Score: Castle on the Hill - Ed Sheeran

Lydia

Mark Carter is one of my and Gloria's best childhood friends.

The Carters are friends from university with Gloria's dad, and, therefore, have known my dad since before I was born. We were all pretty close before The Incident. The three of us used to have sleepovers at Gloria's, till Gloria and I turned ten and our parents decided it was not appropriate anymore to be sharing the same bedroom with a boy.

Mark went to our school, two years ahead of us. He has a sister, Lily, who is much younger than us.

Also, Mark Carter is the first boy I ever kissed.

Like, properly.

Well, I guess it wasn't really "real", as it was part of a stupid dare, but yet, to me, it was a big deal back then.

Lame, I know.

We went on a ski trip in Italy two years ago, in February, all of us with our families, Patrick, Gloria, Alex, Nate, the Carters, and I. That was right before my mother tried to kill herself. All of us stayed at the same hotel, and our parents put "the kids" together.

So, we shared a massive flat on the last floor of the hotel, Gloria, Alex, and I shared a bedroom, and Patrick, Nate, and Mark stayed in the studio across from us. That was a pretty convenient arrangement, as Alex was constantly sneaking across the hall into the boys' room to be with Nate. They had been dating for a while at that point and lost their virginities to each other on that trip.

Patrick and I weren't dating yet, though Gloria was positive he liked me. She was sure he would make a move on me on that trip.

I thought I liked him, too, and I hoped Gloria was right. I was also extremely nervous the whole time. I had never had a boyfriend before, and I'd turn ridiculous shades of crimson every time I caught a glimpse of Patrick staring at me.

Mark and Patrick were pissed that they were constantly being locked outside of their studio, and they spent a lot of time in our room. We played cards and drinking games. That was the first time I got drunk, like, really drunk, as well.

I had drunk before, and I was playing tough, doing shots with the boys in a stupid card game that basically made you drink on every draw. I recall hugging the toilet and Gloria pissing herself, laughing, as she was holding my hair back, while I tried to flush what seemed like a pint of vodka from my body.

One night, when Alex and Nate were able to stay physically detached from each other for long enough, all of us played Never Have I Ever and Truth or Dare. I had embarrassed myself in front of everyone, admitting on a round of Truth or Dare that I had never snogged anyone, at almost sixteen, before Gloria dared Mark to kiss me.

Killing two birds with one stone, she had called it: fixing my snogging...err...situation, and making Patrick jealous. He hadn't made his move yet and she was disappointed because she was certain he should have done something already.

Also, Mark was safe territory. He was playing the cool, older guy, complaining that he had to hang out with the "nursery" and play stupid, childish games. He was mine and Gloria's best friend, and completely not interested in me, or Gloria, in any other than a platonic you-are-just-a-guy-friend-who-just-grew-boobs-over-the-summer kind of way.

But Patrick didn't need to know that.

"You can thank me later," Gloria had mouthed, as I shuffled in my place before completing the dare.

I remember being insanely nervous as I moved to my knees from where I was sitting on the floor to stand in front of Mark. He smiled at me, asking for my permission before he leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. My hands were shaking and my breath caught, as he pushed his tongue into my mouth to meet mine. It briefly swept the inside of my mouth, leading mine in circles, once, twice, and then he pulled away, breaking the kiss.

His mouth was soft against mine, and he tasted like the whisky we had all been drinking that night, and mint.

He looked into my eyes briefly, but intensely, as he lifted his face away from mine, as if looking for assurance that I was OK. I nodded and he moved to sit back in his place across from me, leaving me breathless and shaking, where I was kneeling in the middle of our circle.

I don't think that he is, to this day, aware what a big deal that kiss was to me. It seemed like it had been nothing special to him, but my mind had exploded into a million tiny pieces, every one of them repeating the moment over and over again, until they were put back together, branding the moment into my memory forever.

I remember that when I finally came back to reality, I felt changed somehow.

That same night, Alex stayed in our flat for the first time since we had arrived and Gloria, Alex, and I stayed up all night, chatting about Alex's newly established sex life and my first kiss.

Alex was the first one of us to lose her virginity and was giving us all the spice, and Gloria was making fun of me for fussing so much over kissing Mark. She was also disappointed that her plan to make Patrick jealous clearly hadn't worked.

Granted, on the very next morning Patrick came to our room, looking at his feet, and confessed his feelings for me.

