"But sometimes her heart feels like
a small room filled with a thousand people
and none have the courage to leave."

◈◈◈

SURVIVOR SERIES

"She's so fucking beautiful, isn't she? I wish she was here though. I miss her. Do you think I should call her? Nah. She's probably napping. But maybe she won't mind waking up to my raspy voice, make her smile and giggle that adorable giggle."

"Oh I know that but let's not wake up a pregnant women. Ask Gee how that went down, it's not a good idea." I pat his back briefly glancing at the picture he was focused on.

"Woah woah woah woah woah! This is strictly a Raw locker room!" I heard Colby's voice as he followed with JeriKO strutting behind him. "I'm just messing with you man!"

He hopped onto Jon, causing me to roll my eyes as Jon dropped him before punching his chest and pulling him into another hug. "See that's how much I miss us together, I'm hugging him!"

"Yeah, I never used to get hugs" Colby shook his head disapprovingly.

"Cause you ain't a good hugger" Kevin shrugged.

"In fact...." Jericho began.

"I am not fucking making that list again! How am I not a good hugger?" He scoffed.

"Its not really your fault man. Its your size, Roman has the whole Samoan buff body and height" Kevin explained which caused me to raise my eyebrow slightly at Jon who simply smirked as he taped his hands and knew he would be heading to warm up soon.

"When have you even hugged Roman?"

"Never, I don't intend to either because I have my best friend right here. But I've seen how Jon cuddles up to him, I was worried that you two were secretly in love until I realized you were banging Nikki Bella" he chuckled and I narrowed my eyes at him as he finally looked at me.

"Sorry, in a relationship with her..." He rolled his eyes while Jericho smiled.

"Aaaah Kevin if you knew how long that took, he should be happy the list was still retired back then." He tutted.

"Until one of her exes start calling, Hey Big Guy!" Kevin winked.

"Don't say shit like that man, besides, none of her exes compare to my man over here" Jon glared which only led to a smirk forming.

"Maybe the lovers thing could still go"

"Fuck you" I chuckled and slowly tied my hair up.

I heard a knock on the door and frowned as I saw Nicole walking in causing the guy's to change their topic. "Aren't you supposed to be out there?"

I knew the women's match had started up and I had been heading to go watch it at the gorilla after my shower but of course Jon's homesickness for Brie caused me to remain behind.

"I figured you guy's had a monitor in here, my storyline is taking a different turn in that its actually evolving into something. So I'm taken out of the match..." She shrugged with a sigh causing the guys' attention to shift to something else detecting her slight mood change.

"You were so excited though" I whispered pulling on her hand so she could sit on my lap and I didn't have to speak too loudly with the other guys in the room.

"I know but you know how they are, they let you believe one thing and you're so prepared and then you see Carrano giving you the eye and I'm just like fuck." She held a small smile as she hooked her fingers into my vest. "But I spoke to Bryan now and apparently this is a move into me actually getting a storyline. I mean Carmella and I are feuding but they want to make it more detailed, we'll still basically be ranting off but somehow it will be different. I'm pretty sure they just don't know what to do with me so I can be relevant."

I sighed and wrapped my arms tightly around her, "now that's a far stretch and we both know it. You are currently relevant, these people have been waiting for your return. Your merch is selling like hot cakes to men and women, you're making your Mr Monkey proud."

"Monkey? I always figured Colby resembling it more." Kevin's voice echoed behind me.

I rolled my eyes, "Can you guys at least act like you aren't listening?"

"Actually not, we have gone from not only having an enemy in our headquarters but another one and a woman. You could be fucking trading secrets, so please speak louder."

"What secrets?" I chuckled as Nicole giggled and shook her head at Jericho's words.

"Don't worry I'll be leaving the Raw headquarters, there's champagne in Smackdown's anyway." She slowly moved off my lap but I followed behind her.

"They might have champagne but I highly doubt quickies are allowed. My dear man, you are going to have to make the list." Jericho said seriously.

"As if Joe would ever fuck at work" Colby scoffed and I closed the door behind us with a sigh seeing her small smile.

"You sigh but I'm sure you enjoy their craziness." She groaned wrapping her one arm around me as we walked down the hallway.

