#NewClassicNRO

Chapter 15
First Gig

The bugs under my eyes felt so heavy the moment I woke up. I pulled out an all-nighter binge watching a movie series. I didn't do it just for fun though. After watching all three movies under that one series, I still wrote a film analysis which consisted of eight pages.

The paper was due on Monday but I had to work on it the whole Saturday. I finished at around four in the morning, then woke up at seven to hear the mass with my family. Pagkagaling nga lang sa simbahan ay muli akong nagkulong sa aking kuwarto. I told my parents that I had to do something, but the truth was I only slept until it was time for me to prepare for my first ever night out.

That day marked the first ever gig of Jirro with his friends or bandmates. Jirro told me that they would perform for free at the bar which was owned by a friend of Ike's father. They decided that they wouldn't take any payment since it was their first performance. They had no idea if they would satisfy their audiences. It was like a free trial for them.

"Tuloy ba kayo mamaya?" tanong sa akin ni daddy pagkatapos kong maligo.

Tumango naman ako. "Susunduin po ako ni Jirro nang mga alas-kuwatro."

Tumikhim si daddy. 'Di ko nagugustuhan ang nakikita kong pagdadalawang-isip niya. Nahirapan akong magpaalam sa kanya noong isang araw. He was hesitant on letting me out to go in a bar. Jirro had to help me ask permission. Madami silang pinag-usapan na hindi ko nadinig. Pero kung ano man ang pinag-usapan nila ni Jirro, hindi ko na masyadong kinutya nang pinayagan akong sumama.

"Tapos mo na ba ang mga kailangan mong gawin para sa eskuwela?"

Biglang kumabog ang aking dibdib nang madinig ang boses ni mommy. I turned to her as she was just out of the kitchen. She was wearing a very stern look on her face. Hindi ako direkta kay mommy nagpaalam noong isang araw dahil hindi pa kami magkaayos. Ngunit sinabi naman ni daddy na siya na ang magsasabi kay mommy.

"Natapos ko na po kahapon..." kinakabahan kong sagot.

My mother squinted her eyes as her eyebrows narrowed. She seemed skeptical about my answer. Hindi ko rin maiwasan na mas kabahan pa lalo kahit na nagsasabi naman ako ng totoo. The way she stared at me made me feel like I was lying, even though I wasn't.

"Wala ka bang quiz o exam bukas?" sunod niyang tanong.

"Wala po..." Doon lamang ako nagsinungaling.

We had two quizzes on schedule. Kaya nga lang ay alam kong hindi ko dapat aminin 'yon kay mommy. She wouldn't let me out to watch Jirro's first gig if she knew. She was obsessed with trying to make me study even during my free time.

Alam ko namang importante ang pag-aaral, lalo na at mayroong scholarship na dapat kinakapitan. I had to study hard to maintain my grades. However, I knew I shouldn't just stick my nose on those books and papers. I didn't want to miss important life events for the sake of academics. I didn't want to become the type of person who would shut the world out and live inside the corners of my room to study and prove something. I wanted to have fun, too. I wanted to enjoy life and college.

Medyo nahihirapan nga lang ako dahil hindi pa ako sanay. I was constantly adjusting, but I wanted to learn how to balance my time and avoid draining myself out all the time.

Hindi na nagsalita si mommy matapos kong sabihin sa kanya na wala akong pagsusulit kinabukasan. Hinayaan na nila akong maghanda para sa aking lakad.

I spent so much time dolling myself up for that night. It was my first time going to a bar so I tried looking in the internet for an outfit inspiration. Mas namroblema nga lang ako dahil wala akong katulad ng mga damit na sinusuot ng mga babaeng nasa internet. Good thing I had a plain red off-shoulder dress that I had not worn yet. I did my hair―clipping one side to create that side swept effect as a hairstyle. I also chose a bit darker shade of red for my blush and liptint.

Gusto ko sanang gayahin iyong mga smokey makeup na nakita ko sa internet, kaya nga lang ay mukhang hindi bagay sa akin. At saka sa tingin ko rin ay hindi iyon magugustuhan ni daddy. Baka tuluyan na niya akong hindi payagan.

