(The episode begins in a small desert town. The camera cuts into the town as we see a Ponyta tied up beside a building. Next to the building, McCree (Overwatch) sits on a barrel and takes a drink out of a bottle. The Traveler (Journey) walks past him. Ponyta winnies as it passes by. We cut to the entrance of the town as a figure approaches it. The camera cuts to the front of the person as we see that it is Lara Croft.)

Lara: Finally. (Lara enters the town and walks past some of the inhabitants. She looks over at a building as a few drunken men file out of it. She decides to go inside. We cut to Lara walking into the bar as she quickly finds a table. We cut to a different table at the bar with Wario sitting at it. He's tapping his fingers on the table before he decides to use his opposite hand to pick his nose. He then pulls it out and wipes it underneath the table.)

Wario: Heheh. (We cut back to Lara about to take a drink before the door to the bar suddenly flies open. Sabreman (Sabreman) runs into the bar flailing his arms around.)

Sabreman: Oh! It's terrible! It's awful!

Lara: (Getting up from the table.) What is? (A circle of people begin to form around Sabreman.)

Sabreman: My crew! They're all gone! All of them succumbed to that terrible pyramid!

Lara: What pyramid? (A man beside Lara turns to her.)

Man: There's a pyramid around here that's supposedly haunted.

Sabreman: It is haunted! There are terrible things in there! To think that their lives were lost just to find some treasure... (At the sound of the word "treasure", we cut to Wario as he suddenly looks over at Sabreman. He quickly gets up and shoves people out of the way to speak to him.)

Wario: Did you just say that there's treasure in this pyramid?

Sabreman: Supposedly, there's a great treasure pile in this pyramid. (Wario's eyes turn into dollar signs as he gives a big gaping smile.) But you shouldn't go there, nobody should go there!

Wario: Whatever, buddy. I'm-a gonna find this treasure. Wah ha ha! (Wario shoulders past Sabreman and exits the bar.)

Lara: I'm going to.

Sabreman: Please don't follow after that fool.

Lara: I'm going to figure out the mystery of this pyramid. I promise you that. (With that, Lara also exits the bar. As she walks out the door, Wario flies by her on his motorcycle.)

Wario: You snooze, you lose! Wah ha ha! (He rides off into the desert.)

Lara: Oh, hell. (Lara runs after Wario.)

(We cut to a different part of the desert as John Marston, Dillon, and Kirby walk through. There is cacti around them.)

Dillon: How much longer can we keep going?

John: As long as we can. That giant said nothin' about where we'd find this Master Mind fellow.

Dillon: So we just have to keep wandering?

John: Yep. (Kirby lets out a sigh. A revving sound is heard behind them as they turn around.) What in the-?

Dillon: Look out! (John lunges away as Dillon grabs Kirby and also dives out of the way. Wario's bike cannons past them while spraying sand everywhere.)

John: (Getting up.) What was that thing? (Dillon and Kirby also get up.)

Kirby: Poyo! (The cacti suddenly begin shaking.) Poyo?

Dillon: What's happening? (Suddenly, four cactuars (Final Fantasy) show themselves in the cacti in their typical pose and surround our heroes. John takes out his pistol and shoots at one, but it dodges every bullet. We then see Dillon rev up and start spinning towards another cactuar. It also dodges out of the way as Dillon flies far past.) Wagh! (We cut to see Lara running through the desert. She hears John's gunshots.)

Lara: Something's happening. (She looks over to see our heroes fighting the cactuars.) Cacti? (We cut back to the fight as a cactuar shoots needles at John and Kirby, which all hit. Suddenly, the cactuar that shot at them is blown to bits by a shotgun. The camera pans to see Lara holding one.) Got one! (Kirby looks over at one of the normal cacti and notices a pink flower on it. He sucks it up.)

John: Woah! (Kirby transforms into Leaf Kirby. He begins summoning a leaf tornado.)

Lara: What is that?! (The leaf tornado sucks up a cactuar and shoots it out far away. The leaf tornado stops.)

Kirby: Yah! (The other two cactuar look on in disbelief. Dillon jumps up to one and scratches it with his claws, but the cactuar shoots a wide spray of needles which hit everyone back and turns Kirby back to normal. We cut back to John as the scene suddenly takes on an orange hue and time slows down. John points his gun at the two cactuars as red X's appear over them. Time then goes back to normal as John shoots a shot at each one, killing them both.)