"I do, but I enjoy your company more."

"My company or my moaning?" She bit her lip as she playfully smiled which led to me smirking but I knew if we went down that road I wouldn't make it for my match.

"Both. This feud with Carmella or the one you're transitioning into, do you have any idea to what extent its going to go?" I wearily asked because while I knew her feud with Carmella was kind of messy, a planned feud made me even more concerned for how detailed they would go with certain things.

"You might be dragged in, you wanted to stay away from me because you were afraid you would taint my work but it seems I'll be doing a pretty good job at that" She cringed and I knew she pretty much was probably left in the dark of what her storyline would entail.

"I don't mind what is said about me, Nicole. All I care about is how the woman I love will be affected by them, especially when I'm not backstage to comfort you first thing if something said unintentionally opens an old wound." I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her body tightly against mine seeing her smile appear as her fingertips traced over my arms.

"Luckily all my wounds disappeared the day you made me yours."

I smiled brightly at her words and immediately lift her into my arms causing her breath to slightly hitch as she stared down at me. "And that's how you remind me why I love you so much, I'm a grumpy ass man without my beautiful Latina around. I'm horny, I'm lonely.. Fuck I miss you so much. Its hard for me.."

I set her down and leaned against a crate and she hopped on beside me, "It's hard for me too, but it also makes our time together more precious. Moments like these are like heaven and it makes me realize just how much they meant to me when we were in denial. This place is like home and that's mostly because of you. I honestly don't know how my life would be without Joseph Anoa'i. From the very first day we met up until you debuting on the main roster, the reason why Brie and I know that you and Jon are for us was because we didn't have to try. You guys made sure you remained in our lives..."

"Nah you're giving us too much credit, Nicole. I remember being back in FCW and thinking why the hell are these women still contacting us. 'We're in the minor leagues, we're basically just ghosts..' Its weird, in this business we meet so many people but yet we knew that you and Brie were important to us. And back then it was just people to guide us and now you're people who guide our hearts." I chuckled running my hand over my face realizing just how sappy I sounded.

"Or your face to my heart" She nudged me and I smirked and leaned forward, playfully biting her cleavage and she pushed my face away with a giggle but then smiled past me.

I frowned but then realized who was there, "Vince"

"How are you two doing?" He questioned seeming to be in a good mood.

"Great!" She smiled hopping off and hugging him. "I'll see you later, Joe. My women will kill me if I'm not waiting at the gorilla win or lose!"

I nodded and sighed as Vince smirked. "That smirk could either be a 'you're in trouble or well done' "

"Oh I don't know, son. Let's be optimistic and say its a well done. You've managed to rebuild yourself over these last few months.."

"And not question you about Nikki's storyline. I respect your decisions, Vince and Nicole can handle herself so I wouldn't come into your office demanding things.." I began but he shook his head.

"I have known you for most of your life and I know that is not you. You have a temper on you but you know the time and the place for it most of the time. I know I went back on my words by bringing you into the feud between Nikki and the new talent. But the writers proposed it and it seemed interesting, I'll be honest with you. Eva was suspended, we weren't ready to bring Nicole back but we needed her. But we were at a loss, there were two options. Bring her onto Raw and have her team with you once again. She just returned from a neck injury, the crowd would be behind her and we could get that support onto you but..."

"But unlike the last time we were put together, I'm much more invested." And by invested, I was referring to Nicole and I officially being together. Yes there was no denying I cared deeply about her back then but she had John, so there'd be a line I wouldn't cross. Because just as I had a good relationship with Vince, so did he and I liked to believe with that Nicole would never be hurt or forced into a corner. But then she was forced to blindside Brie...

Vince could be your best friend but he could also be the man who ruined your life for ratings. It was a business in the end and we were at fault for mixing it with pleasure I suppose.

"Exactly, I meant what I said before. Couples at work can create conflict so while I know both of you would have preferred working together this is for the better. " He slowly sighed sending a nod to Finlay who passed by.

"I understand that, but if there comes a time when things go too far..."

"Joe, things always go too far. That's what this business thrives on, the only thing you should be concerned about is rising on Raw while Nicole does the same." I reluctantly nodded hearing the announcements going off letting me know we were up next.

