"Once we grow up,
learn our words and really start talking,
the harder it becomes to know what to say.
Or how to ask for what we really need"
Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

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EXTREME RULES

"Is Jon still pissed about Mitch?" Brie sighed, despite her being by his side as he had stitches due to him being collateral damage in Mitch's untimely death.

"That's an understatement. You saw how Jericho ran past us when we wanted to check on Jon. He wanted to beat Jericho's ass so I'm sure we will be entertained tonight" I shrugged with it being the morning of Extreme Rules where my brotha would be competing in the first ever Asylum match.

I was personally happy about it because I knew he had been extremely excited when they gave him the freeway to do as he pleased with the match.

"So are you guys just going to act like I am not here?" Nicole's voice cut through Brie's as she had been voicing her thoughts of getting them another plant or perhaps a dog. She wasn't sure...

We glanced up as we sat on the larger couch in the green room and her in the other. She had been doing whatever on her phone the entire drive over and hadn't shown any intention of wanting to converse with me. I hadn't even gotten a single hello, yet she was questioning me?

"I thought you liked being alone? I mean other than Colby's company?" I stared blankly at her and she frowned.

I didn't like that she merely assumed things regarding Sasha and I and chose to throw it in my face. Why did it matter if there were anything between Sasha and I? How did that even serve a point in how I felt regarding her and Seth.

Seth betrayed me more than once while Sasha had never done anything to her, she had no ground to stand on and the fact that she did throw it in my face, thinking it, meant that she still didn't understand why I was mad.

And that fucking hurt.

"Well you're one to talk Joe?" She narrowed her eyes at me and yes I could simply tell her that she was wrong. But I wanted to know why she was so mad about it...

"Oh my word, just stop you two. We're here to represent the company so we can we please just do that without you two acting like kids?" Brie sighed as she narrowed her eyes between us.

"Me? His the one who is shutting me out!" Nicole glared while I simply stood up and lifted my title onto my shoulder.

I sighed as I saw the door open and realized we had to head out. Nicole didn't hesitate in moving out immediately, I knew she was mad and apart of me knew she probably didn't even know her real reason for being upset.

But that's who Nicole was, if you didn't bother giving her attention she would try to make it seem like she didn't care either.

Like me.

"Shutting her out is not the answer Roman."

I didn't respond as she walked ahead. I didn't like shutting her out, I just wanted her to see how I was hurting. For her to realize I wasn't upset that she was with someone, I stood by before. But if her choice were different...

"So you were voted Diva of the Year last year, Longest Reigning Diva's Champion, you have had quite the busy year in 2015. You're currently on the road to recovery and now you're dating Seth Rollins?"

I held my small smile despite not liking where the interview was going but that's how it was with the women of the company. They were expected to indulge more to bring a different side to the company while many of the man were allowed to not even get questioned.

Perhaps it was in fear of what we would do if we didn't like the question, me being on the market was something I hadn't liked to even think of bringing up. I had plenty of female fans when I was engaged and knew most would be extremely happy to hear I was available.
But nearly two years after ending things I had managed to steer away from personal questions because I didn't want to entertain the idea of women thinking anything was okay. I was a man who knew what I wanted and that was Nicole so I would be patient.

"Really? I didn't know that." The other interviewer seemed surprised even though Seth had shared a few pictures of them gyming together. But then again the captions didn't give much away...

"Because Seth and I are just really good friends. We have both been injured so we can relate and help each other out" She briefly glanced my way while I tried to hide my disbelief, why was she hiding it?

The rest of the interview went well with them questioning us on our fitness routines and so on. Luckily for me, Brie had some weird routines that got me chuckling so I didn't end up brooding the entire time. While her and Dean had their differences it was clear they both believed in weird things.

"Nikki, do you still follow that now in your downtime?"

Brie rubbed my shoulder as I unintentionally tensed whenever Nicole spoke.

"Well yes, I'm hoping to get back real soon. As you can see, no neck brace so I am slowly but surely getting there. I have to get that back.. Well not that one.." She shrugged referring to my title and I smiled a bit realizing once she came back we could have what we wanted.

Wanted.

