Thea was trying to read Silence of the Lambs on her window seat, a book Mr. Conn had recommended her. Apparently his wife had given birth and they named their daughter Theodosia. No, he didn't name his daughter after Thea, he just really liked the name, which is why he always called her by her full name. She looked out the window to see Dean lurking in the trees, waiting for Rory.

She closed her book, went to her desk and wrote something on a piece of paper and folded it to be as tiny as she could make it. She took off her charm bracelet (the baking one that Luke got her) and went to her closet. She opened it and took out her bow and an arrow. She went to her desk, tied the folded paper to the shaft of the arrow and went to open her window. As luck would have it, Dean didn't notice the window open.

She moved a few pillows out of the way and picked up the bow to nock an arrow. She moved this way and that to make sure that the arrow would hit right by Dean's head. She fired and watched with slight amusement as Dean flailed around a little because he probably didn't think someone would fire a weapon at him.

He looked around and then up at Thea's window who waved the bow at him and pointed at the arrow. She yelled, "Read the note!" at him.

Dean untied the note and unfolded it.

She had written Go home creep on it. He looked at her. She yelled, "Turn it around!" at him.

He turned it around to see that she had written put the arrow on the porch. He pulled the arrow out of the tree and went to set it on the porch.

The door opened and Thea heard Lorelai say, "Oh, hi. Rory's not home."

Dean explained, "I know, but Thea shot an arrow at me and—"

Thea closed the window at that. She did notice that Dean started to walk away from the house.

There was another Friday Night Dinner, and Thea really wished she could stay at home during Friday nights.

"Your grandfather called last night and told me to let you know he's bringing you back something very special from Prague," Emily said to Rory.

"Wow, Prague," Rory said amazed. "How amazing is it that he's going to Prague?"

"It's supposed to be lovely, very dramatic castles everywhere," Emily explained.

"Did you know the cell that Václav Havel was held in is now a hostel? You can stay there for like fifty dollars a night," Rory explained.

Thea noticed that Lorelai was taking avocado out of her salad. Rory said to her, "Hey, maybe on our big trip to Europe we could go to Prague and stay in his cell."

"Absolutely," Lorelai said. "And then we can go to Turkey and stay in that place from Midnight Express." She continued taking out the avocado.

Emily asked, "Lorelai, what are you doing?"

"Getting rid of the avocado," Lorelai told her, still taking out the avocado.

Emily asked, "Since when do you not like avocado?"

"Since the day I saw 'Gross, what is this' and you said 'avocado'," Lorelai explained.

Thea took a drink out of her soda.

Emily said, "Thea, what has your school been up to lately?"

Thea almost choked on her soda and said, "Uh, someone stole my math class's door and I think someone else stole a sink from the girl's restroom. The principal asked for the sink and door to be returned, but they weren't returned."

Lorelai asked, "Who steals a door and a sink?"

"Why steal a door and sink?" asked Rory.

Thea said, "You're not asking the important question: How?"

"Okay, Rory, I'm focusing on you now," Emily said. "Tell me all about the Chilton formal next week."

Lorelai asked, "There's a formal?"

Rory asked Emily, "How do you know about the formal?"

"Yeah, how do you know about the formal?" asked Lorelai.

"I read my Chilton newsletter," Emily told her.

Lorelai asked her, "Since when do you get a Chilton newsletter?"

"Well as a major contributor to Rory's education, I figured I had the right to ask for a newsletter to be sent to my house," Emily explained as she got her copy of the newsletter.

Lorelai asked, "Are you serious?"

"And it's a good thing, too, since you don't bother to read yours," Emily told Lorelai. "One of us should be up to date on the goings-on at Rory's school."

"Hey, Mom," Lorelai said. "I read my newsletter."

Actually, Thea say that Lorelai had set a mug of coffee down on it to use it as a coaster.

Doubtful, Emily asked, "You did?"

"That's right," Lorelai said.

Emily held the newsletter to her chest, "What was the picture on the cover?"

In an uncertain voice, Lorelai replied, "It was a picture of a really rich kid in plaid."

Emily showed her the cover, "It was a spotted owl."

"In plaid," Lorelai added.

"The owls are endangered and Chilton is taking donations to help them," Emily explained. To Rory, she said, "You gave a very nice one, in case you're interested."

"Mom, don't be giving donations on Rory's behalf," Lorelai said. "I'll do that."