Pagkatapos kong mag-ayos ay saktong tumunog ang aking cellphone para sa tawag ni Jirro. Agad ko naman iyong sinagot.

"Nandito ka na?" bungad kong tanong.

"Yup," he replied. "You done already?"

"Uhm, aayusin ko pa ang gamit ko. Give me five minutes."

"No worries," he said. "Just take your time, okay?"

"Okay. Baba ko na 'to para maayos ko na."

"Okay, okay. See you."

Once the call ended, I scampered around the room to get all the things I needed to bring. Even though Jirro asked me to take my time, I couldn't possibly make him wait. I didn't want him to wait for me. I made sure thought that I wouldn't forget to bring his DSLR. I wouldn't want to miss the opportunity of documenting his first official gig with his band mates.

Nang makalabas ako ng kuwarto ay kita kong masinsinang kinakausap ni daddy ni Jirro. But when he noticed that I was already out of my room, daddy acted like he was saying nothing. Si Jirro ay napalingon sa akin at agad na sumilay ang kanyang ngiti bago ako sinalubong.

We couldn't do any intimate skin ship in front of my father. I sensed Jirro holding himself back the last minute. Kaysa batiin ng yakap ay hinawakan niya na lamang ang aking kamay.

"Aalis na po kami, Tito," Jirro told my father.

Tumango naman si daddy at mukhang walang pakialam. Ngumuso ako bahagya bago bumitaw saglit kay Jirro para humalik sa pisngi ni daddy.

"Uuwi po ako bago mag-alas onse," sabi ko.

My father gave us a curfew. Gusto nga ni mommy, alas-diyes lang dapat ay nakauwi na ako. But given the location of the bar, it was impossible to come home at ten. Alas-nuebe nakaschedule ang performance ng banda ni Jirro at paniguradong traffic pauwi dahil dadaan kami sa EDSA.

"Mag-iingat kayong dalawa," sabi ni daddy sa akin bago nilingon si Jirro gamit ang kanyang matalim na tingin. "Siguraduhin mong iuuwi mo ang anak ko, Jirro. May tiwala ako sa 'yo."

Realizing what my father was talking about, I felt all the blood rushed up to my cheeks. I wanted to turn crawl into a corner and face the wall until the embarrassment faded, but I was left with no choice. I just turned my face away from Jirro.

"Makakaasa po kayo, Tito," walang pag-aalinlangang sabi ni Jirro.

Mabuti na lang at pinakawalan na kami ni daddy pagkatapos naming magpaalam. Hindi na kami nakapagpaalam ni Jirro kay mommy dahil ang sabi ni daddy ay lumabas ito. Though, it was actually more favorable to me that she wasn't around that time. I didn't want to think about how she would react if she heard what my father told Jirro.

"We will eat dinner first before we go to the bar," Jirro informed me what he planned to do for tonight, while his eyes were focused on the road. "Makakarating siguro tayo sa BGC around six. We still have time to eat."

I nodded quietly, then I suddenly thought of his band mates. "Nasaan na pala ang mga kaibigan mo?"

"After naming magpractice kanina, umuwi muna kami kanya-kanya," sabi niya. "But I know they will eat their dinner at the bar. Nagseserve din kasi ng meals doon."

"Kung ganoon, doon din ba tayo kakain?"

Jirro turned to me with smile on his face. He quickly shook his head. "I booked a restaurant at the hotel near the bar."

My lips parted in surprise. "Hindi ba mahal doon?"

While driving using one hand, Jirro reached for my hand using the one resting on the shifter. "You don't have to worry about it," he assured me. "We didn't really go on proper dates since the school year started. I was able to save money."

Pursing my lips, I still couldn't help but feel bad. The last time we went out to eat in a Japanese restaurant, he already paid for it. I wanted to volunteer paying for our dinner tonight, but I knew I didn't have enough. Pakiramdam ko ay mamahalin ang napiling restaurant ni Jirro na kailangan pang magpabook.

When the car halted as the traffic light turned red, Jirro faced half of his body to me. He playfully pinched my nose and chuckled.