John: Sons of b*tches are finally dead. (To Lara.) Thanks.

Lara: Have you seen a motorcycle go through here?

John: A what?

Dillon: Yeah, we did.

Lara: Oh God, he's in trouble. (Kirby tilts his head up at her.)

John: What's the problem, missy?

Lara: First, don't call me that. Second, he's heading towards a supposedly cursed pyramid. A large group of people died there earlier today. I'm going after him to save his life and figure out the pyramid's secret.

Dillon: We'll come with you to help.

Kirby: Poyo!

Lara: You really don't have to. It's dangerous.

Dillon: We insist. Let's go! (Lara shrugs before leading the way towards the pyramid.)

(We cut to the outside of the pyramid. We see a man at the entrance. The camera pans up to reveal that the man is Marlow Briggs holding Kukulkan's Fangs in his hand. Floating next to him is the Mask of Death.)

Marlow: What the h*ll is this place?

Mask: It's a pyramid. Haven't you seen one of those before?

Marlow: Obviously I know what a pyramid is. I was just talking to myself.

Mask: There is something powerful inside this pyramid. I can feel it. As my champion, you need to enter this pyramid and find this powerful... thing inside of it.

Marlow: I'll trust you on this one. (We see Marlow enter the pyramid, but as soon as he does, Wario pulls up on his motorcycle not far away from the pyramid.)

Wario: Finally! Gold, riches, wealth, it will be all-a mine very very shortly. (Wario runs into the pyramid. We cut back to Marlow in the main chamber room of the pyramid. Sarcophaguses line the walls and there is an exit on the far side of the room.)

Marlow: Lot of coffins on these walls. Nothing too extraordinary yet. (At this, Wario runs down to the chamber room and shoulders Marlow out of the way.)

Wario: Scuse me.

Marlow: Hey, what're you doing down here?

Wario: Looking for the treasure. Isn't it obvious? And put on a shirt, all the ladies love-a Wario anyway.

Marlow: Wario?

Mask: It's just some mortal looking for achievement. Don't pay attention to him.

Wario: (Approaching Marlow. Angry.) What was that, buddy?

Marlow: Calm down, man. Tep is just poking fun.

Wario: You want fun? Wario show you fun! (Wario jumps back, pulls out a bob-omb, and chucks it at Marlow. It explodes and he goes flying back.) Wah ha ha ha!

Marlow: Oh, h*ll no. Now there's gonna be blood. (Marlow runs up to Wario and his scythe turns yellow. He slashes twice at Wario with the front end of the blade before turning it around and blowing him back with a strike from the other end. Wario lands on his back.)

Wario: Ouch.

Mask: Your opponent is weak. This will be easy. (Wario jumps onto his feet and opens his mouth wide. He begins to suck Marlow towards him.)

Marlow: Oh, sh*t! (Marlow is sucked towards Wario. Once he is close enough, Wario grabs a hold of Marlow and suplexes him.) Augh! D*mn. (Wario runs towards Marlow again, but Marlow uses his scythe to strike Wario's stomach and send him flying into a sarcophagus on the wall.)

Wario: Ugh... (The sarcophaguses begin shaking.) Uh? (Marlow gets up and looks around as the sarcophaguses shake. Suddenly, the lid of one flies off as a gibdo (The Legend of Zelda) walks out into the room.)

Marlow: A mummy? (More lids fly off as a large group of gibdos walk out into the room. They approach Marlow. He hits one on his right with a scythe uppercut before turning to his left to stab one in the chest. A group of three come up behind him and start pulling him down.) Agh! Help!

Wario: You're on your own, buddy. (He begins to run towards the exit.) Actually... (Wario runs up and grabs the Mask of Death.)

Mask: Get your grubby hands off of me! The Gods will not forgive you for this!

Wario: Sorry, but you look like you're worth a ton of coins. Hehe. (Wario runs out of the main chamber.)

(We cut back to outside the pyramid as our heroes from before are walking towards it. Lara then notices something and points.)

Lara: That's the motorcycle. He must have gone inside already.

Marlow: (From inside the pyramid.) Help! Somebody! There's too many!

Dillon: Sounds like trouble. (We cut back to inside the pyramid as the gibdos continue to drag Marlow down. Footsteps are then heard.)

John: Let's go! (A load of gunshots are heard as the gibdos begin to fall. Marlow is able to get back up. The camera pans to see John and Lara shooting in different directions. The camera pans to another part of the chamber as Dillon mows down Gibdos. Kirby inhales one before spitting it back out as a star. Our heroes approach Marlow.) You okay, partner?