Emily asked, "How can you do that when you don't bother to read the newsletter?"

"I read the newsletter," Lorelai said.

"You didn't know they were taking donations," Emily told her.

"It's a private school," Lorelai defended. "They're always taking donations. They teach a class in it. I'll get them next time."

"Well, what about the owls?" asked Emily.

"They'll live," Lorelai said.

"Apparently not, since that's why they need donations," Thea muttered.

Lorelai spoke to Rory, "So, you have a formal coming up?"

"Yeah, but I don't think I'm going to go," Rory said.

"Nonsense," Emily told her. "Of course you're going."

"Mom, if Rory doesn't want to go, she doesn't have to go," Lorelai told her.

"Well, I don't understand why she wouldn't want to go," Emily said.

Thea said, "Because they're boring and the only fun thing to do is watch how many people get wasted off of the spiked punch?"

"I'm gonna go get another Coke," Rory said, getting her glass and taking off.

Thea felt like she needed coke just to get to make it through this dinner. She tuned out their bickering and watched as Lorelai tossed aside the tomato.

Emily asked, "What's wrong with the tomato?"

"It was fraternizing with the enemy," Lorelai replied.

Thea tried to tune out the conversation with Lorelai and Rory, but she couldn't help but listen.

Lorelai asked Rory, "Why didn't you mention the dance?"

"'Cause I'm not going," Rory told her.

"Oh," Lorelai replied. "But why aren't you going?"

"'Cause I hate dances," Rory said.

Thea hated them too, but at least she attended a few just for experience.

"Good answer." Lorelai said, "Except you've never actually been to a dance."

Rory replied, "So?"

"So, you really have nothing to compare it to," Lorelai told her.

"No, but I can imagine it," Rory said.

"That's true," Lorelai told her. "However, not really, since you've never actually been to one. You're basing all your dance opinions on one midnight viewing of Sixteen Candles."

Thea never went to that midnight viewing because she wasn't invited.

Rory asked, "So?"

"So, you should have a decent reason for hating something before you really decide you hate it," Lorelai said.

"Trust me, I'll hate it," Rory said. "It'll be stuffy and boring, the music will suck and since none of the kids at school like me, I'll be stuck in the back listening to 98° watching Tristan and Paris argue over which one of them gets to make me miserable first."

"Okay," Lorelai said. "Or it'll be all sparkly and exciting and you'll be standing on the dance floor listening to Tom Waits with some great looking guy staring at you so hard that you don't even realize that Paris and Tristan have just been eaten by bears."

Rory asked, "What guy?"

"I don't know." Lorelai said, "Maybe the guy who hangs out in our trees all day waiting for you to come home – the guy that Thea shot an arrow at."

"Dean does not hang out in trees," Rory defended. "Thea shot an arrow at him?" 

"It was near him not at him," Thea defended herself. They made it sound like she actually hit the guy.

They ignored her in favor of talking about Rory's dance, so Thea turned on her walkman because it was the same shit, different day.

There were a lot of things that Thea could've lived without seeing. Seeing pictures of the female vice principal and one of the female gym teachers in very clearl sexual positions taped to her locker was one of those things that she could've lived without seeing. It wasn't just her locker; there were pictures on everyone else's locker. Why? It was just disgusting. The poor vice principal and the female gym teacher didn't deserve to have their...sexual pictures taped to everyone's lockers.

Why couldn't it have been Coach Rivers?

Thea ripped the pictures off of her locker while everyone else seemed to be talking about it excitedly.

Georgia came up to Thea, "Who the hell has enough time on their hands to make copies of these pictures and put them on everyone's lockers?" She was pissed. "Why would they do that to my volleyball coach?"

Thea was confused, "You...knew?"

"It was none of your business to know about Coach Garcia's orientation," Georgia told her.

"Yeah, I agree," Thea replied, not upset that Georgia didn't mention Coach Garcia's sexual orientation. It wasn't her business.

"What the fuck? What the fuck?" Liberty said, coming up to them. She had pictures. She looked disgusted, "What the fuck?"

Thea agreed. She had no words as to why or how. It was almost as baffling as the stolen sink and door. Honestly, the pictures were worse than a stolen sink and door.

The math teacher had put up a beaded curtain in the doorway of his classroom because he still hadn't gotten back the door and it was too 'expensive' to replace the door.