I frowned and pouted at him. The amusement in his eyes flickered more.

"You're worrying too much, babe," he said in his softest voice, then gave my hand a squeeze. "Just let me spoil you tonight. I really want to take you out on a proper dinner date. Plus, you're wearing a beautiful dress. It's a waste not to take you out to a place you deserve."

With those heart-fluttering words coming out of Jirro's lips, I completely forgot about all my worries. He was right. That was the first time he'd be taking me out on a proper dinner date. I'd give that to him as a celebration for his first band gig.

Jirro took me to a high-end hotel at the Fort. I praised myself for making the right decision to wear a dress. Those who were dining with us were all wearing smart casual attire. Though I knew I couldn't really afford the dishes served here on a daily basis, I was comforted by the fact that I didn't look out of place.

While watching Jirro casually read the menu given by the server, I realized that he seemed like a regular costumer. Siguro ay madalas siyang makapunta rito.

"May napili ka ba sa menu or should I order for the both of us?" Jirro raised his eyes on me.

Napaawang ang aking mga labi bago ginalaw ang menu na binigay rin sa akin. I was busy observing other people dining. I also thought Jirro would take care of everything kaya hindi ko na naisipang mamili ng aking kakainin.

Nang makita ko kung magkano ang presyo ng mga pagkain ay halos atakihin ako sa kamahalan. Ang side dishes ay mas mahal pa sa two-piece fried chicken sa mga fast food. Alam kong pumayag na akong kumain doon, ngunit parang gusto kong hatakin paalis si Jirro.

In the end, I just closed the menu and shot a look at Jirro who was waiting for me. "Uhm, ikaw na ang bahala," sabi ko na lang.

With that, Jirro nodded and began reciting the orders to the server. Hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko sa pagko-kompyut ng kanyang mga binaggit sa aking isipan. We easily went over five thousand pesos.

"You're still worrying about the expenses, aren't you?" Jirro asked me after the server left us to get our orders done.

I couldn't speak. I just remained staring at the glass of cold water in front of me. I felt like it was a sin to spend that much for a dinner. Makakabili na ako nang pang-isang buwan na groceries namin sa bahay sa gagastusin ni Jirro.

"Alam ko namang mahal ang kakainan natin, pero hindi ko naisip na ganitong kamahal, Jirro," pag-amin ko sa kanya. "Nanghihinayang ako sa gagastusin. Sana ay hindi mo na ako rito dinala."

Jirro bit his lower lip that it turned crimson. I didn't want to make him feel bad for trying to treat me a very nice and expensive meal, but it just didn't seem right to me. I was trying hard to budget my allowance just to get through the trimester without asking much to my parents. And yet, there we were, spending thousands for a meal.

"Cloe, I told you..." he quietly said, and the sadness I found in his eyes clenched my heart. "I saved my allowance for this. Please, Cloe... Just for tonight. Stop worrying about it. I took you here to try new things with you and make you happy, not to feel you bad nor guilty."

I opened my mouth to speak and defend my sentiments, but I realized that I was ruining the night which was meant to be special. The excitement I saw in Jirro's eyes when we were at the car totally disappeared. His heart-wrenching expression made me feel guiltier. I felt responsible for making him sad.

Naging mabilis ang pagkain namin. Hindi na kami masyadong nag-usap ni Jirro. We focused finishing our meals, making sure that there was no leftovers.

Habang hinihintay ang valet ay kumapit ako sa braso niya. I rested my head on his shoulders. I heard him blew out a deep sigh as his shoulders rose higher and fell deeper.

"I'm sorry..." I apologized for being too inconsiderate. I didn't think about his feelings and just focused on mine. I forgot to tell him that I appreciated what he did for me. "I know it was insensitive of me to say those things earlier."

Ang aking kamay na nakakapit sa kanyang braso ay agad niyang hinawakan. Feeling the warmth of his hand comforted me. It made me feel like I was already forgiven.

"It's okay," he said, his voice breathy. "I understand where you're coming from. You've been too hard on yourself to budget your allowance. I know that. But I hope you won't take it against me if I want to spend for you sometimes."