Marlow: No, something f*cked up is going on here. Some short guy in overalls walked in here, started a fight, and stole something very important.

Lara: That's the man who said he was going to find the treasure here.

Marlow: Well, I'm gonna go stop him.

Lara: We're coming too.

Marlow: Okay. Your funeral. (Marlow runs towards the chamber exit as the rest of our heroes follow. We cut to Wario carrying the Mask of Death in a long hallway.)

Mask: Let go of me! I am King Tepechalic IX, and you will dearly pay for this.

Wario: You talk too much. Eh? (Wario stops and the camera pans to see that the next doorway is covered in stones.) Blocked? Whatever. (Wario pulls out another bob-omb.) Fire! (Wario throws the bob-omb at the brick wall. It explodes and leaves the doorway open for Wario.) Perfect! (The camera cuts down to Wario's feet. We see a small tripwire in front of him, but Wario unknowingly jumps over it towards the doorway. He walks through the door when the pyramid begins to shake.) What now? (Rocks begin falling from the ceiling before a large boulder falls and blocks the doorway that Wario just went through.)

Mask: You've blocked the exit.

Wario: Not my problem. (Wario continues walking. We cut to our heroes walking down the same hallway Wario was.)

Marlow: That little man is in a whole lotta trouble.

Lara: He probably doesn't know what he's doing. He's blinded by greed.

Kirby: Poyo.

Marlow: And what the h*ll is that pink thing?

Dillon: He says his name is Kirby.

Kirby: Kirby!

Marlow: (Stopping.) Woah, hold on. (Everyone stops.) There's a boulder up ahead. It's blocking the way.

John: We can move it. C'mon. (We cut down to their feet as we see the tripwire once again. Marlow and John step right over it, but then Kirby begins following and accidentally sets it off and falls onto his face.)

Kirby: Wagh!

Lara: Oh no!

John: What?

Lara: This Kirby thing set off a tripwire!

Marlow: Oh f*ck! (The camera cuts to the ceiling as a row of spears sticks out from them. The ceiling slowly starts coming down.)

John: Quick, help me move the boulder! (John and Marlow both push on the boulder with all of their might. Lara and Dillon soon join them.)

Dillon: It's no use! It won't budge! (Kirby suddenly jumps over and joins them with his back away from the door. He looks determined.)

Marlow: What is it doing now? (Kirby suddenly starts inhaling with all his strength.)

John: He's inhaling again. (We cut to the ceiling as the spears slowly begin bending. They then begin tearing off the wall and going into Kirby's mouth. Kirby doesn't stop until all of the spears are eaten. He then transforms into Spear Kirby.)

Kirby: Yah! (The ceiling continues to lower as Kirby begins to quickly spin his spear around. Soon, it is just a blur as he uses it to cut the boulder in half vertically.)

Marlow: That's impressive. (Lara runs up and pushes one half of the boulder out of the way.)

Lara: Come on! (They all go through the doorway.) That was too close.

Marlow: You can say that again. (We cut back to Wario and the Mask as they approach a new room. As soon as Wario enters, his eyes turn into dollar signs.)

Wario: Wow! (The camera pans out to reveal that the room is full of gold and gems, as well as a lava pool near the center.) I'm rich! I'm rich! Yahoo! (Wario dives into a pile of gold.)

???: What brings you to my lair?

Wario: Wah? (Wario looks up to reveal Set (Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy) looking down at him.)

Set: I have killed all those who came here before. Why shouldn't I kill you?

Wario: Wah!

Mask: Look where your greed has gotten you.

Wario: (Angry.) Urgh! (Suddenly gets an idea.) I have-a brought you this mask that won't shut up.

Set: A mask?

Wario: He's actually a king, or so he says. King Tepdopulous or something like that. Yeah.

Set: Very well. I shall accept your offer.

Marlow Hold on!

Wario: What?! (The camera pans to see our heroes have just entered the treasure room.)

Marlow: You are not giving away Tep. You are in for an *ss beating. (The camera goes back to Wario and Set.)

Set: Get rid of these thugs. Understood?

Wario: Completely. Time for some fun! (He gives the Mask of Death to Set before approaching the others. He shoulder bashes into the group and takes Kirby and Lara with him.)

Marlow: I'm going after the big guy. (Malow, along with John and Dillon, run towards Set. We cut to Wario shaking Kirby around like a bag.)

