, pinned it to my door, then shut it resolutely before me. Then I turned on my heel, and, without looking back even once, began to run down the hill, hoping to catch that fair stranger before he could leave the village.
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