Lorelai ended up pulling a muscle in her lower back while making Rory's dress, according to Sage, because Sookie told him about it.

Sure, Thea felt sympathy for Lorelai, since Thea wasn't entirely heartless or made out of stone.

According to Lorelai, Emily was coming so she can watch Rory get ready for her first dance.

Thea told herself that she'll stay out of the way, by going to see a movie at the bookstore, then go to Luke's, and then to Georgia's house.

So, she was in the living room waiting for Sookie and Sage to arrive, so she can leave with Sage. She got up to look out the window.

Lorelai was on the couch, reading a magazine, and yelled, "Come on already!"

Rory called back, "I'm primping!"

Lorelai replied, "You're sixteen! You have skin like a baby's ass! There's nothing to primp!"

"Okay, okay, here I come," Rory replied.

She walked into the living room wearing her dress for the dance.

It was a nice dress, Thea guessed, but it was kind of plain. Maybe a few sequins or a pattern along the skirt, but Lorelai had done a good job on it. She played with her fingers.

"Wow," Lorelai said with a huge smile. "Someone hit you with a pretty stick."

"This dress is amazing," Rory said. "You outdid yourself."

"It's beautiful, babe, you look beautiful," Lorelai said. "Come here."

Thea went into the kitchen to look for something to snack on and heard the doorbell ring.

"It's open!" yelled Lorelai.

"It's me and Sage!" declared Sookie. "We got tacos!"

Lorelai replied, "Yay!"

Thea went to get the bag from Sookie and looked in it.

Sookie said, "I got extra hot sauce and a couple of extra burritos to put in the fridge in case you get hungry later."

"You take such good care of me," Lorelai told Sookie.

"Hey, Sookie," Rory said. "Look."

Sookie gasped, "Oh my god! You're a movie star! Doesn't she look like one, Sage?"

"Sure," Sage replied.

"At some point tonight, walk down a flight of stairs. Movie stars always walk down staircases," Sookie told Rory.

"Okay, come on, let me spray while you try to figure out what she just said," Lorelai said.

It was pretty obvious what Sookie was saying. Thea glanced at Sage who shrugged.

"You don't move," Sookie said, taking the hairspray from Rory. "I got it." She ended up spraying herself in the eyes, "Oh!"

"Mom," Sage said, worried.

"Sookie," Lorelai said also concerned.

"Wrong way! I got it," Sookie said.

Sage asked, "Are you okay, Mom?"

"Yeah, sweetie," Sookie said, handing the hairspray to Thea. "Hand that to Lorelai. And my eyelashes are stuck together."

Thea handed the hairspray over to Lorelai and Sookie staggered.

Sage had grabbed onto Sookie, "Mom, are you sure you're fine?"

"I am," Sookie said and Sage led her to the kitchen to wash her eyes.

Thea took the tacos with her to the kitchen.

Sage, "Hey, Thea, is this soap in this silver bottle?" He held it up.

"No," Thea said. "This is soap." She went to go hand him the soap.

Rory came in and got a taco. She put a kitchen towel in her dress as a makeshift bib.

The doorbell rang.

"We're in here!" yelled Lorelai.

Emily walked in, "We're in here? That's how you answer the door?"

"Well, I was all out of Saran Wrap," Lorelai said.

"I don't want to figure that one out," Emily replied. "I just want to see my granddaughter. Where is she?"

Thea gave Sage a look. See granddaughter not granddaughters.

"Okay, Rory, come in here please," Emily said.

Rory went into the living room.

Sage was done washing the hairspray out of Sookie's eyes.

"Okay, Sage," Sookie said to the fridge. "I think I'm going to head home."

Thea asked, "Should you be driving?"

"We walked," Sage told her, watching Sookie leave the kitchen right as Rory came into the kitchen to discard the towel and taco, so she can put the heels on.

"We should probably head on over to the bookstore," Thea said.

"Rory, let's go! Your public awaits!" called Lorelai.

Thea headed for the door with Sage.

Emily seemed to perk up, "Oh; is this Rory's date to the dance?" She seemed appreciative, like she was approving Rory's 'choice' in a guy.

"No," Sage said, sounding horrified. "I'm Thea's boyfriend."

"Oh," Emily replied because he wasn't Rory's date.

They took off.

"Thea's grandmother thought I was Rory's date to her stupid dance," Sage told his friends when they got to the line to the bookstore.

