The look he's giving me sends shivers down my spine. Oh, no. Does he know about the scholarship? Is that why he left me? No, he can't know. Right, I was going to be honest before he distracted me. Let's stick to that and see if he knows. I shimmy my arm out of his grip and look up at him.

"I want to move on; forget about you. But I'm afraid I'll never be able to if you don't do what I asked you to the very first day we met."

"A kiss?"

"Yes, a kiss."

"I want to move on too and I don't think I will if I kiss you."

"Oh." I look down again, embarrassed. "That's okay then.

"Look, I don't know why you're crying, but I don't want you to suffer or carry any more pain than you have to. I refuse to add to it so, it's fine. I'll leave without your kiss."

I start backing away, but as I try to turn, my hand is picked up and my body slams back into his. I gasp in surprise.

"You would never intentionally hurt me."

"Never." I confirm, and so he lets go.

"McKay, I'm not well."

"You seemed fine when you were with Nina."

I can see on his face that my rebuttal is far from appreciated. So I decide to focus on him. He hurt me, but that doesn't mean I should turn my back on him when he needs my help and comfort.

"Why aren't you well?"

"I'm empty. There's nothing that gets me out of bed or makes me happy in my life."

"That's a large statement."

"It's an enormous guilt."

"For hurting me?" He glances over at me. "I mean, why?"

"You hurt me too. You do know that, right?"

"I don't. You never told me, and God knows you never let it show. But, forget all that. Is there anything..."

"I'm afraid there's nothing I can do."

"There is always something that can be done."

"McKay."

"I'm not even sure I should be here for this. But maybe the key here is not focussing on your happiness, but on the happiness of others."

"I should help someone else?"

I nod before turning to leave him.

This time, he doesn't stop me.

I return to the book signing and when Danatha has had all her copies signed, we go outside to catch a cab back to the hotel. I am more than ready to relax. But then, Trudy comes through the door with two gym bags slung on either arm.

"Sorry girls, I need to get dressed in here. The guys are too much this week. How are we, by the way?"

"Great," smiles Danatha. "I'm having a blast. How've you been?"

"Working my jelly tail off. Oh, fuck where are the shoes? Shit."

She rummages in her bag.

"What size are you? Maybe I can lend you a pair."

"Found them. Let me pop in the shower."

"Oh, I'm meeting Jude in half an hour. Do you mind if I go first?"

"Not at all. Go ahead."

Danatha rushes off into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Trudy lies on the couch and turns to me.

"What's her name again?"

"Danatha."

"And you're..."

Well, I guess she won't be thanking me for saving her ass from that creep at Patina's. She doesn't even recognise me. Maybe Aden was right; maybe she's fine with the way he was treating her, because otherwise, she'd be grateful.

"McKenzie. McKay."

"Right, Aden's girl."

"No, not Aden's girl. We're not together anymore."

"Oh, thank God. Who told you?"

Told me what? I don't want to make it obvious that I don't know, but I panic anyway, saying the first name that comes to mind.

"Nathan."

"Oh, that's weird." She frowns. "But I'm glad someone told you the truth, even if he was the one laughing the most about it."

"Aden didn't even respond when I asked him about it. He just left."

"Ha, lol. Did he say he needs to speak to his mom? I mean, any excuse involving his mom really. You know that's his tell, right?"

"Yeah." I lie. "But I don't get it. It really wasn't that funny."

"Tell me about it. But also, in general, I hate how they speak about women, even the ones they respect somewhat - and that's a thick somewhat. They call your friend a Baddie; whatever that means. And they call that other girl, Nathan's girl, Jess Joystick."

"Nathan has a girl?" I divert.

I am desperate to know what they called me.

"The one from San Fran. I haven't seen that other girl from, I think it's Paris, in a long time. Wasn't her name Valeria? There's no point in keeping count with Nathan and Jude anyway. Well Jude has been slowing down, but Nathan-"

"What are they calling me though? Nathan didn't want to tell me. He said it's better if I don't know."

"Typical Nate. They were calling you horny Mary Poppins and at some point - don't ask me when - they switched it to Face-brace. Wait, Face-brace is another of Aden's girls, isn't it? You know about her - Bitty."

Her name is Brighid - Brighid Temani. I look down at my phone screen in attempt to hide my tears from Trudy.