Kirby: Wah!

Wario: Have a rotten day! (Wario throws Kirby at a wall which causes him to lose his spear ability. Wario turns to Lara who has two handguns pointed at him.)

Lara: Don't make us do this.

Wario: Wario time! (Wario shoulder bashes Lara who falls back. We cut to John, Dillon, and Marlow approaching Set.)

Set: You are all fools for trying to fight me. (Set throws the Mask of Death into the treasure pile.)

Mask: Hey! (Set then jumps into the lava and grows into his true form. He blasts a plume of fire at our heroes, but they jump out of the way.)

Dillon: Fire? (John gets up and fires at Set. Set looks down at him and swipes him away with his hand. Marlow then runs over and slashes at Set with his scythe three times.)

Marlow: You're f*cking dead. (Set picks Marlow up and throws him at the wall.) Gah! (He lands on the treasure pile and the Mask of Death floats up to him.)

Mask: That was pathetic.

Marlow: Shut up. (We go back to Wario. He's approaching Kirby scarily before an arrow skins his shoulder. Wario turns around to see Lara with a bow.)

Lara: You asked for it. (She fires another shot at Wario and it hits him in the chest. Wario pulls the arrow out and breaks it in half. He then charges at Lara and uses his Wario waft which blows Lara far back.) Ew. Disgusting.

Wario: Oops. Scuse me. (Kirby then runs up and slides into Wario which knocks him over.) Urgh...

(We cut to Dillon using a rolling attack on Set's face. He lands on the other side of the lava pit next to John, who is still firing shots at Set.)

John: My bullets aren't doing anything. (Marlow runs up from behind them and jumps onto Set's back. Set growls in response. Marlow stabs his scythe into Set's back.)

Marlow: How do you like that?

(We cut back to Lara and Kirby backed up against a wall. Wario is standing in front of them.)

Wario: (Taking out a bob-omb.) Looks like this is the end. See you later, losers. (Wario throws his bob-omb and Lara braces for impact. However, Kirby inhales the bob-omb and transforms into Bomb Kirby.) What?!

Kirby: Yah! (Kirby throws a barrage of bombs at Wario.)

Wario: Oh no! (They explode and Wario is sent through the ceiling of the pyramid while screaming. He leaves a Wario-shaped hole as the pyramid begins to tremble. We cut back to Marlow on Set.)

Marlow: Why's the place shaking? (Set grabs Marlow and throws him onto the ground with the others. Set begins to start a fire attack when a large chunk of the ceiling falls onto Set and seals him in the lava pool.) That takes care of him.

Lara: We need to get out of here! (The camera pans over to see the wall breaking to the outside. There are some rocks in the way.)

John: There's a way out. Come on! (Everyone except Lara moves to the wall and starts removing rocks. Lara begins to go too but something catches her eye. The camera pans to see a shard of the Shadow Crystal on the treasure pile. Lara picks it up before going to help the others. We cut to the outside of the pyramid as Marlow pushes a rock out of the wall and outside.)

Marlow: We have a way out! (Marlow escapes the pyramid as the rest quickly follow. We cut to a wide shot of the pyramid as it collapses.)

(We cut to our heroes now far from the pyramid. They are all catching their breath.)

Marlow: I don't know what the h*ll that was, but I'm glad we're okay.

Lara: Yeah, and I grabbed this. (Lara pulls out the shard of the Shadow Crystal.)

John: A gem?

Mask: A piece of the Shadow Crystal.

Marlow: The what?

Mask: A powerful jewel made by the stars. It held an evil that attacked our world. What was it doing inside the pyramid?

Dillon: What did the jewel hold?

Mask: A menace known only as Master Mind. He angered the Gods greatly.

Kirby: Poyo?

John: Master Mind. We were told about him.

Dillon: We've been sent to stop him.

Mask: So he's been released?

Lara: Is that why all this strange nonsense has been happening?

Marlow: Tep, are we in trouble?

Mask: Undoubtedly. We may all perish if he isn't stopped soon.

Marlow: Then let's go. I'm coming with you guys.

Lara: So am I.

John: Then we better get a move on.

Kirby: (Pointing forward.) Poyo! (Our heroes all set out through the desert. We suddenly hear screaming as Wario lands on his butt where our heroes were standing. He is charred.)

Wario: Ugh... what a rotten day. (He falls backwards, unconscious.)

End of Episode