Napanguso ako. Mas lalo kong hinigpitan ang aking pagkapit sa kanyang braso hanggang sa dumating ang kanyang sasakyan.

Once we were inside the car, our atmosphere shifted back to normal. Jirro tried to liven up our mood by throwing corny jokes. He partedthe dark clouds hovering over us and gave me sunshine. Hedid everything to make me smile, even though I was the one who rained on that special night.

At dahil malapit lang ang hotel sa bar kung saan sila tutugtog ay mabilis kaming nakarating. His friends were already waiting for him. Gusto pa sanang makipagkuwentuhan sa akin ni Sic, ngunit agad din siyang tinangay palayo nina Isaiah at Ike. Ipinuwesto naman ako ni Jirro sa lamesa na halos katapat lang ng stage. Iniwanan niya rin ako agad upang maghanda.

Inihanda ko na rin ang kanyang DSLR. Jirro got me a good position kaya hindi ko na kailangang tumayo para maghanap ng maganda anggulo.

Just after five minutes, the band already went up to the stage. I didn't know why but I started getting nervous, especially when I saw Jirro pursing his lips tight while plucking some chords on his bass guitar to make sure that it was on tune.

I had never seen him nervous. He was always confident performing when we were still in high school. Hindi man halata siguro sa ibang tao ang kanyang nerbiyos, but knowing him well made me realize that he was indeed nervous for their first gig.

"Good evening, everyone," Isaiah started speaking through the microphone once they were done setting up their instruments. "Just a heads up, we're going to sing a self-composed song so it wouldn't be familiar to you. I hope you all will love it, though."

Some who were paying attention to the band clapped and cheered for them. I had to let go of the DSLR just to clap along. I saw Jirro looked in my direction. I smiled broadly and gave him two thumbs up.

"This is Done With You, and we are New Classic."

Muli kong inayos ang camera para masimulan na ang pagvivideo.

Like every time he played his guitar, Jirro bit his lower lip and looked down to check the position of his fingers on the fret board. He did it fast, then raised his gaze up to me again as they started playing.

I open my eyes in the morning
Only to find tear stains on my cheeks
I saw you in my dreams
You're already with someone else

I got chills the moment Isaiah sang the first verse. I had not heard him sing until that night. Jirro wasn't lying when he told me how good Isaiah is when it comes to singing. Nasabi niya rin sa akin na isinulat ni Isaiah ang kantang kinakanta nila.

I don't want this broken heart anymore
I don't want to miss you no more

Oh-oh-oh...
Oh-oh-oh...
Now, I'm so done with you
Oh-oh-oh...
Oh-oh-oh...
Tonight, I'll be through with you

I was constantly praising the band inside my head while watching them perform. The self-composed song is such a good one. Medyo hindi ko na nga naaayos ang pagkakavideo ko sa kanila. They were so enticing. Aside from performing well, they all look handsome, too. So rather than watching them through the screen of the camera, I wanted to look at them clearly.

Jirro was constantly giving me smiles and glances throughout their performance. Nawala na ang nerbiyos sa kanyang mga mata. The stage lights were reflecting on his eyes which made it shine brighter. He was already possessed by their music. He was enjoying playing with the band. I could tell that the audience was also loving their performance.

Sumabog ang palakpakan nang matapos ang banda sa pagtugtog. Ang kaninang mga hindi pumapansin sa kanila ay nakipalakpak na. The boys looked relief and proud of themselves, knowing that they did well.

Nakita kong humiwalay si Jirro kina Isaiah, Ike, at Sic pagkababa nila ng entablado. I watched him as he quickly marched to my table without any hesitation.

"Ang galing ninyo! Congrats―"

I couldn't finish congratulating him as he began moving quickly. Once he was right in front of me, he took my hand to make me stand up and then pulled me for a tight embrace.

As my head was against his chest, I could hear his heart beating wildly. His heart was screaming happiness in each and every beat, like it was celebrating a big feast.

"Thank you for being here tonight," Jirro suddenly expressed a heartfelt gratitude. "I love you, Cloe. I really do."