Gloria was ecstatic. Patrick and I consider that day, 21st February, as our anniversary.

Then the pandemic hit and my mum took all those pills. When the lockdown was announced, I stopped hanging out with anybody, except Patrick, Alex, and Gloria. That is when my friendship with Mark went on pause.

I know Mark's parents divorced at about the same time and his father moved out and away from London, and Mark and his little sister stayed with their mum. When he left school and travel restrictions were lifted, he took some time to travel and then moved to the US for university.

I haven't heard much from him since.

What I can tell is that he looks different now. I swear he has grown a little taller and is now almost as tall as Patrick. Mark is leaner, though, as Patrick has buffed up a lot in the past year, due to all the rugby training.

Mark is wearing black jeans and a black shirt, the top 2 buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, revealing a set of toned, tanned forearms. There's a gold chain, glinting off the fairy lights, peeking through his open shirt, with something like a charm, dangling on it. Looks like a gold rectangular plate pendant, but my eyes just skim over it, moving up to meet his smiling, golden-brown eyes. The eyes that I haven't seen in two years, yet I knew so well, when we were kids, and are now looking into mine with so much emotion that my heart swells. Crinkles frame them, as he smiles at me, the light from the lights above our heads playing with the shadows around his eyes. His face is tanned, too, which, I'd reckon, is the result of living in LA full-time now.

Is it LA? I am not entirely sure, but I believe he goes to UCLA.

He is wearing white Converse sneakers, which look nice with his shirt and jeans.
His hair is also different now, he has grown it longer and wears it pushed back and away from his forehead. It looks black in the evening twilight.

His jaw is sharper, way more defined than it was when he was eighteen, and there is a light stubble covering his face. I have grown to like facial hair since Patrick started growing a beard, and I wonder what Mark's would feel like if I ran my cheek against it...

Whoa! What?! Why did I just think that?

I look around, slamming back into reality, noticing that Patrick has caught up with us and is standing behind my back, eyes locked on Mark. He drapes his arm around my shoulders and I lean on him. He hugs me closer in, as he reaches his other hand to take Mark's for a handshake.

"Hey, mate, long time no see! How have you been? I am glad to see you again!"

"Yeah, good, thanks! I'm good, man, just came back today."

"Oh, are you back for the summer?" I ask, trying to step into the conversation.

"Yeah, I took my exams early to come here for my dad's wedding. My mum thinks it's a good idea to spend more time with him," he shrugs his shoulders, giving away the impression that he is not as convinced as his mum.

"Your dad's getting remarried?"

Little nosy Lydia. Inveterate case.

"Yeah, he is, in August. I decided to spend the whole summer in London. I would have come for the wedding, anyway. I haven't seen him much since he left two years ago."

"Where exactly do you live now? Like, which state?" Patrick asks, clearly changing the subject.

"We're in LA," Mark responds, confirming my previous notion.

How do I know this?

No idea... Instagram?

"Oh, nice!" Patrick says and they start talking about schools in California.

As they keep talking, I continue my Mark-Carter-US-Transformation inspection.

He looks a lot older now, even though it hasn't even been two full years since I last saw him. He looks like he has seen and experienced life, not necessarily the good stuff. I am kind of acquainted with that look. I have seen its mark on way too many familiar faces.

He also looks generally a lot fitter, like, he is not a kid anymore, he is a lot more masculine. He used to be the tall, lanky type as a teenager, and now he has grown a little more...solid. Yet, somehow, still lean.

And his eyes...the same golden-brown eyes, which bore into mine that night he kissed me, two years ago on that ski trip...

Suddenly those eyes move away from Patrick and lock with mine.

I take a little while to realize that I have been staring before I look away.

By the heat, spreading over my chest and face, I get the idea of just how intensely I have blushed. I lace my fingers through Patrick's and pull him closer to me.

I wonder if anyone else caught me staring. I glance over at Gloria, and she is looking at me.

Oh, God!

I just hope she hasn't been looking for very long. By the look on her face, though, I believe she has caught the whole show.

"I'ma go check on Alex," I tell Patrick and start walking in the direction of Nate and Alex.

Flip-flop-flip-flop, I can hear sliders behind me and I know Gloria's following in my footsteps. She catches up with me and hooks one arm around my elbow, walking by my side.