He shook my hand one more time before heading his own way while I shook my head knowing while I had the crowds to win over, Nicole was being used to help the new women rise. She would be collateral damage and we both knew it, but we didn't want to admit it.

"Where'd Nikki go?" Colby asked as he left while Jon ran off to find his team.

"To support her girls, I heard the music and it wasn't Smackdown."

"And Charlotte was nervous she wouldn't be able to beat them" He scoffed causing me to frown at him mentioning her.

"Since when are you hanging out with the other women around here?"

"Hey! I have other friends, what do you think I was doing when you had a stick up your ass for three years?"

I shrugged, "Well Charlotte got lucky. If Nikki were in there, Smackdown would have taken it. You know Nikki and her matches were ruthless and Nicole dominated her."

"That was then." Jericho added as they followed down the hallway causing me to turn.

"What do you mean?"

"Woah, hold the glare, Superman!" Kevin pushed me back.

"Its okay, Owens. I'm used to it when it comes to Nikki"

"We all are" Colby chuckled.

"I just meant that with her neck injury she can't do the moves she used to. Maybe that's why they pulled her out for tonight, they were afraid she's been booked too much and all those women and the physicality. They can't control it, its risky..."

I sighed as I hadn't thought about how things would change in that aspect for her and she hadn't really voiced any concerns about it.

"They have other plans for her. She might have suffered an injury but it has only made her stronger, it hasn't weakened her." I firmly stated knowing that the promos for her feuds were bothering her more than anything else.

"Is that what you see or what she wants you and the world to see?"

◆◆◆

"They're like freaking animals" Renee laughed out as we watched the guys go at it while being seated in gorilla.

"Imagine you ended up joining them instead of Shane!" I massaged Bryan's shoulder causing him to chuckle as Roman's mid-air spear, did not end well for Shane who had stumbled back a few moments ago with Vince following leaving not much Authority at gorilla.

I had been concerned leaving him and Joe alone but I also didn't want an awkward encounter in case Vince chose then to lecture me on blasting to the world about our relationship. He had basically left me no choice with Carmella implying things between Colby and I but I knew if things didn't go Vince's way it would end up biting you in the ass..

"Well it would be a first but I happen to like the backstage view more of late." He shrugged, glancing over at Renee who was seated on the desk Vince had vacated.

"Backstage view or the person you share it with?" I teased causing Renee to giggle.

"Oh I wanted to show you something!" She quickly hopped off and squeezed between us.

"What?"

I frowned seeing a picture of a house on her phone, "We found a great home in Seattle."

"You guys are moving in together?" I smiled to hide the surprise in my voice.

"Yes! We've been scouting for places and finally found it. " The excitement was evident and I hugged her tightly, I loved Colby but after he had hurt her I saw the spark slowly fade. It was hard to watch and hard because both of them were so important in my life and I wasn't sure how to handle it. Bryan was an anchor in her life and Joe was mine, and to think Bryan had a crush on Brie a couple years ago...

"Did you just see that?" I heard Jon as he entered the gorilla, almost ten minutes after he had been eliminated. First might I had, we had dealt with the JeriKO rants before they went to shower but I knew Jon didn't mind gracing us with his lunatic odour.

"I know, you poor thing!" Renee shook her head disapprovingly but scooted over due to his sweaty body as he flopped himself beside us.

I rolled my eyes and continued watching with my man and Colby being the last men standing for Team Red. I would have been concerned last year this time, if they had been tossed into a match like this but their nods of approval to reassure each other brought happiness to my face.

"What were you thinking bullying Joe?" I narrowed my eyes at Jon, the view had been hilarious as I wasn't sure what exactly his intentions were but I didn't appreciate it.

"I was thinking, get the Samoan in the ring so I can eliminate him" He rolled his eyes dramatically.

"And then you went and got your ass eliminated first, you're putting Brie in a very awkward position" Renee stated seriously.

"And why is that, Yellow Rainbow?" He scoffed causing both of our faces to fill with confusion before Renee got to her point.

"You're going to call her tonight, asking if she enjoyed and what's she going to say? Oh I enjoyed watching my baby daddy getting eliminated first"

He seemed to think for a bit, "I'm going to be a baby daddy, does that still count if we get hitched?"