So Aden really did have something with her; otherwise, Trudy would never have known about her. And apparently, I'm horny Mary Poppins as well as Face-brace - I'm sure that one is about me too. I can't wait to see what kind of excuse Aden will come up with for this mess.

After showering and getting dressed, I follow Trudy downstairs to the reception where we're to wait for everyone to arrive. Danatha and Jude are sitting at a table alone, chatting while Nathan is already at the bar talking to two giggling women who look older than him. I'm not shocked when Aden and Callisto bound down the stairs and completely ignore me, heading over to the bar to join Nathan.

When I turn, Danatha is glancing my way. I smile to reassure her that I'm fine and get back to surveying the people going in and out of the hotel. Finally, some guys in suits show up and everyone around me gets up and goes to the dining lounge of the hotel. Of course, a table is already set for us.

People sit as I watch, confused about where I should be. When I decide to go for the last seat next to Yves, some crew guy enters the hall laughing and sits, unaware of what he's done.

That's when all seated look up at me in confusion. I'm the only one still standing. An awkward silence ensues. But just as I see Danatha frown at Jude and attempt to stand up, Aden extends an arm backward for a chair, flicks his wrist and moves it out, inviting me to go sit with him. His expression tells me all I need to know - he feels obligated to help me.

I calmly make my way to the table and sit next to him. This is the last thing I want after what I heard from Trudy, but it's not like I have a choice. We all order simultaneously to a crew of seven waiters then wait for our meals whilst conversing - not that I'm conversing. Aden is next to me frowning down at his empty plate, lost in his thoughts. Meanwhile, I am getting lost in his scent.

I am so angry with him, but dammit, I missed him so much; I didn't even realize how much until now. When we had been up on the roof, the only temptation was his proximity. His cologne had been stripped away by the high breeze that had been blowing.

Now, he's here next to me, and I want to lean into him and drink in his smell. Fuck, I already know what it would feel like to sneak my head into the crook of his neck and be curtained away from the world by his long hair.

Aden's eyes fly to mine. What the...? Did I say that out loud? No, there's no way. But then why are his eyes set on me? I pull my eyes away as I feel tears in them. I need to be strong and ignore him. I have no idea what he's playing at. He could be looking at me like he did during the book signing only to reject me again.

The food seems to take an inordinate amount of time to show up. I'm emotionally exhausted by the time it arrives. I push it around in my plate; not because I'm not hungry, but because I'm barely conscious enough to register that there's perfectly good food in front of me. Instead, I am remembering his deft caresses in Cleveland - the way his hands would firmly grip my thighs, scoring my skin with his cold rings.

"Eat."

I look over at him, annoyed.

"Don't talk to me."

"What are you mad about now?" he sighs.

"I'm mad that you're always trying to tell me what to do, what to say, how to feel, and now I know why."

"I'm sorry, but am I supposed to know what you're talking about?"

"When I asked you about what Callisto and Yves were laughing at in Detroit, the correct answer would have been that they were laughing because you called me horny Mary Poppins.

"And when I asked you why you still hadn't asked me to kiss you, you should have told me to kiss you right there instead of going behind my back to call me Face-brace." I grit, furious.

"I wasn't the one calling you that."

"Did you defend me?"

His jaw clenches.

"That's what I thought. So, don't you ever tell me what to do again. I'll eat when I want to." I snap back, getting up slowly to not draw attention to myself.

I don't care if they think I've gone to the bathroom; I'm going back to my room. I need privacy.

Once I'm safely on the bed, I scroll through our messages from weeks ago. Until this point, I have been strong enough to not do this. I've kept my distance from anything that reminds me of him.

But today is different because even though I'm not happy, my heart is still very much in love. Being so close to him tonight only reminded me how much I miss Aden - the Aden that was almost in love with me too.

My heart eventually stops racing and I'm left in a subdued state of heartbreak. I take a long shower when I think I'm about to cry for him and change into my pyjamas before going to lie in bed. I have every intention of sleeping too. By some small miracle, I begin to doze off after a while.

That's when I hear little noises out on the balcony doors. What now? I push myself out of bed, thinking that Danatha probably lost her key-card. I open the curtain and my heart beats faster.

It's Aden.