"Oh, My God, he is hot, right?" She says in my ear, grabbing another glass of champagne at the same time. "Like, he is aging like fine wine, girl!"

"Aging?" I laugh "Gloria, he is-what-twenty? Twenty-one at the most?"

"That's aging, Lyds! He has crossed the half-mark to forty."

I burst into laughter, as we both arrive at the foot of the lounge chair Nate and Alex are still chilling on.

The next couple of hours pass in talking with Alex, Gloria, and Nate, drinking, and discussing our classmates' plans for the summer. I am actually having a pretty decent time. Once my social anxiety subsides a little, as in every social situation in the past 2 years, I relax and engage in conversation a lot easier, even with people that I am not that close to.

In what seems like no time, Patrick touches my shoulder gently and says softly in my ear, while I am chatting with Greg and Anita about their travel itinerary this summer.

"Ready?"

I look at him, pleading.

"Can we stay a little longer, please? I am having a nice time!"

"Sorry, Lyds, I need to be up early. I have a game tomorrow, remember?"

"I know. I just thought we might stay for a little longer, as this is our leavers' party..."

"It's not true. Our leavers' party is in July, you know that."

"Yeah, but, I mean this is the real deal, isn't it? Today was the last day of school..."

"Lydia, you knew we'd leave early even before we came."

"I know..." I look at my feet and let him drag me to Gloria to say goodnight.

"Where do you two think you are going?" I hear Alex's voice behind me.

Gloria turns her head in our direction, prompted by Alex's voice, and pads quickly to where we are standing.

"You are not leaving, are you?"

"Sorry, Glo, I have a game in the morning..." Patrick shrugs his shoulders in a Duty Calls kind of fashion, but Alex interrupts him by putting her hand up in the air in front of his face.

"So does Nate, but we are staying over tonight and he is going straight to the game tomorrow. He brought all his clothes and stuff."

"You can stay, as well. There is plenty of room. I actually thought you were going to stay the night." Gloria chimes in.

"No, we have to go back to town. I haven't brought any clothesand Iy need to sleep before the game. It is kind of a big deal..."

"Lydia can stay over, though..." Gloria puts her arm around my shoulder and half-swings her body around mine.

"Don't you have to study?" Patrick looks at me and I am instantly a little annoyed at his remark.

Yes, I need to study for my A-levels, but it is just one night and I haven't had fun in such a long time. Also, it ly none of his business whether or not I am revising for my exams. I am an adult, who can be responsible for her actions.

"Yeah, I do, but it is just one night, Patrick. It's no big deal."

"I thought taking your exams was a big deal to you," he raises his eyebrow, challenging me.

"It is..."

"So why are you being difficult about a stupid party, when you need to be home, studying anyway?"

"I am not being difficult! It's just...Today was our last day of school! Everyone's here! Our friends are here! I am having a really good time, for once!"

"Fine. I am leaving, now. Either come with me or stay here. Alex and Nate can take you to the match tomorrow. You decide."

He is looking at me, challenge clear in his eyes. By his tone I can tell that he is very certain I will go back to London with him, right now. But that's making me want to stay even more.

I don't like to be challenged, and I like even less being told what to do. It is not like I am committing a crime by wanting to spend some time with my friends, at a party, at one of my best friends' house.

"Fine. See you tomorrow," I smile sweetly and lift up on my tiptoes to plant a small kiss on his cheek. I then turn around, padding my feet on the stone tiles.

I don't turn around when Patrick calls my name, but with two steps, he is next to me, grabbing at my arm.

"Are you serious?"

"You told me I had a choice," I yank my arm free from his grip and cross my arms over my chest.

"Fine. Do as you wish. Just don't come crying on my shoulder when you realize you have wasted precious time."

"I won't. It's OK. It's just one night, baby. Just...Trust me." I smile up at him and reach up to his face with my hand to caress his cheek.

His face softens and he leans into my palm.

"OK, then. I trust you. See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. See you tomorrow. Text me when you are home, OK?"

He sweeps his lips over mine and then walks towards the door.

I walk over to where Gloria and Mark are taking mixing lessons from the guy at the cocktail pavilion with a huge grin on my face.

"I guess I am staying, then," I say, beaming, and Gloria hands me the drink she has just prepared. I scrunch my nose and sniff it, suspiciously.

"Yes, baby! Cheers!" She clinks her glass against mine and wraps her arm around my shoulder.