"You can fight Roman!" Brie called out and I chuckled while Nicole leaned over Brie in an attempt to attack me.

I missed her so much and perhaps I was being too hard on her. Brie had a point, I knew her well, so I knew she was most likely guarding herself and while most of the time I hadn't been the one she had walls up for I knew with how I acted I was...

We posed for a picture and Nicole walked off as we were on commercial to greet some fans.

"Please just talk to her. I try not to push you, Roman, but come on, you pushing her away must be confusing to her when you have stood by her through everything. You have unforgiven beef with Seth, not her. She is merely his girlfriend, sad but true."

She walked off and I glanced at Nicole hugging a little girl draped in her Fearless merchandise and sighed.

She caught me staring at her and came over with a small smile, perhaps just to not show any hostility towards me while we were surrounded. So I moved off the stage and she followed.

"At least you don't mind taking a picture with me" I heard her before turning to face her.

"I would like to do more. I do miss you, you know that." I admitted, something I hadn't done since she first came back, simply because she should have known but I doubt she did now.

"So you're good friends?" I questioned after she had been silent simply staring at the gold over my shoulder. I knew she was thinking, about what I wished I knew though...

"I don't need people analyzing another relationship. I learnt my lesson with John, so what they don't know won't hurt them" she shrugged and glanced away.

"You are the only one making this difficult, Joe."

I frowned a bit but decided to push Sasha back as she was, in reality, irrelevant between us.

"He betrayed me, not once but twice. I said nothing when you were friends back then and then he betrayed me again, Nicole. Twisted the knife deeper and deeper so what am I supposed to do?" I questioned trying to hold back my frustration because I would probably end up raising my voice if I didn't.

"Not take it out on me. " She simply said but I wanted more from her, needed more and my Nicole would have given it, would have known I needed to hear more.

"You are him though." I shrugged and walked off towards Brie as we went on set and ate burgers, well not Brie.

I joked around with Brie as Nicole moved away from us and I felt her eyes on me. I tried or at least I think I tried but staring at her and watching her barely put an effort into a few words wasn't something I liked.

"What happened?" Brie whispered clearly noticing it.

"She's with him Brie. I'm not going to tear her away from him, so nothing can happen. I just have to accept that sometimes people aren't meant to be in your life the way you want them to be. "

***

"It still fucking hurts. Can you see it? Now imagine the amount of blood that came out of there?" He said wide-eyed while I tried spotting the 'gash' made by a single tic-tac.

"Er we just got back from checking on Jericho, don't you think his worse off?" I raised my eyebrow, amused at how dramatic he was being, despite being used to his theatrics.

"Worse off? That shit was funny" He chuckled forgetting about the 'pain'.

I shook my head as Jericho had been cursing him ten thousand different ways while laughing and crying, not sure which emotion to choose as the little shits picked at his nerves.

Poor guy.

But that could serve as revenge for him walking out on us last year when we sealed his return.

"So how did this morning go? Was it a good morning?" Dean questioned as he accompanied me to the gorilla for my match. I knew it was due to Brie being back at the hotel with Nicole who hadn't wanted to come to the arena.

"No, not at all." I shook my head before sipping from my bottled water.

"I saw her back at the hotel. I don't know how long you are going to keep this up man. I get that she fucked up by falling for him. I get that you are hopelessly in love with her and she's too blind to see it. But, you see her happy with Colby? I see another substitute for you"

Of course he would be singing the same song Brie had about Nicole wanting me all along. But they didn't see what I did, Nicole saw me as the best friend I was and I saw her as the best friend who had always been the woman I loved.

"Then why isn't she with me? There is nothing stopping her" I stared at him and he rolled his eyes in return, causing me to stop as we waited for the commercial to end.

"Says the guy who is being an ass to her at every turn?"

"Oh not this shit again?" I heard AJ and chuckled.

When you're in a feud with a guy for a few months and end up travelling together too? With your brother who has a big mouth, he catches on...

"I can't help it. I love her and she is with him and I can't.." I sighed as AJ just nodded as he waited for his cue. He never gave much input, he was a good guy and I knew he didn't mess in anyone else's business so he might as well not have been there.