"You aren't hitched so it doesn't really matter, Jon!" I shook my head as while he was the first to knock up Brie I would have liked to be the first to walk down the aisle at least.

"How do you know? We could have gotten hitched by Elvis" He smiled excitedly causing me to actually search his blue eyes to make sure he was lying.

"Yeah I would have believed that if Brie Mode was in play, but not so much now." I giggled as I leaned back watching Joe become quite aggressive as he and Colby held the fort down.

"Hey Nick" I smiled noticing him as he seated himself beside me, it was weird, Nick had hurt me the most yet we had remained sort of on good terms. He was a good guy, just not a good boyfriend I suppose...

"Hey NICK" Jon smiled pulling me closer to him.

"Jon!" I giggled at him looking out for Joe and glared considering I had showered before I came here.

"I come with no harm, just wanted to see whether Smackdown will survive or not." He shrugged amused by Jon.

"Yeah well I highly doubt you will survive if Roman comes backstage and sees you next to his woman."

"He shouldn't be worried. I really thought he would have been your next stop after me." He casually said as I managed to pry Jon's hands off me as he went across the room to get some water.

"What?"

"I mean, he basically handled our entire break-up. Came to fetch your things, gave me the whole give Nicole space speech. It was obvious he cared about you, a lot. The only threat right now is John."

Lunatic Jon across the room laughed out loudly at that, "Sorry and no offense to you, Bella. But I'm more into Brie Mode"

"Not you, dumbass! Her ex..."

"John's with April.." I sighed not needing to hear this.

"Out of all women, he goes for her?" He questioned knowingly, expecting me to follow whatever train of thought he was on.

"Yeah, I guess my exes love sharing women!" I briefly narrowed my eyes which led to him chuckling until I saw Jon breeze past me and Bryan attempt to stop him but it was too late.

"I do miss Brie for the way she could control him." He sighed sitting down as Jon attacked AJ out in the arena, what had sparked it I wasn't sure. Maybe Renee pointing out that Brie hadn't been entertained enough by him.

The officials followed to remove him but only the look on my man's face and Colby's led me to believe they weren't going to leave it like that.

"Oh shit" I blurted out.

"Oh no" Bryan sighed.

"Oh you are not stopping this!" Renee squealed as the crowd erupted with the guys going to Jon's aid.

It was a mixture of emotions filling me, to some people it was just a brief reunion to me it was seeing the men who were important in my life showing what the world couldn't see. They were all brothers, no matter who betrayed who, who messed up whatever, they were brothers and when push came to shove they'd defend each other to the end.

"I'm guessing Shane won't be as amused as the rest of the arena?" I turned to Bryan who simply shook his head as Jon was now dragged out again.

I immediately opened my arms wide as Joe walked through the curtain. I hated that it had to be him who lost it for his team but knew to some extent he was still being punished. The crowd loved it, gave them another reason to boo him and I was sure the hate would follow onto Raw.

"I'm sorry you lost, Joe." I groaned into his chest and saw his eyes briefly fall on Nick who spoke to Renee in the distance before settling on me.

"With you I'm always a winner, babe." He smirked and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead and I closed my eyes savouring the soft contact. I wasn't sure what Nick meant by his words hinting towards John when the last time I had seen him we barely spoke more than a few words. He was happy with April and I was madly in love with Joe, I didn't need to be concerned with exes causing unnecessary trouble when I had the only man I wanted in my arms.

"I love you, Mr Monkey." I whispered leaning up to meet his lips. "Donuts and me as a consolation prize? "

He chuckled loudly before briefly kissing my lips. "That sounds like a plan, Mrs Monkey..."

♥♥♥♥

CONGRATS TO NICOLE ON BEING ON DWTS!!!! AND ICD WITH HOW INTENSE JOHN + ROMAN'S FEUD IS, ALL I KNOW IS I WANT ROMAN TO CONQUER!! JOHN JUST KEEPS PISSING HIM OFF WITH THE PERSONAL INSULTS, HE NEEDS A SUPERMAN PUNCH 😝😝😝
I JUST LOVE HOW ROMAN GETS HIM THOUGH, THAT BIG DOG!😍😍😍😍