"She didn't look happy when he said that he was dating me," Thea replied.

Georgia laughed, "It's her fault for assuming."

Liberty nodded with a smirk. "How would she have reacted if you mentioned Aiden?"

"I think she would've exploded," Sage said with a laugh.

Aiden laughed.

"Sookie also sprayed herself in the face with hairspray," Thea added.

"That's awful," Georgia said.

"I think that happened to me once," Liberty said. "It was hell. I cried a little."

"A little?" asked Thea.

"I'm not going to say it," Liberty said. "I have a reputation to uphold as a bad bitch."
Thea, Aiden, Sage and Georgia looked at her in disbelief.

Liberty tried to be tough but she really was a total softie deep down. She probably got it from Luke, who presented himself as a gruff and rough around the edges guy, but he really was a softie.

After the movie (The Fly, the 1986 version) was over, they went to Luke's for dessert: pie and hot chocolate.

There was a lull in conversation.

"I shot an arrow at Dean," Thea told them.

Liberty looked at her, "For a moment there, I thought you said you shot Dean and I was so confused."

"That would've been far more interesting to have happened instead of getting those pictures taped on my laptop," Aiden said.

Sage said, "Who got those pictures? Why did they do that to them?"

"Thanks," Thea said. "I wanted to forget about those pictures."

Georgia groaned, "My history class kept talking about it."

"I wasn't," Sage said, because he shared the history class with Georgia.

Thea and Aiden shared a math class while Thea and Liberty shared a chemistry class.

"I just hope something that much more interesting happens at school because I don't want to hear about the vice principal and gym teacher banging for a few weeks," Aiden said.

"I don't want to hear that while eating," Thea said, grimacing at the thought.

Liberty nodded, "Yeah. I don't think my dad would be happy if I vomited all over the counter, because he'll be the one to clean it."

"Got that right," Luke said, coming out of the kitchen, hearing Liberty's statement. "What are you talking about?"

"Our female vice principal and female gym teacher's sex pictures that were taped on everyone's lockers," Liberty told him.

Luke made a face and shook his head, "What is going on in your school?"

"Trust me," Thea told him. "I've been wondering the same thing since Rory left for Chilton."

"The school was normal then she left," Sage stated.

Georgia nodded, "Pretty weird but funny."

After Luke's, Thea and Liberty went to Georgia's house to hang out while Sage went home to check on his mother since she had sprayed hair spray in her eyes, and Aiden had gone home too.

So, when Thea got back to her home, she was surprised to hear Rory and Lorelai arguing.

Lorelai was saying, "What were you thinking? Staying out all night! Are you insane?"

"I'm sorry," Rory said. "It was an accident."

"You're talking to the queen of staying out all night. I invented the concept! This is no accident! You can't do this! Period," Lorelai told her.

Rory replied, "Nothing happened!"

Thea hated to admit it, but she believed Rory.

Lorelai said, "Do you have any idea what it's like to wake up with mother here and find out that you never came home?"

"So all this is about Grandma being here," Rory said.

"No, it's about the feeling of complete terror when your kid isn't in her bed in the morning," Lorelai told her.

"I'm sorry," Rory replied. "And why aren't you mad when Thea's out all night?"

"This is not about her," Lorelai replied. "It's about you especially when I find out that you spent the night with some guy," Lorelai said.

"I didn't spend the night with him," Rory defended herself. "We fell asleep. And Thea is the one who's out all night having sex with two different guys!"

"You are going on the pill," Lorelai told her.

"What?" asked Rory.

"You are not getting pregnant," Lorelai said.

Rory said, "I'm not sleeping with Dean! Thea is the one who's screwing two guys! Why aren't you making her go on the pill?"

Lorelai yelled, "You're the good girl and Thea is Thea! Damn it!"

So in short, Thea was the town bicycle and it was expected of her while Rory was the goody two-shoes.

Rory said, "What happened to all that stuff you said to Grandma? What happened to trusting me? Where did all that go?"

"I think it's back on Patty's yoga mats," Lorelai said.

Rory replied, "This is crap! You know I didn't do anything. You know this is an accident. You're just mad because I was the one who screwed up instead of it being Thea like you expect and I did it in front of Grandma and she nailed you for it. Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I was the one who screwed up this time and I'm sorry that you got yelled at, but I didn't do anything and you know it!"

Thea went upstairs. She knew that they'll end up making up eventually.