"I get it. I'm just saying, just try to let go and simply be what you always have been. I bet she doesn't even know the reason you are mad is because you wish you were in his shoes." Dean shrugged and AJ smiled knowing he was right.

"She doesn't" I admitted giving a nod to AJ as his music blasted.

"So she doesn't deserve to be hated on when you were always there no matter what!" He shouted over the music being quite loud, again repeating the same things I had heard from Brie earlier in the day.

"I'll try but when I look at her all I see is something I'll never have." I shrugged, grabbing my title from the table.

"Hey, Mitch is something I'll never have." He said seriously with a small smirk and I knew it was to get my mind off of her for the match.

"Oh yeah man still sorry about that" I nodded sympathetically having done it for the past week since Mitch passed.

"I'm so annoyed. It wasn't even in the script you know?" He grumbled now, being reminded of his anger despite getting retribution for it.

"Yeah so you have told me" I pat his shoulder.

"It was important to us. I'll have to go find another one. Its kinda like your title is to you or wait William. When last have you seen William?"

I glanced at the curtain knowing I had to head out soon.

"Its Winston and last week man. His staying at Kath's house remember?" I frowned and he nodded and I rolled my eyes as my music played.

***

I smiled as I retained it. With it came the ending of my chapter with AJ, while I had enjoyed making a couple new friends due it. I was happy for a new beginning. I moved away from the ropes to the center, raising it high. Dean was right, while Jojo and even Winston, who was like a dog version of a son, meant a lot to me.

So did the title, because while all my friends had their significant others. I had the title as my motivation in the absence of Nicole, because with it I was representing the entire company and...

I heard the crowd shift and I wasn't sure why until I turned and felt a boot to my gut. I frowned as I stared ahead and saw Seth. I had seen him earlier in the week on a crutch and here he was standing above me holding my title.

***

I threw my champion onto the bed having left the arena soon after my match. I knew the gang would be waiting backstage for me in my locker room where I had left them. We were meant to head out for beers with The Bullet club, but chances were, Seth would enter the same locker room and his return would be celebrated instead.

I paced up and down in my room after a quick shower, debating whether to go down to the hotel bar for a quick drink to calm me down or to stay on my own and drown my sorrows with silence. Of course I decided on the first but as I headed to the door it opened. Which didn't surprise me as I simply slammed it as soon as I had walked in.

I saw brown locks before seeing her enter the room. She didn't say anything but simply closed the door and stared at me.

I shook my head because while she was my calming source all these years, she was actually the last person I wanted to see.

With each betrayal The Authority were close behind Seth, letting him know what to do. Of course they were surely involved in this one too but only there was one person who also most likely knew.

Nicole.

"Of course you're here because he fucking is! What? Did you have a good fucking laugh after you left me this morning huh?" I glared her way feeling the anger make its way out of my body.

"Joe.."

"Did you see what he fucking did? I don't think you did because then you would be celebrating with your fucking boyfriend on his return!"

She had probably been right by his side as he recovered. She watched him walking on a crutch days before and probably knew he had no need for them. He was fooling us all and mostly me, as always, just waiting for me to let my guard down and sneaking in like the fucking scumbag he was...

"I know I.."

I didn't want to look at her because I knew she knew and she was simply doing what he always did to me. Hurt me, she was turning into him, not caring about anyone but themselves and that's where I realized my words earlier was right.

She was him...

"Just fucking go to him. I'll be fine, I have been without you for my entire reign. I sure as hell don't need you now, he's back now, so his going to take that fucking title too. He couldn't stand just having one fucking thing, he has to take it all. He has to leave me without so much as a fucking distraction while I'm out here on my own. He fucking takes everything that means the world to me. He takes everything from me!" I screamed out as I pushed a chair over and felt all the betrayals filling me again.

Most importantly losing Nicole to him...

"What?"

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Thanks so much for over 1K READS already! The feedback on the last chapter was just amazing, happy to see so many love each time. I know the GMA thing didn't happen then but I loved it sm when it did, just felt like including a rare Bella+Roman Empire moment in here 👊👊👊 Hopefully you liked!